How should I feel?

[dbrown099]

Hey everyone. I am new to the sight! I am grateful to have run across this website.

I recently had a break up with my girlfriend. She broke up with me after almost 2 yrs strong. She told me I am unable to lead just yet. It was on her spirit to leave me. She told me I needed to grow to be a leader. I prayed to god and asked why this happened? I was and still am very much in love with her. God told me before I barley knew her name that I was going to marry her, which is why I was so confused about the break up. I fasted and prayed about it and I asked god to reveal our future. He again told me, after about 2 weeks of fasting, that I was still going to marry her. Although, He has again confirmed this with me, I am not seeing it play out. BTW its only been about a month since we broke up. So i became frustrated with God. Should I continue to test what god has told me and hold fast to that promise? Or is God just taking her away from me so I can grow so that when the time comes to marry her, I can be the leader she wants me to be?

Thank you in advance for any advice provided.

 

[blue_ladybug]

Well, to begin with, how did God "confirm this" with you? It's strange that he would tell you that you're going to marry somebody, without even knowing their name. Maybe the two of you just aren't meant to be, and she's just put in your life to test you, to see if you CAN become a leader. If the two of you are meant to be put together by God, then it will happen in His time, not yours.

 

[AuntieAnt]

If you want to know if it is God speaking to you or your own wishful thinking, you can use this as a rule of thumb:

A. If at this very moment you are restless, anxious, putting your trust in another person's actions, and if you aren't sure God is in control of your life, it isn't the faith of Jesus Christ. You're putting your faith in something/someone else.

B. If, on the other hand, you have joy and peace knowing that God is in control of your life and trust His love and care for you no matter what the outcome, then you are walking in the spirit of Christ. And you can be sure you hear the Voice of God.

God ain't the author of confusion. He doesn't contradict Himself. He won't tell you one thing and someone else another thing. The Lord says don't be anxious about anything and cast all our cares on Him and trust Him. He will take care of everything. And He would never tell us to put our faith in another person. Ever.

How should you feel about it? You should feel safe and happy and thankful that the Lord God knows what you need and is right now and always will be taking care of it. You don't have to direct Him how to do a thing. He reigns. Trust Him.

 

[sandtigeress]

Relationships are never always an easy road, and having god in the boat helps, but does not smooths everything over.
so yes, if you get it from god, that she is your future wife, ok.
But that does not mean that will happen tomorrow, or even that she is aware of that.

Yes you will have to grow to become a husband.
Saying "god wants it", is never enough, it is not even enough for you,
but it can not enough for the other partner,
showing, believing and loving is what is needed (and that includes leaving her alone, if that is necessary).

Build your relationship with god, become a man, that can be a father to future children,
and at some time in the future you may be together again, stronger and on the strong ground
of gods help.

Praying for you and her.

 

[dbrown099]

Thank you for your advice. Although I was a little vague with how we met lol. I'd known her for a little while so we had a friendship before anything else and we also worked together. As far as the confirmation, he spoke to me. I went home and prayed about it and got the same answer. I always pray for discernment so I don't confuse my thoughts with The holy spirit. And even in that moment, I didn't even think it was true until it was confirmed to me again. I guess what my real problem is, I stand strong on gods word, but Why would he postpone this?

 

[Miri]

Both parties have to grow and mature, maybe this is more to
do with your girlfriend?

 

[dbrown099]

Thank you for that!

At that moment I was calm, I wont forget it. I will continue to trust him and knowing that he doesn't contradict himself. And that the promises that hes set forth will come to pass.

 

[blue_ladybug]

Thank you for your advice. Although I was a little vague with how we met lol. I'd known her for a little while so we had a friendship before anything else and we also worked together. As far as the confirmation, he spoke to me. I went home and prayed about it and got the same answer. I always pray for discernment so I don't confuse my thoughts with the holy spirit. And even in that moment, I didn't even think it was true until it was confirmed to me again. I guess what my real problem is, I stand strong on gods word, but Why would he postpone this?

​God IS the Holy Spirit. When you hear one, you hear the other. Maybe he's postponing this, because he feels you're not ready yet, just as your girl friend does.

