I Need Courage, and a lot less crying

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Depleted

Guest
#1
I failed. I quit cigarettes Sunday night, and made it until about half an hour ago. I've been praying, doing, eating, anything but have a cig. There's been a lump in my throat since last night. The kind like when all your emotions get stuck there I don't know if that's physical or not, but it is something that can be swallowed with a cig. So I prayed, and ate, and my stomach (pain area) got worse, and I figured if I just get out of this house maybe, but then the phone rang, and rang, and they were people I had to talk to, (TENS unit), and it's raining, so I have a headache and I'm tired.

I crashed. Then I burned. Literally. Lit my first vig. On number 4 now, and I'm stuck on one thought --

Hubby will know from the smell. I'll burst out crying, and we have no personal space anymore because someone is always coming in his room for one thing or another, interrupting us (nurses, doctors, therapist, ais, janitorial staff, etc.) He had a great week, and all I can do now is cry in shame.

Help!
 
Feb 7, 2015
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#2
Who creates shame? This is a chance for John to get to feel some of the manhood he has to feel is slipping away, and give YOU support now. Let him do it. To Hell with the people who happen to come into the room.
 

Demi777

Senior Member
Oct 13, 2014
6,877
1,949
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#3
Sis the only thing that I can advise you to try is dark chocolate..lots of it. it will ease it and make it easier. Dont feel bad. I tried multiple times and took me forever to stop. Your a strong lady and can do it, I believe in you and so does God. dont be ashamed. That feeling is never from God.
 
K

kaylagrl

Guest
#4
I failed. I quit cigarettes Sunday night, and made it until about half an hour ago. I've been praying, doing, eating, anything but have a cig. There's been a lump in my throat since last night. The kind like when all your emotions get stuck there I don't know if that's physical or not, but it is something that can be swallowed with a cig. So I prayed, and ate, and my stomach (pain area) got worse, and I figured if I just get out of this house maybe, but then the phone rang, and rang, and they were people I had to talk to, (TENS unit), and it's raining, so I have a headache and I'm tired.

I crashed. Then I burned. Literally. Lit my first vig. On number 4 now, and I'm stuck on one thought --

Hubby will know from the smell. I'll burst out crying, and we have no personal space anymore because someone is always coming in his room for one thing or another, interrupting us (nurses, doctors, therapist, ais, janitorial staff, etc.) He had a great week, and all I can do now is cry in shame.

Help!
My hubby is trying to quit also,cutting way back and I keep telling him how proud I am of him,but that is all I say. Just encouragement. Now I would never want to discourage a person from quitting but with all the stress you are facing with your husbands illness, do you think this is the time to try and make this big change. Cig. are a coping device. Is there a possibility of trying to quit when things are a little more calm? You are adding stress and anxiety that you dont need on your shoulders just now. Its just a thought.
 
D

Depleted

Guest
#5
Who creates shame? This is a chance for John to get to feel some of the manhood he has to feel is slipping away, and give YOU support now. Let him do it. To Hell with the people who happen to come into the room.
The people coming in the room are going to keep asking what's wrong with him. It's a quiet day if we can say three sentences without being interrupted or some person we don't really know joins in.
 
D

Depleted

Guest
#6
My hubby is trying to quit also,cutting way back and I keep telling him how proud I am of him,but that is all I say. Just encouragement. Now I would never want to discourage a person from quitting but with all the stress you are facing with your husbands illness, do you think this is the time to try and make this big change. Cig. are a coping device. Is there a possibility of trying to quit when things are a little more calm? You are adding stress and anxiety that you dont need on your shoulders just now. Its just a thought.
I did. He's walking. He's eating. He's getting to the final stretch before coming home and I want him to come home to a smoke free house.
 
D

Depleted

Guest
#7
Sis the only thing that I can advise you to try is dark chocolate..lots of it. it will ease it and make it easier. Dont feel bad. I tried multiple times and took me forever to stop. Your a strong lady and can do it, I believe in you and so does God. dont be ashamed. That feeling is never from God.
Food fits a particular person's preference. I can't do dark chocolate that much. (Diabetic and IBS.) I've been doing pretzels, which taste kind of cigarettey to me.
 
K

kaylagrl

Guest
#8
I did. He's walking. He's eating. He's getting to the final stretch before coming home and I want him to come home to a smoke free house.
I have never smoked so I cant really give good advice. My husband stopped buying cartons and only buys enough to get through 3 or 4 days. It helped him a lot. He use to smoke because he was bored he said,now he doesn't because he doesnt just have them laying around. He'd have to go out to buy them.Sort of tricking his mind.
 
