Spritually seperated
- Thread starter mystic7
- Start date
-
Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.
If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!
To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
One of the problems in my country we can easily fall into man-worship, it's our culture (practiced the black arts) I left the church I attended after 6 yrs because after reading the Word and praying in the Spirit, you know a sermon if its Holy Spirit led or man's opinion. Unfortnately they were preaching another Jesus, about their church/original and the pastor is the man of God (my whole clan attended this church,pastor aunties husband). I jioned the AGO when the numbers was small (new kid in the block) But after 8yrs that old tendency crept in again, its was more the Superintendent was right, we must follow his rules. They practiced their version of speakiing tongues by repeating the same words (when you hear them pray in the spirit? its all the same,Holy Spirit Gold Dust?) But with God's Grace myself and others left and started another fellowship (about 80 people) still going strong after 5yrs. Unfortunately wife did not want to follow, wanted to stay at the AOG.
J
Hi, mystic7.
Your situation sounds remarkably close to my own. My wife and I are coming up on 14 years of marriage (our anniversary is in February) and she's basically just done whatever she's wanted to do for the last 6 or 7 years (maybe longer...I've lost track of the precise timeframe). She presently attends a church which is pastored by a heretic...AND SHE KNOWS IT!...or she once knew it, anyhow. IOW, having repeatedly rejected God's dealings/strivings with her, she's now come to the place of DELUSION where she actually believes lies to be the truth and truth to be lies. Anyhow, just a couple of months or so ago, I requested a private meeting with the pastor in which I sat down with him and sought to discuss some of his doctrines FROM A SCRIPTURAL PERSPECTIVE and all that he could do was roll his eyes, flail his arms in the air and slam his Bible shut with steam coming out of his ears. IOW, he couldn't answer any SCRIPTURAL QUESTIONS which I asked him. To make matters worse, our three young children attend this same church and they also know that the pastor is teaching heresy. You see, though, they have a lot of "pot luck dinners" there and events geared towards children and my children even admit that they still go to that church for the same. What's a husband/father to do in such circumstances? Well, I can tell you what I'm doing...not that my own behavior is the blueprint for others...
I'm continuing on in my own walk with the Lord apart from pastors such as the aforementioned one who don't know what they're talking about. I'm also having Bible studies with my own children in which I'm teaching them the truth and in which I'm also combatting error. My wife? Well, normally (like 95% of the time), she gets ENRAGED and basically goes BERSERK whenever I have Bible studies with our children. My response? Whatever...that's her problem and she'll ultimately answer to God for the same one day. I have no control over anybody but myself, so I'm just determined to keep on attempting to do what is right and to hopefully influence others to do the same. My wife has LITERALLY walked around the house at times (as in MANY), with her arms lifted up towards heaven, while SHOUTING OUT:
"PRAISE YOU, JESUS...HALLELUJAH! THANK YOU FOR DELIVERING ME FROM THE CULT OF MY HUSBAND!"
I'm a "cult"? That's news to me and news to God as well. Anyhow, just do your best to remain true to God yourself. In the end, we'll all need to give an account FOR OUR OWN ACTIONS and not for those of others.
P.S.
In case you or others might be questioning why my wife (or anybody else for that matter) would willfully and knowingly sit under the teachings of a heretic, the answer is simply this:
A lot of people prefer what they want to hear (ear tickling heresy) as opposed to what they need to hear. IOW, their rebellion isn't really against those of us who stand for truth, but rather against God Himself.
Your situation sounds remarkably close to my own. My wife and I are coming up on 14 years of marriage (our anniversary is in February) and she's basically just done whatever she's wanted to do for the last 6 or 7 years (maybe longer...I've lost track of the precise timeframe). She presently attends a church which is pastored by a heretic...AND SHE KNOWS IT!...or she once knew it, anyhow. IOW, having repeatedly rejected God's dealings/strivings with her, she's now come to the place of DELUSION where she actually believes lies to be the truth and truth to be lies. Anyhow, just a couple of months or so ago, I requested a private meeting with the pastor in which I sat down with him and sought to discuss some of his doctrines FROM A SCRIPTURAL PERSPECTIVE and all that he could do was roll his eyes, flail his arms in the air and slam his Bible shut with steam coming out of his ears. IOW, he couldn't answer any SCRIPTURAL QUESTIONS which I asked him. To make matters worse, our three young children attend this same church and they also know that the pastor is teaching heresy. You see, though, they have a lot of "pot luck dinners" there and events geared towards children and my children even admit that they still go to that church for the same. What's a husband/father to do in such circumstances? Well, I can tell you what I'm doing...not that my own behavior is the blueprint for others...
