SEVERELY Confused about a few Bible Verses - about Divorce?

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BlackTigress777

Guest
#1
I'm So confused by this bible verse. Of course, you probably already know which one it is. - Matthew 5:32 (KJV) states:

"But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery."

Another version states:

"But I say to you, any man who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, causes her to commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery."

Other Statements:
Mark 10:11
"He answered, 'Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her.'"

Luke 16:18
"'Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery, and the man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery.'"

Adultery is stated in the Ten Commandments, it tells us not to commit to it - therefore, it's considered Sin.

Now, the questions I'm asking is according to the world TODAY - in 2012.

If a man Divorces his wife for other reasons besides Adultery, does this Not qualify as sin? What if he Doesn't remarry?

Also, If that is, why does this automatically cause his Wife to commit adultery if she does find someone better and well suited for her?

Also, If the better and well suited man were to marry this divorced woman, how is that sinning on his part? He cannot control how he feels for her If he's in love with her, but regardless - if he does this, it automatically means that he's commiting adultery, therefore - he's commiting to sin, Why is this?

It's not the Divorced wife's fault that her husband divorced her because (for example) he doesn't like her anymore, or for any other reason Besides Sexual Immoralty or Adultery; so if she does get lonely or so, and actually finds someone better for her - how does this means that she automatically commits adultery, even if there's no possible way of getting back with her original husband because he doesn't want her back?

Even with all of this said, I may just be extremely confused.

Although it causes the divorced wife and a new husband who marries her to Sin (adultery) - because the sin is Caused by the original husband who no longer wants his wife because of reasons other than adultery, does this mean that the sin caused by the Divorced (now remarried) wife and new husband is Forgiven according to Them, but the same Sin is also Blamed towards the original husband and is Not forgiven according to him (unless of course he asks for forgiveness)?

Basically, does the orignal husband take Blame for their sins because He Caused it?


If Not, is the Divorced wife Forced to not remarry or to fall in love ever again? If she does - is it a Continous sin - even though it's intended for good reasons towards the new Husband and Her? Or does she ask for forgiveness for this sin Once because she knows it's a sin - But it's intended for good reasons And there's no way for her to get back with her original husband?


With all of this being said, I didn't even Begin to mention if a wife divorces a husband because of Abusive reasons.

If a wife divorces a husband because of Abusive reasons, and decides to remarry to someone better and well suited for her - is she Still commiting a sin, even though her original husband Abused her?
If so, is it a Continuous sin Because she remains with the new husband, or could she ask for forgiveness Once and could still continue to be with her new loving husband?

I personally figured that if a Husband abuses his Wife that technically they're not Married - Marriage is a loving commitment, and of course if you're mentally and physically giving someone serious harm, then you're not in love with her.

If they engaged in sexual intercourse before, this means that they're now fornicators - BUT, since the Husband (or whoever abuses the other) abused his wife, he should take the blame for it because he never truly loved her since he decides to beat up or mentally harm her.

Do you believe that I may be correct with that statement?

I know I kept on blabbering, but the main question is:
With this statement being made:

"But I say to you, any man who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, causes her to commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery."

1.If a man Divorces his wife for other reasons besides Adultery, does this Not qualify as sin? What if he Doesn't remarry?

2. If the original husband divorces his wife because of Another reason besides sexual immorality and there is No Chance with him ever wanting to go back with her, does he take the Blame for the wife and her new husband's sins (adultery) Because he's the cause of it?

3.If Not, is the Divorced wife Forced to not remarry or to fall in love ever again?

4.If she does - is it a Continous sin even though it's intended for good reasons towards the new Husband and Her? Or does she ask for forgiveness for this sin Once because she knows it's a sin - But it's intended for good reasons And there's no way for her to get back with her original husband?

5.How do you feel about an Abusive Marriage? How do you feel about my statement towards divorce when it comes to it (optional, you don't have to answer this part..)?

If you skipped most of this and are just willing to answer these questions Without reading my whole explanation - PLEASE go back and Fully read it to answer my questions properly - it's worth it. I just really need help with this.
 
