Question, should Christians be happy and joyful all the time?

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
M

Miri

Guest
#1
I went to a small house group this evening, and this subject came up.

Everyone there seemed to think the answer was yes, one man actually
said we should all be happy and smile all the time because of what
Jesus has done for us, we should feel happy and blessed all the time.

To be honest I was thinking “I would like to see how that works out
for you when you are talking and praying with someone who says
their lung cancer has come back for the second time and is untreatable!”

Or “I would like to see if you can continue to smile when you are told your
mum is going to die, go home and we will let you know when it happens.”

Or how about when friends you have known for 30 years ring up because the
wife has had a massive stroke and isn’t expected to live. You go to the hospital to
support the husband and are there until the early hours of the morning because
the husband is so distressed.

Or another friend who just after a few months of getting married, discovers she
has breast cancer.

Or what about if you are threatened with a disciplinary hearing by Work for taking
3.5 weeks off work (the first sick leave in 10 years) because you pull your back
badly and end up in agony with a slipped disc, sciatica and trapped nerve.

I’ve experienced all this and more in the past 12 months.


Anyway back to the small group. I tried to explain that we go through seasons and
even Jesus wept, that there is nothing wrong about feeling sadness, that we all go
through trials and tribulations. I also mentioned the verse at the end how we all
go through things, but they can be used by God to refine, build character, etc that we
were never promised an easy pain free life.


But I pretty much got shouted down with people saying, we just need to pray.
and peace and joy is ours and if we are walking in faith and truth then there is no
need for sadness.

I got a bit mad, thinking maybe they were a bit shallow and weren’t really being
honest. But now I’ve calmed down, I thought I would put the question here to
see what you think. Is it possible for a Christian to be at peace and feel joy
even in the most difficult circumstances. Should that be the gold standard
in our walk with Christ. If you have achieved it, how did you get to that point.





Romans 5:3-5 NKJV
[3] And not only that, but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation
produces perseverance; [4] and perseverance, character; and character, hope.
[5] Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out
in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us.





 
E

Ellsworth1943

Guest
#2
As Jesus looked over Jerusalem, He wept.
So there is a time for joy and a time to weep.
 

maxwel

Senior Member
Apr 18, 2013
9,261
2,386
113
#3
Paul said he'd learned to be "content" in all states.

That is a long way from bubbling over with giddiness.

Although Paul, at certain times, DID display a level of joy amidst hardship that was profound, his statement about contentedness seems to clearly be about simply HAVING THE RESOLVE TO TRUST IN GOD.

And I think the OP is very correct, there are many times it would be TOTALLY INAPPROPRIATE to be all happy and thrilled with excited... like when ministering to those who are very sick and in a place of great hardship. The bible clearly says to "mourn with those that mourn", Romans 12:15.
 

Dino246

Senior Member
Jun 30, 2015
24,555
13,320
113
#4
Miri, does your group meet anywhere near that river in Egypt? You know, "denial"? :)
 

CherieR

Senior Member
May 6, 2017
2,265
1,419
113
#5
To try to appear happy and joyful in all situations is to deny your true feelings and suppress them. This is by no means healthy. Nor is it possible to always be happy and joyful.
 

FlSnookman7

Senior Member
Jun 27, 2015
1,125
135
63
#6
There is a big difference between happiness and joy. Happiness depends on the circumstances one finds oneself in but joy is from God and we can always have joy even (especially) in trying times. I find that if I remember to look at things from a perspective of eternity I will always have joy. I will be with God forever and ever no matter what the next 10 minutes or 10-30 years has in store. That should comfort us when we face tribulation here in this world. We are in this world but we are not of this world.
 

Nehemiah6

Senior Member
Jul 18, 2017
24,167
12,764
113
#7
Is it possible for a Christian to be at peace and feel joy even in the most difficult circumstances.

Well, if the joy of the Lord (a fruit of the Spirit) is your strength (as it ought to be) then you should be joyful under all circumstances, and be at peace in midst of tribulation. That is what the Lord expects.

