Porn addiction is eating me up.

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Waukeganman1234

Guest
#1
I am married and have two kids. Great job. I have been secretly addicted to porn for over 20 years. I have to watch it daily and masturbate several times per day. My wife does not know. We have ok sex life but I suffer from premature ejaculation which I think might be from the porn addiction. I also have bad social anxiety which might be due to the addiction. Anyone ever been thru this? How can I fight the urges and get my life back on track? God bless
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
41,311
16,300
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Tennessee
#2
You are not alone in this addiction as there are others. Only God will be able to resolve this. You must pray for deliverance from this addiction. God bless you as well. Welcome to CC.
 
Feb 7, 2015
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#3
I have read this and your other thread. I have some thoughts. But I also have some reservations. I will watch your posts for a while to level my thinking, if you don't mind. Maybe what I'm thinking doesn't even fit here.
 

azlightsout

Senior Member
Apr 20, 2016
2,151
57
48
#4
I was addicted for almost 10 years . I stopped like 3-4 years ago (COLD TURKEY). Porn is so Fake. Every women isn't a Model and they are not always smiling . You are wasting so much positive energy on Nothing . Maybe u should try replacing your (porn ritual - yes i had one too ) with a bible verse or a prayer .
 

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
Feb 21, 2014
70,869
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#5
There are literally hundreds of people on here who have posted about their own addiction to porn and masturbation. You're not alone. I'll let the men here address this issue. :)
 

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
Feb 21, 2014
70,869
9,601
113
#6
Not to mention, some women are forced into doing porn against their will. That's probably why they're not smiling..
 
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Waukeganman1234

Guest
#7
Willie please give your input. I need all the help and advice I can get. God bless
 
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Waukeganman1234

Guest
#8
How did u kick the habit? While addicted to porn did u notice any anxiety issues?
 
Feb 7, 2015
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#9
Not to mention, some women are forced into doing porn against their will. That's probably why they're not smiling..
In truth, just about all women doing porn flicks are "forced" into it by one circumstance, or another. Oh, it may not actually someone strong-arming them into it, but there are hundreds of social, economic, and psychological pressures or perceptions that lead all of us to feel we are forced into situations we might not have otherwise chosen.
 
Feb 7, 2015
22,418
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#10
Willie please give your input. I need all the help and advice I can get. God bless
How did u kick the habit? While addicted to porn did u notice any anxiety issues?
Not just yet. There are a lot of people here who have good ideas, and I will just reserve my comments until you have had a chance to dialogue with them.
 
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popeye

Guest
#11
I am married and have two kids. Great job. I have been secretly addicted to porn for over 20 years. I have to watch it daily and masturbate several times per day. My wife does not know. We have ok sex life but I suffer from premature ejaculation which I think might be from the porn addiction. I also have bad social anxiety which might be due to the addiction. Anyone ever been thru this? How can I fight the urges and get my life back on track? God bless
What is going on is emotionally centered.

Realm of the emotions.

The prisons are full of this type person.

You can't win if you love it. You have to hate it. It is the devil.
Remove all triggers. Fast. Purchse the bible on DVD,and fill your mind with God's word.

Don't attempt a one dimensional solution. Won't work.

Get a 4 or 5 dimensional attack plan,but your main thrust is "Get WHITE HOT FOR JESUS".

Worship,pray,read the word,go to every meeting you can.

Don't try to remove the trap. Get in the spirit,get blown out for Jesus,pursue you calling,divorce this world and pleasures,and the porn trap will totally loose its luster.

It is your enemy. It is a destroyer.

Get violent with sin,and pursue heaven VIOLENTLY.
 
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Ultimatum77

Guest
#12
How did u kick the habit? While addicted to porn did u notice any anxiety issues?
My response in another porn thread:
Maybe it will help you...caution it's long conglomerate of posts here/there....

No Christian man who calls himself one should be watching porn. Do men fail? Yes but there is no excuse.....especially when you're married to a woman you committed to. Men will use excuse of "it's my relaxation technique/hobby/ "I have needs" blah blah...its sin. Jesus said to look at a woman with lust is to commit adultery with her in your heart.

Porn reduces a woman to meat / very superficially. It degrades those who are married (the spouse/woman) by saying in effect that they are not enough to satisfy the man.

It is a spirit of lust/demon that needs to be cast out by prayer on your part. You need to actively pray for your husband to renew his mind and soul. Try putting a cross next to the computer so when he's watching whatever filth he sees the cross and is reminded that his sins nailed Jesus to the cross and that he is in effect driving the nails deeper. ( I know it's not Biblical per se but the thought that you are killing Jesus willingly/driving the nails in may convict some of sin sometimes.)

Get a tech savy person to install an adblocker/ website blocker on your computers to dissuade him from watching crap.

Point out that his behavior is very childish for a grown married man with a family to be looking at another person's genitals....it is very immature and shows a lack of self-control/restraint.

The best you can do is pray....ultimately it is up to the person to want/desire deliverance from this bondage....if he doesn't he will be trapped in this sin until either God breaks him via some circumstance or he comes to his senses and realizes his error.