 

[dbrown099]

I would agree. Its a situation to where she just wants to be free for a while and just live life. She is a firm believer in god as well and I didn't think that maybe she needs to grow as well.

Thank you!

 

[dbrown099]

Thats Kind of the conclusion that I am coming to. I am growing at an extreme rate and I can literally feel My heart and mind changing. I cant help but to think that he is preparing me for a great future.

 

[AbigailZeke]

Hey everyone. I am new to the sight! I am grateful to have run across this website.

I recently had a break up with my girlfriend. She broke up with me after almost 2 yrs strong. She told me I am unable to lead just yet. It was on her spirit to leave me. She told me I needed to grow to be a leader. I prayed to god and asked why this happened? I was and still am very much in love with her. God told me before I barley knew her name that I was going to marry her, which is why I was so confused about the break up. I fasted and prayed about it and I asked god to reveal our future. He again told me, after about 2 weeks of fasting, that I was still going to marry her. Although, He has again confirmed this with me, I am not seeing it play out. BTW its only been about a month since we broke up. So i became frustrated with God. Should I continue to test what god has told me and hold fast to that promise? Or is God just taking her away from me so I can grow so that when the time comes to marry her, I can be the leader she wants me to be?

Thank you in advance for any advice provided.

Hi! I've read and seen God make things like this happen to two people before, so I have no doubt that.

...I guess what my real problem is, I stand strong on gods word, but Why would he postpone this?

You might already have an idea but because the break up was only very recently, your emotions are clouding your judgement? Well, I think it's good to remember what happened to Joseph, the dreamer. The first dream God gave him was when he was 17. It was only after 13 years later when the dream was realized. God remained faithful, even when circumstances were going against his vision. You know that she is the woman you will marry, if God is allowing this circumstance, something good will come out of it. Take the time off to grow more in Christ. You will never go wrong with that.

 

[jasonj]

Hey everyone. I am new to the sight! I am grateful to have run across this website.

I recently had a break up with my girlfriend. She broke up with me after almost 2 yrs strong. She told me I am unable to lead just yet. It was on her spirit to leave me. She told me I needed to grow to be a leader. I prayed to god and asked why this happened? I was and still am very much in love with her. God told me before I barley knew her name that I was going to marry her, which is why I was so confused about the break up. I fasted and prayed about it and I asked god to reveal our future. He again told me, after about 2 weeks of fasting, that I was still going to marry her. Although, He has again confirmed this with me, I am not seeing it play out. BTW its only been about a month since we broke up. So i became frustrated with God. Should I continue to test what god has told me and hold fast to that promise? Or is God just taking her away from me so I can grow so that when the time comes to marry her, I can be the leader she wants me to be?

Thank you in advance for any advice provided.

just a thought after reading. when God gives a word, in my own experience, the enemy tries hard to take it by causing difficulties that seek to pull you away from Gods word. for example the beginning God said "you will surely die" this was His command to protect adams life. the enemy offered " surely you will not die, God doesn't want you to eat it because it will make you like Him". Because Gods word meant Life for man, and the serpents intention is to kill steal and destroy everytime God speaks, hes there to oppose it with His lies. if God has told you in your heart for Him, it will be as He has said if you choose to have faith in His words and not what things look or feel like right now.

God bless you

 

[AuntieAnt]

Thank you for that!

At that moment I was calm, I wont forget it. I will continue to trust him and knowing that he doesn't contradict himself. And that the promises that hes set forth will come to pass.

Amen! \/ And the Lord promises Himself to us. If anything else stands in the way of Jesus being our main focus, if there's anything that even competes with Jesus being Lord of our life, we set ourselves up for disappointment.

One thing's for sure - we learn the easy way or the hard way. But we learn. God is faithful to keep us from falling.

 

[skylove7]

I'm so sorry your gf just broke up. I will pray for you
Best wishes for you

 

[slave]

First, lay it wholly in God's lap! Do you reserve the right to make God's answer fit your plans? First, you must surrender her to Him. Now perhaps you have done this, then the answer you say you have received from God test the Spirit. We need not follow a way we do not understand, but follow the way God has made clear to you. Pray about it, read His Word for wisdom about it, ask God to move in real time in the transforming of your mind about her. Sit quietly in front of God and wait on Him to speak thru the Holy Spirit.