Of course , we are to rejoice with them to do rejoice, and weep with them that weep. But that is a separate issue.
 

graceNpeace

Senior Member
Aug 12, 2016
2,180
107
63
#8
There is a big difference between happiness and joy. Happiness depends on the circumstances one finds oneself in but joy is from God and we can always have joy even (especially) in trying times. I find that if I remember to look at things from a perspective of eternity I will always have joy. I will be with God forever and ever no matter what the next 10 minutes or 10-30 years has in store. That should comfort us when we face tribulation here in this world. We are in this world but we are not of this world.
This is a very important distinction!
(And thanks to Snookman for highlighting it!)
Happiness and joy are NOT synonymous.
As pointed out happiness is very definitely circumstantial.
Joy on the other hand is something else.
It is part of the fruit of the Spirit and as such should be consistently apparent in a believers life.
One can be joyful when one is unhappy - and precisely only because joy is one of the nine flavours of the fruit of the Spirit.
There is only one fruit of the Spirit - NOT nine fruits - the fruit of the Spirit is SINGULAR!
Nine flavours but ONE fruit!
 

mcubed

Senior Member
Dec 20, 2013
1,449
218
63
#9
My first instinct to the question was yes, but as soon as I thought "yes" the Scripture mourn with those who mourn popped into mind. As humans we mourn over things like death, yet as Christians we have a hope and the Scripture holds true "oh death where is your sting" and we are filled with the joy of the Lord which is our strength because we know Messiah took the sting out of death; those that are saved are alive with with Him and there is a resurrection.
 

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
Feb 21, 2014
70,862
9,581
113
#10
If people were joyful and happy all the time, life would be soooo boring...
 
N

NoNameMcgee

Guest
#11
If people were joyful and happy all the time, life would be soooo boring...
i disagree.....

it would be amazing, compared to the opposite... which is for the most part what i see


i mean

id rather it not be some shallow fake joy because people feel obligated


but the times in my life i was with people who were really happy.... may be some of my best memories
 
Apr 15, 2017
2,867
653
113
#12
Isa 53:1 Who hath believed our report? and to whom is the arm of the LORD revealed?
Isa 53:2 For he shall grow up before him as a tender plant, and as a root out of a dry ground: he hath no form nor comeliness; and when we shall see him, there is no beauty that we should desire him.
Isa 53:3 He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief: and we hid as it were our faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not.

2Co 6:10 As sorrowful, yet alway rejoicing; as poor, yet making many rich; as having nothing, and yet possessing all things.

Php 2:28 I sent him therefore the more carefully, that, when ye see him again, ye may rejoice, and that I may be the less sorrowful.

Rom 9:2 That I have great heaviness and continual sorrow in my heart.

Php 2:27 For indeed he was sick nigh unto death: but God had mercy on him; and not on him only, but on me also, lest I should have sorrow upon sorrow.

Psa 30:5 For his anger endureth but a moment; in his favour is life: weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.

Ecc 7:2 It is better to go to the house of mourning, than to go to the house of feasting: for that is the end of all men; and the living will lay it to his heart.
Ecc 7:3 Sorrow is better than laughter: for by the sadness of the countenance the heart is made better.
Ecc 7:4 The heart of the wise is in the house of mourning; but the heart of fools is in the house of mirth.

Ecc 3:4 A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance.

There are more verses,but a saints sorrow,and grief,has to do with the care of their spiritual walk with God,and the care of others,and not sorrow such as the world has that can lead to depression,and self pity.

Sometimes a saint is sorrowful,and will grieve,and other times they will be upbeat,and happy,which it would not seem like a saint could be happy all the time,for they should have too much care for other people to be happy all the time,for a true saint would mourn for themselves,and others.

But there is a difference between happiness,and joyfulness.Jesus gives us joy that no person takes away,and the joy of the LORD is our strength.

Happiness is controlled by us,so we can temporarily lose it,but joy is controlled by the Spirit,so we can never lose it,which that joy is our strength,for it keeps us living for God,and loving people,despite what,or who,goes against us.
 
Mar 23, 2016
6,732
1,630
113
#13
This section of Scripture came to mind as I read through the thread:

2 Corinthians 4:

6 For God, who commanded the light to shine out of darkness, hath shined in our hearts, to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ.

7 But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellency of the power may be of God, and not of us.

8 We are troubled on every side, yet not distressed; we are perplexed, but not in despair;

9 Persecuted, but not forsaken; cast down, but not destroyed;


...


