View Poll Results: Is it OK for a believer to have non-christian friends that are real good friends?

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  • Yes

    66 74.16%
  • No

    9 10.11%
  • Maybe

    12 13.48%
  • I dont' know

    2 2.25%
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Thread: Non-christian friends. What IF your BEST friends in life are non-christians?

  1. #1
    Senior Member GreenNnice's Avatar
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    Default Non-christian friends. What IF your BEST friends in life are non-christians?

    What does scripture say about this?

    There is that 'unequally yoked' phrase in scripture, does that apply just to marriage or should be cut off all ties with friends who are non-christians ?

    Is that like someone with long hair? Should we not have contact with hippies because God says that it is not godly for a man to let his hair grow long?

    Can the Lord lead one into a relationship with a non-christian that is lasting of a lifetime?

    What reasons would this be so?

    What dangers are there in doing this kind of friendship?

    Do you have non-christian friends who are really good friends with you? How do you handle this extreme difference of living life ? Your lifestyle (following not the Lord) vs. yours (following the Lord) .
    What good can God do in this kind of situation, if any ?

    Note: This is not talking about an opposite sex friend that you are attracted to. Just friends you do a lot of things with .
    Without God, we have nothing. With Him, we have everything we ever need, and, more.

    Is compassion compassion at all if it's not based on the Truth ?

    The Holy Spirit leads ALL believers lives, wants to. Are you letting Him lead yours ?

    God bless your days !

  2. #2
    Senior Member peterT's Avatar
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    Default Re: Non-christian friends. What IF your BEST friends in life are non-christians?

    Quote Originally Posted by GreenNnice View Post
    What does scripture say about this?

    There is that 'unequally yoked' phrase in scripture, does that apply just to marriage or should be cut off all ties with friends who are non-christians ?

    Is that like someone with long hair? Should we not have contact with hippies because God says that it is not godly for a man to let his hair grow long?

    Can the Lord lead one into a relationship with a non-christian that is lasting of a lifetime?

    What reasons would this be so?

    What dangers are there in doing this kind of friendship?

    Do you have non-christian friends who are really good friends with you? How do you handle this extreme difference of living life ? Your lifestyle (following not the Lord) vs. yours (following the Lord) .
    What good can God do in this kind of situation, if any ?

    Note: This is not talking about an opposite sex friend that you are attracted to. Just friends you do a lot of things with .
    Luke16:9And I say unto you, Make to yourselves friends of the mammon of unrighteousness; that, when ye fail, they may receive you into everlasting habitations.

    BUT.

    2cor6:14Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?

    Having a friend that’s an unbeliever is different than partaking in there sin.

  3. #3
    Senior Member GreenNnice's Avatar
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    Default Re: Non-christian friends. What IF your BEST friends in life are non-christians?

    Quote Originally Posted by peterT View Post
    Luke16:9And I say unto you, Make to yourselves friends of the mammon of unrighteousness; that, when ye fail, they may receive you into everlasting habitations.

    BUT.

    2cor6:14Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?

    Having a friend that’s an unbeliever is different than partaking in there sin.
    I like what you say, Pete, life is interesting, and, powerful when God puts us with non-christian friends. There is a reason for it, His. Obey and enjoy their friendship in a way that He would see fit. He will let you know. IF you are with Him, it will all turn out good, for your work is being completed with that plan in mind if the blessings are flowing out of that friendship If not, fleeee :O

    You will know your purpose, pray often in that relationship, the bottom line, be yourself and don't stray from God's principles and life for you. Bring glory to Him. Do not hide your light on that hill.

    God bless you, Christ bro
    Last edited by GreenNnice; April 28th, 2012 at 11:21 PM.
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    Without God, we have nothing. With Him, we have everything we ever need, and, more.

    Is compassion compassion at all if it's not based on the Truth ?

    The Holy Spirit leads ALL believers lives, wants to. Are you letting Him lead yours ?

    God bless your days !

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    Senior Member Dude653's Avatar
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    Default Re: Non-christian friends. What IF your BEST friends in life are non-christians?

    Some people feel that their non christian friends treat them better that their so called christian friends.
    I am the one who knocks!

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    Senior Member hattiebod's Avatar
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    Default Re: Non-christian friends. What IF your BEST friends in life are non-christians?

    Quote Originally Posted by GreenNnice View Post
    What does scripture say about this?

    There is that 'unequally yoked' phrase in scripture, does that apply just to marriage or should be cut off all ties with friends who are non-christians ?

    Is that like someone with long hair? Should we not have contact with hippies because God says that it is not godly for a man to let his hair grow long?

    Can the Lord lead one into a relationship with a non-christian that is lasting of a lifetime?

    What reasons would this be so?

