Parents?

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tryingtofindhim

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How do you honor your parents if they've committed an unforgivable and unforgettable act against you? I mean part of honoring is respecting but, if they've done something evil against you, how do you honor them? I'm trying to live according to the Bible, but I can't find strength to forgive or forget what they have done to me. Any feedback?
 
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ChickenMan3122

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Nov 21, 2009
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You are only to honor your parents until they go outside the word of God and God's way of living. When Jesus says to forgive your enemies it is more for your benefit than your enemy. Just ask Jesus to help you if you are having that much trouble with it. =)
 
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tryingtofindhim

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#3
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ChickenMan3122 said:
You are only to honor your parents until they go outside the word of God and God's way of living. When Jesus says to forgive your enemies it is more for your benefit than your enemy. Just ask Jesus to help you if you are having that much trouble with it. =)
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So if they aren't Christians anyway, I'm not to honor them? That seems weird, but maybe I'm wrong.
 
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ChickenMan3122

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Nov 21, 2009
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No, I never said anything about them being Christians. If what they tell you to do is contradictory to God's way of doing things, then you don't have to do it. =)
 
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tryingtofindhim

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ChickenMan3122 said:
No, I never said anything about them being Christians. If what they tell you to do is contradictory to God's way of doing things, then you don't have to do it. =)
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OH ok, sorry I misread what you said.
 
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ChickenMan3122

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Nov 21, 2009
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No problem. Jesus always has the perfect way for things like these and I don't know the details so take it with Him in prayer. =)
 
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giantone

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#7
#7
Sometimes you can't do much for your parents except pray for them. Other times even if they did great evil but you can safely approach them You treat them much better than they deserve, more so because they are your parents than because anything else. You can also thank God for them because without them you wouldn't be you. But the main thing is do what you can even if it is only acknowledging them as you parents.
 
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wisdomseeker

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Mar 11, 2009
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tryingtofindhim said:
How do you honor your parents if they've committed an unforgivable and unforgettable act against you? I mean part of honoring is respecting but, if they've done something evil against you, how do you honor them? I'm trying to live according to the Bible, but I can't find strength to forgive or forget what they have done to me. Any feedback?
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Peace be to you
Honor your mother and father;This is the first commandment with promise.

When you become a person of God you are born again into a new family.In this family you have a mother and a father.Who is your mother and father?

math 12;
While he yet talked to the people, behold, his mother and his brethren stood without, desiring to speak with him.Then one said unto him, Behold, thy mother and thy brethren stand without, desiring to speak with thee.

But he answered and said unto him that told him, Who is my mother? and who are my brethren?And he stretched forth his hand toward his disciples, and said, Behold my mother and my brethren!For whosoever shall do the will of my Father which is in heaven, the same is my brother, and sister, and mother.

This answers who your mother and father are being Born again.
Who are you biological mother and father?That is up to you.If they are unbelieving follow the spirit in your conduct praying for them to reach God's grace Jesus came to seperate us and blood line has nothing to do with this process.

john;
He came unto his own, and his own received him not.
But as many as received him, to them gave he power to become the sons of God, even to them that believe on his name:Which were born, not of blood, nor of the will of the flesh, nor of the will of man, but of God.

Can your biological mother or father be a antichrist?
how are we to treat people who dont believe in God.

I hope this helps.Look towards God When you read.He is our Father
honor your father and mother means.honor God and your brothers and sisters in God

Love a friend in God
 
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Definition_Christ

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Forgive your parents because God forgives you.

Matthew 5
43 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’
44 But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you,
45 that you may be sons of your Father in heaven; for He makes His sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust.
46 For if you love those who love you, what reward have you? Do not even the tax collectors do the same?
47 And if you greet your brethren only, what do you do more than others? Do not even the tax collectors do so?
48 Therefore you shall be perfect, just as your Father in heaven is perfect.
 
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greatkraw

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Do they see that they have wronged you?

Have they asked you for your forgiveness?

Jesus says forgive others and he will forgive us. BUT if they don't see they need your forgiveness it is better to discuss the thing. Do not let it fester.
 
Elijah23

Elijah23

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Oct 23, 2009
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It is difficult to answer your question without knowing more.

I suppose you have to honor your parents the best you can. If they are mistreating you, then it might be difficult to do so. Just do the best you can.
 
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carpetmanswife

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#12
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giantone said:
Sometimes you can't do much for your parents except pray for them. Other times even if they did great evil but you can safely approach them You treat them much better than they deserve, more so because they are your parents than because anything else. You can also thank God for them because without them you wouldn't be you. But the main thing is do what you can even if it is only acknowledging them as you parents.
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I tend to agree here , when my parent became older and very sick i became his caretaker...i can never forget what happened but he was still my dad and crazy as it may sound to some ..i still wanted to make sure he was well taken care of, i dont regret one moment of takin care of him either :)in fact....im quite proud of that fact
 
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tryingtofindhim

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#13
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greatkraw said:
Do they see that they have wronged you?

