Time to visit the in-laws

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AllenW

AllenW

Senior Member
#1
Apr 20, 2016
1,450
70
48
#1
I suffer from anxiety.
It's very bad at times, but even on good days, I feel the affects of it.
Once a year I am required by marriage to go visit the in-laws.
I use to do this out of love for my wife.
Now I do it as a requirement to keep the peace because no matter what happens, she doesn't understand what I go through.
The in-laws will not come visit us.
We are too far away, yet they are all healthy.
I do not get along with any of them.
I am suppose to go today for 4 days.
I woke up covered with itchy bumps all over my body.
This happens with anxiety attacks.
I feel tense, edgy just talking about it.


Should I say something to my wife?
 
AllenW

AllenW

Senior Member
#2
Apr 20, 2016
1,450
70
48
#2
AllenW said:
I suffer from anxiety.
It's very bad at times, but even on good days, I feel the affects of it.
Once a year I am required by marriage to go visit the in-laws.
I use to do this out of love for my wife.
Now I do it as a requirement to keep the peace because no matter what happens, she doesn't understand what I go through.
The in-laws will not come visit us.
We are too far away, yet they are all healthy.
I do not get along with any of them.
I am suppose to go today for 4 days.
I woke up covered with itchy bumps all over my body.
This happens with anxiety attacks.
I feel tense, edgy just talking about it.


Should I say something to my wife?
Click to expand...
I changed my mind.
I can't say nothing.
I see her getting ready and how important it is to her.
 
M

Miri

Guest
#3
#3
Don't take this the wrong way, but at your age if you can't get on with the in-laws,
there is little hope for everyone else! :)
 
blue_ladybug

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
#4
Feb 21, 2014
70,869
9,601
113
#4
Ahh, the dreaded in-laws.. lol.. I'll tell you what people tell me on Christmas and Thanksgiving when I don't want to spend time with family. "It's just for one day, it won't kill you, and it may be your last holiday with mom and dad". Only replace "mom and Dad" with In laws.. lol

Considering my parents are both in their mid-80's, any day very could well be my last day with them. So even if you don't get along with them, suck it up and do it for your wife.
 
mailmandan

mailmandan

Senior Member
#5
Apr 7, 2014
25,043
13,049
113
58
#5
blue_ladybug said:
Ahh, the dreaded in-laws.. lol.. I'll tell you what people tell me on Christmas and Thanksgiving when I don't want to spend time with family. "It's just for one day, it won't kill you, and it may be your last holiday with mom and dad". Only replace "mom and Dad" with In laws.. lol

Considering my parents are both in their mid-80's, any day very could well be my last day with them. So even if you don't get along with them, suck it up and do it for your wife.
Click to expand...
Amen! Happy wife, happy life. ;)
 
FranC

FranC

Banned
#6
Apr 30, 2016
5,162
75
0
#6
mailmandan said:
Amen! Happy wife, happy life. ;)
Click to expand...
Hey Mailmandan,
If I understood the OP, it's not

Happy Wife
Happy Life

It's more like:

Happy Wife
Unhappy life

!!

Maybe the wife should go alone?
Anybody agree?

Fran
 
FranC

FranC

Banned
#7
Apr 30, 2016
5,162
75
0
#7
Miri said:
Don't take this the wrong way, but at your age if you can't get on with the in-laws,
there is little hope for everyone else! :)
Click to expand...
Hey Miri,
I'm an in-law too (aren't we all in some way or other)

But I find it easier to get along with EVERYONE ELSE!

Fran
 
mailmandan

mailmandan

Senior Member
#8
Apr 7, 2014
25,043
13,049
113
58
#8
FranC said:
Hey Mailmandan,
If I understood the OP, it's not

Happy Wife
Happy Life

It's more like:

Happy Wife
Unhappy life

!!

Maybe the wife should go alone?
Anybody agree?

Fran
Click to expand...
Marriage is give and take and requires sacrifice at times. ;)
 
Willie-T

Willie-T

Banned
#9
Feb 7, 2015
22,418
413
0
#9
Allen,
Just try to keep in mind that you are really just coming to see Sue and me, and seeing them is just a small part of it.
 
JosephsDreams

JosephsDreams

Senior Member
#10
Dec 31, 2015
4,313
467
83
#10
AllenW said:
I suffer from anxiety.
It's very bad at times, but even on good days, I feel the affects of it.
Once a year I am required by marriage to go visit the in-laws.
I use to do this out of love for my wife.
Now I do it as a requirement to keep the peace because no matter what happens, she doesn't understand what I go through.
The in-laws will not come visit us.
We are too far away, yet they are all healthy.
I do not get along with any of them.
I am suppose to go today for 4 days.
I woke up covered with itchy bumps all over my body.
This happens with anxiety attacks.
I feel tense, edgy just talking about it.


