Starting the process of conquering problems with others including family

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Mar 4, 2013
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[SUP]We can arbitrarily say that Satan is the source of the problem. Generically this is true, but that is a cop-out statement. The identification of Satan's tactics is the source that needs to be identified in order to have any hope of conquering the problem that exists. If that is done in peace by all involved, it will reveal who or what the adversary is using. At the same time we all should understand that the adversary's tactics demand to be hidden to prohibit identification. Therefore, we can expect more tactics to be added to the original so it cannot be identified, directing our attention to others things that cause additional problems and redundancy of figure pointing and adversity. What makes it even harder, the person or persons who are succumbing to the tactics that cause adversity (because of pride or an exalted self-image) will also fight in order not to be identified. Please present Biblical principles, contending for the faith, and being more than conquerers through Christ our Lord. What is the self image of all involved need to be in order to make it work?
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Matthew 11:28-31

28 [/SUP]Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.
[SUP]29 [/SUP]Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls.
[SUP]30 [/SUP]For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.
 
D

Delivery

Guest
#2
There are 2 things that brought down the anointing and blessings of God on the early church in the book of acts: Their unity and their obedience.
 
Mar 4, 2013
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There are 2 things that brought down the anointing and blessings of God on the early church in the book of acts: Their unity and their obedience.
Ananias and Sapphira come to mind. My question originates in respect to my son-in-law and daughter in relation to the inheritance of land that we gave to our daughter after they were married. They accuse us of interfering according to what we see as proper stewardship of the land given to us by God. Now we have a grievous schism because the property is not being taking care of, and after 9 years, without any debt to them, they have little or no finances available to sustain the gift or improve on it. It seems my son-in-law has a conflict with me because he demands total say so. What are God's ordinances concerning this matter? We have major problems because our suggestions are taken as dictation and have become resented by them.
 
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Jon4TheCross

Senior Member
Oct 19, 2012
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Luke 8:21Authorized (King James) Version (AKJV)

21*And he answered and said unto them, My mother and my brethren are these which hear the word of God, and do it.

There is one needful thing...
Hearing the Word of God is the one needful thing...and reading the Bible is a form of that. Such an example can fix many problems...and show who the real family is (luke 10:38-42)

John 3:20-22Authorized (King James) Version (AKJV)

20*For every one that doeth evil hateth the light, neither cometh to the light, lest his deeds should be reproved. 21*But he that doeth truth cometh to the light, that his deeds may be made manifest, that they are wrought in God.

22*After these things came Jesus and his disciples into the land of Judæa; and there he tarried with them, and baptized.
 
Mar 4, 2013
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Our daughter is quiting her job because of a nervous breakdown, is extremely angry with my wife, believing it's right to be submissive to her husband, and we agree that is right. Our grandson is a marine, away from home, and wants to be involved to assist in a Godly solution, but our daughter and son-in-law seems to have refused our grandson's efforts to instigate communication. We have instigated communication in the past but nothing is accomplished, and we then are to blame for instigating conversation because it is taken as dictation. We are now waiting for them to start the process that they refuse to do. Broken hearts are the outcome. Are there any old testament laws that would tell us God's will for the way inheritances (under these situations) need to be possessed and taken care of according to His will?
 
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Mar 4, 2013
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Luke 8:21Authorized (King James) Version (AKJV)

21*And he answered and said unto them, My mother and my brethren are these which hear the word of God, and do it.

There is one needful thing...
Hearing the Word of God is the one needful thing...and reading the Bible is a form of that. Such an example can fix many problems...and show who the real family is (luke 10:38-42)

John 3:20-22Authorized (King James) Version (AKJV)

20*For every one that doeth evil hateth the light, neither cometh to the light, lest his deeds should be reproved. 21*But he that doeth truth cometh to the light, that his deeds may be made manifest, that they are wrought in God.

22*After these things came Jesus and his disciples into the land of Judæa; and there he tarried with them, and baptized.
How true this scripture is!
 
V

Viligant_Warrior

Guest
#7
Are there any old testament laws that would tell us God's will for the way inheritances (under these situations) need to be possessed and taken care of according to His will?
Do not look to Old Testament laws to resolve New Testament issues.

Christ is the answer, and "Love God, love others" is the guiding concept here. Until your daughter and son-in-law are willing to submit to Christ instead of seeking their own wills and ways, there is little you or your grandson can do but pray for them, listen when they willingly speak, gently and lovingly rebuke them when their talk becomes blame rather than discussion, and offer a hand whenever they are willing to accept it.

That's my advice, from my chair in my office outside of which it says I'm licensed to say things like that to others. But I trust God, not me or anyone else with a license. He has the best and brightest answers.
 
Mar 4, 2013
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Do not look to Old Testament laws to resolve New Testament issues.

