please pray for me

bluecell · Dec 12, 2014

I found out a week ago that my husband cheated on me for 6 months. With our babysitter. Who is now pregnant. I am so hurt and disenchanted with everything. We have 2 sons and I was pretty set that I just could not stay with him. He would've never told me if her husband hadn't told me. It's bad. All kinds of bad. I've been praying so hard. For progress at work so that I could get a raise and therefore if we did divorce I could support myself and the kids. The strength to continue to show him (and him mercy). I am so confused right now and I just need all the prayer I can get.

Michelleks · Dec 12, 2014

It could just be out of suspect. You might be too into your work, and ignored his needs. Trust is most important. Pray for you. Just keep cool. What happened happened. I feel for you. It might not be the truth

kaylagrl · Dec 12, 2014

Michelleks said:

Oh I so disagree with you here dear.If her husband had needs it was his duty to tell her or go for counseling.But she was saying shes trying to get more work so she can support her kids,she didnt say she works too much now.There is never any reason to cheat on a person,ever.That shows his lack of character and immaturity.He is 100% in the wrong.Not only has he sinned against his wife but also his children.To bluecell I feel so bad for you,will be remembering you.I hope you get out of that situation asap.

Talonman · Dec 12, 2014

bluecell said:

You got it Bluecell. No one should have to go through something that horrible. As a man, My heart goes out to you. I will pray for you. You are not alone.

levi85 · Dec 12, 2014

Lord Jesus, we plead your mercy upon them , please Lord Jesus, be merciful to them, Amen

notuptome · Dec 12, 2014

Michelleks said:

Why? Please explain to me how it is her fault he broke his most sacred covenant with his wife?

Are we to love the Lord only when we have things going our way? Did not Paul write to the Phillipians that he knew how to abound and to be abased? Are we to serve the Lord is times of plenty and times of need?

So many today are able to drink only milk and not take meat. Every believer has a responsibility to grow and mature in the Lord. Preachers and mature believers need to edify and encourage these little ones so they grow and glorify God.

The dude took care of himself at the expense of everything that really matters in life. He defrauded his wife and a friend but most evil of all he defrauded the Lord Jesus.

For the cause of Christ
Roger

resurrection33 · Dec 14, 2014

bluecell said:

I found out a week ago that my husband cheated on me for 6 months. With our babysitter. Who is now pregnant. I am so hurt and disenchanted with everything. We have 2 sons and I was pretty set that I just could not stay with him. He would've never told me if her husband hadn't told me. It's bad. All kinds of bad. I've been praying so hard. For progress at work so that I could get a raise and therefore if we did divorce I could support myself and the kids. The strength to continue to show him (and him mercy). I am so confused right now and I just need all the prayer I can get.

I would think that if you divorced him, he would be required to pay child support.

VioletReigns · Dec 14, 2014

Father God, thank You for our sister Bluecell. Lord, we stand with her in prayer and ask that You open her eyes to what You would have her to do. We pray she be blessed in Your perfect peace and that she be granted the wisdom and strength to do what You guide her to do. I pray Your grace would bathe her in peace and keep her in Your love and mercy. Praise You Lord, we give You all the glory and honor for being such an amazing, mighty God!! Thank You for keeping our sister, Lord Jesus!

soccermom19 · Dec 14, 2014

bluecell said:

Bluecell, I will be praying for you.
I am so glad that you found this site in your time of need. About 8 months ago I too had a great need for Christian prayer and support. To make my long story short, my husband has cheated two separate times, that I can prove, in the last 8 months. We are now living separately. But, our story is not finished. It is my ongoing struggle. I found this site and it has been extremely helpful. I use this forum and the ladies forum to vent and/or seek advice.
I was so worried about supporting my family and wondering how we would survive. I was worried about my kids growing up in a broken home. I also worried about the type of example I was going to set for my kids. So much worry and stress! I used to wonder if it was partly my fault. I now know that it wasn't. I understand where you are coming from. My heart aches for you and your children. Don't let anyone tell you that it is your fault. He is the one who chose to break your vows and trust.
My recommendations are to give yourself time to think and make decisions, pray daily and have faith that God will take care of your family (put your stress on God's shoulders), and seek answers in the Bible. Many people on here can suggest scriptures that may be helpful to you if you need help finding some, just ask. I am here for you. Look me up and check out my story if you wish. Message me if you would like a more private discussion.
God Bless you and your children! May you find strength, hope, and peace through your faith in God.

