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Thread: so confused and stressed a little...

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    Default so confused and stressed a little...

    I am having problems with trying to map a plan with my next year or so in life so to speak.. I am having trouble deciding life situations like my living situations, my school, future work, etc... I know i am overwhelming myself by thinking of 90 things at a time but that's how i have always been. I almost feel like if i don't have some kind of plan i panic more. Lately my mind on what to do has been all over the place. The medical care in N.Y. is getting horrible and almost worthless in a lot of aspects. I have a friend in Georgia that tells me she is getting treated very well from her doctors. But I know i do not want to leave my kids behind for many reasons. then we have my back being a pain that one week seems to be okay then the next is in a major flare and back and forth. so when I feel good i am like yes i can do anything. then it flares up or goes out and I am like Lord please I can't bare this or barely move.. I just need prayers that maybe I can get some help from the Lord to figure things out and make me at least feel less anxious... p.s. I have been trying to quit smoking again for the thousandth time ughhh It has been 4 days and I have cheated about 5 times or so .... my husband has no interest in quitting and will smoke around me so it is making it very difficult plus the stress I am feeling. I pray i just make it this time I am using a app. to track my smoking so maybe that will help me follow through this time...
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    Default Re: so confused and stressed a little...

    Quote Originally Posted by jenniferand2 View Post
    I am having problems with trying to map a plan with my next year or so in life so to speak.. I am having trouble deciding life situations like my living situations, my school, future work, etc... I know i am overwhelming myself by thinking of 90 things at a time but that's how i have always been. I almost feel like if i don't have some kind of plan i panic more. Lately my mind on what to do has been all over the place. The medical care in N.Y. is getting horrible and almost worthless in a lot of aspects. I have a friend in Georgia that tells me she is getting treated very well from her doctors. But I know i do not want to leave my kids behind for many reasons. then we have my back being a pain that one week seems to be okay then the next is in a major flare and back and forth. so when I feel good i am like yes i can do anything. then it flares up or goes out and I am like Lord please I can't bare this or barely move.. I just need prayers that maybe I can get some help from the Lord to figure things out and make me at least feel less anxious... p.s. I have been trying to quit smoking again for the thousandth time ughhh It has been 4 days and I have cheated about 5 times or so .... my husband has no interest in quitting and will smoke around me so it is making it very difficult plus the stress I am feeling. I pray i just make it this time I am using a app. to track my smoking so maybe that will help me follow through this time...
    I am an addict and trying to quit smoking too. Your husband should be more sensitive and to not smoke around you and support you also in the other areas of your life. I believe that you would definitely benefit from a clean break from where you are now living and the conditions you have to endure. I used to live in Michigan but left in 1985 for Florida so now I consider myself a southern big city boy. Nicotine is one of the most addictive substances there is and that makes it so extremely hard to quit and put this habit behind you. I understand this full well. At least we're both not in denial anymore. Yes, the struggle is real.
    M & M's melt in your mouth and not in your hands.

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    Default Re: so confused and stressed a little...

    Quote Originally Posted by tourist View Post
    I am an addict and trying to quit smoking too. Your husband should be more sensitive and to not smoke around you and support you also in the other areas of your life. I believe that you would definitely benefit from a clean break from where you are now living and the conditions you have to endure. I used to live in Michigan but left in 1985 for Florida so now I consider myself a southern big city boy. Nicotine is one of the most addictive substances there is and that makes it so extremely hard to quit and put this habit behind you. I understand this full well. At least we're both not in denial anymore. Yes, the struggle is real.
    thank you so much.. I am trying one day at a time.. that is all I can do.
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    Default Re: so confused and stressed a little...