16 For which cause we faint not; but though our outward man perish, yet the inward man is renewed day by day.

17 For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, worketh for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory;

18 While we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen: for the things which are seen are temporal; but the things which are not seen are eternal.



I also thought about this section:

1 Peter 5:

6 Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time:

7 Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.

8 Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour:

9 Whom resist stedfast in the faith, knowing that the same afflictions are accomplished in your brethren that are in the world.

10 But the God of all grace, who hath called us unto his eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after that ye have suffered a while, make you perfect, stablish, strengthen, settle you.

11 To him be glory and dominion for ever and ever. Amen.



We are going to face afflictions, trials, tribulation in this life. God does not hide this fact from us. And in the midst of our afflictions, God is there with us, perfecting, establishing, strengthening, and settling us. He is working within us during our most trying times to help us. He never, ever leaves us alone to face the things thrown at us in this life.

So, can we have joy in the midst of our most trying times? Yes. But I also think that in those most trying of times as mentioned in the OP, we have peace and faith in our hearts as we face our difficulties.

And I wholeheartedly agree with FlSnookman7 and others who differentiate between happiness (an emotion dependent upon circumstances) and joy (fruit of the Spirit, eternal in nature).

We also have the peace that passes all understanding which guards our hearts and minds through Christ Jesus as we bring everything to God in prayer and supplication with thanksgiving.
 

OneFaith

Senior Member
Sep 5, 2016
2,270
369
83
#14
I went to a small house group this evening, and this subject came up.

Everyone there seemed to think the answer was yes, one man actually
said we should all be happy and smile all the time because of what
Jesus has done for us, we should feel happy and blessed all the time.

To be honest I was thinking “I would like to see how that works out
for you when you are talking and praying with someone who says
their lung cancer has come back for the second time and is untreatable!”

Or “I would like to see if you can continue to smile when you are told your
mum is going to die, go home and we will let you know when it happens.”

Or how about when friends you have known for 30 years ring up because the
wife has had a massive stroke and isn’t expected to live. You go to the hospital to
support the husband and are there until the early hours of the morning because
the husband is so distressed.

Or another friend who just after a few months of getting married, discovers she
has breast cancer.

Or what about if you are threatened with a disciplinary hearing by Work for taking
3.5 weeks off work (the first sick leave in 10 years) because you pull your back
badly and end up in agony with a slipped disc, sciatica and trapped nerve.

I’ve experienced all this and more in the past 12 months.


Anyway back to the small group. I tried to explain that we go through seasons and
even Jesus wept, that there is nothing wrong about feeling sadness, that we all go
through trials and tribulations. I also mentioned the verse at the end how we all
go through things, but they can be used by God to refine, build character, etc that we
were never promised an easy pain free life.


But I pretty much got shouted down with people saying, we just need to pray.
and peace and joy is ours and if we are walking in faith and truth then there is no
need for sadness.

I got a bit mad, thinking maybe they were a bit shallow and weren’t really being
honest. But now I’ve calmed down, I thought I would put the question here to
see what you think. Is it possible for a Christian to be at peace and feel joy
even in the most difficult circumstances. Should that be the gold standard
in our walk with Christ. If you have achieved it, how did you get to that point.





Romans 5:3-5 NKJV
[3] And not only that, but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation
produces perseverance; [4] and perseverance, character; and character, hope.
[5] Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out
in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us.





We are to rejoice in the Lord always. This does not mean we don’t get depressed, sad, or cry. It means that even when we are going through the worst times, we can always at least be happy in the thought of God and knowing we’re going to heaven. Moses was depressed to the point of requesting that God just let him die. Jesus Himself wept, and sweat tears as blood, but I’m sure He took comfort in knowing His pain will be over, and He will be with the Father.
 

Desertsrose

Senior Member
Oct 24, 2016
2,824
207
63
#15
I went to a small house group this evening, and this subject came up.

Everyone there seemed to think the answer was yes, one man actually
said we should all be happy and smile all the time because of what
Jesus has done for us, we should feel happy and blessed all the time.

To be honest I was thinking “I would like to see how that works out
for you when you are talking and praying with someone who says
their lung cancer has come back for the second time and is untreatable!”