Have they asked you for your forgiveness?

Jesus says forgive others and he will forgive us. BUT if they don't see they need your forgiveness it is better to discuss the thing. Do not let it fester.
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Kind of. I've tried to explain to them why I'm hurt by them, but they don't see the wrong in it
They don't really care about my forgiveness, but I will probably never be able to forgive them for what they have/are doing to me.
 
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tryingtofindhim

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Elijah23 said:
It is difficult to answer your question without knowing more.

I suppose you have to honor your parents the best you can. If they are mistreating you, then it might be difficult to do so. Just do the best you can.
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Ya, I'm sorry. What I can say is it is something most sane people would think is horrible to do to a child, but they think its okay.
 
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greatkraw

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I am sorry Ime.

If your physical or mental health is at stake there may be other remedies.
 
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tryingtofindhim

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greatkraw said:
I am sorry Ime.

If your physical or mental health is at stake there may be other remedies.
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Its ok just have to play with the cards life gives you. I'll live; I've been doing it for 16 years. :)
 
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Thaddaeus

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Jan 31, 2009
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could you show me in the bible where it defines an action done by someone else, that God would say that this what they have done is so awlful that you don't have to forgive them , in simple language I don't know of anything that the Bible says that we shouldn't forgive, I see in the Bible where it says that if you don't forgive then the Father, won't forgive us , I see where all sin is forgiveable except the blapheming of the Holy Spirit so unless you are the Holy Spirit which I very much doubt, then I don't know what your parents could have done to you, for it to be unforgivable, and I don't need to know. Forgive Them, draw nigh to God, Forgive them
 
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tryingtofindhim

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Thaddaeus said:
could you show me in the bible where it defines an action done by someone else, that God would say that this what they have done is so awlful that you don't have to forgive them , in simple language I don't know of anything that the Bible says that we shouldn't forgive, I see in the Bible where it says that if you don't forgive then the Father, won't forgive us , I see where all sin is forgiveable except the blapheming of the Holy Spirit so unless you are the Holy Spirit which I very much doubt, then I don't know what your parents could have done to you, for it to be unforgivable, and I don't need to know. Forgive Them, draw nigh to God, Forgive them
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I'm not saying I shouldn't forgive them. I'm saying I don't have the strength to especially since I'm not out of the house yet and they haven't stopped. Maybe when I get away from the situation; it will be easier. I even thought I forgave them and then it came up again and I realized how bitter I am towards them.
 
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greatkraw

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#19
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tryingtofindhim said:
Its ok just have to play with the cards life gives you. I'll live; I've been doing it for 16 years. :)
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there is a theory that God gives us the parents we need

The only reason I do not despise my mother is because the scripture says not to

Coping with my mother all my life meant that when I met someone with General Anxiety Disorder I was able to cope quite well.

I understand my mother's emotional baggage comes from her parents and upbringing.

In turn they had their own issues as they grew up - I could tell you stories.
It would make a great soap opera.

Use God's power to rise above the situation and try to understand them.
 
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machew

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#20
#20
tryingtofindhim said:
I'm not saying I shouldn't forgive them. I'm saying I don't have the strength to especially since I'm not out of the house yet and they haven't stopped. Maybe when I get away from the situation; it will be easier. I even thought I forgave them and then it came up again and I realized how bitter I am towards them.
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Before I start, my intention is not embarrass or accuse, just in case it might be interpreted that way, but to give advice that I feel may help you, because I care :)

I'm not saying that you haven't already, but have you communicated to God that you want to forgive your parents? Have you asked Him for the strength to do so?

Unforgiveness in your heart doesn't affect your parents nearly as much as it affects you. It actually imprisons you in bitterness, anxiety, and anger to the point where it begins to dictate for you, how you live life. From what you have said, it doesn't seem like your unforgiveness is affecting your parents at all and as you said ,"They don't really care about my forgiveness." So by holding on to your unforgiveness you are not punishing them in any way because it doesn't affect them at all. The only person you are punishing by holding onto unforgiveness is yourself. Your unforgiveness will build walls around yourself that keep other people out of your life that God wants to put in your life. It will affect your ability to receive beneficial parental figures in your life because, before they even approach you, all of your walls that you are holding on to will go up.

It is really hard for people who have gone through horrible traumatic experiences from their parents. I recently heard a girl at church share how she had been molested by her parents growing up and how it seemed so hard for her to forgive them. She eventually chose to forgive, and asked God to come in and change her heart towards them. I'm not even pretending to say I can relate to you, I know it is really difficult, and I will be praying for you :)

God Bless,

Machew
 
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