Has your life been one of isolation? Rejection? Aloneness? Not by choice but by divine decree? (Your choice is when you dared to surrender all). Even sitting in the crowd every Sunday morning, Wednesday night, Sunday night, Tuesday night prayer meeting you still feel something is missing. Things like true family relationships, bonafide Holy Spirit fellowship, the closeness with brothers and sisters seems shallow, leaving somewhat to be desired. If truth be told, sometimes you wished you were somewhere else mingling with others that have a more sensitive and loving nature. Where you feel no sense of bondage or dragging on your spirit.
Many would dismiss you as having sin in your life, not as misstep or stumble, but as a career sin. But you know that's not the case.
So you pray, pray, and then pray again.....for years but the feelings never changes. You've had longings in your soul to serve Christ in some unique way, but it never arrives, never ever opens up. You get discouraged and even occasional depression about it but you carry on. Oh if you could just be a part of something bigger, more tangible, more spiritual. You feel you are wearing Jesus out by telling Him about what's in your heart so many times. You begin to question your own salvation. What's wrong with me anyhow?..becomes a staple prayer. Others seem blessed...no hassles.
So you keep on waiting, seeking, abiding, enduring, but nothing ever comes of it or maybe it looks like something was just about to open up for you then....BAM!!....it all shut down....dissipates into nothingness and now you're back in the isolation pit again, a very familiar place, for how many more years, you fear to even contemplate.
Here's a real kick in the teeth adding insult to the perpetual injury...others who have come in to salvation years after you, are walking in the tall cotton of their ministries, doors flying open right and left, no fuss, no delays, in all appearances, they are God's favorites! Just something about you He doesn't like. Something about you is hindering Gods work in your life.
I read a gospel tract when I first got saved titled 'Others May, You Cannot'. I have never forgotten that message for my life has been a life of 'No'. Every endeavor I have set foot to for The Lord in the realm of 'churchianity' has been stopped cold. Don't jump the gun on me with an attack, for I was carrying the bucket of all that is believed by the institution of church for years. Career sins in my life? No. If you think that sin and corruption will cause your ministry to shut down forthwith, think again. TV preachers, the stark example. Lust for power and big money, robbing the poor, fornication, adultery, homosexuality....it's all coming out in the news in these latter years, but they did prosper well for decades before crashing and burning.
Paul's life was about rejection and sometimes isolation. Think;prophets of old. The more isolated and despised they were, the more of Gods revelation they received. I'm convinced that Gods secrets and understanding doesn't come through happy good times but through the hard rock of a life of 'NO' and aloneness. God will give you His peace and love, but there will be some prison time of excruciating pain for those who dare surrender all. The 'trail of tears' is observed by some who are stunned by the vision and refuse to walk that lonely path of obscurity. Only a few will take it on. There's a cost, a price to heavy for most. Only a remnant will surrender this deep.
Yes, that's what I'm saying...there's a deeper well of truth and understanding but only those who are willing to cut and pick through hard rock to get there.
T.Austin Sparks has a word about this. I'll put it up. Only a handful will relate to this, will get it.
I, Paul, the prisoner of Christ Jesus for you.... (Ephesians 3:1)
The measure of approximation to the fullness of the revelation has always been accompanied by a relative cost. Every instrument of the testimony has been laid under suspicion and reproach in a measure commensurate with the degree of value to the Lord, and this has meant that, humanly, they were limited to that extent. Many have withdrawn, fallen away, held aloof, doubted, feared, and questioned. But as Paul could say "My tribulations for you, which are your glory" (Eph. 3:13), or "The prisoner of Christ Jesus in behalf of you Gentiles" (Eph. 3:1), so the measure of limitation in the Lord is the measure of enrichment in His people. The fuller the revelation, the fewer those who apprehend, or the greater the number of those who stand aloof. Revelation only comes through suffering and limitation, and to have it experimentally means sharing the cost in some way. But this is God's way of securing for Himself a spiritual seed plot....
All this may apply to individual lives in relation to the Lord's testimony. There may often be a chafing against limitation, confinement, and a restless hankering after what we would call something wider or less restricted. If the Lord has willed us to the place where we are, our acceptance of it in faith may prove that it becomes a far bigger thing than any human reckoning can judge. I wonder if Paul had any idea that his prison meant his continuous expansion of value to the Lord Jesus through nineteen hundred years? What applies to individuals also applies to corporate bodies, assemblies, or companies of the Lord's people scattered in the earth but one in their fellowship in relation to the Lord's full testimony. May the Lord be graciously pleased to cause the merely human aspect of prison walls to fall away, and give the realization that, far from being limited by men and circumstances, it is imprisonment in the Lord, and this means that all ages and all realms are entered through that prison.