Most of God's guidance is unconscious, thus "trust with all your heart..." Proverbs 3:5-6. Remember His job in your relationship is to guide you so be at peace and believe that promise. God also expects us to use our intelligence. God says, "He will instruct you and teach you the way you should go." Psalms 32:8,9. So look for the answers in His Word -- seek and ye shall find, ask, seek and knock and the door will be opened. Have you been busy seeking?

Remember too, God won't show you more than you need to know, frustration comes from lack of faith, so trust Him. And lastly, I would suggest not to tell God how He must guide. Maybe it is sometimes right to ask for a sign as is evidenced in the Gideon story. But keep in mind God had already made it clearly known what he was to do. We walk by faith, never forget the premise your life is set in -- confidence in things yet seen! Your relationship with God is one that is a mystic supernatural touch of God which comes with His call, it may come in a thunderous clap or a gradual dawning but wait expectantly on God for His version of the answer, not doubting it to be your best answer for yourself, and His purposes for your life. He IS interested in this choice.

Right now simply become the man God would have you be, that the godly girl of your dreams is praying for. That is a focus worthy of His Word, seek Him with all of yourself over this, and trust in perfect peace that He will come to bear witness to His will.

I will pray for you and her as well. May you both seek God wholeheartedly.

 

[sharkwhales]

I would say, focus more on God, than on her and the potential relationship. God is the one that will get you through whatever happens, whether she comes along or not.

I don't believe God forces people into relationships. God might lead them but if they choose not to follow... well, in any case you need God more than anyone else.

 

[ramx2016]

Hey everyone. I am new to the sight! I am grateful to have run across this website.

I recently had a break up with my girlfriend. She broke up with me after almost 2 yrs strong. She told me I am unable to lead just yet. It was on her spirit to leave me. She told me I needed to grow to be a leader. I prayed to god and asked why this happened? I was and still am very much in love with her. God told me before I barley knew her name that I was going to marry her, which is why I was so confused about the break up. I fasted and prayed about it and I asked god to reveal our future. He again told me, after about 2 weeks of fasting, that I was still going to marry her. Although, He has again confirmed this with me, I am not seeing it play out. BTW its only been about a month since we broke up. So i became frustrated with God. Should I continue to test what god has told me and hold fast to that promise? Or is God just taking her away from me so I can grow so that when the time comes to marry her, I can be the leader she wants me to be?

Thank you in advance for any advice provided.

I say run! Run fa fa away! Seriously...

Her pointing out that your are not a leader yet and you have more to work - says volumes about her as well - if she were indeed your partner this would be a JOINT venture not just her telling you to fix it. ... and maybe ... she was just trying to spare your feelings? As in she may her eyes on a LEADER already? IDK but heed the advice of the other posters and focus your attention on God and ask the Holy Spirit to guide you! Jesus wants you to be happy don't forget that....

And never TEST God...or God's will... that's an open invitation for evil to enter the situation...

A

 

[Depleted]

Hey everyone. I am new to the sight! I am grateful to have run across this website.

I recently had a break up with my girlfriend. She broke up with me after almost 2 yrs strong. She told me I am unable to lead just yet. It was on her spirit to leave me. She told me I needed to grow to be a leader. I prayed to god and asked why this happened? I was and still am very much in love with her. God told me before I barley knew her name that I was going to marry her, which is why I was so confused about the break up. I fasted and prayed about it and I asked god to reveal our future. He again told me, after about 2 weeks of fasting, that I was still going to marry her. Although, He has again confirmed this with me, I am not seeing it play out. BTW its only been about a month since we broke up. So i became frustrated with God. Should I continue to test what god has told me and hold fast to that promise? Or is God just taking her away from me so I can grow so that when the time comes to marry her, I can be the leader she wants me to be?

Thank you in advance for any advice provided.

You feel like you feel. No one can really change a feeling, so what's the purpose of figuring out if you should or shouldn't be feeling something?

As for God telling you? I strongly suspect you told you. God only talked to Abraham a handful of times in his very long life. Now it seems like everyone gets this feeling and then decides it's God giving them a message. Been there. Done that. Disaster!!!

