My husband and I have been married for 11 years we have two boys. He was a minister in our church. I was a stay at home mom I home schooled our children at first it was difficult but it was rewarding to see our children prosper in school I felt I was blessed because not many woman are able to stay home with their children. I noticed a change in my husbands behavior this pass October he started to become more distant He started wanting to hang out with his friends more often I thought to myself he just needs that relaxation time. But when I noticed it started to become more often it concerned me I tried to communicate with him but he would just get frustrated and tell me I don't understand how he is feeling and I replied by saying I'm here for you we can work this out together. Then he made the comment one day he is getting tired of going to church I knew this problem was getting serious because he loved being a minister. I asked him are you having an affair and he replied why would I want anyone else I love you and the children. In mid October he told me he needed to get away for a few days I told him no he fought with me about it no matter what I said he was determine to go he left on a Friday night he came back on Sunday afternoon. He told me that he had checked himself into the hospital because he was having mental issues I didn't believe him at first but he had the forms to verify he did go to the hosiptal he had anixtey disorder I said okay we can work this out you can get medication and go to conseling. After he came back home he did not want to be intimate with me anymore he said he needed more time because of the emotional issues he is having. I few weeks later he told me he was leaving but he would be back I was devasted my children were hurt and confused. I kept speaking on the phone to him back and fourth for a week him saying he still loves me and he was coming back home eventually. After two weeks I started to get frustrated and told him I wanted him home and that's when he told me he no longer wanted the marriage he met someone else. It turns out he was seeing a woman he worked with she is 50 years old and he is 36 years her children our grown.
Even after all said and done I still love him I wish I could stop because the emotional pain is unbearable.
At first he was distancing himself from me know he is no longer communicating with the children. Will he ever come to the realization of what he has done and want to come back to me? How do I keep dealing with this situation in a Godly way ? even though he is not living in the household he still pays the bills until I can get on my feet because of the situation he has left me. Is their a chance that he will realize what he has done and want to come back?