Views on Divorce and Remarriage after Infidelity?

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soccermom19

Guest
#1
#1
I would like to know your interpretation of scriptures dealing with the following questions on divorce and remarriage. Please share the scriptures as well as your interpretations of them.

1. Is it biblically acceptable to divorce if your spouse is unfaithful?
2. Is it biblically acceptable to marry someone else after divorcing due to infidelity?
3. Do you believe that God prefers couples to stay married after multiple cases of proven infidelity? Or is it better to separate yourself from your spouse's un-repented sins, i.e legal separation or simply living apart?
4. If you believe in staying married no matter what, then...... How many times should you forgive your spouse's infidelity and take him or her back before you say enough is enough? If the behavior continues what do you believe that God would want you to do about it?

Sincere biblical responses to these questions are appreciated. Question 4 is only meant for people who believe you should never divorce. Thank you in advance for providing scriptures and your interpretations.
 
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live4faith

Guest
#2
#2
Do you mind if I ask you why you are posting the questions? Are you looking for an answer to personally help you? Or just a general topic to talk about?
 
notuptome

notuptome

Senior Member
#3
May 17, 2013
15,050
2,538
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#3
God is compassionate and understanding. There are times when divorce is advisable. Remarriage is really the sticking point on divorce. Remarriage is scripturally a last resort as is the divorce in the first place.

Remarriage disqualifies one from pastorates and deaconships.

Infidelity is terrible and the one who is unfaithful is first unfaithful to the Lord assuming they are truly born again to start with. Infidelity is selfish and gratifying to the flesh not the Holy Spirit.

It is always bad but God is always compassionate.

For the cause of Christ
Roger
 
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pastac

Guest
#4
#4
Remarriage disqualifies you from nothing the only thing that will disqualify us from any office is sin so that is incorrect and Jesus proved it.
pastac
 
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soccermom19

Guest
#5
#5
live4faith said:
Do you mind if I ask you why you are posting the questions? Are you looking for an answer to personally help you? Or just a general topic to talk about?
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I have personal issues that I am dealing with that make me want to obtain the biblical interpretations of others on these topics. I am not divorced nor have I ever been. Therefore, you can correctly assume that I am not remarried. I am in a troubled marriage, but I have never been nor will I ever be unfaithful to my spouse. I do not plan to divorce at this time.
 
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sealabeag

Guest
#6
#6
According to the Bible, it is sinful to to leave your spouse and enter into another sexual relationship. That does not mean that it is sinful to leave your spouse, if you have genuine reasons i.e abuse, or perhaps repeated infidelity would be an acceptable reason.
Now, your marriage must first have been valid or using the Biblical term "lawful" to make separation or "divorce" and remarriage (although the second "marriage" is not a real marriage if the first was lawful so remarriage is not an appropriate term), sinful.

Long story short, if your marriage is a real marriage, you can't leave and enter into a new sexual relationship. Can you leave? Possibly, yes. But that's between you, your spouse, and God.
 
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jjtj22

Guest
#7
#7
Matthew 5 and Matthew 19

1. It is biblical to divorce an unfaithful spouse.

2. If divorce occurs the spouse that remained faithful is free to remarry, the unfaithful spouse should remain unmarried. The free spouse must be careful to only remarry those who are also free in God's sight to marry.

3. The person in question would need to seek God's will through prayer and reading God's Word. God asked Hosea to remain but my personal conviction is that would be an exception for those whose faith and witness is strong and where staying would glorify God.

What does the Bible say about divorce and remarriage?
 
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soccermom19

Guest
#8
#8
sealabeag said:
According to the Bible, it is sinful to to leave your spouse and enter into another sexual relationship. That does not mean that it is sinful to leave your spouse, if you have genuine reasons i.e abuse, or perhaps repeated infidelity would be an acceptable reason.
Now, your marriage must first have been valid or using the Biblical term "lawful" to make separation or "divorce" and remarriage (although the second "marriage" is not a real marriage if the first was lawful so remarriage is not an appropriate term), sinful.

Long story short, if your marriage is a real marriage, you can't leave and enter into a new sexual relationship. Can you leave? Possibly, yes. But that's between you, your spouse, and God.
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Please explain what you mean by a "lawful" marriage. Thank you.
 
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sealabeag

Guest
#9
#9
soccermom19 said:
Please explain what you mean by a "lawful" marriage. Thank you.
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No problem. :) An unlawful marriage in Jewish tradition was a marriage in which the man married a girl who was not actually a virgin, and he was unaware of that. Another reason would be marriage between close relations. There may have been other reasons but these are the only two I know of.
Nowadays reasons for an invalid marriage would be different; for example one spouse withholding important information before the marriage, like having been married before.

Hope that helps.
 
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Human

Banned
#10
Oct 30, 2014
1,150
7
0
#10
soccermom19 said:
I would like to know your interpretation of scriptures dealing with the following questions on divorce and remarriage. Please share the scriptures as well as your interpretations of them.