tourist · Dec 14, 2014

Michelleks said:

Please do not make her husband out to be the victim. Two family's were destroyed by her husband's and the baby sitters infidelity. Bluecell - forget about the mercy towards your husband. He needs to leave your house and you need a divorce lawyer.

tourist · Dec 14, 2014

notuptome said:

Why? Please explain to me how it is her fault he broke his most sacred covenant with his wife?

Are we to love the Lord only when we have things going our way? Did not Paul write to the Phillipians that he knew how to abound and to be abased? Are we to serve the Lord is times of plenty and times of need?

So many today are able to drink only milk and not take meat. Every believer has a responsibility to grow and mature in the Lord. Preachers and mature believers need to edify and encourage these little ones so they grow and glorify God.

The dude took care of himself at the expense of everything that really matters in life. He defrauded his wife and a friend but most evil of all he defrauded the Lord Jesus.

For the cause of Christ
Roger

For once we are in agreement.

JesusLives · Dec 14, 2014

O.K. this whole story is horrible, but I don't have enough information to really give any advice in that I have questions and they are not about you bluecell at all. But the questions running through my mind are - What about the husband of the babysitter? Is their marriage o.k. or on the rocks to start with? Do you know bluecell for sure that your husband did this? If you say yes then this is a horrible situation where two families are destroyed. If you say no you don't know for sure and are just going on what the husband of the babysitter told you then again I have questions. Either way you certainly need prayers this is for sure and only God knows the real truth about the husband and babysitter's family situation and the part your husband played in it. You did not mention if you confronted your husband and if he denied or confirmed this story.

Father

I want to lift up bluecell to you at this time and please help her to sort out the truth of the matter and if it is true then please giver her the strength she will need in making decisions that will effect the future of her family. Please help her and give her a support system to lean on help her find a group or pastor or counselor that she will be able to talk to and help her deal with this situation. Father I don't know what has really gone on but I know that our sister is devastated and hurting right now and ask that you comfort her and wrap your arms of love around her as she works out this situation and makes the decisions she will have to make. Give her Your guidance I pray in Jesus Name Amen.

Angela53510 · Dec 14, 2014

Praying for you Bluecell to find the will of God in this matter. Biblically, you can leave this adulterer. And it really says something that they didn't use protection. Perhaps they wanted to get caught?

I know you are in a lot of pain from this betrayal. If your husband won't repent, then it is over. It is also over if you want it to be over! It may be hard, especially financially, but in the end, you will have peace of mind that you won't get any sexually transmitted diseases, and the constant mistrust of wondering if he is going to do this again.

He is totally at fault here. Don't listen to those who would blame you. There is never any cause for adultery!

Mo0448 · Dec 15, 2014

tourist said:

Hello Tourist with all due respect your statement to forget about mercy...come on man...regardless of the situation, we should show mercy and grace its not something that comes from us because no one truly human could show grace and mercy in an instance like that...but God can give us the strength to do so...mercy and grace isn't and should never be conditional...for what if God made mercy and Grace on our lives conditional? I sure as ever would be in big trouble! I'm sure you and everyone else here would too! Bluecell, if you are having trouble showing him the mercy and grace from God, other than Praying, I also suggest you supplement the prayer with reading the book of Hosea in the bible. It tells the beautiful (yet sad) story of Hosea and Gomer. God chose Hosea as the prophet to experience the pain HE was experiencing from the people's unfaithfulness to HIM by worshiping other Gods and not following his commandments. God commands Hosea to take up a woman, Gomer as a wife. She was known in the city as a harlot. I won't get further into it but its a beautiful and redeeming story of love and grace!

Yes your husband did cheat on you I will never agree with what he did and the fallout from him sinning against you and your family is heart breaking! However, even thought he doesn't deserve mercy or grace, its never about deserving but giving freely to all those that need it!