I'm continuing on in my own walk with the Lord apart from pastors such as the aforementioned one who don't know what they're talking about. I'm also having Bible studies with my own children in which I'm teaching them the truth and in which I'm also combatting error. My wife? Well, normally (like 95% of the time), she gets ENRAGED and basically goes BERSERK whenever I have Bible studies with our children. My response? Whatever...that's her problem and she'll ultimately answer to God for the same one day. I have no control over anybody but myself, so I'm just determined to keep on attempting to do what is right and to hopefully influence others to do the same. My wife has LITERALLY walked around the house at times (as in MANY), with her arms lifted up towards heaven, while SHOUTING OUT:
"PRAISE YOU, JESUS...HALLELUJAH! THANK YOU FOR DELIVERING ME FROM THE CULT OF MY HUSBAND!"
I'm a "cult"? That's news to me and news to God as well. Anyhow, just do your best to remain true to God yourself. In the end, we'll all need to give an account FOR OUR OWN ACTIONS and not for those of others.
P.S.
In case you or others might be questioning why my wife (or anybody else for that matter) would willfully and knowingly sit under the teachings of a heretic, the answer is simply this:
A lot of people prefer what they want to hear (ear tickling heresy) as opposed to what they need to hear. IOW, their rebellion isn't really against those of us who stand for truth, but rather against God Himself.
mystic7,
I'll pray for you. Is the church you go to fairly similar in belief to the A/G. As far as I know 'repeat after me' tongues aren't typical A/G practice or doctrine. It's a kind of 'big tent' organization where they don't police individual congregations over details like this.
You said something about the NIV. Are you a KJV-onlyist, or just don't care for the NIV? It's not my favorite translation, either, but I believe people can be saved and grow if they use it.
I guess I can understand a wife going to a Pentecostal church if her husband is Roman Catholic or there is some huge gap like that. Here in the US, if there is a church split and the in-laws went from an A/G to another Pentecostal church, I don't think that would necessarily cause a lot of division in the family. The churches would have similar core beliefs.
And generally, I think the wife should follow the husband, in terms of geography, church, etc. if they are a family of believers. It's related to submission. In my own country, a lot of women resist (and rebel against) the idea of a wife submitting to her husband.
Based on your experience at that church, do you think when they fellowship late, they are genuinely fellowshipping with each other until late at night? If they are, and you trust your wife, you need not get too upset about that. My wife may come home a bit late from a women's Bible study or after sharing with an individual there, and I know what she's like and I trust her. We've always gone to the same church since we got married. When we were dating or engaged, she started going to my church.
This is something you may just have to wrestle through in prayer. You can tell the Lord why you believe your wife should join you at church and then ask him to speak to her. But be open to listening to direction yourself.
Another thing you could do, if the Lord directs your steps in that direction, is take a job in another city, move there, and find a church there, away from family, where she doesn't feel like she's choosing between you and her relatives. It's a drastic step, but it may be worth the unity in the family.
I'll pray for you. Is the church you go to fairly similar in belief to the A/G. As far as I know 'repeat after me' tongues aren't typical A/G practice or doctrine. It's a kind of 'big tent' organization where they don't police individual congregations over details like this.
You said something about the NIV. Are you a KJV-onlyist, or just don't care for the NIV? It's not my favorite translation, either, but I believe people can be saved and grow if they use it.
I guess I can understand a wife going to a Pentecostal church if her husband is Roman Catholic or there is some huge gap like that. Here in the US, if there is a church split and the in-laws went from an A/G to another Pentecostal church, I don't think that would necessarily cause a lot of division in the family. The churches would have similar core beliefs.
And generally, I think the wife should follow the husband, in terms of geography, church, etc. if they are a family of believers. It's related to submission. In my own country, a lot of women resist (and rebel against) the idea of a wife submitting to her husband.
