ArtsieSteph's dad's cancer superthread

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Well it had gone down, but now towards the back of my throat is starting to swell on both sides. My throat hurts like a monster and it hurts just sitting here. I’m gonna have to make a doctors appointment.

Dad wise we’re getting used to things but they’re still an annoyance as far as the tube unclicking and pouring on Dad. I had a major panic attack yesterday for some reason when he coughed and some water came out the tube. I think it was like I saw anything come out so I just had a really weird visceral reaction.

Anyhow. Today is going good.
Panic attack? I'm impressed, and I'm not kidding.

When John was on the trach, sometimes mucus would come into his throat making him sound like he was hacking up a lung. The nurses had this suction they'd insert into the trach tube to pull it out, and got this brilliant idea to teach me how to use it. Panic attack at least suggest I was that worried about him. No, I didn't get that far, but I almost lost my lunch trying to do what they did. (Some of it had to do with worrying about hurting him. A lot of it had to do with I knew what was getting sucked out.) Worse yet, I didn't even have lunch to lose it. lol

Yeah, bodily fluids are going to cause visceral reactions to us. We're not nurses. And even nurses get grossed out the first time. (At least, I keep telling myself that.)

As for your throat? Obviously some kind of infection. Any extra antibiotics in the house until you can see a doctor? (It's Saturday, so doctor visit is probably off the table until next week.)
 

ArtsieSteph

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Yeah I may have to get more antibiotics from my doctor...or maybe use some I have left over from my last thing. Hmmm....

I kinda had a feeling like I was almost gonna get nauseous but I kinda pushed it aside.
 

ArtsieSteph

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So right now he’s getting good calories, but his throat is now so inflamed from the tube being there (or a possible cold) that his throat burns just swallowing pills. We don’t know what to do.

Thats a lot of us lately is “don’t know what to do.”
 

ArtsieSteph

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Daddy had a nosebleed and I'm freaking out. Does this mean he's gonna start coughing up blood or something!? He's Ok for now I just....I just have all this "I have no idea" energy and I don't wanna tell my mom for now because she worries so much as it is. I just.
 

ArtsieSteph

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Now dad is in this berserker mode of doing things for the future and saying like we may move, we may have to move in with my grandma, ect ect. I can’t keep him from stopping without shouting at him.
 

tourist

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Now dad is in this berserker mode of doing things for the future and saying like we may move, we may have to move in with my grandma, ect ect. I can’t keep him from stopping without shouting at him.
Maybe it's time to consider getting your own place.
 
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Now dad is in this berserker mode of doing things for the future and saying like we may move, we may have to move in with my grandma, ect ect. I can’t keep him from stopping without shouting at him.
It's panic mode. Perhaps look up how to deal with people that are panicking. But being really sick causes people to act in a lot of strange ways. My mother was chronically ill and had all kinds of odd reactions as well.
 

ArtsieSteph

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The crazy thing is he’s not outwardly distressed, he’s focused now. He learned as a young man to take any emergency he had from being nervous and use it to do something productive. He’s also I think listening to Christian stuff like music too but he’s saying sorta life serious stuff that is scaring me.
 

ArtsieSteph

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And especially now with our possible financial straights, moving out may not be feesable.
 
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So right now he’s getting good calories, but his throat is now so inflamed from the tube being there (or a possible cold) that his throat burns just swallowing pills. We don’t know what to do.

Thats a lot of us lately is “don’t know what to do.”
Crush the pills. Mix them in the feed. John didn't swallow a pill until he was off the feed.

I'm surprised he can swallow them at all with a hose going down his esophagus.

(Dang! The stuff doctors forget to tell us.)
 
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Now dad is in this berserker mode of doing things for the future and saying like we may move, we may have to move in with my grandma, ect ect. I can’t keep him from stopping without shouting at him.
Tell him what I told you.

Path <------> You <---------> Bridge.

You may have to move in with your grandmother. You may have to lose the house, the car, the computer. BUT today is not that day! Today you have a house. You have a bed. You have a sore throat from swallowing pills, but you're swallowing pills. Today is not the bridge. And you don't know if there is a bridge or if it is that bridge.

Big, big added bonus the rest of the world does not get -- We are the Lord's kids. He gives us all that we need and actually knows the difference between need and want. He is on the path with us, grabbing our hand to take us where we do not want to go, but he is taking us there for our good and his glory.