    Quote Originally Posted by jenniferand2 View Post
    I am having problems with trying to map a plan with my next year or so in life so to speak.. I am having trouble deciding life situations like my living situations, my school, future work, etc... I know i am overwhelming myself by thinking of 90 things at a time but that's how i have always been. I almost feel like if i don't have some kind of plan i panic more. Lately my mind on what to do has been all over the place. The medical care in N.Y. is getting horrible and almost worthless in a lot of aspects. I have a friend in Georgia that tells me she is getting treated very well from her doctors. But I know i do not want to leave my kids behind for many reasons. then we have my back being a pain that one week seems to be okay then the next is in a major flare and back and forth. so when I feel good i am like yes i can do anything. then it flares up or goes out and I am like Lord please I can't bare this or barely move.. I just need prayers that maybe I can get some help from the Lord to figure things out and make me at least feel less anxious... p.s. I have been trying to quit smoking again for the thousandth time ughhh It has been 4 days and I have cheated about 5 times or so .... my husband has no interest in quitting and will smoke around me so it is making it very difficult plus the stress I am feeling. I pray i just make it this time I am using a app. to track my smoking so maybe that will help me follow through this time...
    I am so incredibly proud of you! 5 cigs in 4 days? That's like finding out you are genius brilliant! You're going to pull that off! (I'd tell you why I think that, but to tell you that just gives you a negative niggle in your ear that won't help you stop.)

    Realize something important though -- nicotine is a downer... literally. It mellows out the user. Sooo, when you're not using the downer as much that sets your brain into overdrive. Kind of like wondering why your brain is flying a million miles a minute after drinking five mugs of coffee. The two are connected. So, give yourself a break on the million-miles-a-minute brain while quitting. Let it, but also don't be governed by it. (Just knowing why helps you... if for no other reason than at least you know you're not nuts. lol)

    Truthfully, it's August. No school in August, right? So nothing to worry about there. Just moved, so you're not going to move again anyway for a while. You're probably not even done unpacking. (AND, if you are? No wonder your back is killing you! Slow down!)

    And, yeah, NYS really sucks healthcare wise. BUT it's not just NY. Just about every state, (I suspect ALL states), suck healthcare wise anymore when it comes to pain. The government runs healthcare now. Don't be fooled thinking it's going to get better just because we have a new president. Politicians are idiots who think we're all idiots and need to be taken care of to protect us from our idioticacy, so the rules have been set up nationally. One of the rules is that because 3% of people in pain become addicted to pain pills, let's just stop giving everyone pain pills or deal with pain in any conceivable way without the government having a hand in deciding how long they're allowed to be treated for pain.

    And it gets worse than New York. There are places down south and out west that have managed to chase out all pain specialists. Doctors prescribe pain meds for people who were operated on in the last week and the government tells pharmacies that they can't fulfill that prescription because doctors should never prescribe pain meds. The lunatics are running the asylum.

    That's in all 50 states. Your friend may tell you GA is better, but does she have the exact same problems you have? Doubtful. And is this getting any better soon? IDK, but I'll tell you the name of the first President that "helped" me by making it worse at higher prices for me -- George H.W. Bush! (I'm a conservative, so don't think this is a liberal complaining about conservatives. I'm a conservative complaining about politicians!)

    So,
    1. Quitting smoking makes your brain go into overdrive.
    2. It's August so you can't do anything about school right now anyway, other than pick classes.
    3. You just moved, so you're not moving again.
    4. All your troubles won't disappear overnight, so it's not like delaying worrying about them is not giving you enough time to worry about them. They'll still be there, even if you have to handle them one at a time, instead of solve them all by 8 AM August 3rd. So, feel free to rest on trying to solve all at once, and figure out one at a time.

    You already know you have just moved, so just skip that one. You won't be moving again until graduation. Just call that "settled for now." The not-smoking will drive you wild, but just consider that one as something you have to go through that won't be pleasant. That leaves figuring out what classes to take next semester.

    One problem and one only. And it's August, so that gives you your timeline for when it has to be resolved.


