Hesistation on going to church.

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
J

Jak795

Guest
#1
Before I start, I wish to note I don't aim to generalize all churches as I'm sure there are legitimate churches out there that strive to practice the teachings of the Lord as much as possible. But for me, it's hard to see those kinds....

You see, my family and I have had a rough time with going to church. People have judged us and gave us dirty looks, gave us the feeling of not being welcomed. Everyone tried to put on this perfect image of themselves, as if they never do no wrong. These houses of God certainly didn't feel like such a place...

It all felt like nothing more than a big social click than anything else.


Since then, I never set foot in church. I've had a bad taste in my mouth about churches because everywhere I went I've experienced these issues at one time or another in some form. It angers me because this is precisely a reason a lot of people have a negative image of Christianity. Because they see behavior like this going on in a place of love, forgiveness, peace, and fellowship.

Will the Lord still accept me?
 

maxwel

Senior Member
Apr 18, 2013
9,339
2,427
113
#2
It just sounds like you need to go to a different church.

You might even want to try a different denomination.



BTW, if I suggested a different denomination and you felt sick at your stomach,
then the churches you've been to may be a bit too elitist or legalistic.
 
Last edited:
N

newlife7

Guest
#3
I think many of the church buildings have fallen angels posing as Christians in them. Also as far a denominations are concerned they are heresy and the New Testament makes it very clear God doesn't want any sects in His church. We are all to be like minded.
 
J

Jak795

Guest
#4
I think many of the church buildings have fallen angels posing as Christians in them. Also as far a denominations are concerned they are heresy and the New Testament makes it very clear God doesn't want any sects in His church. We are all to be like minded.
I think a lot of Christians are starting to realize that were no longer bound to the old testament.
 
M

mystikmind

Guest
#5
If you cannot find a good church, perhaps you can find a good Christian fellowship/group of some kind?

My favorite Church used to be Hillsong, but they displayed too much focus on getting money out of people,,, i understand tithing is important but there is so much more to God than that,,, and the last time i went, the minister spent more time talking about why we should give them money than he did talking about God.... that was it for me, i never went back. (Churches should be hungry for God, not hungry for money)
 
T

Tswerg

Guest
#6
Here are my thoughts.

I've been in this same situation. I've been to churches that were teaching false information, all the way to people treating like your nobody.
I remember walking into church feeling so alone, just wishing someone would say hi and actually show genuine feelings that they care.
I kept church searching and searching, this is what i'm left with.

Church is where ever you are.
You love Jesus you can worship him ,where ever and whenever.
But yes you want to physically go to church, here is what you can do.
Focus on worshipping Christ and be a friendly face, and you might have to be the one to be nice first even though your the new one.
Sometimes we have to show love first to recieve it back.
But keep in mind you just might need to go church shopping to you find the one thats right for you.

But no matter what your not less of a Christian because you don't attend church.
 
T

Tintin

Guest
#7
I think many of the church buildings have fallen angels posing as Christians in them. Also as far a denominations are concerned they are heresy and the New Testament makes it very clear God doesn't want any sects in His church. We are all to be like minded.
*headdesk*

Where do you come up with this stuff. Non-Christians posing as Christians, sure. But fallen angels posing as Christians? No. Christians are quite capable of being horrible at times. No need to shift the blame to someone else, even if they're the Enemy.
 
C

CRC

Guest
#8
David was hunted by King Saul. But he never blamed God or the congregation for Saul’s actions. Don’t let anything or anyone separate you from God’s love!!! (1 Samuel 24:2-7)


(Romans 8:35-39) 35 Who will separate us from the love of the Christ? Will tribulation or distress or persecution or hunger or nakedness or danger or sword? 36 Just as it is written: “For your sake we are being put to death all day long; we have been accounted as sheep for slaughtering.” 37 On the contrary, in all these things we are coming off completely victorious through the one who loved us. 38 For I am convinced that neither death nor life nor angels nor governments nor things now here nor things to come nor powers 39 nor height nor depth nor any other creation will be able to separate us from God’s love that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.






