Double Standards in so Many Churches Today.

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Dec 1, 2014
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#21
Adultery? Is that all you are concerned about? What about the old fashioned idea of two future soul mates still being virgins before their wedding night (after all, this preceeds adultery! Virginity, so important to GOD, is such a rare commodity today. My own pastor is a grandfather but none of his 3 children are married. A close friend of mine, a minister, took a personal vow to not perform the nuptials if he knew the couple were already living together. Needless to say, he has not done a wedding service in 12 years, except once in a nursing home! I am a licensed minister, and to be honest, the weddings that I have been a part of, whether by providing the music, or conducting the service myself, including my own two children, were done after the couples had consummated their bodies to each other. In some cases, a child or children were present, that had been born before the parents had even thought about a wedding ceremony. The 'old' days were "First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes Susie with a baby carriage." Today, it's "First comes baby, marriage is purely optional, and what's love got to do with it?"
 
J

Jak795

Guest
#22
Adultery is a very easy problem to address in the Church. If a Preacher has concrete evidence someone is living in Adultery, the Preacher will tell them to give up this sin. If they refuse to quit practicing the sin of Adultery, The preacher will ask them not to attend Church Services at this particular place of worship any longer. Problem solved.
He who is without sin, cast the first stone. If you turn away one sinner, you turn away all. You shun when you should welcome and teach. It will leave you with an empty church. Because we are all sinners.

You don't have to approve of one's lifestyle, but you don't turn them away from the light of God. This is precisely why a Christian church is seen as being nothing but a club. A social gathering for people with perfect lives who do no wrong. And why most people feel like they don't belong and are pushed away.

God doesn't help people with perfect lives. They don't need help. He helps those who are broken, hurt, and are struggling on this earth.
 
Feb 11, 2011
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#23
Are you the one without sin that casts the first stone?

Not at all. Simply saying what my church rule is about situations where a member keeps living in sin willingly. This rule applies to all members. And this is decided by a brotherhood meeting, and many meetings held by the ministerial (Pastors & Deacons)
 

hornetguy

Senior Member
Jan 18, 2016
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#24
So how many obese people has your church excommunicated? Gluttony is a sin... How many liars have been driven from fellowship? How many gossips? I know women, and men that do nothing BUT spread gossip.

Or is your righteous indignation reserved only for those that have been divorced? Instead of gleefully withdrawing fellowship from those "sinners", perhaps you should be prayerfully working with them? I know that's not NEARLY as much fun for you, but it's a lot more Christ-like.
 

Tommy379

Notorious Member
Jan 12, 2016
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#25
I'd be cautious of articles such as this. If Jesus stated divorce and remarriage is adultry, I'd take his word for it.
 
N

NewWine

Guest
#26
Wow. All I can say on this thread is how sad.
 

hornetguy

Senior Member
Jan 18, 2016
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#27
I'd be cautious of articles such as this. If Jesus stated divorce and remarriage is adultry, I'd take his word for it.
So, if two divorced people commit adultery when they marry, is it forgivable? What would Jesus say about that?
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
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#28
So, if two divorced people commit adultery when they marry, is it forgivable? What would Jesus say about that?
Jesus understands the human condition very well. Most definitely forgivable.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
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#29
Adultery? Is that all you are concerned about? What about the old fashioned idea of two future soul mates still being virgins before their wedding night (after all, this preceeds adultery! Virginity, so important to GOD, is such a rare commodity today. My own pastor is a grandfather but none of his 3 children are married. A close friend of mine, a minister, took a personal vow to not perform the nuptials if he knew the couple were already living together. Needless to say, he has not done a wedding service in 12 years, except once in a nursing home! I am a licensed minister, and to be honest, the weddings that I have been a part of, whether by providing the music, or conducting the service myself, including my own two children, were done after the couples had consummated their bodies to each other. In some cases, a child or children were present, that had been born before the parents had even thought about a wedding ceremony. The 'old' days were "First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes Susie with a baby carriage." Today, it's "First comes baby, marriage is purely optional, and what's love got to do with it?"
So this pastor only will marry those that are without sin?
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
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#30
So what church are you a member of? So we can see how this looks in practice?

By the way does your church pluck out its eyes or cut off its hands to stop sin as well? because Jesus said who must do instead of sinning ...right?
This "church" will only do this in extreme cases.
 