Understand this much. When John was on chemo, we were living on my income. My income was SSDI income. At that time it was $839 a month. Now $956 a month. Our mortgage was $550 a month. Our utility bills (water, gas, and electric) were $350 a month. Skip car insurance. Skip eating for that matter. It wasn't doable. Not that it was a close shave. It wasn't doable! The foreclosure came. Foreclosure is a statement from our mortgage company that told us if we did not pay what we owed we would lose the house in 90 days.

All that hit at once. And yet, we're still living in that same house, John did finish treatment, and he got "cured." Not "remission." "Cured."

If you ever need to know how that happened, PM me. I'm absolutely sure what happened was a bunch of miracles from God, and yet, when it came down to nitty-gritty, I went through an intense learning session on how to get the government to help us in record time. (I am a slow learner, but man, God really got me pumped up to learn fast then. lol) All because I wanted one thing. I wanted John to be in his own home, sleeping under his own covers, throwing up in his own toilet, and bathing with his own water. (Can't really say he could get a shower easily, since our drain pipe died then too, but I rigged up something so he could get one.) All while he was on treatment.

Damn the house! All we needed was a warm place that winter so he could stay on treatment. The house just happened to be the cheapest place we could live. ($550 for a mortgage is really cheaper than an apartment anymore.) And God worked it out that not only could we stay in the house, but we've kept it.

If money gets so tight you don't know what happens next, PM me. I know words like Welfare, HEMAP, and Medicaid. I also know how to get health insurance moving when they think he's not getting his next chemo shot until the New Year, which would have meant he would have had to start back at Week 1. Not. Happening! The insurance company was dealt with so fast, we actually got that next shot in the mail at 7 AM on Christmas Eve morning from Fed Ex, who was quite busy that day.

So, seriously. Path <-------> Bridge. Remind him today is today. God is handling tomorrow. His job is today!!!
 
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The crazy thing is he’s not outwardly distressed, he’s focused now. He learned as a young man to take any emergency he had from being nervous and use it to do something productive. He’s also I think listening to Christian stuff like music too but he’s saying sorta life serious stuff that is scaring me.
Pffft. No he didn't learn that. I mean he did, but then the Lord keeps stepping up our lessons.

When I was young, I learned that the Lord would provide me my next meal, even if I could only get a job paying $10 a week. I thought I learned to trust the Lord because of that.

Then John broken his back, and we were back to square one. And I thought I learned to trust the Lord then.

And then I became disabled, and had to again learn to trust the Lord.

And then John and his HepC hit for the next lesson, and I thought I learned it that time.

And then?

It hasn't let up yet. The Lord is determined to train us no matter what. You and your Dad just hit the next lesson.

Allow your Dad some freak out time. These lessons never get easy.

And, another thing. Some of this may be caused by the chemotherapy itself. Mom went all wonky at one point. Gram, (her mother), found her talking to her dad one night. It seems reasonable, except her dad had died a decade before. Another night, Gram found Mom burning her clothes in the fireplace because she was cold. And John? John had night terrors about "them over there." (As often as he talked about "them," when he slept, I wish he would have at least remembered who they were.)

It may go real wonky. Hopefully, it doesn't.
 

ArtsieSteph

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I think a hard thing in all this is that we've had such a cushy, sheltered life. And it seems like it's all on the verge of going away. I mean not REALLY but at the same time to my dad it probably is RIGHT there.
 

ArtsieSteph

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Dad has had a lot more coughing, and tends to have a bit more mucus. But it isn't bloody or anything which is almost weird...
 

ArtsieSteph

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Well yesterday went hilariously. He got his infusion which tends to really dry him out, and apparently that’s exactly what he needed. His throat felt great, he felt great, he was so confused xD It has been good.
 
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How about having him talk to his doctor for checking out if there is a drug that can keep him mucus free without negative side effects with the infusion?
 

ArtsieSteph

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We had a nutritionist come in saying that maybe like some papaya juice could cut it down, or maybe gargling salt water and baking soda.

But I do have to laugh because daddy was so worried about how he was gonna do with his infusion and God was like "you are gonna do fine."
 

ArtsieSteph

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Hey guys immediate prayer request. My dad has a low-grade fever of 99.4 and with cancer treatment any kind of fever is bad news. Please pray that that goes down during the night.
 

ArtsieSteph

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As of this morning he’s on the higher end of 98 which is no longer fever territory but I wish he was lower. Thank you all for your prayers I know it’s helping.
 

blue_ladybug

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Steph, normal body temp is 98.6... :)

As of this morning he’s on the higher end of 98 which is no longer fever territory but I wish he was lower. Thank you all for your prayers I know it’s helping.