By T. Austin-Sparks from: Captivity In The Lord
Many would dismiss you as having sin in your life, not as misstep or stumble, but as a career sin. But you know that's not the case.
So you pray, pray, and then pray again.....for years but the feelings never changes. You've had longings in your soul to serve Christ in some unique way, but it never arrives, never ever opens up. You get discouraged and even occasional depression about it but you carry on. Oh if you could just be a part of something bigger, more tangible, more spiritual. You feel you are wearing Jesus out by telling Him about what's in your heart so many times. You begin to question your own salvation. What's wrong with me anyhow?..becomes a staple prayer. Others seem blessed...no hassles.
So you keep on waiting, seeking, abiding, enduring, but nothing ever comes of it or maybe it looks like something was just about to open up for you then....BAM!!....it all shut down....dissipates into nothingness and now you're back in the isolation pit again, a very familiar place, for how many more years, you fear to even contemplate.
Here's a real kick in the teeth adding insult to the perpetual injury...others who have come in to salvation years after you, are walking in the tall cotton of their ministries, doors flying open right and left, no fuss, no delays, in all appearances, they are God's favorites! Just something about you He doesn't like. Something about you is hindering Gods work in your life.
I read a gospel tract when I first got saved titled 'Others May, You Cannot'. I have never forgotten that message for my life has been a life of 'No'. Every endeavor I have set foot to for The Lord in the realm of 'churchianity' has been stopped cold. Don't jump the gun on me with an attack, for I was carrying the bucket of all that is believed by the institution of church for years. Career sins in my life? No. If you think that sin and corruption will cause your ministry to shut down forthwith, think again. TV preachers, the stark example. Lust for power and big money, robbing the poor, fornication, adultery, homosexuality....it's all coming out in the news in these latter years, but they did prosper well for decades before crashing and burning.
Paul's life was about rejection and sometimes isolation. Think;prophets of old. The more isolated and despised they were, the more of Gods revelation they received. I'm convinced that Gods secrets and understanding doesn't come through happy good times but through the hard rock of a life of 'NO' and aloneness. God will give you His peace and love, but there will be some prison time of excruciating pain for those who dare surrender all. The 'trail of tears' is observed by some who are stunned by the vision and refuse to walk that lonely path of obscurity. Only a few will take it on. There's a cost, a price to heavy for most. Only a remnant will surrender this deep.
Yes, that's what I'm saying...there's a deeper well of truth and understanding but only those who are willing to cut and pick through hard rock to get there.
T.Austin Sparks has a word about this. I'll put it up. Only a handful will relate to this, will get it.
I, Paul, the prisoner of Christ Jesus for you.... (Ephesians 3:1)
The measure of approximation to the fullness of the revelation has always been accompanied by a relative cost. Every instrument of the testimony has been laid under suspicion and reproach in a measure commensurate with the degree of value to the Lord, and this has meant that, humanly, they were limited to that extent. Many have withdrawn, fallen away, held aloof, doubted, feared, and questioned. But as Paul could say "My tribulations for you, which are your glory" (Eph. 3:13), or "The prisoner of Christ Jesus in behalf of you Gentiles" (Eph. 3:1), so the measure of limitation in the Lord is the measure of enrichment in His people. The fuller the revelation, the fewer those who apprehend, or the greater the number of those who stand aloof. Revelation only comes through suffering and limitation, and to have it experimentally means sharing the cost in some way. But this is God's way of securing for Himself a spiritual seed plot....
All this may apply to individual lives in relation to the Lord's testimony. There may often be a chafing against limitation, confinement, and a restless hankering after what we would call something wider or less restricted. If the Lord has willed us to the place where we are, our acceptance of it in faith may prove that it becomes a far bigger thing than any human reckoning can judge. I wonder if Paul had any idea that his prison meant his continuous expansion of value to the Lord Jesus through nineteen hundred years? What applies to individuals also applies to corporate bodies, assemblies, or companies of the Lord's people scattered in the earth but one in their fellowship in relation to the Lord's full testimony. May the Lord be graciously pleased to cause the merely human aspect of prison walls to fall away, and give the realization that, far from being limited by men and circumstances, it is imprisonment in the Lord, and this means that all ages and all realms are entered through that prison.
By T. Austin-Sparks from: Captivity In The Lord
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