    What dangers are there in doing this kind of friendship?

    Do you have non-christian friends who are really good friends with you? How do you handle this extreme difference of living life ? Your lifestyle (following not the Lord) vs. yours (following the Lord) .
    What good can God do in this kind of situation, if any ?

    Note: This is not talking about an opposite sex friend that you are attracted to. Just friends you do a lot of things with .
    interesting question...I think I just remain open to who ever God places in my life! I was not saved until 13 years ago, so i still have friends who remain as lost as me from back then. 2 have now come to accept Christ as their saviour, which is SO exciting. I spent a holiday with my friend K 2 years ago and was delighted when she accepted Christ. Another friend said to us 'Well of course she did, she was stuck in a caravan with you for a week!' well, it's not me that saves, I know that. I am just to live my life as a witness to Christ. I remain friends with non Christians....they are just not Christians yet! Plus, I do not hit them over the head with my Bible either....I know God is the creator & the sustainer of faith. It will all be in His timing. My 'job' is to not be a hypocrite ( soooo hard and to stand firm. I have found my non- Christian friends respect that i trust that they are drawn to me for a reason, as I am to them. All good things come from God, including friendship! If we were shut ourselves away in a bubble, what good would that do? We are to get out there and live, live in confidence and hope! God Bless, <><
    The Lord your God is with you, He is mighty to save. He will
    take great delight in you, He will quiet you with His love, He
    will rejoice over you with singing. Zeph. 3:17.

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    Default Re: Non-christian friends. What IF your BEST friends in life are non-christians?

    I consider how the Messiah Yahshua walked and behaved.

    Matthew 9

    And it came to pass, as Jesus sat at meat in the house, behold, many publicans and sinners came and sat down with him and his disciples. 11And when the Pharisees saw it, they said unto his disciples, Why eateth your Master with publicans and sinners? 12But when Jesus heard that, he said unto them, They that be whole need not a physician, but they that are sick. 13But go ye and learn whatthat meaneth, I will have mercy, and not sacrifice: for I am not come to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance

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    Senior Member ElizabethPeter's Avatar
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    Default Re: Non-christian friends. What IF your BEST friends in life are non-christians?

    My best friends are not Christians. But I really have no trouble. I believe differently compared to them. And I talk to them about God. I really have no issues with that. I'll stand up for God even when nobody agrees with me. Even when I'm all alone, I'll stand for Christ. My friends respect that. And I respect their faith as well. I try to preach the gospel to them, but stubbornness practically owns them. I just pray about it. But we're very good friends. We have disputes and all, but they'll always remain my best friends. There are no dangers in a friendship like this. As long as you're strong in your faith with God, you'll have no issues, what so ever. And, if there's any good, they could probably get saved. That's the best thing that can happen. I hope this helps. God bless.
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    Senior Member GreenNnice's Avatar
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    Default Re: Non-christian friends. What IF your BEST friends in life are non-christians?

    I wish more people would vote on this poll. I think it depends on your life, God is in control, He will use you in non-Christians lives and my best friend of nearly all my life, starting at age 5 is a non-Christian, at least, he and his family and kids do not go to church. But, I know he knows God (went to Lutheran church growing up a year or two) and his family then went away from church and so I just see that my friend knows God but just doesn't go to church. I am not going to judge either, only God knows our hearts. My friend, and, his wife (and kids) all know my stand on God and I stand very firmly on Him in front of them and I believe it's helped their life and their marriage and their kids growing up . The Lord leads

    We are to follow Him, He will TAKE out things of your life that are needing pruned. He's never shown me any true signs whatsoever of my non-Christian friends causing me to stumble or fall. But, the Scripture is with some verses that need heeded on this subject, I don't have them in front of me .

    I am glad the votes are 4 to 1 but I wish there was more of a sample than 5 voters. I think it is a tough subject for some, I agree; I do believe strongly that a non-Christian girl friend or beau is just asking for trouble and I think that common sense tells us that is not going to be the best situation because we will be Christian and we will go into relationship to change them and only God changes people so YOU better really be in agreement with Him on that one or I would not touch it with a 50 foot extended painter's ladder, so to speak
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    Without God, we have nothing. With Him, we have everything we ever need, and, more.

    Is compassion compassion at all if it's not based on the Truth ?

    The Holy Spirit leads ALL believers lives, wants to. Are you letting Him lead yours ?

    God bless your days !

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    Default Re: Non-christian friends. What IF your BEST friends in life are non-christians?

    2 Cor. 6:14 pretty much answers the whole question.


    Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?


    There's a difference with what Yeshua did when He sat with sinners. He wasn't just hanging out with them. He was telling them who He was and what He was there for.
    We are to do the same, but to hang out, like you would other believers. You risk be pulled in to their ways. Which is why we are told not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers.

