I tell my daughter that boys have cooties

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Feb 18, 2010
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#21
I'm terrified of all the trouble my daughter could get into (drugs, unprotected sex, violence, spreading evil speech about others, racism, hatred of people who are of different religion, sex, economic background, sexual orientation, etc.)

Sure, I'll do my best to teach her in the way of the Lord to do tzedekah and mishpat (justice and righteousness) and learn her to love God, and love others as herself, but man oh man, the thought of what could go wrong...terrifying.

Yes, I can't shelter her forever. I can't hide her from the world. She will have to venture out on her own. She will have to heed the call "lech lecha" (go for yourself) as Abram did. I can't prevent her from living her life. And she will make whatever choices she's going to make, whether for good or ill. Hopefully for good, but sometimes people need to learn from bad choices.

It's just that she's so young (4 months) and precious and so full of promise and how badly I want to keep her from being "polluted by the world."

Any other parents out there that feel this way (or did?) Or am I just looney. :)
If I ever had a daughter I wouldn't give her the traditional sex talk. It doesn't help anything. I know from second-hand experience. Plus if you treat the subject as a bit touchy and tip-toe around it they'll be less apt to respect you and your opinion. I'd probably just tell my daughter, "You're not stupid. You're an intelligent woman. If he tries anything, give him a swift kick in the crotch for your old man. High heels are the best birth control."
 
H

Harley_Angel

Guest
#22
Lol, Humble. A chastity belt was a device used a long time ago particularly by nobles and soldiers who wanted to ensure their wives/daughters chastity while they were gone. It would insure there would be no temptation. Unfortunately they have been adapted into adult fetish play, so yes, you need to be careful at what you look at. But just to sate your curiosity withut having to look, basically it was a like a pair of metal underwear with a simple lock on it and holes to faciitate biological processes.
 
M

Mordred

Guest
#23
Dear Sir or Madam;

I think the best way you can involve your daughter in the Christian community is to continue with her involvement with your Church's youth group. It may be a solid option for you.
 
M

Mal316

Guest
#24
Thank you all for your posts. :)

I am not getting a chastity belt for my daughter. I think that's just silly. High heels may be good protection though, lol.

Self respect is also a good defense. A person who values her worth as a human being, as a daughter of God, as a holy vessel is (IMO) less likely to sin sexually than one who wants to "fit in" with the popular crowd. I'm not talking about defense against physical attacks, but against those who would attempt to pressure her into having sex by saying "all the cool kids are doing it." Or by bragging about their sexual exploits. Or by talking about how much fun it is.

I think this is where building self-esteem plays a big role. Encourage her to do right, praise her when she does, warn her against sin, punish when necessary, but never let her doubt my love.

Certainly there is the obligation of parents to instruct their children in God's Word (Deut 6:7). And why is knowledge of Scripture important? 2 Timothy 3:16-17 gives a few reasons. Also, if we look at the temptation of Jesus in the wilderness, notice how he resisted the temptation. What did he say, "It is written...." That is, he quoted Scriptures. It's not just knowing verses, however, lots of people can quote verses, it's about being able to apply them. It's not just carrying a Bible with you it's about living out the words.

Thanks for y'alls input! :D
 
C

carpetmanswife

Guest
#25
I'm terrified of all the trouble my daughter could get into (drugs, unprotected sex, violence, spreading evil speech about others, racism, hatred of people who are of different religion, sex, economic background, sexual orientation, etc.)

Sure, I'll do my best to teach her in the way of the Lord to do tzedekah and mishpat (justice and righteousness) and learn her to love God, and love others as herself, but man oh man, the thought of what could go wrong...terrifying.

Yes, I can't shelter her forever. I can't hide her from the world. She will have to venture out on her own. She will have to heed the call "lech lecha" (go for yourself) as Abram did. I can't prevent her from living her life. And she will make whatever choices she's going to make, whether for good or ill. Hopefully for good, but sometimes people need to learn from bad choices.

It's just that she's so young (4 months) and precious and so full of promise and how badly I want to keep her from being "polluted by the world."

Any other parents out there that feel this way (or did?) Or am I just looney. :)
completely normal...i did that with my son and now with my grandaughters
 
N

NoTearsShed

Guest
#26
Im not a parent but i know the feeling,
Heres some advice NEVER let anyone change your daughters diaper or take care of your daughter unless they are someone you REALLY REALLY REALLY trust,
Like your mom or her dad (to take care of her) Or your sister,
Dont let just any stranger or day care take care of her,
NOT trying to scare you but i heard real life stories a long with read many real life stories about babies, kids & teenagers getting raped, molested or touched especially by someone the family knew or trusted.

