Men and Jobs (or rather, the lack of one)

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Depleted

Guest
#21
I've never married so I've never dealt with the "provider" thing. I think my concern would like anybody else's, man or woman: the need to have money to support myself. That is all I would ask.
Have you managed to provide for yourself? Assuming, "Yes," you really have dealt with the provider thing. :)
 
Feb 28, 2016
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#25
when our country called it's Mother's out of their nesting arena to partake of the fights,
then once again, our homes and hearths were broken...
 
Jan 24, 2009
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#26
If you're good at what you do, then you should have no problem finding work.

If I had to blame something for men's lack of jobs, I'd blame women. Yep, I'm going to blame everything on feminism. Probably half of everything wrong is feminism. That sounds good.
Radical left-wing feminism is bad.

That's the feminism that thinks of mothers/parenting as a second-class position/job/occupation.

That's the feminism that thinks there is absolutely no difference between men and women.
 

Desertsrose

Senior Member
Oct 24, 2016
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#28
Okay, I think we all know that most men like to have the security of having a good job, being "providers", etc... But it seems like I am always dealing with men who are jobless or who are looking for a better job, and are not succeeding for some reason out of their control yet still revolving around them.

So basically I was just wondering exactly what sort of things regarding this situation go through a man's head, what psychological and emotional effects it has on them, and what the most effective way to bring cheer and encouragement to them is. I know praying, but what else?

Thanks everybody!
Hi Emily,

Although guys share a lot in common, they all have personalities that differ from one another.

Have you ever drawn any of them into a conversation about what they're feeling, how they're thinking about their unemployment or about why they aren't content in their job?

Some guys are visionaries and once the vision comes into being, they become bored and need a new challenge.

Others are content at whatever they find and strive to move up within the company.

Others don't like their job and take whatever job comes available, but they continue to look for something they would enjoy doing.

And some want better pay.

Competition.

Worldly peer pressure, in other words keeping up with the Joneses.

I'm sure others will add to that list. That's what I know from others.

What's really one of the best thing you can do including prayer is to listen.

Show interest with how they're feeling. Some guys can't express what they're going through, but you know there frustrated.

Let them be frustrated, be their friend and really listen. Talk when they want to talk. Be quiet when they don't want to share what's going on inside.

I don't think there's a one size fits all kind of answer though. I think this is in James and paraphrased - If anyone lacks wisdom, let him pray and God will give wisdom liberally to the single-minded person.




 
Feb 28, 2016
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#29
our gentle Warriors have been betrayed by this fallen-world - but Jesus knows their hearts
from way before
and He can't but Love all the inevitable awakenings as they occur, day-by-day...
 
Feb 28, 2016
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#30
around our house we have several different plaques that read a scripture that is quite un-comfortable
for a lot of people...

one is on the garage steps where our company comes in, and says, 'Jesus Wept'
and another one is on the living-room-wall and says, 'The just shall live by Faith'...
they've been there for years and never, never have we had ONE COMMENT
on the value of these precious sayings-nor to the obvious relationship that they actively play in o
both of our own lives as a witness, unfortunately the common-duck comes out and clams up
for their tongues are taken...

just a share...
 

88

Senior Member
Nov 14, 2016
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#32
Ask the Lord for the person He has for you---maybe some of these guys are messed up----men and jobs is a big subject---the real key is finding God's person for you----Grace and Peace
 

Angela53510

Senior Member
Jan 24, 2011
11,780
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#33
I am going to take a different direction here. You seem to be saying, not that one boyfriend is like this, but a string of them? Right?

I think you are attracting the wrong kind of man! I know the first main boyfriend I had as an adult, hated work. He always had an excuse. Then he decided he didn't want to work. It was a rocky relationship. I finally got out, and purposed in my heart, I would not go near another irresponsible man.

That was the right move. I met a wonderful man in college, who was there to get a job and career. We fell in love, and after 32 years working for the same company, he retired two years ago. I also worked, being a teacher, until I became disabled. We both have good pensions, and although money was tight in the beginning, not giving up really helped us stay debt free and always have a good incoming salary.

I realize there are circumstances and careers in which it is hard to get a job. I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about continually ending up dating men who make excuses for themselves, and have no intention of really finding work. That is what you are attracting!