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Depleted

Guest
#9
Sooo, I called, and I burst out crying when I told him, he said, nonchalantly, "That's okay. Failure is expected." And he repeated it until I believed him.

Now, I can't figure out if I'm crying from relief or crying because he just walked across the PT room three times in his walker.

Great. Now all I have to do is stop crying to go see him.
 
D

Depleted

Guest
#10
I have not given up quitting. This is merely a


(Except I stumble way more dramatically and harder than that.)
 
Feb 7, 2015
22,418
413
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#11
Sooo, I called, and I burst out crying when I told him, he said, nonchalantly, "That's okay. Failure is expected." And he repeated it until I believed him.

Now, I can't figure out if I'm crying from relief or crying because he just walked across the PT room three times in his walker.

Great. Now all I have to do is stop crying to go see him.
I hope you are aware of how much you gave him in that little exchange.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
41,243
16,252
113
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Tennessee
#12
I failed. I quit cigarettes Sunday night, and made it until about half an hour ago. I've been praying, doing, eating, anything but have a cig. There's been a lump in my throat since last night. The kind like when all your emotions get stuck there I don't know if that's physical or not, but it is something that can be swallowed with a cig. So I prayed, and ate, and my stomach (pain area) got worse, and I figured if I just get out of this house maybe, but then the phone rang, and rang, and they were people I had to talk to, (TENS unit), and it's raining, so I have a headache and I'm tired.

I crashed. Then I burned. Literally. Lit my first vig. On number 4 now, and I'm stuck on one thought --

Hubby will know from the smell. I'll burst out crying, and we have no personal space anymore because someone is always coming in his room for one thing or another, interrupting us (nurses, doctors, therapist, ais, janitorial staff, etc.) He had a great week, and all I can do now is cry in shame.

Help!
I quit smoking last year. Lasted 3 months. Then I snapped. Going to try again this weekend. The truth is that I'm an addict and nicotine is my drug of choice. I have said a prayer that God will deliver both of us from that evil affliction.
 
C

coby2

Guest
#13
I failed. I quit cigarettes Sunday night, and made it until about half an hour ago. I've been praying, doing, eating, anything but have a cig. There's been a lump in my throat since last night. The kind like when all your emotions get stuck there I don't know if that's physical or not, but it is something that can be swallowed with a cig. So I prayed, and ate, and my stomach (pain area) got worse, and I figured if I just get out of this house maybe, but then the phone rang, and rang, and they were people I had to talk to, (TENS unit), and it's raining, so I have a headache and I'm tired.

I crashed. Then I burned. Literally. Lit my first vig. On number 4 now, and I'm stuck on one thought --

Hubby will know from the smell. I'll burst out crying, and we have no personal space anymore because someone is always coming in his room for one thing or another, interrupting us (nurses, doctors, therapist, ais, janitorial staff, etc.) He had a great week, and all I can do now is cry in shame.

Help!
Oh say sorry Lord and move on. I stopped years ago. I just don't count the times I bought a pack out of frustration. I just said: sorry Lord and went on not smoking and drowned them.
There is actually one stop method where then after a month they smoke for a day, so I just said when I failed: hey I'm now doing that method lol.
 
Feb 7, 2015
22,418
413
0
#14
The people coming in the room are going to keep asking what's wrong with him. It's a quiet day if we can say three sentences without being interrupted or some person we don't really know joins in.
When I was hospitalized with a stroke, we almost ignored people unless it was totally impossible. Most of the time, they had to listen to our conversation while they did their thing. LOL
 
B

BeyondET

Guest
#15
I quit smoking last year. Lasted 3 months. Then I snapped. Going to try again this weekend. The truth is that I'm an addict and nicotine is my drug of choice. I have said a prayer that God will deliver both of us from that evil affliction.
How about three I'm one too been smoking off and on since I was 14 I quite 2 times in that time frame for about 2yrs each time.
im going to try too this weekend. I hate the taste but I keep smoking what tha freak for me the times that I did it was cold turkey. I'll try too though better yet I'm going too quite smoking this weekend.
 

Pilkington

Senior Member
Jan 13, 2015
640
99
28
#16
Just a quick thought and don't know if you are able to get them in the states have you thought about trying vaping. The Royal College of Physicians in the UK are recogmending Vaping for giving up smoking. Yes potentially there may be risks as it has not been going long enough however the risks are less than smoking.

