How did you deal with rejection?

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Ultimatum77

Guest
#1
Hello,
If anyone is willing, I would like to know how you personally dealt with rejection from friends, family, anyone etc? In order to respect people's privacy, you don't have to give details. Just want to know how you dealt with and allowed God to heal those areas? Any advice is appreciated....
 
Feb 7, 2015
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#2
That's an interesting name you chose. To be honest with you, I am reading your post simply because of that name.
 
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Ultimatum77

Guest
#3
That's an interesting name you chose. To be honest with you, I am reading your post simply because of that name.
It's my sports gaming forum name....I just like the number 7 and threw in the ultimatum part for randomness lol :)
 
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Depleted

Guest
#4
Hello,
If anyone is willing, I would like to know how you personally dealt with rejection from friends, family, anyone etc? In order to respect people's privacy, you don't have to give details. Just want to know how you dealt with and allowed God to heal those areas? Any advice is appreciated....
I kept on going. Why? Is there another choice?
 

Dan_473

Senior Member
Mar 11, 2014
9,054
1,051
113
#5
Hello,
If anyone is willing, I would like to know how you personally dealt with rejection from friends, family, anyone etc? In order to respect people's privacy, you don't have to give details. Just want to know how you dealt with and allowed God to heal those areas? Any advice is appreciated....
I make an effort to remember the many people who accept me... not to focus on the few that don't...

sometimes I sing this to myself:

Many people like me,*
A lotta people love me,
Guess I'll have some ice cream (or enjoy sunshine, walk in the trees and stuff)


[*to the tune of "nobody likes me."]
 

GodisGlorious

Senior Member
Jun 12, 2012
132
5
18
#6
I guess i will first share how the rejection from family and friends affected me:
IT made me believe I was unlovable
IT made me believe I was worth less
IT made me afraid of criticism
IT made me avoidant of people
IT made me self critical and self rejecting in my head
IT made it difficult for me to receive love
It made me resentful of the ones who rejected me.

How God met me in that and turned me around:
He revealed his love for me to me and brought me to a place where I could learn to receive it.
He got me focused on his promises and what his word says
He encourages me to give up my negative and critical thinking and seek his thoughts and ways.
He encourages me to turn to him in the face of criticism and to see it as an opportunity to seek his thoughts about me. AND to see that criticism can be a gift that allows you to look at what you believe about yourself and to seek his right view of you.
He encourages me to walk through the prison bars of the false beliefs that were keeping me in fear of others.
He encourages me to depend on him when i feel rejected and to know his acceptance of me.
He brings me to forgiveness and understanding of others.

Hope that helps some

God bless
 
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coby

Guest
#7
Hello,
If anyone is willing, I would like to know how you personally dealt with rejection from friends, family, anyone etc? In order to respect people's privacy, you don't have to give details. Just want to know how you dealt with and allowed God to heal those areas? Any advice is appreciated....
I dealt with Rejection of a former spouse by God showing me what I did to him, then totally forgive him, Well He did through me and God healed me up. Talked it out, both Said sorry, He had felt rejected too. Since then I couldn't care less If someone rejects me, since Jesus has totally accepted me. His Love just healed me. Oh and I learned from Corrie ten Boom to give That love you have for someone who rejects you to Him so He can turn it into His Love and you can love anyone with His Love.
 
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NewWine

Guest
#8
I struggle with my self image often...It's getting better with prayer, study and time, but I do still feel it sometimes yet. What I do to keep my esteem up, is I post Encouraging Bible Verses all over the place....to the point at one time that my husband thought I would completely cover the bathroom mirror. I don't have nearly as many on the mirror now, but at the time that was what I needed.
I have two favorite verses that helps me often.....Ephesians 2:10 says you are God's masterpiece. His workmanship. That is one powerful verse when we consider ALL the totally amazing things God created.....Mountains, Streams with waterfalls, springtime flowers, gardens, my children's smiles....and above all that, God calls little ol' me His masterpiece!

Another verse that helps me not stress, especially when the rejection is work related, is Isaiah 40:31 They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength. They shall mount up with wings as the eagles. They shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.
This verse is beautifully dual. The word "wait" can mean more than one thing. On one hand it means to "be patient"...like waiting for a bus. On the other hand it could mean to "serve"...like waiting on tables in a restaurant.

One last thing I have learned over time is part of the basis of needing God is realizing that ALL humans will disappoint or hurt us, but God never will. When I started putting my self worth and joy into God's hands where it belongs, I started to not get offended by rejection nearly as much and over time it's gotten so much easier. Who cares if Joe Schmo thinks I'm not enough.....God the creator of all KNOWS I am perfect in Him (Matt 5:48) and that with Him I can do ALL things (Phillippians 4:13)
Other verses that might help are:
2Timothy 1:7 For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. (self esteem is a necessary for a sound mind)
1 John 4:4 Ye are of God, little children, and have overcome them: because greater is he that is in you, than he that is in the world.
Philippians 4:19 And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. (self esteem is a need)

Last but not least.....if someone says something to me that really hurts or angers me....I get physical...not with the person, but I jump rope, punch the water bag, work in the garden, scrub the kitchen floor.....whatever it takes to get my heart racing and endorphin to release. Exercise releases endorphin. Endorphin makes us happy. God gave us a very intricate body where all the systems work together....if your mind is out of sorts the rest of you isn't far behind and vice versa. I hope this helps.
Peace!!
 
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Lost_sheep

Guest
#9
I always took rejection very personally. It always took a lot for me to extend myself to a place where I could be in the place where rejection was even a possibility, so when it happened, it hurt pretty badly. Eventually, I gave up trying.
 