Or “I would like to see if you can continue to smile when you are told your
mum is going to die, go home and we will let you know when it happens.”

Or how about when friends you have known for 30 years ring up because the
wife has had a massive stroke and isn’t expected to live. You go to the hospital to
support the husband and are there until the early hours of the morning because
the husband is so distressed.

Or another friend who just after a few months of getting married, discovers she
has breast cancer.

Or what about if you are threatened with a disciplinary hearing by Work for taking
3.5 weeks off work (the first sick leave in 10 years) because you pull your back
badly and end up in agony with a slipped disc, sciatica and trapped nerve.

I’ve experienced all this and more in the past 12 months.


Anyway back to the small group. I tried to explain that we go through seasons and
even Jesus wept, that there is nothing wrong about feeling sadness, that we all go
through trials and tribulations. I also mentioned the verse at the end how we all
go through things, but they can be used by God to refine, build character, etc that we
were never promised an easy pain free life.


But I pretty much got shouted down with people saying, we just need to pray.
and peace and joy is ours and if we are walking in faith and truth then there is no
need for sadness.

I got a bit mad, thinking maybe they were a bit shallow and weren’t really being
honest. But now I’ve calmed down, I thought I would put the question here to
see what you think. Is it possible for a Christian to be at peace and feel joy
even in the most difficult circumstances. Should that be the gold standard
in our walk with Christ. If you have achieved it, how did you get to that point.





Romans 5:3-5 NKJV
[3] And not only that, but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation
produces perseverance; [4] and perseverance, character; and character, hope.
[5] Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out
in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us.





Hi Miri,

James tells us to count it all joy when we fall into various trials and tribulations. But look at what we are to take joy in.

Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

Our faith is being tested and the testing produces endurance in us. That endurance will produce in us the result of being perfect and complete, lacking nothing.

In other words that endurance helps us to grow up in Christ.

In 1 Peter we also read this: In this you greatly rejoice, even though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been distressed by various trials, so that the proof of your faith, being more precious than gold which is perishable, even though tested by fire, may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ; and though you have not seen Him, you love Him, and though you do not see Him now, but believe in Him, you greatly rejoice with joy inexpressible and full of glory, obtaining as the outcome of your faith the salvation of your souls.

Peter also is saying to have joy in the result of your faith being tested. Our faith will be found to result in praise honor and glory at Jesus' return. We look toward the salvation of our souls.

So although we don't rejoice in the torture we may experience or being imprisoned, or the pain I deal with each day or the struggles others have in a marriage, or not having a lot to eat, or not having heat in their home or cooling during a hot summer .........we can all fill in the their reasons for not rejoicing because we all experience various sufferings.

So we not told to rejoice in the pain of it, but to go beyond the pain and rejoice in the results. Paul while being imprisoned rejoiced that many were hearing the gospel and being saved. He even rejoiced that he may die because he knew to live is Christ to die is gain. If they took his life, he'd be with Jesus the very moment of death. What could be better.

In my pain I rejoice because I know that God is growing me up in Him. I know that because of what I go through each day, God uses them so that I will die more to myself and live more for Him. I am drawn to Him more and sit at His feet.

And it's His joy that undergirds all the suffering any one of us may be called on to suffer. In suffering there is joy, not the joy for it. But Paul said when I am weak, then I am strong. In our suffering, when we are weak, then we are strong in Him. Because of ourselves we are nothing, but in Him we are everything, we have everything we need.

God's kingdom is upside down. Think of anything that has to do with the Lord and it's all upside down. We're to love our enemies. That's upside down thinking. It's kingdom thinking.

To be great in God's kingdom we must be a bondservant of all.

To find life, we die to self.

To become rich, give your money away.

So yeah, we can be sad and grieve. We will have times of depression. We're human after all. But as God works on us and we humble ourselves and seek Him, the joy comes even when we have reason to be sad and grieve. It's a spiritual gift to have joy and be able to rejoice when heartache comes. So be real and grieve, but know that God in our sorrow gives us joy for the journey through the ups and downs of life.

In 2 Timothy, Paul says......For this reason I also suffer these things, but I am not ashamed; for I know whom I have believed and I am convinced that He is able to guard what I have entrusted to Him until that day.