Or, is it that you are attracted to a certain type of man? Maybe a handsome, strong and athletic type that was enabled by his family, school and society his whole life? Never had to do anything at home, never thought for some reason he would not have to have a career some day? Maybe thought he could make it on his good looks or his athletic ability? You know the type.

Not to stereotype! My second son was a gifted athlete and very handsome. But we had high expectations of him at home, and he certainly was driven to perform in the sport of his choice. He also had some good friends who told him to get a good career. He became a chartered account. He met a hardworking young woman, who is now a doctor. All his friends also have careers and good jobs.

Hang around friends that are going out with men who have jobs or prospects. And if my speculation is totally wrong, I'm sorry. It just seems like there are really lots of good men, but you have to look for them!
 

EmilyNats

Senior Member
Jul 28, 2016
1,374
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#34
I am going to take a different direction here. You seem to be saying, not that one boyfriend is like this, but a string of them? Right?

I think you are attracting the wrong kind of man! I know the first main boyfriend I had as an adult, hated work. He always had an excuse. Then he decided he didn't want to work. It was a rocky relationship. I finally got out, and purposed in my heart, I would not go near another irresponsible man.

That was the right move. I met a wonderful man in college, who was there to get a job and career. We fell in love, and after 32 years working for the same company, he retired two years ago. I also worked, being a teacher, until I became disabled. We both have good pensions, and although money was tight in the beginning, not giving up really helped us stay debt free and always have a good incoming salary.

I realize there are circumstances and careers in which it is hard to get a job. I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about continually ending up dating men who make excuses for themselves, and have no intention of really finding work. That is what you are attracting!

Or, is it that you are attracted to a certain type of man? Maybe a handsome, strong and athletic type that was enabled by his family, school and society his whole life? Never had to do anything at home, never thought for some reason he would not have to have a career some day? Maybe thought he could make it on his good looks or his athletic ability? You know the type.

Not to stereotype! My second son was a gifted athlete and very handsome. But we had high expectations of him at home, and he certainly was driven to perform in the sport of his choice. He also had some good friends who told him to get a good career. He became a chartered account. He met a hardworking young woman, who is now a doctor. All his friends also have careers and good jobs.

Hang around friends that are going out with men who have jobs or prospects. And if my speculation is totally wrong, I'm sorry. It just seems like there are really lots of good men, but you have to look for them!
Admittedly the male I am most concerned about is pretty much the only thing close to a "boyfriend" I've ever had. But I am happy to say that it is not irresponsibility that is the problem, as he currently has a job and is very work oriented.
 

EmilyNats

Senior Member
Jul 28, 2016
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#38
Wow man, that is so cool! Out of school at 17. Is that the norm in the USA or are you just clever? ;)
Lol It's not the norm, but I doubt I am more clever than anyone else my age. Homeschoolers just don't follow the usual procedures a lot of the time.
 
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Depleted

Guest
#39
Wow man, that is so cool! Out of school at 17. Is that the norm in the USA or are you just clever? ;)
In the US, if you're homeschooled, you probably are better educated than if you went to most public schools (including the good ones) and even the private schools. Taught using personal strengths from a teacher who knows you and a lot less time wasted promoting the propaganda that happens in academic circles. The real curriculum is promoted and has to be adhered to, but the school systems can't really enforce the crap they teach as asides.
 
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NewWine

Guest
#40
Not being a man, I can't say what men think...
In the case of my husband, all I can say is it was his birthday, and I asked him what he wanted to do for the day. He said I want to work out in the shop. I said you don't want to get out and do something fun instead? (being me, working in the dark danky shop isn't my idea of fun) He replied....working to make money, to support myself and my family, gives me a purpose which makes me happy, so working IS fun for me.
I get that. Because to me, growing/cooking foods that are healthy for him to eat, that he will also enjoy, or making sure he has neat clothes to wear, without stains and whatnot, keeping the household and business bills paid, ordering materials and such so he doesn't have to or even making sure the dishes are done and the kitchen isn't a petri dish and going to make someone sick...those things give me a purpose also, because they help him do what he loves. (if that makes sense)