Should I say something to my wife?
Click to expand...
You want the in-laws to come to you? Here is how.
Have your wife call them and tell them you guys are breaking up. Bad marital issues, etc.
Have her say that your taking everything.
That she needs them to come to your place and talk to the two of you to see if they can help work it out.
Once they get there, say "see that wasn't so bad. You can travel. Lets alternate every other year for you coming to us and us coming to you."
MAKE sure you show them a good time (after they get over their anger) so they will come back again.
 
AllenW

AllenW

Senior Member
#11
Apr 20, 2016
1,450
70
48
#11
Miri said:
Don't take this the wrong way, but at your age if you can't get on with the in-laws,
there is little hope for everyone else! :)
Click to expand...
I agree.
We have uber cabs down here.
Put her in one of them and they'll take her anywhere.
Let the brothers pay for it and I'll get a few days off.
 
AllenW

AllenW

Senior Member
#12
Apr 20, 2016
1,450
70
48
#12
Willie-T said:
Allen,
Just try to keep in mind that you are really just coming to see Sue and me, and seeing them is just a small part of it.
Click to expand...
Now that is prophecy.
Okay, I agree.
 
AllenW

AllenW

Senior Member
#13
Apr 20, 2016
1,450
70
48
#13
JosephsDreams said:
You want the in-laws to come to you? Here is how.
Have your wife call them and tell them you guys are breaking up. Bad marital issues, etc.
Have her say that your taking everything.
That she needs them to come to your place and talk to the two of you to see if they can help work it out.
Once they get there, say "see that wasn't so bad. You can travel. Lets alternate every other year for you coming to us and us coming to you."
MAKE sure you show them a good time (after they get over their anger) so they will come back again.
Click to expand...
Lol, I don't want them back again and I already owe them a year.
 
FranC

FranC

Banned
#14
Apr 30, 2016
5,162
75
0
#14
JosephsDreams said:
You want the in-laws to come to you? Here is how.
Have your wife call them and tell them you guys are breaking up. Bad marital issues, etc.
Have her say that your taking everything.
That she needs them to come to your place and talk to the two of you to see if they can help work it out.
Once they get there, say "see that wasn't so bad. You can travel. Lets alternate every other year for you coming to us and us coming to you."
MAKE sure you show them a good time (after they get over their anger) so they will come back again.
Click to expand...
Pretty sneaky, but it sounds like it might work!!
 
AllenW

AllenW

Senior Member
#15
Apr 20, 2016
1,450
70
48
#15
AllenW said:
Lol, I don't want them back again and I already owe them a year.
Click to expand...
How would you all like to sit with a 70 year old women who uses the F word day and night and won't stop for nothing for the next 4 days?
And that's the easy part of the visit.
 
FranC

FranC

Banned
#16
Apr 30, 2016
5,162
75
0
#16
AllenW said:
Now that is prophecy.
Okay, I agree.
Click to expand...
Yes. Spend lots of time with Willie_T.
He sounds nice...

You must take the fat, with the meat...
 
FranC

FranC

Banned
#17
Apr 30, 2016
5,162
75
0
#17
For AllenW
AND To Whom It May Concern...

[video=youtube;P0O3gZVUp9o]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P0O3gZVUp9o[/video]
 
JosephsDreams

JosephsDreams

Senior Member
#18
Dec 31, 2015
4,313
467
83
#18
AllenW said:
How would you all like to sit with a 70 year old women who uses the F word day and night and won't stop for nothing for the next 4 days?
And that's the easy part of the visit.
Click to expand...
Your a Christian. I am assuming at some point you said you wanted to be as Christ like as possible. Your just gonna have to lug that cross around for the week they are here.
But I am not saying it is easy...
 
88

88

Senior Member
#19
Nov 14, 2016
3,517
77
48
#19
AllenW said:
I suffer from anxiety.
It's very bad at times, but even on good days, I feel the affects of it.
Once a year I am required by marriage to go visit the in-laws.
I use to do this out of love for my wife.
Now I do it as a requirement to keep the peace because no matter what happens, she doesn't understand what I go through.
The in-laws will not come visit us.
We are too far away, yet they are all healthy.
I do not get along with any of them.
I am suppose to go today for 4 days.
I woke up covered with itchy bumps all over my body.
This happens with anxiety attacks.
I feel tense, edgy just talking about it.


Should I say something to my wife?
Click to expand...
****(praying)---- find Grace to help in time of need----find something fun and positive in the problem...
 
88

88

Senior Member
#20
Nov 14, 2016
3,517
77
48
#20
88 said:
****(praying)---- find Grace to help in time of need----find something fun and positive in the problem...
Click to expand...
*** telling your wife probably won' t help---- if she is opposed to going maybe you can work out something (praying)..
 
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