I believe that's key to enduring under hardship. We entrust ourselves to Him just as Christ entrusted Himself to the heavenly Father as He suffered.

It is said of Jesus in Hebrews 12:2 fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

The joy set before Jesus was that He would purchase the debt and be the final sacrifice for all of mankind so that whosoever will believe on Him will not perish, but have eternal life.

Jesus wept, as if it were drops of blood. Jesus was in agony, and he didn't want to go to the cross..........but for us He did..........He laid down His life for His friends. But the joy of saving us and redeeming us brought Him great joy and that undergirded Him as He endured the suffering He went through.

So be real, but know that the joy of the Lord is our strength and His joy will hold us up in times of sorrow. The joy is always there and present at any moment.
 

HannahA

Senior Member
Sep 16, 2017
132
17
18
#16
When i'm facing trials, something that i cannot understand, i remember this scriptures

1 Thessalonians 5:18
In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.

Romans 8:28
And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.

Jeremiah 29:11
For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.
 
H

He_reigns

Guest
#17
Nehemiah 8:10
[SUP]10 [/SUP]Then he said to them, “Go, eat of the fat, drink of the sweet, and send portions to him who has nothing prepared; for this day is holy to our Lord. Do not be grieved, for the joy of the Lord is your strength.”



I interpret this last part as saying this. It is the Lord's joy to be our strength in the hard times, therefore we should not be grieved. We may not have to smile or act happy, but knowing it is the Lord's personal joy to be our strength in the hard times gives us great comfort.


2 Chronicles 20:15

[SUP]15 [/SUP]and he said, “Listen, all Judah and the inhabitants of Jerusalem and King Jehoshaphat: thus says the Lord to you, ‘Do not fear or be dismayed because of this great multitude, for the battle is not yours but God’s.
 
M

Miri

Guest
#18
Miri, does your group meet anywhere near that river in Egypt? You know, "denial"? :)
Many of the group there last night were Africans, I think there are cultural
differences as African people often are taught to “just do it and and be joyful”.

African preachers often push the “walk the walk and be happy in christ” sermons.
Then there is the habit if the congregation saying amen every few words etc.

Whereas as British way is the stiff upper lip way. Lol

In fact one person said that it was a forgone conclusion that Christians should
be happy. It just isn’t questioned in Africa. Walking in Christ is the one thing
they can be happy about.
 
M

Miri

Guest
#19
Thanks for all the responses everyone they are appreciated.

To those who agreed with me, thanks for joining me in my misery. Lol

To those who raised all the joy in the Lord type of scriptures, that’s what made me
think again. I know all those scriptures too but I was wondering what the reality of
it was in your individual lives. Have you any particular circumstances you would be
willing time share where you were truely able to walk and act in the joy of the Lord
while enduring difficult times.

Im genuinly interested, because I suppose my first instinct is to throw my dummy out
of the pram and say “great here we go again.” Lol

Ages ago I had an interesting dream from God and I’ve been thinking about it a lot.

In it I was looking at a large piece of paper and there was a bar chart on it.
Down the side were various life circumstances, some good some bad, some awful,
for example, listening to loud music, death, sickness, holidays, poverty, etc

Across the top were various people groups, old, young, men, women, children, elderly.

The chart was measuring how much the various people groups enjoyed different things.
So for example young people enjoyed loud music but elderly people didn’t. Some things
everyone liked, and others no one enjoyed them.

Then as I looked closer I saw one of the people groups was Christians and the chart
showed they enjoyed everything 100%!

I looked at it and thought how is that possible Lord. Then I woke up.

In theory all know what the bible says, but I wondered how that worked out in actual
life circumstances for little old you and me. :)
 
M

Miri

Guest
#20
There is a big difference between happiness and joy. Happiness depends on the circumstances one finds oneself in but joy is from God and we can always have joy even (especially) in trying times. I find that if I remember to look at things from a perspective of eternity I will always have joy. I will be with God forever and ever no matter what the next 10 minutes or 10-30 years has in store. That should comfort us when we face tribulation here in this world. We are in this world but we are not of this world.

Thats an important point, can you elaborate more, see my post above. :)