D
Good day brothers and sisters in Christ, I'm having a very difficult issue I'm facing and although I'm leaning on God for His direction and guidance regarding the matter, I feel as though hearing from others may help tremendously, this post may be long so I appreciate those of you who read this in full. The question is in regards to if I am to pursue someone whom I believe is my wife...
I was recently in a relationship for 3 years and we broke up in June, we continued to talk for a few months until I felt that us being friends was not going to work. During our relationship, she brought and introduced me to Christ whom I had absolutely no prior relationship with, but the attending of church helped me get drawn to Jesus and with me hearing His voice, and seeking to live for Him, it caused quite a rift in our relationship. From going to church, hearing the word, to going home to have intercourse that very next hour, it was quite an experience to go through. We had our issues in the relationship (like every relationship) and I knew that everything would be much better in it, if we had just brought God into it.
I'm 26, and she is 22, so I've always felt as if we were in two different places mentally, and sometimes (I still do) would give her the benefit of the doubt because I know how I was at 22, and you couldn't get me to budge on anything. I have always had a belief that God put us together for a reason, and that we were meant for each other, as in she was the one for me, and I for her. She grew up in the church, and there's rumors out there about those growing up in church being the "worst ones" (whatever that means lol) but I still looked past that. She once told me that she has a gift of bringing whomever she dates closer to God, (a previous boyfriend of hers accepted Christ at 17) and I didn't fully accept Christ into my life until just 2 months ago (Sept. 18) when I was baptized, some 3 months after we had broken up. I told her while we towards the end of our relationship, that the reason that is, is because she would need a man that would have a strong foundation in the Lord to where he is able to bring her back to Him, something I truly believe.
I have not spoken to her since October, she ended up finding someone as a rebound, and now they are currently dating, a social media site says they've been dating since July, although I am aware that they have been talking since maybe April. In her confusion towards the end of our relationship, I felt as if she was trying to compare and contrast the differences between me and him, something I refused to be apart of which is why I let go and tried to move on. I prayed to God that He would not allow this to happen and that He would find favor in me and give me one last chance to do right by Him and her, obviously with no answer. 3 years of my life with my absolute best friend is something I could not fathom of letting go,and I was afraid of being alone, but in this time of us not talking, I was able to learn that I wasn't alone, and that God was and is with me the entire time. I've been following the leading of His spirit, and I do struggle with recognizing His voice, trying to discern whether it is of Him or if I'm putting these thoughts in my own head.
Well Thanksgiving she called me, and while I was not expecting it (was kind of hoping for it) I was very happy to hear from her. We talked for about an hour and one of my main questions was how she was doing with her relationship with Jesus. She told me that she is again starting to pray, that she's been praying for me, and that she's taking baby steps in regards to the entire situation...
This is where my question comes in because I immediately felt as if it was a duty of mine, and that everything that has happened between us, has brought us to this exact point. Although we are not together, and although she is with the other guy, I felt that as a Godly man, as a Godly husband, it is my responsibility to lead, to lead my wife, a Godly woman, to be her head, and to just be who it is that God has called me to be. Now I am still young in my spiritual walk, so I'm still unsure if I'm jumping the gun, if I'm overreacting, or what the case may be. Since she called, I can't get her out of my mind, and by the grace of God, He'a answered my prayers of bringing me peace of mind because my thoughts can literally get out of control when it comes to her, regarding the pain, regarding the joy and regarding her current boyfriend, whom I know I shouldn't be jealous of but in my mind, he's messing around with my wife and that I don't take too kindly lol.
I really don't know what to do in this situation, and I know that I need to remain patient and just wait on the Lord and He will continue to show me the way. I don't want to force myself to do anything outside of His will, and mess up the blessing of what He has planned for me but I feel as if, if there was a place to take a leap of faith, this would be it. We would routinely call each other at 5:30 in the morning just to speak before I started work and she went on about her day, and I'm thinking of doing that, but just to pray for or with one another before we head out.
What's stopping me from doing all this, is her current boyfriend. I have issues, speaking to someone while they are involved in a relationship, especially in this manner because it's something I would not appreciate if I were him, and I always respect people and their relationships. Then this voice pops in my head and says that me and her have been together for 3 years, we were a few months away from marriage, and that she is the one whom I was to marry... my relationship with her triumphs anything they have. (Something I don't want to act on because I'm not sure if it's coming from God and because I'm not sure, I know it's not.)
So I'm really at a standstill, and am obviously feeling that I need to continue to be patient and wait on the Lord because Romans 8 tells us, that all things work together for the good of those who are called according to his purpose.
I'm really just curious if I have the correct mindset about being the Godly husband for her and leading her. Am I wrong to think this is the time for the leap of faith? Do I leave her alone and continue doing what I was doing before her call? Because I'm really unsure, and I continue praying about it, I know I truly need to continue to be patient but I'm not sure if this is God speaking to me and letting me know that my time is coming...