(Matthew 11:28-30) 28 Come to me, all you who are toiling and loaded down, and I will refresh you. 29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am mild-tempered and lowly in heart, and you will find refreshment for yourselves. 30 For my yoke is kindly, and my load is light.”
 
Feb 7, 2015
22,418
413
0
#9
It is said that if you let a hypocrite stand between you and God, the hypocrite is actually closer to God than you are.
 
C

cmarieh

Guest
#10
It is said that if you let a hypocrite stand between you and God, the hypocrite is actually closer to God than you are.
I agree with that statement to a point. Although, church doesn't really have anything to do with your personal relationship with God. Don't get me wrong going to church helps to fully understand how much God truly loves his children and to acquaint yourself with other believers.
 
Jul 9, 2014
112
15
18
#11
Wille-T can you please explain what you mean, I don't understand it...Sorry... Second I come of in the same situation, as trying to find a church. I have been to a couple churches. The once church I went to was a small cramped church, a couple people in their friendly and accepting, but the message put me off, it was all about voting for who the pastor wanted us to vote for. Second, I had two encounters with the second church, first encounter I was very young not understand, and they preached all the time about the rapture, and basically forced feed it to us. Second encounter, different location, only there to give blood. (yes i know not to boast but it didn't happen either way since I had a Dr. pepper and my pulse was way too high.' But one of the people seem to just stare like I was unwanted, I wasn't suppose to be there...
 
Apr 10, 2015
169
2
0
#12
Before I start, I wish to note I don't aim to generalize all churches as I'm sure there are legitimate churches out there that strive to practice the teachings of the Lord as much as possible. But for me, it's hard to see those kinds....

You see, my family and I have had a rough time with going to church. People have judged us and gave us dirty looks, gave us the feeling of not being welcomed. Everyone tried to put on this perfect image of themselves, as if they never do no wrong. These houses of God certainly didn't feel like such a place...

It all felt like nothing more than a big social click than anything else.


Since then, I never set foot in church. I've had a bad taste in my mouth about churches because everywhere I went I've experienced these issues at one time or another in some form. It angers me because this is precisely a reason a lot of people have a negative image of Christianity. Because they see behavior like this going on in a place of love, forgiveness, peace, and fellowship.

Will the Lord still accept me?
church begins in the heart.

i feel the exact same way about church so you are not alone brother. have you searced for a more evangelistic non traditional type church in your area

why is everyone looking at and judging your family?

God bless
 
Dec 1, 2014
1,430
27
0
#13
Please do not forsake the 'gathering of yourselves together'. as we are commanded. Do not allow the condenscention of others keep your spiritual walk lacking. Pray, seek a BIBLE believing congregation that allows the Holy Spirit to be part of the worship service. I had to leave my home church of over 25 years due to gossip, descention and worse. To this day, my old home church in which my dad was a former pastor there, is a TOMBSTONE CHURCH. Let's face it....basically there are 2 kinds of churches: the Happy/Clappy & the Frozen/Chosen. I am so glad that I left my old 'comfort zoned" church. I have grown spiritually and I enjoy the fresh different worship style that I was missing. Personally, I would lean more toward evangelical or pentacostal denominations instead of the old traditional litergical dusty stained glassed towered gothic spired buildings. lol
 

JFSurvivor

Senior Member
Jan 20, 2015
1,184
25
0
#14
Before I start, I wish to note I don't aim to generalize all churches as I'm sure there are legitimate churches out there that strive to practice the teachings of the Lord as much as possible. But for me, it's hard to see those kinds....

You see, my family and I have had a rough time with going to church. People have judged us and gave us dirty looks, gave us the feeling of not being welcomed. Everyone tried to put on this perfect image of themselves, as if they never do no wrong. These houses of God certainly didn't feel like such a place...

It all felt like nothing more than a big social click than anything else.


Since then, I never set foot in church. I've had a bad taste in my mouth about churches because everywhere I went I've experienced these issues at one time or another in some form. It angers me because this is precisely a reason a lot of people have a negative image of Christianity. Because they see behavior like this going on in a place of love, forgiveness, peace, and fellowship.