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    Senior Member Nautilus's Avatar
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    Default Re: Non-christian friends. What IF your BEST friends in life are non-christians?

    My best friend/roommate/him and his sister basically think of me as a brother is atheistic at worst and if forced to pick a religion would follow norse paganism. We just dont let our religious beliefs enter in as a apart of our friendship

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    Default Re: Non-christian friends. What IF your BEST friends in life are non-christians?

    I have friends that I have been close with for 20 PLUS years now...some are unbelievers & some are christians,and I wouldn't trade my life with them & all the things we've shared & suffered,cried,laughed & gone through for anything. If anything God has used those relationships with my unsaved friends to help make me stronger & even if they don't realize it yet...God is & has touched their lives through God's love through me. You need balance in life. There have been times God has told e to let some of my unsaved friends "go"..and I never saw them again. In the same breath,he's had me do that with a few christians I've been close to as well. - and well...who am I to question God?
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    Senior Member Angela53510's Avatar
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    Default Re: Non-christian friends. What IF your BEST friends in life are non-christians?

    I know if Christians had not made friends with me, invited me over for dinner, told me their testimonies, invested in my life, I would probably not be saved today. You cannot be superficial with someone, button-hole them with the gospel, and expect they will accept Christ in Western Society. My best friend is married to an unbeliever, because she married him before she was saved. Yet the Word says to stay with an unbelieving spouse. (1 Cor. 7:13)

    I think that if they are doing unrighteous things, we should decline to do those things. But if they are open to the gospel, or even not, they will never be won unless we are the light of Christ. I have unsaved friends from high school and I go out for coffee, I visit and they will call me if they need prayer. That means they know that God is in my life. I will pray with them, too, so they hear the proclamation of the gospel, as we petition God for their needs.

    I think the Great Commission is what we need to think about.

    "Then Jesus came near and said to them, “All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth. 19 Go, therefore, and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit,20 teaching them to observe everything I have commanded you. And remember, I am with you always, to the end of the age.” Matt. 28:18-20

    If they don't know any Christians, how will they ever hear and see the love of God demonstrated? In fact, my worst problem in life is hanging out in Christian ghettos. I used to be on another forum, secular, and testified daily to the glory of God in my posts, my journals and my emails. I led several people to God, who followed on with Christ. I pray for the others with whom I planted seeds, that someone else will water.

    Be friends with the people God leads you to. And NEVER be afraid to testify because they are not Christians.

    "How then will they call on Him in whom they have not believed? How will they believe in Him whom they have not heard? And how will they hear without a preacher?" Romans 10:14

    God places us where he wants us to do his work - with the lost, the hurting and the broken. Are we doing his will, or just hanging out? Always prayer, and I can assure you, God will open doors to testify to the glory of God.
    Tintin, Allen5566 and MarcR like this.
    "And He has said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.” Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me." 2 Cor. 12:9 NASB

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    Senior Member GreenNnice's Avatar
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    Default Re: Non-christian friends. What IF your BEST friends in life are non-christians?

    Great posts.

    Indeed, Anj, if you had not been invited over (when you were a non-Christian) you would not be one. That was how God moved you, and, good thing you moved

    LIGHTupthesky, same here, a lot of my friends, not just one, are non-Christians. God calls us to be a light and I will shine, and ,brightLy, around all of my friends, Christian and non. And, pray, that some will see the Light
    Without God, we have nothing. With Him, we have everything we ever need, and, more.

    Is compassion compassion at all if it's not based on the Truth ?

    The Holy Spirit leads ALL believers lives, wants to. Are you letting Him lead yours ?

    God bless your days !

  14. #14
    Senior Member GreenNnice's Avatar
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    Default Re: Non-christian friends. What IF your BEST friends in life are non-christians?

    Quote Originally Posted by peterT View Post
    Luke16:9And I say unto you, Make to yourselves friends of the mammon of unrighteousness; that, when ye fail, they may receive you into everlasting habitations.

    BUT.

    2cor6:14Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?

    Having a friend that’s an unbeliever is different than partaking in there sin.
    Quote Originally Posted by ANIOHEVTORAH View Post
    2 Cor. 6:14 pretty much answers the whole question.


    Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?


    There's a difference with what Yeshua did when He sat with sinners. He wasn't just hanging out with them. He was telling them who He was and what He was there for.
    We are to do the same, but to hang out, like you would other believers. You risk be pulled in to their ways. Which is why we are told not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers.
    I think Peter explains how we can very well, indeed, have non-Christians, Anio


    An aside, thx for a lot more of ya voting, God bless you for that, I think it's good for us to see how God is working in our lives and who is against something that you think is right, maybe, even, you might see that there is another side to the story, as pertaining to the title of this thread , that is, for those that voted 'no,' I don't want to pick on you, but I really think we are being judgmental when we turn aside our longtime Christian friends. The Lord leads, the Holy Spirit convicts . We need to just follow Him, He wants NONE to perish
    Last edited by GreenNnice; May 2nd, 2013 at 01:38 AM.
    Without God, we have nothing. With Him, we have everything we ever need, and, more.

