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Yahweh_is_gracious

I need rest

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by , November 1st, 2016 at 09:09 AM (253 Views)
I need rest. I am taking rest. I will rest.

Very uneasy this time of year, and I need to do what I feel is right to mitigate it. This means that I cannot be here for the foreseeable future. I know you don't care. I don't care that you don't care.

This site has some positive qualities to it, and there are some genuinely nice people here. They are overshadowed by the throngs of Christians In Name Only that talk really good lingo and can copypasta Bible verses in their posts, but who demonstrate behavior and attitude worse than the militant atheists I know. I see your fruit...and your fruit is rotten.

I struggle with the holiday season. Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years, my birthday, Valentine's Day...all of them. Just a whole bunch of bad memories of very unhappy times, and they come back up to the surface for me to confront year after year and I never get anything sorted out or finalized with them. I know though that I can't be around people talking about these dates or the emotions associated with them without doing even more damage to my already frail psyche. It's just not worth trying to keep some sort of presence on a website if it's going to do me more harm. This place has already hurt me enough.

Maybe once the middle of February passes and I am no longer dreading holidays, I might decide to pop back in and say hello. Then again, I could likely take a hundred years off and nothing would change. The 10,000+ post members would still be accusing every new member of being a troll; young people would be asking inappropriate questions to try and justify their horrible actions; liberals and conservatives will still be at the end of their chains barking at each other trying to show off; people will still be arguing about doctrines that make no sense; there will still be at least one or two flat-Earth or lizard-people Illuminati threads. SSDD.

Yes, a good rest is in order. Maybe this will be the year I'll get some answers about my feelings towards the holidays. I can't get those answers here though.
Fenner, Mooky, Demi777 and 5 others like this.

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