Should my husband be upset about this?
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I'm confused. You said your husband often threatens to go out with the guys if you say you have work obligations.
So then you have often traveled for work without him in the past?
Also, you say your husband is going to use this trip against you. Are you saying your husband is in the habit of using your work against you? That you argue about this often?
Why did you make an agreement with your husband not to travel for work without him if you didn't think it was a reasonable agreement? A better question, why was the agreement made to begin with? Are there trust issues?
To me it doesn't sound like a work-related problem. It seems like there's no trust. I suggest marital counseling.
So then you have often traveled for work without him in the past?
Also, you say your husband is going to use this trip against you. Are you saying your husband is in the habit of using your work against you? That you argue about this often?
Why did you make an agreement with your husband not to travel for work without him if you didn't think it was a reasonable agreement? A better question, why was the agreement made to begin with? Are there trust issues?
To me it doesn't sound like a work-related problem. It seems like there's no trust. I suggest marital counseling.
God tells us to handle our job as if we are working for him. Consider Ephesians 6:5-8, which Paul writes to slaves but which we can apply to employees:
Slaves, obey your earthly masters with respect and fear, and with sincerity of heart, just as you would obey Christ. Obey them not only to win their favor when their eye is on you, but like slaves of Christ, doing the will of God from your heart. Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not men, because you know that the Lord will reward everyone for whatever good he does, whether he is slave or free.
Only God’s Authority Is Absolute
•
Wives never obey a husband asking her to sin.
•
This is a simple rule
–
but it takes courage to do.
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The Bible allows no authority greater than God’s.
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The apostles said, “We ought to obey God rather
than men” (Acts 5:29).
This is key for all authority!
A man this controlling obviously has a lot of issues in the relationship. He wants her to work, AND dictate to her boss the work she will do?
NOT! The boss is not his to control. And his petty threats tell me this husband is not in any way a Christian. I notice the OP never answered the question earlier in the thread!
Is your husband a born again Christian?
Are you a born again Christian?
If you are not, then you have much bigger issues than just this problem with your husband.
If you are Christians, a husband still does not have the right to control is wife - that appears no where in Scripture. However, what does appear is this:
"submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ." Eph. 5:21
As for verse 22 saying the word "submit" it is not there in the Greek.
Besides, the word "submit" in the Greek implies "voluntary" submission. Obedience is having to do it whether you feel it is right or not.
Do you want to lose your job? If not, then go on the trip. If your husband continues to act in this controlling and abusive manner, I think you need to go for counseling. And marriage counseling, if he wants to go.
Read the book "A Cry for Justice" by Jeff Crippen. It is a book about abuse. Your situation sounds very typical of the early stages of abuse. If your husband is terrorizing you about this trip, the that constitutes abuse. Praying you get some help!
NOT! The boss is not his to control. And his petty threats tell me this husband is not in any way a Christian. I notice the OP never answered the question earlier in the thread!
Is your husband a born again Christian?
Are you a born again Christian?
If you are not, then you have much bigger issues than just this problem with your husband.
If you are Christians, a husband still does not have the right to control is wife - that appears no where in Scripture. However, what does appear is this:
"submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ." Eph. 5:21
As for verse 22 saying the word "submit" it is not there in the Greek.
Besides, the word "submit" in the Greek implies "voluntary" submission. Obedience is having to do it whether you feel it is right or not.
Do you want to lose your job? If not, then go on the trip. If your husband continues to act in this controlling and abusive manner, I think you need to go for counseling. And marriage counseling, if he wants to go.
Read the book "A Cry for Justice" by Jeff Crippen. It is a book about abuse. Your situation sounds very typical of the early stages of abuse. If your husband is terrorizing you about this trip, the that constitutes abuse. Praying you get some help!
You might want to read the entire thread before you respond to posts. Your comment does not apply to the content. He wants her to work,they need the income.
James 1:19
Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger;
Proverbs 17:27
The one who has knowledge uses words with restraint, and whoever has understanding is even-tempered.
James 1:19
Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger;
Proverbs 17:27
The one who has knowledge uses words with restraint, and whoever has understanding is even-tempered.
Is your husband a born again Christian?
Are you a born again Christian?
If you are not, then you have much bigger issues than just this problem with your husband.
Eternal security and friendship with Christ: Theres nothing more important!
If you are Christians, a husband still does not have the right to control is wife - that appears no where in Scripture. However, what does appear is this:
"submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ." Eph. 5:21
As for verse 22 saying the word "submit" it is not there in the Greek.
Besides, the word "submit" in the Greek implies "voluntary" submission. Obedience is having to do it whether you feel it is right or not.
Thank you for the biblical explanation. Some people men are unlearned and under the impression that a woman is to take anything and everything from her husband. They will have much to explain on judgement day .