example my EX boyfriend got raped & molested by his sister friend( i forgot if she was her best friend or just friend.) She used to baby sit him & well that happend... more than once.... :(
Then theres my boyfriend brother whose NASTY Uncles WIFE sucked his balls... as a baby! I know DISGUSTING.
I pray that God may bring to justice to those evil people, & may he protect other babys.
NOT trying to scare you but id like for parents to be more aware that much rape & molestation goes on in the world than we know of.
SO please be careful & shes soo tiny *-* Congrats on your new baby =D you got a while to go for her to grow up, time goes by fast when you look back Make every moment worth it.
Its best you let her grow up in the church life & being told about God =D
Also of course pray for her =D

If you want some advice for when she is a teenager heres some =)
Coming from a teenager almost FULL adult im 19 unless you count me old already then :(

But if she wants to go to the store with a friend or two let her go =) as long as you & her have a trust bond meaning she knows not to lie to you & you trust her =D or if possible you take them to the store & you can go to the older women section(or whatever other section of the store you want or need to go to) while they go to the kids or teenagers section =) I used to do that with my mom & old besties (best friend) when i was like 14-16
My mom knew i was not a party without permission or at a guys house or something & she was close by =)

If you keep your daughter from going even to the store to go shop that might make them feel like prisoners & end up sneaking out or keeping things from you...

Be a parent & friend at the same time, like if she ever tells you she likes a guy talk to her about it & dont get mad because when most parents get mad at their daughter for liking a guy the kids shut off from telling the parents things & end up lying to them.
My mom knows about me & my boyfriend & knows that i know "sex before marriage is a BIG BIG NO NO" & that i have fear of God =D
So we have a trust bond =)

Kids or teenagers who dont have fear for God or believe in God or are closer to God are most likely to act up or mess up in life than those who are closer to God, read the bible, pray , Go to church or/and are close to their parents =)
 
N

NoTearsShed

Guest
#27
Thank you all for your posts. :)

I am not getting a chastity belt for my daughter. I think that's just silly. High heels may be good protection though, lol.

Self respect is also a good defense. A person who values her worth as a human being, as a daughter of God, as a holy vessel is (IMO) less likely to sin sexually than one who wants to "fit in" with the popular crowd. I'm not talking about defense against physical attacks, but against those who would attempt to pressure her into having sex by saying "all the cool kids are doing it." Or by bragging about their sexual exploits. Or by talking about how much fun it is.

I think this is where building self-esteem plays a big role. Encourage her to do right, praise her when she does, warn her against sin, punish when necessary, but never let her doubt my love.

Certainly there is the obligation of parents to instruct their children in God's Word (Deut 6:7). And why is knowledge of Scripture important? 2 Timothy 3:16-17 gives a few reasons. Also, if we look at the temptation of Jesus in the wilderness, notice how he resisted the temptation. What did he say, "It is written...." That is, he quoted Scriptures. It's not just knowing verses, however, lots of people can quote verses, it's about being able to apply them. It's not just carrying a Bible with you it's about living out the words.

Thanks for y'alls input! :D

You are a wise women =)

*pokes your last part of your post*
God bless you =D
 
M

Mal316

Guest
#28
A mild request... Please check my profile. I'm not a woman. :)


I will accept the "wise" compliment though. :D :D :D
 
N

nanabean

Guest
#29
A mild request... Please check my profile. I'm not a woman. :)


I will accept the "wise" compliment though. :D :D :D

Even easier......look at names...... Pink is for girls ....... Blue is for boys!!! Hahhaa
 
L

Lauren

Guest
#30
Even easier......look at names...... Pink is for girls ....... Blue is for boys!!! Hahhaa
Now why did I never notice that?

:waves at nanabean:
 
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N

nanabean

Guest
#31
Now why did I never notice that?

Because you were busy trying to catch up in cc!!!

:waves at nanabean: (remember me and my papillon?)
YES I remember you and your Papillon!!! (((Mugsy))) I've missed you and your posts and have been praying you and your family (hubby??) are doing well!!!
 
L

Lauren

Guest
#32
YES I remember you and your Papillon!!! (((Mugsy))) I've missed you and your posts and have been praying you and your family (hubby??) are doing well!!!
Wow, you have a good memory, you even remembered my dog's name! I am only passing through...I find I can only stomach CC for short periods of time. My husband was placed in a home where he's much improved with strict control of his meds. The separation has brought each of us back to the Lord's feet where neither us had been for a long time. I do not foresee him coming back to live with us again, but at least we are beginning to recover a friendship of sorts (albeit very tenuous at times).

Thanks for your prayers!

~ Lauren

ps. sorry mal, I don't want to derail your thread....I was just delighted to see nanabean!
 
M

Mal316

Guest
#33
No worries, Lauren! I'm happy for you and nanabean. :D
 
N

NoTearsShed

Guest
#34
A mild request... Please check my profile. I'm not a woman. :)


I will accept the "wise" compliment though. :D :D :D


Sorry =/
I need to remember that if the avatar is in blue letters then your a he & if its in pink letters they are a she SORRY again =/


& =D
 
N

NodMyHeadLikeYeah

Guest
#35
My mom still tells me boys have cooties, and im 28.