    When you haven't smoked for a year, asked me about why I think you're a genius and why I'm so proud of you. I can tell you then.
    jenniferand2 and Laish like this.
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    And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. Rom. 8:28

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    Default Re: so confused and stressed a little...

    thanks Lynn I have gone from balling my eyes out for no reason to going like you said a thousand miles a minute. it is very difficult.. I pray I make it this time. I don't want to spend my final days hacking up my lungs.... come back to this post in one year lets see what we have to say lol..
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    Default Re: so confused and stressed a little...

    Quote Originally Posted by Depleted View Post
    I am so incredibly proud of you! 5 cigs in 4 days? That's like finding out you are genius brilliant! You're going to pull that off! (I'd tell you why I think that, but to tell you that just gives you a negative niggle in your ear that won't help you stop.)

    Realize something important though -- nicotine is a downer... literally. It mellows out the user. Sooo, when you're not using the downer as much that sets your brain into overdrive. Kind of like wondering why your brain is flying a million miles a minute after drinking five mugs of coffee. The two are connected. So, give yourself a break on the million-miles-a-minute brain while quitting. Let it, but also don't be governed by it. (Just knowing why helps you... if for no other reason than at least you know you're not nuts. lol)

    Truthfully, it's August. No school in August, right? So nothing to worry about there. Just moved, so you're not going to move again anyway for a while. You're probably not even done unpacking. (AND, if you are? No wonder your back is killing you! Slow down!)

    And, yeah, NYS really sucks healthcare wise. BUT it's not just NY. Just about every state, (I suspect ALL states), suck healthcare wise anymore when it comes to pain. The government runs healthcare now. Don't be fooled thinking it's going to get better just because we have a new president. Politicians are idiots who think we're all idiots and need to be taken care of to protect us from our idioticacy, so the rules have been set up nationally. One of the rules is that because 3% of people in pain become addicted to pain pills, let's just stop giving everyone pain pills or deal with pain in any conceivable way without the government having a hand in deciding how long they're allowed to be treated for pain.

    And it gets worse than New York. There are places down south and out west that have managed to chase out all pain specialists. Doctors prescribe pain meds for people who were operated on in the last week and the government tells pharmacies that they can't fulfill that prescription because doctors should never prescribe pain meds. The lunatics are running the asylum.

    That's in all 50 states. Your friend may tell you GA is better, but does she have the exact same problems you have? Doubtful. And is this getting any better soon? IDK, but I'll tell you the name of the first President that "helped" me by making it worse at higher prices for me -- George H.W. Bush! (I'm a conservative, so don't think this is a liberal complaining about conservatives. I'm a conservative complaining about politicians!)

    So,
    1. Quitting smoking makes your brain go into overdrive.
    2. It's August so you can't do anything about school right now anyway, other than pick classes.
    3. You just moved, so you're not moving again.
    4. All your troubles won't disappear overnight, so it's not like delaying worrying about them is not giving you enough time to worry about them. They'll still be there, even if you have to handle them one at a time, instead of solve them all by 8 AM August 3rd. So, feel free to rest on trying to solve all at once, and figure out one at a time.

    You already know you have just moved, so just skip that one. You won't be moving again until graduation. Just call that "settled for now." The not-smoking will drive you wild, but just consider that one as something you have to go through that won't be pleasant. That leaves figuring out what classes to take next semester.

    One problem and one only. And it's August, so that gives you your timeline for when it has to be resolved.


    When you haven't smoked for a year, asked me about why I think you're a genius and why I'm so proud of you. I can tell you then.
    My late wife had horrible psoriatic arthritis but fortunately had doctors that understood pain and were not afraid to prescribe narcotics. Without pain medication she would have not had any quality of life at all. The government should just address dealing with those that obtain narcotics by fraudulent means and not to dictate how those in horrible distress should manage their pain. I believe that all pain medication should be sold over the counter without any government interference whatsoever except for perhaps limiting the cost that a manufacturer can sell the drugs to make them affordable to the average citizen that choses to treat their own pain in the best way that they know how.
    jenniferand2 likes this.
    M & M's melt in your mouth and not in your hands.

