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Struggling marriae

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by , November 4th, 2017 at 10:47 AM (138 Views)
So Im new here, and need some Christian advice on what I should do. My wife had along affair about a year and lied many times and hurt me a great deal. she got pregnant and had a abortion bc I had a vesectomy and she knew it wasn’t mine, we tried to reconcile but he kept popping up in her phone and many other situations. We have seperated and were off and on for almos 2 years, he commited suicide last year and she dumped our 5 kids on me for the whole summer. On top of that I own my own business and I had to get family to help with the kids while I worked. At the end of the summer she wanted to come back around and by then I had started seeing someone. I have a real connection with this other person, but put it aside to try one last time to stay married bc I felt it was the right thing to do. So at this point technically we both have stepped out, but when I went back home, I feel she exhaust me. My house was in complete mess, and with 5 kids I understand it can’t be perfect but there was food every where and no clean dishes at all clothes are piled up everywhere. She feels I have to draw order in ever part of her life and the kids and mine. As the head I get that to a point but, I work very hard to support every one and I don’t feel I should have to do everything. She hounds me about my job and wants me home early every day. She doesn’t respect me or my business, she constantly belittles me infront of my kids. The wants to send the kids away to my mothers all the time and act as if they are always a bother. It’s no different than when I left, she runs off and lays in the bed every night and leaves me alone with the kids. When we were separated I had the kids 4 out of 7 nights. We just don’t have a connection anymore and we have tried counceling but I just cant see the point in fighting for something that doesn’t make me happy. I’m a Christian and raised that way, I watched my parents divorce and have tried not to do that but at what point do you sacrifice all happiness just to keep a marriage. Long post I know but wanted to give as muc detail as possible.

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  1. Ugly's Avatar
    My advice, don't post in blogs when you want answers. Blogs are often not read or responded to. Post this in the Family forums. And use paragraphs. You have a wall of text which will cause some to not read, or not be able to read, your post.
  2. rudimike's Avatar
    2017 November 3

    It is a very sad story, I went trough something similar.
    I hope you are truly Born Again and ask God for help.
    First to do is to clean up old affairs, like divorce and more.
    After that a new relationship is ok. Make sure she is a Christian.
    It is not wise torun from one frying pan into another, also get right with God it is better to ask Him.
    I am a Christian for 35 years have a B.TH. also a ordination as Pastor.
    But I am not affiliated with any denomination, since many are cultic and not to be trusted, trust the Word of God and His Word. KJV is best.
    You can search me at Google under "rudimike" also you can send me your phone number
    by [email protected] or contact me.
    I do wish you all the best rudimike Bible, Jesus, Christ, is a goos start
    Till then rudimike
  3. stonesoffire's Avatar
    I think you know what you want.

    You have every right to a new life. But, if you feel that you should forgive and can do this with the Lords help, for either way we go, we need Him, am sure He will help you. Nothing is easy in this life.

    Something a prophet said in a meeting. He said he would never divorce his wife for another, since he would have to deal with a whole set of new demons. Meant to be humorous, I'm sure, but has an element of truth.

  4. apostleug's Avatar
    remember matthew 19:5-6 in no count will you think about divorce. she hard already regret what she hard done. find a place in your heart and for give her. just help her and lead her to christ. and all will be alright.
  5. tourist's Avatar
    Wife cheated on you? This is a no brainer. The trust she destroyed can never be restored. Consult a divorce attorney and start planning on moving forward. You marriage, as you once knew it, no longer exists.
  6. nddreamer's Avatar
    "Matt. 19:9 And I (Jesus) say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery." Your wife already committed adultery against you. Our Lord Jesus gave us the one exception. She's unclean by her own act. You are free to make your own choice. I"m sorry for all the obvious pain you've had to endure.