1. Is it biblically acceptable to divorce if your spouse is unfaithful?
2. Is it biblically acceptable to marry someone else after divorcing due to infidelity?
3. Do you believe that God prefers couples to stay married after multiple cases of proven infidelity? Or is it better to separate yourself from your spouse's un-repented sins, i.e legal separation or simply living apart?
4. If you believe in staying married no matter what, then...... How many times should you forgive your spouse's infidelity and take him or her back before you say enough is enough? If the behavior continues what do you believe that God would want you to do about it?

Sincere biblical responses to these questions are appreciated. Question 4 is only meant for people who believe you should never divorce. Thank you in advance for providing scriptures and your interpretations.
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Ask your husband.
 
V

VioletReigns

Guest
#11
#11
Dear sister Soccermom, you are carrying a heavy burden. You have many questions and have started a few threads along the same lines. I'm so sorry for the pain & grief in your life. You've been on my heart since I first saw your initial post and I am led to say: Cast this burden on the Lord! Ask Him these questions and expect Him to answer.

It's wonderful to have the family of God supporting and helping us. And as the Scriptures say, there's safety in having counselors to guide us. But in order for your heart to be confident in what to do, the Lord Jesus is the only One who can set your mind at ease. He will give you rest!

I remember about 10 years ago I was so confused and conflicted about a certain situation and had family and friends offer me numerous options of how I could handle it. But I had no peace in choosing any of those options. I was in such turmoil, I prayed to the Lord, "Father, I want peace in You above all else. Whatever You tell me to do, even if I don't like the answer, I will do it."

Sister, God is able to do abundantly more than we can ask or think. Our sight is limited to our circumstances and our emotions. But God knows best and sees the whole picture from beginning to end. I thank our Almighty Savior that I listened to Him!! I praise His Holy Name for working things out according to His will and not mine. For in the end, it was His will I wanted all along. He gave me my heart's desire - perfect peace and rest.

I pray in Jesus' name you hear His Voice and follow His guidance for your precious life.
 
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soccermom19

Guest
#12
#12
Human,

It is not possible for me to ask my husband. If it was that easy I would not have asked on this forum.
 
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soccermom19

Guest
#13
#13
VioletReigns said:
Dear sister Soccermom, you are carrying a heavy burden. You have many questions and have started a few threads along the same lines. I'm so sorry for the pain & grief in your life. You've been on my heart since I first saw your initial post and I am led to say: Cast this burden on the Lord! Ask Him these questions and expect Him to answer.

It's wonderful to have the family of God supporting and helping us. And as the Scriptures say, there's safety in having counselors to guide us. But in order for your heart to be confident in what to do, the Lord Jesus is the only One who can set your mind at ease. He will give you rest!

I remember about 10 years ago I was so confused and conflicted about a certain situation and had family and friends offer me numerous options of how I could handle it. But I had no peace in choosing any of those options. I was in such turmoil, I prayed to the Lord, "Father, I want peace in You above all else. Whatever You tell me to do, even if I don't like the answer, I will do it."

Sister, God is able to do abundantly more than we can ask or think. Our sight is limited to our circumstances and our emotions. But God knows best and sees the whole picture from beginning to end. I thank our Almighty Savior that I listened to Him!! I praise His Holy Name for working things out according to His will and not mine. For in the end, it was His will I wanted all along. He gave me my heart's desire - perfect peace and rest.

I pray in Jesus' name you hear His Voice and follow His guidance for your precious life.
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Thank you. The reason for this post was to hopefully uncover some scriptures on this topic that might help me. However, few have offered any scriptures even though I clearly asked for them. Maybe I was expecting too much. I have been praying and studying. I just wanted some scriptures to reference in my studies. Thank you for your concern and prayers.
 
seekingg

seekingg

Senior Member
#14
Jul 13, 2012
152
2
18
#14
soccermom19 said:
I would like to know your interpretation of scriptures dealing with the following questions on divorce and remarriage. Please share the scriptures as well as your interpretations of them.

1. Is it biblically acceptable to divorce if your spouse is unfaithful?
2. Is it biblically acceptable to marry someone else after divorcing due to infidelity?
3. Do you believe that God prefers couples to stay married after multiple cases of proven infidelity? Or is it better to separate yourself from your spouse's un-repented sins, i.e legal separation or simply living apart?
4. If you believe in staying married no matter what, then...... How many times should you forgive your spouse's infidelity and take him or her back before you say enough is enough? If the behavior continues what do you believe that God would want you to do about it?

Sincere biblical responses to these questions are appreciated. Question 4 is only meant for people who believe you should never divorce. Thank you in advance for providing scriptures and your interpretations.
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1-Yes-not basically but Jesus said you can divorce for that reason only.
2-Yes- i though i could remarry so i will have check on this one...
3-Yes- Yes god wants you to stay married. god wants you to forgive him no matter what.
4- but just because you forgive him does not mean you have to stay married. If you truly forgive him that means there is no anger no bitterness no resentment so if you remove all of those things you will probable default to loving him..
 
seekingg

seekingg

Senior Member
#15
Jul 13, 2012
152
2
18
#15
soccermom19 said:
Please explain what you mean by a "lawful" marriage. Thank you.
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no no sealabeag, it is not biblical to divorce for abuse. We abused Jesus but he did not divorce us. The marriage covenant or a contract between Jesus, your spouse and you. Jesus is not going to cheat but if one of the others cheats then maybe he wants out that is why he will let the non cheating spouse out also.
 
seekingg

seekingg

Senior Member
#16
Jul 13, 2012
152
2
18
#16
The marriage covenant or a contract between Jesus, your spouse and you. Jesus is not going to cheat but if one of the others cheats then maybe he wants out that is why he will let the non cheating spouse out also
 
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sealabeag

Guest
#17
#17
Here are just a few Scripture passages on this topic:
1 Corinthians 7:39 - "A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord."

