Don't beat yourself up over the choices you have made. You realize what you did was a mistake and you have confessed it and as long as you move forward from there, theres no reason you shouldnt be a leader a still. God still loves you!!! I myself was tempted in my last relationship and in the end did go farther than I ever should have, and had a similar result with the guy involved and I felt broken and used when it was all over. Since than though I've learned so much and it has brought me closer to God and only God can heal those wounds cause both by family and by the guy in this situation. And about the people who are judging you they have committed sin to.

If you need anyone to talk to I'm here. And I love to listen, I may not give the best advice but I always try my best