I have never smoked but understand how difficult giving up smoking is from a pharmacological view. It is both physically and pschylogically addictive. Please do not be hard on yourself. If you can't give up immediately the alternative is to cut down. Also although your husband is making good progress you have been through a very stressful time which makes giving up more difficult. I will be praying for you.

From the NHS website why cigarettes are addictive.

Cigarettes contain nicotine, which is highly addictive.
Even if you want to quit smoking, you may find it difficult because you’re addicted to the effects of nicotine.
[h=2]Chemicals in your brain[/h] Nicotine alters the balance of two chemicals, called dopamine and noradrenaline, in your brain. When nicotine changes the levels of these chemicals, your mood and concentration levels change. Many smokers find this enjoyable.
The changes happen very quickly. When you inhale the nicotine, it immediately rushes to your brain, where it produces feelings of pleasure and reduces stress and anxiety. This is why many smokers enjoy the nicotine rush and become dependent on it.
The more you smoke, the more your brain becomes used to the nicotine. This means you have to smoke more to get the same effect.
[h=2]Effects of quitting smoking[/h] When you stop smoking, the loss of nicotine changes the levels of dopamine and noradrenaline. This can make you feel anxious, depressed and irritable.
It’s normal to crave nicotine when you quit, as smoking provides an immediate fix to these unpleasant feelings.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
41,243
16,252
113
69
Tennessee
#17
How about three I'm one too been smoking off and on since I was 14 I quite 2 times in that time frame for about 2yrs each time.
im going to try too this weekend. I hate the taste but I keep smoking what tha freak for e the times that I did it was cold turkey. I'll try too though better yet I'm going too quite smoking this weekend.
I have said a prayer of deliverance for you as well. OK, the 3 of us are going to quit (yet again) this weekend. Sounds like a plan. May God help us all.
 
M

Miri

Guest
#18
Hi Lynn,

You didn't fail, you triumphed !!!!!

You want 5-6 days without smoking !!!!!!

Thats not failure. ;) That's a massive success.


Ok so you had one, put it behind you and see how long you can go this time.

Hubby can still go home to a smoke free zone, nothing has changed.

As we say in Yorkshire, chin up lass.
 
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BeyondET

Guest
#19
I've tried vapin patch gum etc.. I haven't tried the meds one can get from the doc kind of freaks me out about the side affects and all.

i see two option for me Cold turkey which I'll start in the morning when I wake up because I've already been hours asleep without them. little tuff I'm used to pulling on one first thing upon getting up. I dread saying this if I dont continue without them

I've been reading up on cigarettes the amount of added chemicals in cigarettes is threw the roof like 2000 known in them of which there's some that in inhance nicotine addiction a whole lot... so the other route would be American spirits or another brand that doesn't have all the added chemicals so to atleast slow down the massive cravings to a trickle with just the Nic without any of the boosters in the smokes. Smoke till I'm off of the chemical boosters then tackle the Nic. As you can see I'm struggling big time too.

but I'm going with the cold turkey first man I got to quite. It's really not good me especially since I was born with a heart defect aortic stenosis I shouldn't be smoking at all I've been a big dumb dumb in my life and Now lately I haven't had regular heart beats probably because of my age and years I've been smoking is starting to affect me. My heart valve will give out one day I know that but I haven't been trying to slow the process down at all it's like I don't care about my health I'm pissing it away. :(
 
Dec 19, 2009
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#20
I failed. I quit cigarettes Sunday night, and made it until about half an hour ago. I've been praying, doing, eating, anything but have a cig. There's been a lump in my throat since last night. The kind like when all your emotions get stuck there I don't know if that's physical or not, but it is something that can be swallowed with a cig. So I prayed, and ate, and my stomach (pain area) got worse, and I figured if I just get out of this house maybe, but then the phone rang, and rang, and they were people I had to talk to, (TENS unit), and it's raining, so I have a headache and I'm tired.

I crashed. Then I burned. Literally. Lit my first vig. On number 4 now, and I'm stuck on one thought --

Hubby will know from the smell. I'll burst out crying, and we have no personal space anymore because someone is always coming in his room for one thing or another, interrupting us (nurses, doctors, therapist, ais, janitorial staff, etc.) He had a great week, and all I can do now is cry in shame.

Help!
So stop worrying about it and start over. You only lost five days.