Christ is the answer, and "Love God, love others" is the guiding concept here. Until your daughter and son-in-law are willing to submit to Christ instead of seeking their own wills and ways, there is little you or your grandson can do but pray for them, listen when they willingly speak, gently and lovingly rebuke them when their talk becomes blame rather than discussion, and offer a hand whenever they are willing to accept it.

That's my advice, from my chair in my office outside of which it says I'm licensed to say things like that to others. But I trust God, not me or anyone else with a license. He has the best and brightest answers.
I relate this situation in respect to this scripture, not in the physical but in the spiritual application. Circumcision is now of the heart, not the flesh. My son-in law received the blessing of inheritance via our daughter. If he had received the inheritance by his own father it would be a totally different case wouldn't it?

Exodus 12:48 And when a stranger shall sojourn with thee, and will keep the passover to the Lord, let all his males be circumcised, and then let him come near and keep it; and he shall be as one that is born in the land: for no uncircumcised person shall eat thereof.

Philippians 3:3 For we are the circumcision, which worship God in the spirit, and rejoice in Christ Jesus, and have no confidence in the flesh.

Romans 11:17-18
17 And if some of the branches be broken off, and thou, being a wild olive tree, wert grafted in among them, and with them partakest of the root and fatness of the olive tree;
[SUP]18 [/SUP]Boast not against the branches. But if thou boast, thou bearest not the root, but the root thee.
 
Dec 26, 2014
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yes, the TORAH is the best guide any one on earth has. TORAH leads to Yahshua Hamashiach also, always. (if people listen and follow).

people who reject TORAH also are rebelling against Yahweh Almighty, and rejecting His Son Yahshua.

one aspect though
(NT won't ever contradict OT/TORAH)(YAHSHUA never ;departed from TORAH) -->

15 Then to the people he said, “Be careful to guard against all forms of greed, because even if someone is rich, his life does not consist in what he owns.”

4 “My friends, I tell you: don’t fear those who kill the body but then have nothing more they can do. 5 I will show you whom to fear: fear him who after killing you has authority to throw you into Gei-Hinnom! Yes, I tell you, this is the one to fear! 6 Aren’t sparrows sold for next to nothing, five for two assarions? And not one of them has been forgotten by God. 7 Why, every hair on your head has been counted! Don’t be afraid, you are worth more than many sparrows.
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Luke 12:13-14Complete Jewish Bible (CJB)

13 Someone in the crowd said to him, “Rabbi, tell my brother to share with me the property we inherited.”

14 But Yeshua answered him, “My friend, who appointed me judge or arbitrator over you?
Complete Jewish Bible (CJB)

Copyright © 1998 by David H. Stern. All rights reserved.





Our daughter is quiting her job because of a nervous breakdown, is extremely angry with my wife, believing it's right to be submissive to her husband, and we agree that is right. Our grandson is a marine, away from home, and wants to be involved to assist in a Godly solution, but our daughter and son-in-law seems to have refused our grandson's efforts to instigate communication. We have instigated communication in the past but nothing is accomplished, and we then are to blame for instigating conversation because it is taken as dictation. We are now waiting for them to start the process that they refuse to do. Broken hearts are the outcome. Are there any old testament laws that would tell us God's will for the way inheritances (under these situations) need to be possessed and taken care of according to His will?
 
P

Powemm

Guest
#10
God has been working with me in this area lately.. I use to react instead of respond... always ended up as tinder that went up in flames ... today I seek gods heart in situations.. what is most pleasing to him in how I am responding.. its not been easy.. but I know with more integrity towards god my integrity no matter whats going on around me will become stronger because of gods I territory towards me when I act up. He is patient so that none should perish... comparing myself to a holy God is the best comparison i have in my own behavior towards others no matter how they act. The end result im finding is when comparing my behavior in what is pleasing towards god.. im less offended and react far less than I use too
 
Mar 4, 2013
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God has been working with me in this area lately.. I use to react instead of respond... always ended up as tinder that went up in flames ... today I seek gods heart in situations.. what is most pleasing to him in how I am responding.. its not been easy.. but I know with more integrity towards god my integrity no matter whats going on around me will become stronger because of gods I territory towards me when I act up. He is patient so that none should perish... comparing myself to a holy God is the best comparison i have in my own behavior towards others no matter how they act. The end result im finding is when comparing my behavior in what is pleasing towards god.. im less offended and react far less than I use too
Good point. I wish they would give us the opportunity to say "I forgive you." We have asked for forgiveness in other instances even though proven innocent after the facts were revealed. I asked my son-in-alw (after another dispute last year) if he knew who was guilty for false accusations and assumptions, and he said he didn't know. I said that it would be vise to find out, and sense, I haven't heard any further explanations of "why" "what" or "who" concerning this said infraction of the past. Now it happens again when we wanted to endorse some ideas to financially help them to build a new house on the property given. :confused: We were never even given a change to express any ideas before they got angry. We just asked them if they had a time scheduled on when they would want to build a new house and then bam!!!! big problems just that fast. Our grandson and his wife are nervous about not being able come home in a year and a half, giving them time and a place to abode while they begin to established themselves into the civilian world after his ets. We feel they will also be angry that our grandson and his wife will have to live with us for that time instead. We told them they could if all else failed just to try to give a little peace of mind.
 