Based on your experience at that church, do you think when they fellowship late, they are genuinely fellowshipping with each other until late at night? If they are, and you trust your wife, you need not get too upset about that. My wife may come home a bit late from a women's Bible study or after sharing with an individual there, and I know what she's like and I trust her. We've always gone to the same church since we got married. When we were dating or engaged, she started going to my church.
This is something you may just have to wrestle through in prayer. You can tell the Lord why you believe your wife should join you at church and then ask him to speak to her. But be open to listening to direction yourself.
Another thing you could do, if the Lord directs your steps in that direction, is take a job in another city, move there, and find a church there, away from family, where she doesn't feel like she's choosing between you and her relatives. It's a drastic step, but it may be worth the unity in the family.
Short answer: I don't know, Mystic.
Longer reply: I think that it is important that you are open to one another about your discontents [within your household, not the church(es).] Agree that God and your marriage is above the disagreement. Seek God together in private moments of prayer. Also, seek God to work on your life, trusting He is already working in her life. Pray for God to rejoin your zeal for God as a couple, but ask for God to help you be patient while she opposes a specific place of worship. At the same time, remember that Jesus is more concerned about worshiping God in "spirit and in truth." While God may specifically call you to this or that place (and her also), the Bible does not mandate a specific place for all people to worship.
In short, it is a matter of the heart of the individual and the "heartbeat" of the relationship; it is NOT a matter of where to worship, in the general sense. BUT, if God has called you as a couple to a specific place at this point and time, it is vital that you continue praying for God to remove any planks in your own eyes, so that you may help your wife with any sawdust in her eyes. Your decisions should reflect love, not a demand for shared opinion.
Longer reply: I think that it is important that you are open to one another about your discontents [within your household, not the church(es).] Agree that God and your marriage is above the disagreement. Seek God together in private moments of prayer. Also, seek God to work on your life, trusting He is already working in her life. Pray for God to rejoin your zeal for God as a couple, but ask for God to help you be patient while she opposes a specific place of worship. At the same time, remember that Jesus is more concerned about worshiping God in "spirit and in truth." While God may specifically call you to this or that place (and her also), the Bible does not mandate a specific place for all people to worship.
In short, it is a matter of the heart of the individual and the "heartbeat" of the relationship; it is NOT a matter of where to worship, in the general sense. BUT, if God has called you as a couple to a specific place at this point and time, it is vital that you continue praying for God to remove any planks in your own eyes, so that you may help your wife with any sawdust in her eyes. Your decisions should reflect love, not a demand for shared opinion.
M
To the people in this forum who are experiencing a disconnection with their spouse, i say this, you have already done more than i ever did just by coming and posting in this forum!
My wife is divorcing me and although we are on good terms, she absolutely will not abide anything regarding trying to save our marriage.
No matter how bad it seems, I envy you people who's partners still wear the wedding ring you gave them, mine no longer does. And i guarantee all those issues you think are so important now, if the marriage comes to an end, all those issues will suddenly seem so unimportant and you will be left wondering how you could have been such a fool.
I went through that stage of thinking about my wife having a boyfriend and all the other things and negative thoughts. In the middle of my deepest despair a message came to me... "love thy enemy" I immediately understood, it does not mean my wife is my enemy, what it means is that if i am to love my enemy then how much easier it should be to love those who hurt me but are not my enemy, and when i realized this, suddenly all those negative thoughts were washed away, such power is in those words, love thy enemy, such power, i never realized before.
My wife is divorcing me and although we are on good terms, she absolutely will not abide anything regarding trying to save our marriage.
No matter how bad it seems, I envy you people who's partners still wear the wedding ring you gave them, mine no longer does. And i guarantee all those issues you think are so important now, if the marriage comes to an end, all those issues will suddenly seem so unimportant and you will be left wondering how you could have been such a fool.
I went through that stage of thinking about my wife having a boyfriend and all the other things and negative thoughts. In the middle of my deepest despair a message came to me... "love thy enemy" I immediately understood, it does not mean my wife is my enemy, what it means is that if i am to love my enemy then how much easier it should be to love those who hurt me but are not my enemy, and when i realized this, suddenly all those negative thoughts were washed away, such power is in those words, love thy enemy, such power, i never realized before.