    Is compassion compassion at all if it's not based on the Truth ?

    The Holy Spirit leads ALL believers lives, wants to. Are you letting Him lead yours ?

    God bless your days !

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    Default Re: Non-christian friends. What IF your BEST friends in life are non-christians?

    As many other believers here alluded to, my best friend (for all my life) recently accepted Christ, and honestly it's the most jubilant experience ever. Her prior beliefs never altered any of mine, and now that we're both Christians the friendship has this new dimension to it. We can not only discuss academics, but Christ as well!

    Regarding your question about 'Does the Lord lead us into friendships with non-believers', I totally believe that people enter our lives for a reason. It's all a part of God's master plan. Heard countless testimonies at my church about church goers meeting random people on the train/work having a conversation with them that helped deal with a situation they were going through.

    God is powerful man!
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    Default Re: Non-christian friends. What IF your BEST friends in life are non-christians?

    I think its ok to have some non Christian friends , but you have show the best example of Christ in front of them...I mean we cant live in a plastic bouble , I mean Jesus eat with sinners sooo.. makes ya think huh , we cant think ourselves so high up or better than them , that will just push them away ... May God bless you ..
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    Senior Member my_adonai_'s Avatar
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    Default Re: Non-christian friends. What IF your BEST friends in life are non-christians?

    there are non christians that show christian character, that is we can learn from them certain characters that are Godly.

    and yes the unequal yoking is partaking in their sins, that has no excuse. we suppose to draw them into Christ, not far from Him.
    looking2Jesus likes this.
    Joh 15:16 Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you, and ordained you, that ye should go and bring forth fruit, and that your fruit should remain: that whatsoever ye shall ask of the Father in my name, he may give it you.

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    Senior Member OwenHeidenreich's Avatar
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    Default Re: Non-christian friends. What IF your BEST friends in life are non-christians?

    They would become christians because they would clearly see that I rep Jesus' name like no other.


    They would WANT what I INHERITED from my KING because of the way that Jesus' lives his life through me.

    Why would they want what YOU have if they can't even see it?
    GreenNnice likes this.
    YOUR PAST LIFE EXPERIENCES DO NOT SHAPE THE CHARACTER OF GOD

  19. #19
    Senior Member GreenNnice's Avatar
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    Default Re: Non-christian friends. What IF your BEST friends in life are non-christians?

    I pray that, for I have friends who I've known for 40 years him and 15 years his wife, I just pray to God that I am an example He wants and ask Him to give me the strength to be brave around them about Christ, which I am. You guys can guess what I say around them mostly . The Lord leads
    Without God, we have nothing. With Him, we have everything we ever need, and, more.

    Is compassion compassion at all if it's not based on the Truth ?

    The Holy Spirit leads ALL believers lives, wants to. Are you letting Him lead yours ?

    God bless your days !

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    Default Re: Non-christian friends. What IF your BEST friends in life are non-christians?

    Any time we try to follow God by strict rules we get it trouble, and when we try to follow God without listening to those rules we also get in trouble. God says in the Lord's Prayer to ask for our daily bread, and by this He means not only physical food but food for our souls. In Philippians 4:8 It says "Finally brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable--if there is any moral excellence and if there is any praise--dwell on these things." It is easier to keep our mind on the things of God when we are around people who share our love of Him.

    Whenever the people in the OT became good friends with the pagans around them who lived differently than they lived, they would make little changes in their life to be more like them until they became big changes. Just because we have newspapers and running water we are not that much different as people than they were. You can find many OT scriptures saying both to stay away from eating with them, getting too close to them and to be fair and welcome them.

    I don't think we take God's warnings about what we put in our minds seriously enough. Science backs our Lord. Science says there is a portion of our minds that is more like a hard drive, it takes everything we read, hear, and see, and puts it in our brain. It is our conscious mind that sorts it all out, but put enough information is that is not in agreement with God principles and it is like stuffing our computers full of junk. So much for most of the movies and books we have.

    If we don't listen to these things of the Lord we are in trouble. But if we close ourselves off from the friendships God gives us with rules for them, if we hold ourselves away from love of others but only judging, we are in just as much trouble.

    So for each person, it is personal and right for him. He has only to Love the lord with his heart, mind, and strength and others as himself and follow how that leads him.

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