M

mule

Guest
#2
I never married -- but for me what is being taught is that you join yourself to another person you are ONE.
I can address several issues -- the first being, the law must not be meted without mercy. I am sure God knows the circumstances, He is aware of the whys and hows. I know many people who marry and divorce over and over again. It has become common in our society.
What Jesus is saying in my understanding is that the bond of marriage is not broken by a bill of divorcement.
( If it helps any God gave Jerusalem a bill of divorcement )
This probably won't make it any easier to understand but Jeremiah 3 starts this way.
They say, If a man put away his wife, and she go from him, and become another man's, shall he return to her again? shall not that land be greatly polluted? but thou has played the harlot with many lovers; yet return to again to me, saith the Lord.
We aren't to take marriage lightly. According to the language of the old testament as soon as you "know" someone you are married to them. Imagine how many husbands and wives people really have. Not just one that we have said "I do" to.
Lastly you have made a vow before God. I believe it is in proverbs that says -- it is better to have never made a vow than to make a vow and not keep it. A vow is not just a promise to the person you are with it is a promise to God.

( abuse -- a man is to love his wife as Jesus loves the church -- he has broken his vow)
 
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K

kenisyes

Guest
#3
Adultery is used in the Scriptures also as adultery with idols. The meaning is breaking a promise of uniqueness. It's mixing of the right of person A to share something only with person B by extending the right to another person C. It is thus not defined as "sexual intercourse outside of marriage", although that is the more common application. It also means sharing God's unique right to our worship with an idol. Think of it as related to the word adulteration. Every marriage is intended by God to be a beginning of a new work on the earth (family, new births, new gifts, new ministries to the world of tomorrow). Divorce interrupts God's plan, and mixes it with another new plan, thus shutting off the channel of blessing the couple has created).

If spouse A divorces spouse B, spouse B has tremendous pressure to fill the emotional void left by spouse A's absence. Spouse B has no outlet, and is therefore caused to share the response saved for Spouse A with someone else C, thus mixing it. But if spouse B is already fornicating, the adultery has already been caused by Spouse B, so Spouse A does not cause it.

If C "marries" B, then C joins the adultery. Jesus is observing, not laying down new laws. So much for the specific statements of Jesus.

The other issues (of today) get much more complex, since I Cor. 7:15 is also operating. Also, we are not under the Old Testament Laws. In addition, we have the custom that a marriage is a marriage only if a formal ceremony is involved. The Bible knows no such custom (I know I'm going to hear it on that statement, but try to find a Scripture supporting the necessity of marriage in a church, or even by a judge, before you say I'm wrong).

These three facts open a wide variety of case-by-case situations. Just because you are legally married, does not mean you are Scripturally married. Indeed, many marriages like you speak of in our day are entered into for wrong reasons by people who are too young, and many are unsaved, undiscipled church members (there are many churches who do not follow the Bible). One partner is called by God after the marriage to salvation or to a real ministry, and the other partner wishes to not be a part of such things. Or one partner becomes abusive, since that partner never knew God in the first place.

Point by point, first, we are not under the old law. We are under grace. The fact that the sin happens is a sign that we need to seek God for a cause and a remedy case-by-case.

Many marriages are not that, and the Scriptures don't even apply.

Some marriages can be set aside because of the salvation of one party, and the rejection of that salvation by the other. I have not been able to find a Scripture one way or the other if this applies to greater empowerment by God of one party. (I know a man who is staying unmarried now, because his wife divorced him over his call to become a prophet.)

When I started answering you, I thought you must be an older spouse going through this type of thing. It is so refreshing to see that you are seeking God for how to conduct a true marriage now. May I add some personal advice that worked for me: 1. In the Scriptures you quote, Jesus (Matt 19:4) says to go back to how it was in the Garden. Try to do that when you fall in love. Wait for that "at last this is a proper companion - bone of my bone, etc." 2. If you trust Him, God will show you who to marry, and then it will work. 3. Wait for not just your salvation, but your empowerment. God has a purpose for your life, when you know it, you can share it intimately.
 
K

killerrabbitrunaway

Guest
#4
I'm So confused by this bible verse. Of course, you probably already know which one it is. - Matthew 5:32 (KJV) states:

"But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery."

Another version states:

"But I say to you, any man who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, causes her to commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery."

Other Statements:
Mark 10:11
"He answered, 'Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her.'"

Luke 16:18
"'Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery, and the man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery.'"

Adultery is stated in the Ten Commandments, it tells us not to commit to it - therefore, it's considered Sin.

Now, the questions I'm asking is according to the world TODAY - in 2012.

If a man Divorces his wife for other reasons besides Adultery, does this Not qualify as sin? What if he Doesn't remarry?

Also, If that is, why does this automatically cause his Wife to commit adultery if she does find someone better and well suited for her?

Also, If the better and well suited man were to marry this divorced woman, how is that sinning on his part? He cannot control how he feels for her If he's in love with her, but regardless - if he does this, it automatically means that he's commiting adultery, therefore - he's commiting to sin, Why is this?