You shouldn't tolerate it and ask him if he loves porn more than you.....if he does then maybe you should seek for divorce if you've put up with it for several years with no change....if he says he loves you tell him he needs to commit to you and stop watching porn b/c you don't deserve to be 2nd in his heart to porn.

Maybe also post some Bible verses around your computer/even desktop wallpaper....

Psalm 101:3King James Version (KJV)

3 I will set no wicked thing before mine eyes: I hate the work of them that turn aside; it shall not cleave to me.

The only way to clean up his mind is the word of God and casting down his vain imaginations/dirty thoughts.....the Bible is good at bleaching the mind and soul! May the Lord restore your marriage and your man to a vessel of honour in God's hands.

Then what is "lust of the eyes?" its technically looking/leering which is a sin.....Jesus said to avoid the lust of the flesh, lust of the eyes, and pride of life. These areas are what causes sin....

I agree, porn has no place in any marriage relationship. Any form of pornography should not be excused, If people need porn to get aroused there is seriously something wrong with their marriage and possibly even their spiritual life. There is verse after verse in the Bible about controlling your eyes for a reason. When you entertain yourself by "indulging" your eyes you are giving roots to the weeds of lust in your soul and pretty soon you will be completely wrapped in lust like poison ivy on a pillar to the point it chokes out your spiritual light from the Holy Spirit. Whether men decide to control their eyes or not is between them and God. But God commands us to use self-control and control our eyes. If you give satan an inch he will take you for miles and miles until you are completely lost and away from God.
 
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popeye

Guest
#13
The devil has an easy time with tempting men into porn,or some pretty co worker etc.

Such an easy thing to set up a man.

We are so stupid in this arena.

We absolutely need PROTOCOL. Every receptor and full discernment navigating this end time treachery.

Your family needs you,us,strong.

Get mad at it. Rise up. Decapitate it. It is a demon eating you ever living lunch.

That dimension is powerful,but it is NOT ENOUGH.

A boxer with one punch is easy to defeat.

Enter the sin merry go round.

Why oh why can I not STAY FREE??

BECAUSE YOU ARE ONE DIMENSIONAL.

When you got saved you left Egypt but never crossed the Jordan.

Living in the promise land is your PORTION.
IT IS WORK. No free manna, no cloud or pillar of fire.

WORK. FREEDOM IS WORK. YOU TAKE IT AND POSSES IT.

RISE UP AND TAKE IT MAN
 
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Ultimatum77

Guest
#14
The devil has an easy time with tempting men into porn,or some pretty co worker etc.

Such an easy thing to set up a man.

We are so stupid in this arena.

We absolutely need PROTOCOL. Every receptor and full discernment navigating this end time treachery.

Your family needs you,us,strong.

Get mad at it. Rise up. Decapitate it. It is a demon eating you ever living lunch.

That dimension is powerful,but it is NOT ENOUGH.

A boxer with one punch is easy to defeat.

Enter the sin merry go round.

Why oh why can I not STAY FREE??

BECAUSE YOU ARE ONE DIMENSIONAL.

She you got saved you left Egypt but never crossed the Jordan.

Living in the promise land is your PORTION.
IT IS WORK. No free manna, no cloud or pillar of fire.

WORK. FREEDOM IS WORK. YOU TAKE IT AND POSSES IT.

RISE UP AND TAKE IT MAN
I agree going cold-turkey won't cut it, you got to root out the spirit of lust from your soul, mind, eyes and life.....bleach yourself in all areas of this sin..... so to speak....
 
Feb 7, 2015
22,418
413
0
#15
My response in another porn thread:
Maybe it will help you...caution it's long conglomerate of posts here/there....

No Christian man who calls himself one should be watching porn. Do men fail? Yes but there is no excuse.....especially when you're married to a woman you committed to. Men will use excuse of "it's my relaxation technique/hobby/ "I have needs" blah blah...its sin. Jesus said to look at a woman with lust is to commit adultery with her in your heart.

Porn reduces a woman to meat / very superficially. It degrades those who are married (the spouse/woman) by saying in effect that they are not enough to satisfy the man.

It is a spirit of lust/demon that needs to be cast out by prayer on your part. You need to actively pray for your husband to renew his mind and soul. Try putting a cross next to the computer so when he's watching whatever filth he sees the cross and is reminded that his sins nailed Jesus to the cross and that he is in effect driving the nails deeper. ( I know it's not Biblical per se but the thought that you are killing Jesus willingly/driving the nails in may convict some of sin sometimes.)

Get a tech savy person to install an adblocker/ website blocker on your computers to dissuade him from watching crap.

Point out that his behavior is very childish for a grown married man with a family to be looking at another person's genitals....it is very immature and shows a lack of self-control/restraint.

The best you can do is pray....ultimately it is up to the person to want/desire deliverance from this bondage....if he doesn't he will be trapped in this sin until either God breaks him via some circumstance or he comes to his senses and realizes his error.

You shouldn't tolerate it and ask him if he loves porn more than you.....if he does then maybe you should seek for divorce if you've put up with it for several years with no change....if he says he loves you tell him he needs to commit to you and stop watching porn b/c you don't deserve to be 2nd in his heart to porn.