Mylady_D

Junior Member
Mar 22, 2014
27
6
3
#10
Giving up is a normal and typical reaction to rejection. I was one that closed people off...so they couldn't hurt me. The problem with that; we are not called to be closed off from those around us. We are to be the light, to show Jesus to an obvious sinful unloving world. The Lord has taught me, and is still teaching me...to let the walls down. Many will reject me or what I say. They did it to the Lord...should I expect any different. It's the one or two that I can reach...that I can help that makes it worth the effort and pain. Does it hurt to be rejected...yes. For some of us it cuts deep...but it's worth it in the end. I guess that's how I deal with it. I look for the "prize" in the end.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
41,313
16,301
113
69
Tennessee
#11
I pick myself up, brush off the dust, move on and don't look back. Fear of rejection leads to fear of starting a relationship. It's not a healthy situation.
 
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Chuckt

Guest
#12
Hello,
If anyone is willing, I would like to know how you personally dealt with rejection from friends, family, anyone etc? In order to respect people's privacy, you don't have to give details. Just want to know how you dealt with and allowed God to heal those areas? Any advice is appreciated....
1.) Know what your identity is in Christ.
2.) Relationships are complimentary or reciprocal.

Sometimes in order to have a relationship, you have to understand that people are sinners and can't achieve better so you just accept them for what they are.

I don't know your situation so I cannot comment on it. The reason there are barriers is because either people need their space, they found something better or they feel some situation is not healthy or they feel that some situation could hurt them.

In forgiveness, we have to walk with people to help them because they will still hurt.

And in love we have to give people the freedom to leave if they want.
 
Dec 19, 2009
27,513
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#13
Hello,
If anyone is willing, I would like to know how you personally dealt with rejection from friends, family, anyone etc? In order to respect people's privacy, you don't have to give details. Just want to know how you dealt with and allowed God to heal those areas? Any advice is appreciated....
We are never alone, because the Lord is always with us, and we can talk to him. There is nothing we can do, when we lose a friend. We can beg them to be friends again, but no one wants to do that. If we've done something wrong, we can apologize. My experience is that people usually accept apologies.
 
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Depleted

Guest
#14
I always took rejection very personally. It always took a lot for me to extend myself to a place where I could be in the place where rejection was even a possibility, so when it happened, it hurt pretty badly. Eventually, I gave up trying.
This is not a question for Lost Sheep. It's a question for everyone else who reads this. Should someone tell Lost Sheep he's here, therefore setting himself up for possible rejection again, therefore hasn't given up trying like he thinks he has?
 

notuptome

Senior Member
May 17, 2013
15,050
2,538
113
#15
They are not rejecting you but they are rejecting Christ. Rejection for Jesus is not personal rejection just evidence of the separation of light and darkness.

For the cause of Christ
Roger
 
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Lost_sheep

Guest
#16
This is not a question for Lost Sheep. It's a question for everyone else who reads this. Should someone tell Lost Sheep he's here, therefore setting himself up for possible rejection again, therefore hasn't given up trying like he thinks he has?
I was speaking in the context of romantic interpersonal relationships. Rejection from acquaintances is one thing - take me or leave me. Rejection from a potential romantic interest was something else entirely. I gave up trying to chat up women who were trying to catch my eye. It's worked so well that most women in my small town of 2000 people think I am as gay as a picnic basket.
 
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Ariel82

Guest
#17
"Gay as a picnic basket" lol that is a new one.

I am trying to think of a time I was rejected...job interviews.

Being reject from those always made me not feel good enough.

However, I realized that it's not about me being good enough but if that is where God wants me to be.

Sometimes God wants others to do,that job or task. It doesn't mean you aren't good enough, just that God has something (or someone in terms of romantic relationships) in mind for you.

I don't think of it as a rejection anymore but God's way at redirecting me.
 
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Depleted

Guest
#18
I was speaking in the context of romantic interpersonal relationships. Rejection from acquaintances is one thing - take me or leave me. Rejection from a potential romantic interest was something else entirely. I gave up trying to chat up women who were trying to catch my eye. It's worked so well that most women in my small town of 2000 people think I am as gay as a picnic basket.
Ohhhh, you don't want to know my success rate in for losing the guy I loved. It's depressing to most people. But, really? What makes a picnic basket gay? Never heard that one, but you made me laugh.
 
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Depleted

Guest
#19
I was speaking in the context of romantic interpersonal relationships. Rejection from acquaintances is one thing - take me or leave me. Rejection from a potential romantic interest was something else entirely. I gave up trying to chat up women who were trying to catch my eye. It's worked so well that most women in my small town of 2000 people think I am as gay as a picnic basket.
Hey? Wait a minute. Iowa isn't North Dakota with a state population of 2000. Why not go over to the next town?

Seriously, never got bothered by relationship issues. Always figured I had two choices -- get married or live alone for the rest of my life. My problem was neither alternative bothered me, although I leaned toward living alone for the rest of my life.
 
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Depleted

Guest
#20
"Gay as a picnic basket" lol that is a new one.

I am trying to think of a time I was rejected...job interviews.

Being reject from those always made me not feel good enough.

However, I realized that it's not about me being good enough but if that is where God wants me to be.

Sometimes God wants others to do,that job or task. It doesn't mean you aren't good enough, just that God has something (or someone in terms of romantic relationships) in mind for you.

I don't think of it as a rejection anymore but God's way at redirecting me.
Job interviews? For me it was always, "their loss." I make for a lousy interviewee, but I work hard 95% of the time when I work, and I do what I'm supposed to, so any company that takes me landed a good employee. Their loss if they missed on me.

The ones who reject me that bother me are family. Can't give up on family, so I have to suck it up.