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L

Least

Guest
#12
I considered Numbers 30, but I'm not sure that this applies, unless there's something from times past that would tie to the current situation.

One thing that I've been recognizing is that even in the midst of trials, God can take what was bad and make it good. "Faith the substance of things hoped for the evidence of things not seen." I do believe that God can turn entire situations around.

Another thing that has really been an encouragement for me, and I hope that it will offer some encouragement to you and your wife, is: "all things work together for the good of those who love Him who are called according to His purpose."

I'm praying that God will give you both strength, wisdom and peace in dealing with the situation as well as restoration of the relationships of all involved.
 

MarcR

Senior Member
Feb 12, 2015
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#13
I think that the problem with giving a gift without stipulations is that you ,, in doing that, surrender control.

I believe that is the reason that many of god's gifts and promises have 'if' conditions attached to them.

After a gift has been given unconditionally it is too late to impose advise or conditions unless they are well received.
 
Feb 7, 2015
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I think that the problem with giving a gift without stipulations is that you ,, in doing that, surrender control.

I believe that is the reason that many of god's gifts and promises have 'if' conditions attached to them.

After a gift has been given unconditionally it is too late to impose advise or conditions unless they are well received.
Did you really mean what showed up on my screen?
 
Mar 4, 2013
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I think that the problem with giving a gift without stipulations is that you ,, in doing that, surrender control.

I believe that is the reason that many of god's gifts and promises have 'if' conditions attached to them.

After a gift has been given unconditionally it is too late to impose advise or conditions unless they are well received.
What about the attitude of wanting the gift to succeed for the recipient? We gave it to our daughter for her sake but she is being submissive to her husband who is in rebellion against her own parents, and that is by far the reason for her nervous breakdown she is experiencing at this time. She already has literally a whole in her heart and the doctor visits become more numerous, and expensive because of "affordable health care." She has put in her notice to quit her job. The strain on her is appalling and we are even thinking she my die before we do as our son did 10 years ago of a heart attack. For us to turn away is a sin and I consider it unloving just for the sake of us not having to suffer through false accusations, yearning, and heartache.
 
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MarcR

Senior Member
Feb 12, 2015
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#17
I can't without knowing you and your daughter much better than I do try to mediate between you.

I simply pointed out that if you were concerned about the gift being misused; you could have put stipulations on the gift before it was given. After it has been unconditionally; it is too late for unwelcome advice.

The commandment to honor one's father and mother should possibly make her more open to your counsel; but I don't know the dynamics in your confrontation.
 
Mar 4, 2013
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#18
I can't without knowing you and your daughter much better than I do try to mediate between you.

I simply pointed out that if you were concerned about the gift being misused; you could have put stipulations on the gift before it was given. After it has been unconditionally; it is too late for unwelcome advice.

The commandment to honor one's father and mother should possibly make her more open to your counsel; but I don't know the dynamics in your confrontation.
At the beginning I had no concerns. My mistake. It never crossed my mind. Years ago as this problem was escalating our daughter said it was becoming very hard for her having to choose between her husband and her dad. Being submissive to her husband left no alternative but to dishonor her parents. That's the way it is.
 
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MarcR

Senior Member
Feb 12, 2015
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#19
I think that Scripture does indeed tell her to obey her husband.

When you gave the land, you could have said something like: 'I'm giving you this land provided you maintain it, pay taxes on it, and keep it in the family. If you can't or won't do these things I want it back'.

If you didn't do that you lost the opportunity.
 
Feb 21, 2012
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Our daughter is quiting her job because of a nervous breakdown, is extremely angry with my wife, believing it's right to be submissive to her husband, and we agree that is right. Our grandson is a marine, away from home, and wants to be involved to assist in a Godly solution, but our daughter and son-in-law seems to have refused our grandson's efforts to instigate communication. We have instigated communication in the past but nothing is accomplished, and we then are to blame for instigating conversation because it is taken as dictation. We are now waiting for them to start the process that they refuse to do. Broken hearts are the outcome. Are there any old testament laws that would tell us God's will for the way inheritances (under these situations) need to be possessed and taken care of according to His will?
If you have GIVEN the land to your daughter and son-in-law then it is now THEIR property. Yes, I know that it is our responsibility as children of God to use good stewardship with our possessions. What you believe to be correct may not be what they believe is correct. I would leave them be and they will pay the consequences of the property's falling into disarray.