Loving Yourself Thread

JFSurvivor · May 25, 2015

So I know a lot of people have a hard time loving themselves. Not gonna lie...I have a hard time loving myself...so I'm starting this thread.

Here's how it works:

There will be a Bible study and a sharing section. The Bible study will be us studying what the Bible really says about us and the sharing section will be us sharing 2 things we love about ourselves and one thing we love about the person posting above us.

Bible study:

But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. -Romans 5:8

So what are we? Sinners. And what does God do? Love us. So we should love ourselves not because we are sinners but because God loves us.

I wanna talk about these verses:

Psalm 139:13-15 - what does this say about God? What does this say about us? What does this say about God and us?
1 Corinthians 13:4-8- Is this how we treat ourselves? Is this how we should treat ourselves?
Ephesians 2:10 -What does it mean to be a "masterpiece?"

Any other input is welcome as well as verses. This is basically a free for all about loving yourself. You may or may not answer these questions but just please keep on topic. Thanks!2 good things about me (once the next person posts I'll post something nice about them):

1) I like how I'm smart

2) I like that I can help people

Blain · May 25, 2015

so no one is going to partake? Fine then I will. I admit I wish I was much more mature but at the same time I am grateful for my child like heart and mind because it makes it that much easier to connect to God intimately, I also like how much I care and love others even though it eats me alive how I don't seem to be able to love and care like he does yet. However I cannot take credit for either of these things it was all him

JFSurvivor · May 25, 2015

Blaine, I love how you always have something interesting and substantive to say! Usually your responses are very scripture-based and that's awesome! :-D

Blain · May 25, 2015

JFSurvivor said:

Jf honestly I am usually afraid ppl will get upset because my words aren't scripture based, I always speak from my heart-always and sometimes I speak and i'm like why did I say that!?

JFSurvivor · May 25, 2015

Blain said:

Lol just because you don't have a verse doesn't mean your words aren't scripture based. you can say, "Jesus loves you a whole bunch." And those exact words are found nowhere in the Bible but they are true and can be backed up by scripture. From what I have seen of you is that you may not know the exact words of scripture but you get the point of it ya know? You get what the Bible is about. You see more with your heart than your eyes...am I correct?

Atwood · May 25, 2015

I don't think it is possible to love yourself -- not that it would be wrong if you could.
But it appears to me that it is an oxymoron to speak of loving yourself. I say that on the understanding that LOVE SEEKS NOT ITS OWN. In other words, love is that virtue of unselfishly caring for the benefit of others.
But how are you going to unselfishly seek your own?

Eph 5 indicates that it is healthy, normal, & in fact a GIVEN that men seek their own good. No one ever hated his own flesh but nourishes it. So there is nothing wrong with seeking one's own good, but it simply is not the virtue called "love."

People IMHO read "love your neighbor as yourself" wrong. The statement does not say, "love your neighbor as YOU LOVE yourself." People mentally insert words that are not there.
Why not insert, "love your neighbor as IF HE WERE yourself"?

The gospel of self-esteem is a false gospel. Men generally esteem themselves higher than they should. To get evidence for that, take a poll like in school class or college class. Have the students all rate themselves on a goodness scale of 0-10 relative to others. See what the average rating is. I think you will find it way over 5.

So I don't object to loving yourself as we think of it, but also I don't find that "loving oneself" is a problem that needs solving. That kind of "love" is a given; it exists. And IMHO that kind of so-called love, is not agape love, nor can it be by its definition.

I put it to you that you cannot love (agape) yourself.

kennethcadwell · May 25, 2015

We should think of ourselves better then what we do, for God shows us that He created us to do His will.
We were called by God from the foundation of the earth to come to the Lord for our salvation, and see the unfavoring love that He has for us. In turn we are to show that unfavoring love toward others, as we are created and lead to walk as He walked in love, mercy, and forgiveness.

One must first learn to accept His love for themselves and understand that abiding in the Lord we are no longer underserving and condemned. We are told to have confidence in Him, and doubting one self as underserving is to place one in doubt.

James 1:5-8
5 If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.
6 But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.
7 That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord;
8 he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does.

[h=3]2 Timothy 1:7[/h]For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.

[h=3][/h]

Sirk · May 25, 2015

Generosity is a vitamin to your own soul along with forgiveness.

Atwood · May 25, 2015

JFSurvivor said:

How does your theory jibe with Ephesians 5?

"29 for no one ever hated his own flesh; but nourishes and cherishes it, even as Christ also the church; 30 because we are members of his body."

Caring about oneself & seeking one's own good is a given, not a problem to solve.

Sirk · May 25, 2015

I like the premise of your thread jf. Self care is a learned skill and an important one.

MarcR · May 25, 2015

Mt 22:36-39
36 Master, which is the great commandment in the law?
37 Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind.
38 This is the first and great commandment.
39 And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.
KJV

In order for loving our neighbor as our self to have any meaning; it is essential that we love ourselves.

The love that we are called to is seeking what is best for the one who is loved.

What is best for us (or for others) is not always what seems most pleasant at the time.

crossnote · May 25, 2015

Jesus gave us TWO yes TWO not THREE commandments.