Also, you can't force God's hand by fasting.

So what should you do? The usual. Pray. Seek God. Study his word. Pretty much what one does all the time anyway.

 

[Depleted]

If you want to know if it is God speaking to you or your own wishful thinking, you can use this as a rule of thumb:

A. If at this very moment you are restless, anxious, putting your trust in another person's actions, and if you aren't sure God is in control of your life, it isn't the faith of Jesus Christ. You're putting your faith in something/someone else.

B. If, on the other hand, you have joy and peace knowing that God is in control of your life and trust His love and care for you no matter what the outcome, then you are walking in the spirit of Christ. And you can be sure you hear the Voice of God.

God ain't the author of confusion. He doesn't contradict Himself. He won't tell you one thing and someone else another thing. The Lord says don't be anxious about anything and cast all our cares on Him and trust Him. He will take care of everything. And He would never tell us to put our faith in another person. Ever.

How should you feel about it? You should feel safe and happy and thankful that the Lord God knows what you need and is right now and always will be taking care of it. You don't have to direct Him how to do a thing. He reigns. Trust Him.

Actually, I can usually tell when God is teaching me something by whatever he says isn't what I was expecting to receive, yet it's a good answer!

No, he doesn't talk to me, but he does give me those kind of things from his word and from really obvious signs. Like who goes around asking God if her husband will live and minutes later hears the Hallelujah Chorus from Mendel's Messiah while going up an elevator from a parking garage, to then see the choir singing it in the lobby of a hospital? That stuff just doesn't happen without God doing it. Really obvious he was reminding me he is in control -- even though he never out-and-out answered IF hubby would live.

That's more how I can tell it's from God then any deep down feeling in my body. I was shivering (it was warm inside the building) and crying. Not peaceful and calm. And I was still rushing to get to him for the ever present fear of "what will they do to him next?"

But for one brief moment in the middle of all that I got
[video=youtube;6oSsEF8-vHw]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6oSsEF8-vHw[/video]

from God. (Not these singers, but just as unexpected. Actually teens from a Charter school an old friend went to when I knew her back in my old church, so that brought back some good memories too.)

 

[Depleted]

Thank you for your advice. Although I was a little vague with how we met lol. I'd known her for a little while so we had a friendship before anything else and we also worked together. As far as the confirmation, he spoke to me. I went home and prayed about it and got the same answer. I always pray for discernment so I don't confuse my thoughts with The holy spirit. And even in that moment, I didn't even think it was true until it was confirmed to me again. I guess what my real problem is, I stand strong on gods word, but Why would he postpone this?

Same problem stated differently.

When I was young, one of my friend's mom let me use her Audi for the day. (My friend wanted to visit her old neighborhood and show me around. It was an hour away, so I was surprised it was fine with her Mom. I didn't even ask if I could before she handed me the keys.)

I have been in love with Audi's ever since. Had I asked "God" if I should get an Audi that day, he would have said yes. If I asked for confirmation later, he still would have said yes. He would keep saying yes because I want an Audi. BUT, it's not him saying yes, its me saying yes because it was already something I wanted but knew I couldn't afford. It's my dream car, just as she was your dream girl.

Getting a voice in your head to agree with something you want is nothing but you telling you what you want. Stop pinning this on God. If I fasted and prayed for two weeks because I wanted to get God to get me that car, I would be getting the same answer. It's still me wanting that car.

If someone knocks on my door in a minute, tells me I won the car, shows me the car right there, and the papers that says it's mine, I'm still going to check out how that could possibly happen, because it feels like a scam. BUT, in the end, when I find out it really is my car all safe and legal -- no strings attached -- THEN I know it's God. AND, the only reason I wouldn't sell it immediately, because, let's face it, I don't have a garage or private parking, live in a city with bumper to bumper parking, so that car will have dinks and dents on it within a month even if I never got in it! (Only if God hands me full rights to my dream car will I ever trust I could keep such a car where I live now. lol)

You're going to have to grow up on your present assumptions of how God communicates with you. Just because you really want something rarely means God is not only handing it to you, but telling you he's handing it to you. The rest? Just your mind working the way all our minds work. Nothing special and a completely worthless reason to fast for two weeks.