Really really seeking Godly advice.
Thank you for fully reading this
I was recently in a relationship for 3 years and we broke up in June, we continued to talk for a few months until I felt that us being friends was not going to work. During our relationship, she brought and introduced me to Christ whom I had absolutely no prior relationship with, but the attending of church helped me get drawn to Jesus and with me hearing His voice, and seeking to live for Him, it caused quite a rift in our relationship. From going to church, hearing the word, to going home to have intercourse that very next hour, it was quite an experience to go through. We had our issues in the relationship (like every relationship) and I knew that everything would be much better in it, if we had just brought God into it.
I'm 26, and she is 22, so I've always felt as if we were in two different places mentally, and sometimes (I still do) would give her the benefit of the doubt because I know how I was at 22, and you couldn't get me to budge on anything. I have always had a belief that God put us together for a reason, and that we were meant for each other, as in she was the one for me, and I for her. She grew up in the church, and there's rumors out there about those growing up in church being the "worst ones" (whatever that means lol) but I still looked past that. She once told me that she has a gift of bringing whomever she dates closer to God, (a previous boyfriend of hers accepted Christ at 17) and I didn't fully accept Christ into my life until just 2 months ago (Sept. 18) when I was baptized, some 3 months after we had broken up. I told her while we towards the end of our relationship, that the reason that is, is because she would need a man that would have a strong foundation in the Lord to where he is able to bring her back to Him, something I truly believe.
I have not spoken to her since October, she ended up finding someone as a rebound, and now they are currently dating, a social media site says they've been dating since July, although I am aware that they have been talking since maybe April. In her confusion towards the end of our relationship, I felt as if she was trying to compare and contrast the differences between me and him, something I refused to be apart of which is why I let go and tried to move on. I prayed to God that He would not allow this to happen and that He would find favor in me and give me one last chance to do right by Him and her, obviously with no answer. 3 years of my life with my absolute best friend is something I could not fathom of letting go,and I was afraid of being alone, but in this time of us not talking, I was able to learn that I wasn't alone, and that God was and is with me the entire time. I've been following the leading of His spirit, and I do struggle with recognizing His voice, trying to discern whether it is of Him or if I'm putting these thoughts in my own head.
Well Thanksgiving she called me, and while I was not expecting it (was kind of hoping for it) I was very happy to hear from her. We talked for about an hour and one of my main questions was how she was doing with her relationship with Jesus. She told me that she is again starting to pray, that she's been praying for me, and that she's taking baby steps in regards to the entire situation...
This is where my question comes in because I immediately felt as if it was a duty of mine, and that everything that has happened between us, has brought us to this exact point. Although we are not together, and although she is with the other guy, I felt that as a Godly man, as a Godly husband, it is my responsibility to lead, to lead my wife, a Godly woman, to be her head, and to just be who it is that God has called me to be. Now I am still young in my spiritual walk, so I'm still unsure if I'm jumping the gun, if I'm overreacting, or what the case may be. Since she called, I can't get her out of my mind, and by the grace of God, He'a answered my prayers of bringing me peace of mind because my thoughts can literally get out of control when it comes to her, regarding the pain, regarding the joy and regarding her current boyfriend, whom I know I shouldn't be jealous of but in my mind, he's messing around with my wife and that I don't take too kindly lol.
I really don't know what to do in this situation, and I know that I need to remain patient and just wait on the Lord and He will continue to show me the way. I don't want to force myself to do anything outside of His will, and mess up the blessing of what He has planned for me but I feel as if, if there was a place to take a leap of faith, this would be it. We would routinely call each other at 5:30 in the morning just to speak before I started work and she went on about her day, and I'm thinking of doing that, but just to pray for or with one another before we head out.
What's stopping me from doing all this, is her current boyfriend. I have issues, speaking to someone while they are involved in a relationship, especially in this manner because it's something I would not appreciate if I were him, and I always respect people and their relationships. Then this voice pops in my head and says that me and her have been together for 3 years, we were a few months away from marriage, and that she is the one whom I was to marry... my relationship with her triumphs anything they have. (Something I don't want to act on because I'm not sure if it's coming from God and because I'm not sure, I know it's not.)
So I'm really at a standstill, and am obviously feeling that I need to continue to be patient and wait on the Lord because Romans 8 tells us, that all things work together for the good of those who are called according to his purpose.
I'm really just curious if I have the correct mindset about being the Godly husband for her and leading her. Am I wrong to think this is the time for the leap of faith? Do I leave her alone and continue doing what I was doing before her call? Because I'm really unsure, and I continue praying about it, I know I truly need to continue to be patient but I'm not sure if this is God speaking to me and letting me know that my time is coming...
Really really seeking Godly advice.
Thank you for fully reading this