Will the Lord still accept me?
Yes the Lord will still accept you. I have been in the same situation. Just work on your relationship with God on your own for now and if He decides to place you in a church, He will and it will be a good one too. So don't sweat it. I had plenty of people quote to me that hebrews verse but a lot of them were people who didn't really care about me. God knows your heart and he knows YOU. So don't worry. :)
 

Angela53510

Senior Member
Jan 24, 2011
11,780
2,943
113
#15
Remember that churches are full of imperfect people. That is because we are just sinners saved by grace.

I will also say, did someone at that church actually SAY something to you about not being good enough for their church? If they did, you were right to leave. But if no one said anything, it is possible you were reading into their gestures something that had nothing to do with you.

I was in a small group with a woman, and she said all the women in the church rejected her, because she could not come to the Thursday morning ladies group because of work. Except she was related to some of the women, and we had lots of working women in the church. The next Sunday, I was in the rest room with two ladies from this group who were deeply engaged in a conversation with each other. I tried to say hello, but it was obvious they were sorting out the situation in the world.

Now, I could have interpreted this as them not liking me, or putting me down. Instead, I chose to interpret it as those two women having a conversation that engrossed them, whatever the content.

I think you need to look around for another church. Although your salvation does not depend on going to church, I do believe our development in character into mature Christians does.

If you cannot get along in community, you are missing a big part of the gospel. The gospel is about community, not just individual salvation. Iron sharpens iron, and when we interact with other people we learn and grow. And sometimes that means hurting, and sometimes that means being encouraged or comforted. You simply cannot obey the Bible outside of community.

PS. Lots of Scriptures on this spring to mind, but this is not the BDF. But I can post them, if anyone wants.
 
Feb 7, 2015
22,418
413
0
#16
Wille-T can you please explain what you mean, I don't understand it...Sorry... Second I come of in the same situation, as trying to find a church. I have been to a couple churches. The once church I went to was a small cramped church, a couple people in their friendly and accepting, but the message put me off, it was all about voting for who the pastor wanted us to vote for. Second, I had two encounters with the second church, first encounter I was very young not understand, and they preached all the time about the rapture, and basically forced feed it to us. Second encounter, different location, only there to give blood. (yes i know not to boast but it didn't happen either way since I had a Dr. pepper and my pulse was way too high.' But one of the people seem to just stare like I was unwanted, I wasn't suppose to be there...
My point is...... Some do, some don't, so what? There are more than 600 churches in my area, alone. If one doesn't fit you, then don't make a big deal of it, simply move on down the road, and try another one. We have no call to be blaming someone at a particular church for "turning us off to God."
 
Jul 9, 2014
112
15
18
#17
Thank you for the time Willie-T, second stupid question on the other hand were you or have you ever been associate or affliate with the vineyard church?
 
E

Elysian

Guest
#18
Christian titheing was apperently started by the Wesley church about 100 yrs ago when they were experiencing financial difficulty.Titheing is O.T and it is questionable if Christians are even bound to it.We are not supposed to give under compulsion and then only to the poor.

I have had a lot to do with AOG churches in W.A and they are incredibly tithe orientated to the point that I began to question if I was in the right place.
We no longer tithe as such but give money to needy causes as we can see where it goes.
If you want to research this practice further and other topics regarding ''Churchianity'' visit ''CREATION LIBERTY''. This website focuses on biblical Christianity, although I do not agree with a very small percentage of their imfomation I find it a good Christ serving Christian site,which is rare these days.
 
Last edited by a moderator:

Violet24

Senior Member
Apr 14, 2015
1,074
148
63
#19
Where the spirit of the Lord is.....peace. I have realized through attending different churches over the years that there are "no perfect" church, with that said I know from my own personal experience in attending new churches is that some members can simply have the wrong approach or simply make your visit there seem rather awkward, while others can simply make you feel that Jesus is right there in your mist. My prayer is always for the Lord to help me feel the unity so I can grow with other believers in Christ.
 
J

Jak795

Guest
#20
church begins in the heart.

i feel the exact same way about church so you are not alone brother. have you searced for a more evangelistic non traditional type church in your area

why is everyone looking at and judging your family?


God bless
Because we came from a different background of church life. We did things differently that they frowned on or weren't used to. Though we behaved and tried to do right by the church. We were still judged and rejected.