May 22, 2014
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#31
So i am divorced as is my partner does that make us both adulterers?
Can 2 people not be in love.....
 

Dino246

Senior Member
Jun 30, 2015
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#32
So i am divorced as is my partner does that make us both adulterers?
Can 2 people not be in love.....
You'll likely get a range of responses to this, but look first to the Scripture. What does it say about divorce and remarriage? Does it say absolutely, with no exceptions, that remarried divorce(e)s are adulterers? There is an exception in the middle... "except for marital unfaithfulness" (Matthew 5:32). Other versions say, "saving for the cause of fornication" or "for the reason of unchastity"....

If you were divorced for reasons other than marital unfaithfulness, you may want to have a long chat with the Lord. But don't be afraid of Him; He does love you. :)

I understand that "partner" is becoming a functional synonym for "spouse", but it is also a catch-all for any relationship. Your profile says, "not married", so if you are engaging in sexual activity you are committing the sin of fornication, regardless of the nature of your previous divorces.

As to your last sentence, "Can 2 people not be in love..." Well the answer to that is simple: Yes. It's what they do with their minds (Matthew 5:28) and bodies (1 Thessalonians 4:5) that determines the purity or sinfulness of the relationship. Being "in love" is not an excuse for sin.

That all sounds harsh and judgmental; it is not meant to be. I'm just wanting to be clear. Don't think that I'm responding from an ivory tower though; I'm going through a divorce, and I don't particularly want to be alone for the rest of my life, so I need to know the answers on this too. :)
 

Tommy379

Notorious Member
Jan 12, 2016
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#33
I did not imply it was unforgivable, no way a rational mind can conclude this from my statement, just giving a condensed version mf Mark 10:10
 
R

RissaBug

Guest
#34
Adultery is a very easy problem to address in the Church. If a Preacher has concrete evidence someone is living in Adultery, the Preacher will tell them to give up this sin. If they refuse to quit practicing the sin of Adultery, The preacher will ask them not to attend Church Services at this particular place of worship any longer. Problem solved.
If what you say is true, then in order for two married adults (who were previously married to other people) to stop committing adultery, they must then get divorced.

But see... that divorce would be a sin because although the Bible does allow divorce in some situations, as described by those above me, it does not give permission for such a divorce.

Remember, marriage is a covenant. No matter the state of the two individuals before the new marriage, they are NOW in a covenant. God honors covenants.
 
May 22, 2014
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#35
My wife had cancer and I looked after her throughout despite all of this i was told by her after she recovered that she no longer loved me and wanted me to leave...I tried numerous avenues to stay but not to be I dont think can look at me bad for this. now my wife too be was in a bad relationship which ended and she raised her kids for over 10 years alone pretty fair to say I cant see God wishing anything but happiness for us.
 
Dec 19, 2009
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#36
Why do so many people who are against the sins of abortion and homosexuality condone adultery.

Adultery destroys the family, and so does abortion and homosexuality.
You are right that adultery destroys the family, and that's not all it destroys. Why it is that churches might be more tolerant of adultery than they are of homosexuality might because it is more obvious when people commit the sin of homosexuality than when they commit adultery. By the way, I consider all sins of lust to be adultery. Some are of a homosexual nature and others are of a heterosexual nature.

It might also be true that people struggling with adulterous temptation might be reluctant to criticize those who are committing adultery.
 
L

lowfuel1

Guest
#37
If what you say is true, then in order for two married adults (who were previously married to other people) to stop committing adultery, they must then get divorced.

But see... that divorce would be a sin because although the Bible does allow divorce in some situations, as described by those above me, it does not give permission for such a divorce.

Remember, marriage is a covenant. No matter the state of the two individuals before the new marriage, they are NOW in a covenant. God honors covenants.
Absolutely!

The second marriage may have begun in sin, but the thing to do is seek forgiveness and move on without compounding the wrong by committing second sin by breaking a second covenant.
 

hornetguy

Senior Member
Jan 18, 2016
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#39
​Then don't start a thread on it.
Yes... makes him sound very troll-like, doesn't it?

Read what Jesus told the woman who was caught committing adultery... sort of trumps everything else, I think.

[SUP]10 [/SUP]Then Jesus stood up again and said to the woman, “Where are your accusers? Didn’t even one of them condemn you?”[SUP]11 [/SUP]“No, Lord,” she said.
And Jesus said, “Neither do I. Go and sin no more.”