It's not the Divorced wife's fault that her husband divorced her because (for example) he doesn't like her anymore, or for any other reason Besides Sexual Immoralty or Adultery; so if she does get lonely or so, and actually finds someone better for her - how does this means that she automatically commits adultery, even if there's no possible way of getting back with her original husband because he doesn't want her back?

Even with all of this said, I may just be extremely confused.

Although it causes the divorced wife and a new husband who marries her to Sin (adultery) - because the sin is Caused by the original husband who no longer wants his wife because of reasons other than adultery, does this mean that the sin caused by the Divorced (now remarried) wife and new husband is Forgiven according to Them, but the same Sin is also Blamed towards the original husband and is Not forgiven according to him (unless of course he asks for forgiveness)?

Basically, does the orignal husband take Blame for their sins because He Caused it?


If Not, is the Divorced wife Forced to not remarry or to fall in love ever again? If she does - is it a Continous sin - even though it's intended for good reasons towards the new Husband and Her? Or does she ask for forgiveness for this sin Once because she knows it's a sin - But it's intended for good reasons And there's no way for her to get back with her original husband?


With all of this being said, I didn't even Begin to mention if a wife divorces a husband because of Abusive reasons.

If a wife divorces a husband because of Abusive reasons, and decides to remarry to someone better and well suited for her - is she Still commiting a sin, even though her original husband Abused her?
If so, is it a Continuous sin Because she remains with the new husband, or could she ask for forgiveness Once and could still continue to be with her new loving husband?

I personally figured that if a Husband abuses his Wife that technically they're not Married - Marriage is a loving commitment, and of course if you're mentally and physically giving someone serious harm, then you're not in love with her.

If they engaged in sexual intercourse before, this means that they're now fornicators - BUT, since the Husband (or whoever abuses the other) abused his wife, he should take the blame for it because he never truly loved her since he decides to beat up or mentally harm her.

Do you believe that I may be correct with that statement?

I know I kept on blabbering, but the main question is:
With this statement being made:

"But I say to you, any man who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, causes her to commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery."

1.If a man Divorces his wife for other reasons besides Adultery, does this Not qualify as sin? What if he Doesn't remarry?

2. If the original husband divorces his wife because of Another reason besides sexual immorality and there is No Chance with him ever wanting to go back with her, does he take the Blame for the wife and her new husband's sins (adultery) Because he's the cause of it?

3.If Not, is the Divorced wife Forced to not remarry or to fall in love ever again?

4.If she does - is it a Continous sin even though it's intended for good reasons towards the new Husband and Her? Or does she ask for forgiveness for this sin Once because she knows it's a sin - But it's intended for good reasons And there's no way for her to get back with her original husband?

5.How do you feel about an Abusive Marriage? How do you feel about my statement towards divorce when it comes to it (optional, you don't have to answer this part..)?

If you skipped most of this and are just willing to answer these questions Without reading my whole explanation - PLEASE go back and Fully read it to answer my questions properly - it's worth it. I just really need help with this.

It is my FIRM belief that the ONLY reason Jesus said that, was due to men using the Old Testament law as a cop-out to abandon their families, and run off with someone else (especially someone outside of the faith), most likely to "trade them in" for a younger model...there you go, Jesus had compassion for families, and wanted them to stay together...but, don't listen to me, anyone on here, or ANY man/woman/dog/cat/etc--we don't have the right to judge you. God Bless, and I truly hope you work this out with God, and ONLY God.
PS~ How fitting, "Jesus Friend of Sinners" just came on the radio.
 
Aug 13, 2012
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#5
I have thought hard about this subject due to problems in my own marriage. I have sought out the advice of people as well. It is concluded, to me, that there are 2 reasons for divorce: adultery and to be unevenly yolked. If for some reason, let us say your husband, were to leave you and divorce you, he is responsible and must answer to God. BUT if you wait until he moves on, and you know for sure he has had sex with another woman, then he has committed adultery and you are free to remarry. If you have had sex with someone and are not sure if he did or not yet, then you may have committed adultery. This is what I am understanding from asking around a bit. I am speaking to my minister and his wife next week when they are back in town on this subject for my own personal life. So I can let you know what they say then. Or you may seek counsel as well. If this is something happening in your life now, I am so sorry for you. I know these things are difficult.
 
N

nathan3

Guest
#6
Tired wount read all will later. But. there are reasons for divorce. if any sin is involved, I believe Christ forigves all sin, and as a Christian we all should., Repent,. and move on Christ forgives sin. its like your new, remarry, or remarry the former .its all on you, but it can be forgiven.