She wrote this in #1.
But he also says we need my income, so I can't just quit.
But yet you still feel justified in your moot comment?
You are showing your ignorance.
Proverbs 29:20
Do you see someone who speaks in haste? There is more hope for a fool than for them.
Therefore my counsel is for her to ask her husband sooner rather than later, let him mull it over for the weekend, and submit to his decision whatever it may be.
Money cometh and it goeth, but keeping the husband and the wife together is more important than money. I suggest you not be so hasty to lay the snare for her to provoke her husband's anger.
Ephesians 5:22-33
[SUP]22 [/SUP]Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
[SUP]23 [/SUP]For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
[SUP]24 [/SUP]Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.
[SUP]25 [/SUP]Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;
[SUP]26 [/SUP]That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,
[SUP]27 [/SUP]That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.
[SUP]28 [/SUP]So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.
[SUP]29 [/SUP]For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:
[SUP]30 [/SUP]For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones.
[SUP]31 [/SUP]For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.
[SUP]32 [/SUP]This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church.
[SUP]33 [/SUP]Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.
Money cometh and it goeth, but keeping the husband and the wife together is more important than money. I suggest you not be so hasty to lay the snare for her to provoke her husband's anger.
Ephesians 5:22-33
[SUP]22 [/SUP]Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
[SUP]23 [/SUP]For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
[SUP]24 [/SUP]Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.
[SUP]25 [/SUP]Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;
[SUP]26 [/SUP]That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,
[SUP]27 [/SUP]That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.
[SUP]28 [/SUP]So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.
[SUP]29 [/SUP]For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:
[SUP]30 [/SUP]For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones.
[SUP]31 [/SUP]For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.
[SUP]32 [/SUP]This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church.
[SUP]33 [/SUP]Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.
Well first, I am not seeing the husband loving his wife as Christ loves the church, nor as well as his own body. I am seeing a spoiled temper tantrum by a man who thinks he can control not only his wife, but everyone around her, including her boss.
As Blondie pointed out, THEY NEED THE MONEY! What more can you need to know??
As far as your lovely passage of Scripture, I already dealt with it. First, you miss verse 21, which in Greek is part of the end of chapter 5. (It is English manuscripts, especially those who are rigidly complementarian that divide Verses 21-22, not the Greek manuscripts.)
"submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ." Eph. 5:21
[SUP]21 [/SUP]ὑποτασσόμενοι ἀλλήλοις ἐν φόβῳ Χριστοῦ.
[SUP]22 [/SUP]Αἱ γυναῖκες τοῖς ἰδίοις ἀνδράσιν ὡς τῷ κυρίῳ," Eph. 5:21-22 Greek.
In fact, in the Greek manuscripts, the word submission does NOT appear in verse 22! The only way you can possible make it work, is to include the word ὑποτασσόμενοι or upotassomenoi, a present deponent particle, which is found in verse 21, and therefore make it part of the passage, but really having to force the point to do it. In fact, if you do take ὑποτασσόμενοι and place it into verse 22, you would have to change the tense around, as it needs an active indicative verb to make sense in verse 22.
It is never more important for a husband and wife to stay together if there is abuse going on. The kind of controlling and immature behaviour the OP describes in her husband, as well as the fear she is experiencing about going on this trip with regards to how her husband will respond, really shows that this is not a Christian marriage, but in fact, an abusive one. God does NOT expect anyone to stay with an abuser. Nor does the law!
This is true. He is not a born again. I am. He's Catholic
He has been upset about my work but he will not allow me to quit. I offered. He said no. I make good money and have a more stable job than he does. His contract is up in the spring and it appears he may not be renewed.
Yes he has major trust issues. He accuses me of having meetings with men when I'm at my office. He went through my phone and saw that I offered to take a male colleague for a drink and see my new office. He accused me of cheating. I told him the man is gay. He tried to call him and interrogate him. The man is gay and he is a link to my professional success!
I never went on that drink or met Ghe guy but he uses things like this to accuse me. I didn't go even before he went through my phone.
I have never cheated. And I neve travel for more than a 2 hour trip (same day). This is the first time I've been asked to go out of state with my female boss.
He has been upset about my work but he will not allow me to quit. I offered. He said no. I make good money and have a more stable job than he does. His contract is up in the spring and it appears he may not be renewed.
Yes he has major trust issues. He accuses me of having meetings with men when I'm at my office. He went through my phone and saw that I offered to take a male colleague for a drink and see my new office. He accused me of cheating. I told him the man is gay. He tried to call him and interrogate him. The man is gay and he is a link to my professional success!
I never went on that drink or met Ghe guy but he uses things like this to accuse me. I didn't go even before he went through my phone.
I have never cheated. And I neve travel for more than a 2 hour trip (same day). This is the first time I've been asked to go out of state with my female boss.