In Christ

Moses

PS: please don't take my comment in a negative light Tourist. I agree with you 99.9% of the time...except for this one time

ChristIsGod · Dec 15, 2014

My step-sister's husband cheated on her with his secretary and then moved in with the secretary. I don't know all of the details but somehow they got back together and they just celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary this Fall.
It depends on the cheating spouse if they want to be forgiven and keep their wife and be a real Dad to their children.
Same goes for this baby-sitter's husband. Neither my step-sister nor her husband are saved but they're happy together.
Same thing happened to her Aunt and her Aunt hung in there for their children.

God only knows!

I pray for you, dear Sister and I am so sorry for your deep pain that only He can help you with.
Praying mercy for you & your entire household.

tourist · Dec 15, 2014

Mo0448 said:

Hello Tourist with all due respect your statement to forget about mercy...come on man...regardless of the situation, we should show mercy and grace its not something that comes from us because no one truly human could show grace and mercy in an instance like that...but God can give us the strength to do so...mercy and grace isn't and should never be conditional...for what if God made mercy and Grace on our lives conditional? I sure as ever would be in big trouble! I'm sure you and everyone else here would too! Bluecell, if you are having trouble showing him the mercy and grace from God, other than Praying, I also suggest you supplement the prayer with reading the book of Hosea in the bible. It tells the beautiful (yet sad) story of Hosea and Gomer. God chose Hosea as the prophet to experience the pain HE was experiencing from the people's unfaithfulness to HIM by worshiping other Gods and not following his commandments. God commands Hosea to take up a woman, Gomer as a wife. She was known in the city as a harlot. I won't get further into it but its a beautiful and redeeming story of love and grace!

Yes your husband did cheat on you I will never agree with what he did and the fallout from him sinning against you and your family is heart breaking! However, even thought he doesn't deserve mercy or grace, its never about deserving but giving freely to all those that need it!

In Christ

Moses

PS: please don't take my comment in a negative light Tourist. I agree with you 99.9% of the time...except for this one time

I do not seek fairness but only mercy and compassion. Thank you for setting me straight.

kaylagrl · Dec 15, 2014

Mo0448 said:

Hello Tourist with all due respect your statement to forget about mercy...come on man...regardless of the situation, we should show mercy and grace its not something that comes from us because no one truly human could show grace and mercy in an instance like that...but God can give us the strength to do so...mercy and grace isn't and should never be conditional...for what if God made mercy and Grace on our lives conditional? I sure as ever would be in big trouble! I'm sure you and everyone else here would too! Bluecell, if you are having trouble showing him the mercy and grace from God, other than Praying, I also suggest you supplement the prayer with reading the book of Hosea in the bible. It tells the beautiful (yet sad) story of Hosea and Gomer. God chose Hosea as the prophet to experience the pain HE was experiencing from the people's unfaithfulness to HIM by worshiping other Gods and not following his commandments. God commands Hosea to take up a woman, Gomer as a wife. She was known in the city as a harlot. I won't get further into it but its a beautiful and redeeming story of love and grace!

Yes your husband did cheat on you I will never agree with what he did and the fallout from him sinning against you and your family is heart breaking! However, even thought he doesn't deserve mercy or grace, its never about deserving but giving freely to all those that need it!

In Christ

Moses

PS: please don't take my comment in a negative light Tourist. I agree with you 99.9% of the time...except for this one time

You can give a person mercy and grace and still walk away from the situation.Infidelity is the one reason God allows a marriage to be dissolved. It may take time to forgive and I agree we must find that peace.But that does not mean a person need stay in the relationship.God used Hosea to make a point but that does not mean God expects us to put up with abuse in our relationships or to stay with a cheating spouse.JMO

Mo0448 · Dec 15, 2014

kaylagrl said:

You're absolutely right and I wouldn't ever suggest one should keep their marriage going even they are being abused, or there is infidelity.

Brody · Jun 6, 2015

I'm really sorry to hear you and the other husband is going through this. I really am, I hope you guys are doing better?

Starsdance · Jun 6, 2015

First, your husband must repent his sin in front of God, it needs a long and hard time.

please pray for me

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