Luke 16:18 - "Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery, and the man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery."

Mark 10:10-12 - 10In the house the disciples began questioning Him about this again. 11And He said to them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her; 12and if she herself divorces her husband and marries another man, she is committing adultery.”

Matthew 19:6-8 - So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.” 7They said to Him, “Why then did Moses command to GIVE HER A CERTIFICATE OF DIVORCE AND SEND her AWAY?” 8He said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses permitted you to divorce your wives; but from the beginning it has not been this way.


Long story short, if your spouse commits adultery (it mentions the woman doing so in the Scripture but we can assume it goes for the man too I suppose), you can separate from them, but you cannot marry again while they live, otherwise you commit adultery and cause your new partner to commit adultery with you.

God bless. :)
 
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sealabeag

Guest
#18
#18
seekingg said:
no no sealabeag, it is not biblical to divorce for abuse. We abused Jesus but he did not divorce us. The marriage covenant or a contract between Jesus, your spouse and you. Jesus is not going to cheat but if one of the others cheats then maybe he wants out that is why he will let the non cheating spouse out also.
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I didn't say it was okay to divorce for abuse. I used the term separate, which implies not living together. The marriage still exists though, making a second one impossible.
 
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soccermom19

Guest
#19
#19
Sealabeag, thank you for your response and actually posting scriptures.
I am now going to quit following/reading this thread because I have gained no new knowledge. Apparently I have located all the scriptures there are on the subject.
Thank you and God Bless to each who answered.
 
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Standingwolf13

Member
#20
Sep 12, 2014
55
2
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#20
I pray that GODS reasoning and HIS truth are endowed into you, and may HE open you up to HIS unfailing love.

The bible states that in several scriptures that divorce is permissible for the act that you have described; NOW since you have asked that question, I would like to ask you a question, what if JESUS CHRIST our LORD and savior decided to take back HIS death and divorce us? As you perceive in your mind your husband has harmed your mental & moral status and pierced your heart, how many times have you done that to your spiritual husband by walking in the flesh and not the spirit. This is what you are describing just so you know.

Matthew 12 25 Jesus knew their thoughts and said to them, “Every kingdom divided against itself will be ruined, and every city or household divided against itself will not stand. 26 If Satan drives out Satan, he is divided against himself. How then can his kingdom stand?

By walking in the flesh and refusing to accept the presence and essence of the FATHER in your marriage you allow Satan an open doorway to creep up like a roaring lion and still your joy.

1 Peter 5:8 Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.

You have accepted the love of CHRIST and because of that you became one with HIM, the same is what GOD requires of us to be in marriage as one in unity. I am not saying you will not have issues, I am saying there is a difference between those issues of the spirit and those of the world.

Sin is of the spirit and Satan gives way to it as fruit, and because of our foundation in CHRIST JESUS is whether the fruit is eatable or not. Your husband may not know GOD or the word of GOD. In times like these if you are going war with Satan, I would want a partner that is sanctified because of my belief and that is a double portion prayer.

1 Corinthians 14For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband.

When you remove your flesh and blood from the equation and look at this from GODS view point spiritually then you will know what you’re up against. Your flesh in this situation is what has been damaged; your mind has been misdirected by Satan’s arrows in an attempt to divide you from your glory in CHRIST JESUS. Get on your hands and knees and ask GOD to show you the destruction ahead of you, ask HIM from the truth speak to HIM HIS bible truth as JESUS did in the dessert. Speaking to GOD from the truth which is the word of GOD puts the armor in place and stops Satan in HIS tracks.

Matthew 4:4Jesus answered, “It is written: ‘Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.’[SUP]b[/SUP] ”5Then the devil took him to the holy city and had him stand on the highest point of the temple. 6“If you are the Son of God,” he said, “throw yourself down. For it is written:“ ‘He will command his angels concerning you,
and they will lift you up in their hands,
so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.’[SUP]c[/SUP] ”

7Jesus answered him, “It is also written: ‘Do not put the Lord your God to the test8Again, the devil took him to a very high mountain and showed him all the kingdoms of the world and their splendor. 9“All this I will give you,” he said, “if you will bow down and worship me.”10Jesus said to him, “Away from me, Satan! For it is written: ‘Worship the Lord your God, and serve him only

Jesus knew how to deflect those arrows by knowing GODS words of truth, there is no reason you can't find them and use them for yourself and your situation.

Hebrews 13
4Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.
 
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