Maybe also post some Bible verses around your computer/even desktop wallpaper....

Psalm 101:3King James Version (KJV)

3 I will set no wicked thing before mine eyes: I hate the work of them that turn aside; it shall not cleave to me.

The only way to clean up his mind is the word of God and casting down his vain imaginations/dirty thoughts.....the Bible is good at bleaching the mind and soul! May the Lord restore your marriage and your man to a vessel of honour in God's hands.

Then what is "lust of the eyes?" its technically looking/leering which is a sin.....Jesus said to avoid the lust of the flesh, lust of the eyes, and pride of life. These areas are what causes sin....

I agree, porn has no place in any marriage relationship. Any form of pornography should not be excused, If people need porn to get aroused there is seriously something wrong with their marriage and possibly even their spiritual life. There is verse after verse in the Bible about controlling your eyes for a reason. When you entertain yourself by "indulging" your eyes you are giving roots to the weeds of lust in your soul and pretty soon you will be completely wrapped in lust like poison ivy on a pillar to the point it chokes out your spiritual light from the Holy Spirit. Whether men decide to control their eyes or not is between them and God. But God commands us to use self-control and control our eyes. If you give satan an inch he will take you for miles and miles until you are completely lost and away from God.
All good thoughts. But, just as none of us became Christians by being told we were supposed to, neither does a man walk away from this addiction because he is to told it is bad, and he needs to quit.

It is not "eyes." It is our "thinking." And unfortunately, just as when we came to Christ, there is a process of developing certain understandings and traveling our own road to personal revelation about a variety of things that needs to take place.
 
U

Ultimatum77

Guest
#16
All good thoughts. But, just as none of us became Christians by being told we were supposed to, neither does a man walk away from this addiction because he is to told it is bad, and he needs to quit.

It is not "eyes." It is our "thinking." And unfortunately, just as when we came to Christ, there is a process of developing certain understandings and traveling our own road to personal revelation about a variety of things that needs to take place.
True, it means total transformation in all areas of our life....my post was a hodgepodge from replies I gave :) just hopefully wanted to give the brother some ideas to implement like an adblocker/cross to take small steps to freedom....it took a long time to build up the addiction and it's going to take some time to sand it down and totally eradicate it....not a microwave fix... :)
 
Feb 7, 2015
22,418
413
0
#17
True, it means total transformation in all areas of our life....my post was a hodgepodge from replies I gave :) just hopefully wanted to give the brother some ideas to implement like an adblocker/cross to take small steps to freedom....it took a long time to build up the addiction and it's going to take some time to sand it down and totally eradicate it....not a microwave fix... :)
And I think you did an excellent job of showing the very important and basic "Why" we need to do whatever it happens to take in our own esoteric situations to overcome this parasitical life-sucker.
 
U

Ultimatum77

Guest
#18
Brother I noticed you posted a thread about your wife not being happy....perhaps the underlying issues is she knows about your porn addiction and you need to come clean to both God and her....

Women are more perceptive than men (and truthfully sometimes nosy :) but she may have stumbled on your bookmarks/web browsing history or know that your not "into her" during sex as much as before b/c you have porn distracting you....either way I recommend coming clean to your wife...it may hurt initially but unless you start the recovery process by being truthful to God and others in your life, you won't want to get better/be stuck in the same sin....
 

Ruth

Member
May 14, 2016
99
5
0
#19
This is a spiritual problem and one that can only be broken through prayer and fasting. I will tell you (since I am a certified addictions counselor) that if you don't get help, your addiction will get worse not better and take you places that you never dreamed you would or could go too. Find a local support group that majors in this type of addiction just for men or through your church counseling centre if you have one. The addiction will not go away by itself nor through sheer will power.... all the best to you and your family.....
 
Feb 7, 2015
22,418
413
0
#20
Brother I noticed you posted a thread about your wife not being happy....perhaps the underlying issues is she knows about your porn addiction and you need to come clean to both God and her....

Women are more perceptive than men (and truthfully sometimes nosy :) but she may have stumbled on your bookmarks/web browsing history or know that your not "into her" during sex as much as before b/c you have porn distracting you....either way I recommend coming clean to your wife...it may hurt initially but unless you start the recovery process by being truthful to God and others in your life, you won't want to get better/be stuck in the same sin....
There is probably some serious truth in this post. But, may I add a word of caution? Simply admitting you have this problem will not magically cure anything. Accompanying the admission, there MUST be an assurance for your wife that you are actively and seriously doing something about it.

I sincerely advise against dumping this on your wife until you have seen no less that 4 to 6 months of improvement.

She is NEVER to be used as your therapist. This whole thing is a personal attack and insult to most wives who see the pornography as a threat to their womanhood and marriage... just as much as an actual mistress you have been keeping on the side.... and, often, from her perspective, still ARE, if it is not crystal clear that you have left "the other woman" behind. Just "saying"it" WILL NOT cut it. You must prove your sincerity by producing some tangable evidence. (Which you cannot do yet... nor will you be able to for quite some time.)

Often, a third, detached, party is more than helpful in this area. (Read: Professional.)
 
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