1Love the Lord God with ALL your heart mind and soul.
and the Second...
2. Love your neighbor as yourself.

There is no third commandment "Love thyself".
That is a given in our fallen state.

Jesus told him, "'You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.' This is the greatest and most important commandment. The second is exactly like it: 'You must love your neighbor as yourself.' All the Law and the Prophets depend on these two commandments."
(Mat 22:37-40)

It seems if you are doing the first two, you won't have the time or the inclination to be loving oneself.

MyLighthouse · May 26, 2015

1. I like how I attract awesome friends
2. I like that I can empathize with people

- That God crafts us and makes us the way we are, which is amazing and wonderful. Not sure?
- I don't think we always do, but I think we should
- Not sure. But a masterpiece is treated in a special manner, not only when it's created by also when it's done

MyLighthouse · May 26, 2015

Atwood said:

This verse is giving an example to greater understand that Christ takes care of the Church as a normal minded person takes care of their bodies. JF's talking about people who don't have this kind of mind of which don't take care of there bodies as they should.

Blain · May 26, 2015

JFSurvivor said:

actually ya that is correct, actually spooky correct. true I don't know the exact words of scripture but I get the point of it or at least I sure hope I do but what is spooky is when you say I see with my heart not my eyes.

See I know that because of my human nature my eyes will sometimes see a person and not see with God's eyes but when I am praying and talking with God when I am thinking of others when i am thinking and talking to God my motive and reason for becoming strong in him I see the entire human race not with my eyes not with any physical form but as God sees them and then my spirit confirms it, they are the reason. I don't care what the cost is how far I have to go what I have to lose or how severe I have to suffer I am going to see with his eyes and his alone love as he does and with his heart. I am after a love so great so deep that I would be more than willing to suffer even in the fires of hell for the sake of just one person

This actually is something he and I talk about every day, it's a repeating prayer every day only because it is from the heart. Like I say to him all the time I don't need these eyes to see. which is why I am willing to lose these eyes if it meant seeing through his

Blain · May 26, 2015

I actually have a special gift far before I even became a Christian. I am able to make friends with almost any kind of person, ppl who are normally mean and rude I can befriend and they become nice I make friends with ppl who are seen as loser I make friends with ppl who are seen as awesome and popular I make friends with Christians atheists catholics and even ppl like a muslum.

I guess I like this about myself but it's clearly a God given gift to rally others together so it isn't my own

atwhatcost · May 26, 2015

The only problem I have with loving self is I do it too much already.

If Mt 22:36-39 is true, (which it is), then anything opposite of those two things is sin. What's the opposite of those two things? Loving self.

We do that naturally. How often have we done anything without figuring out how it helps us? It doesn't matter what the thing is -- chores, work, school, helping others, landing on the moon, being the first, the best, or even just pretty-darn-good at something is all done out of loving self. "What do I get out of this?" That's self love.

Even helping others makes us feel good, which is the number one reason we do it. Even thinking we're a terrible person is self-love, because what we're really saying is "I should be better than this." (I get that so well, because I'm often angry because I can't do something I really want to do. It absolutely frustrates me that I'm not better than this!)

I don't think self-love needs to be stroked. We got that down good and tight. It's the love God fully and love others fully that's never going to happen without God first loving us and then God taking the wheels for control in our lives. (And, even there, what do we do but fight who is in control of our lives, because God's control isn't as comfortable... on us!)

I know it's a popular trend to love self, but I sometimes wonder if it's popular because it sure beats loving God.

And, this isn't anything against you, JF. This has more to do with how you were trained to think through the school system. Much of what we were trained to do/think through school systems and mass media is intentionally leading people as far away from God as humanly possible.

If you don't see what I'm talking about, pay attention to TV shows in the next week. How many of them have homosexuals? And then, how many of those homosexuals are the heroes of the show or the victims in the show? Watch TV, and you get the general idea that homosexuals make up 25% of the American population, and they are always always right. (I'm so sick of that underlying theme recently, I stop watching a show the second I see it happening. I'm not a homophobe. I really have had homosexual friends, but don't tell me they're perfect. They were my friends, so couldn't be perfect, or... why were they friends with me? lol) We're being brainwashed, if we aren't paying attention.

Question what you're taught in the world, because it's sneaky what they do to us.

Blain · May 26, 2015

You know something I have wondered is how many times God tells us how loved we are how worthy we are to him how we are beautiful yet how often do we actually believe him? I mean if we weren't supposed to think such things about ourselves then why would he say it over and over and over again in his word? Must be frustrating to him lol

crossnote · May 26, 2015

With God's love toward you can you really add your own....?

Or maybe our own just get's in the way?

Blain · May 26, 2015

crossnote said:

well do you love yourself or hate yourself. If I ever am able to love myself it would be because he loved me first not because of who I am or anything. I recall early in my faith I truly understood grace and I could look inisde myself and only see him and I only knew myself as his child not this sinner and inadequate unworthy person I see now. I believe this was a foreshadow of who I was going to be in the future not yet come. Now if you truly are in love with yourslelf and are mesmerized everytime you see yourself in the mirror and are always talking about how amazing you are that is not self love that is self obsession

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