Need advice

[Angie85]

Here's my situation:
I don't have any family except for my three small kids nor friends. Me n the kids father of all three been having issues n had an altercation where he had threatened me with a knife he has mental issues where he had gotton on medication since then and also certain members of his family doesn't like me and therefore nags at him so he goes off on me. I would like for him to b around for holidays and also to help me out with babysitting. I have one person who is currently helping where I met her thru WRAP. The things with her I catch her lying about little things and she constantly wants me to take her here and there while she sits on her butt all day and I'm working two jobs on top of taking care of the kids. Not only that she is supposed to be kicked out of her place as if the first since her transitional housing supposed to b over with. I am just confused on wethet or not I should give the kids father another chance and if things will work out also I don't know if god is testing me to see how strong I can be or if he is trying to tell me give him another chance. Confused

 

[levi85]

I will pray God will help , change the situation and bless you.

I think you should talk to him about the problems you are alone facing

 

[blondieindahouse]

Welcome to CC!

1 Corinthians 14:33 For God is not the author of confusion.

The pressure of the holiday season and all that goes on is no time for you to trust someone who you havent in the immediate past imho. The holidays last for about one month from now. If I were you,I would find another babysitter perhaps through the church(do you go to church?) and I would stick it out! You left out way too many details for me to give you any other kind of advice. God hates divorce. He wants y'all to get back together but only in HIS TIME.
You must always consider the safety of your children first and foremost.. If you are exhausted well you are exhausted! I dont mean to sound harsh but it is what it is right? I know how hard single parenting can be because I did it for 16 yrs. I was exhausted every holiday season. It just goes with the territory.

But best thing you can do is draw nigh to the Lord. Seek HIM with all your heart, your mind and your soul. He promised to guide you.

Dont allow yourself to get caught up in the illusions of a happily ever family just because it is the christmas season. Weigh this out wisely and consider your kids safety FIRST. Where there is a will there is a way. Get creative in looking for a sitter. Dig deeper. Phil 4:8 I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

I pray that the Lord guides you in his understanding in the matter. I pray for you Gods strength and discernment and wisdom.Ignite in this young lady the ferver to please you Lord and the thirst to search your words in your truth you left for us as our spiritual food . In Jesus Christ holy name I pray. Amen

Hang in there and stick around here for support. There is wisdom in the multitude of council. HUGS

 

[Angie85]

So when you say he does in his time give it some time and let him visit here and there and go from there

 

[Sirk]

Umm...he threatened you with a knife. You need to report him to the police and keep your kids away from him. You need a restraining order. That friend you spoke of doesn't sound like a good friend at all. God helps those who help themselves.

 

[sassylady]

You need to do what is best for the children, and if their father is that much of a problem or dangerous, I wouldn't personally want him involved. It certainly makes it harder on you, I've been there, but my commitment to the kids was far more important than how I was feeling. Besides, if he yells at you or whatever he does, it only adds to how hard things are on you and there are times you have to put boundaries up.

 

[Dan58]

Only you can judge the character and temperament of the kids father, as to whether he is safe and reliable now? If he still has mental issues and there is even a slight risk of danger, I'd look for another avenue for assistance. Does he pay any child support? It would seem to be more beneficial to find a more reliable child care service. If the father is really sincere about getting another chance, he could demonstrate it by taking some of the responsibility off your back by being financially supportive. He needs to chip in some money to help with your burden instead of being part of the problem. God is not testing you, your just having some difficult times because the kids father and family are of no assistance. Many states offer public child care assistance, you might look to see if any such subsidized child care program exist in your area. jmo [h=3][/h]

 

[blue_ladybug]

Since he's threatened you with a knife before, my advice is run far far away and take your kids with you. Mentally unbalanced people can snap in an instant and do something permanent that they'll regret later..

 

[Angela53510]

I agree with Blue that you should not let this man back into the lives of you and your children. The next time, he might use the knife. This should not be a goal for you, ever.

Better safe than sorry.

As for the sorry friend, find someone else to babysit. Do you go to church? If not, you should try it. Hopefully, you will make trustworthy friends who can lend a helping hand.