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    Default Re: so confused and stressed a little...

    I pray the lord helps you overcome your smoking situation. Also when planning things make sure it's according to Gods will for you. As the scriptures tells us in Matthew not to be anxious for tomorrow, for tomorrow will care for itself.Many times people get in the habit of planning for years in advance when none of us are promised tomorrow. Each day is a blessing.
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    Default Re: so confused and stressed a little...

    Quote Originally Posted by tourist View Post
    My late wife had horrible psoriatic arthritis but fortunately had doctors that understood pain and were not afraid to prescribe narcotics. Without pain medication she would have not had any quality of life at all. The government should just address dealing with those that obtain narcotics by fraudulent means and not to dictate how those in horrible distress should manage their pain. I believe that all pain medication should be sold over the counter without any government interference whatsoever except for perhaps limiting the cost that a manufacturer can sell the drugs to make them affordable to the average citizen that choses to treat their own pain in the best way that they know how.
    I agree my tailbone has been real messed up lately i went to my doctor and told her i was in way more pain because it is popping out of place. she basically laughed at me and gave me a slip for another x ray like you already have to many images of proof that my joints are basically bone on bone and my spine is so degenerated i can barley walk some days so horrible. I am about to get a enhanced i.d. and drive to Canada once or twice a month and buy tylonal threes... they sell them with out a script..
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    Default Re: so confused and stressed a little...

    Hi Jennifer,

    Let me see if I can help
    Quote Originally Posted by jenniferand2 View Post
    I am having problems with trying to map a plan with my next year or so in life so to speak..
    Why don't you focus on just next week for now, and then focus just on each day. Mapping out a plan for one year is unrealistic.
    I am having trouble deciding life situations like my living situations, my school, future work, etc...
    So what you should do is get a legal pad and make two columns. On the left write ISSUE and on the right SOLUTION. Then sit down and put everything on paper rather than carrying it in your head. Once that's done, your mind will be clear and unburdened.
    I know i am overwhelming myself by thinking of 90 things at a time but that's how i have always been.
    Since you know this already, why don't you quit altogether. Now that you have written everything down you can quit.
    I almost feel like if i don't have some kind of plan i panic more.
    Now we come to the heart of the issue. Beside each issue place a number which represents PRIORITY. So now you can create another chart with three columns: PRIORITY ISSUE SOLUTION.
    Lately my mind on what to do has been all over the place.
    It won't be any longer if you do this carefully and diligently (as though your life depended on it)


    The medical care in N.Y. is getting horrible and almost worthless in a lot of aspects. I have a friend in Georgia that tells me she is getting treated very well from her doctors. But I know i do not want to leave my kids behind for many reasons.
    So you already resolved this issue. You will put up with awful medical care rather than move away from your kids.

    then we have my back being a pain that one week seems to be okay then the next is in a major flare and back and forth. so when I feel good i am like yes i can do anything. then it flares up or goes out and I am like Lord please I can't bare this or barely move..
    Evidently your current medical team has failed you. So you might have to find someone else to determine the cause and then provide the remedy.

    I just need prayers that maybe I can get some help from the Lord to figure things out and make me at least feel less anxious...
    Since the Lord has already told you "Be anxious for nothing..." you just have stop being anxious.

    p.s. I have been trying to quit smoking again for the thousandth time ughhh It has been 4 days and I have cheated about 5 times or so .... my husband has no interest in quitting and will smoke around me so it is making it very difficult plus the stress I am feeling. I pray i just make it this time I am using a app. to track my smoking so maybe that will help me follow through this time...
    So now what you can do is:

    1. Sit down with your husband with a pack (or carton) of cigarettes and the receipt for that.
    2. Calculate the cost of each cigarette.
    3. Take the equivalent amount of paper dollars out of your purse.
    4. Then take out your lighter and literally set those dollars on fire and put them in the ashtray.
    5. This might be all it takes to decide that you are through with smoking.
    6. Then take the money you would be spending daily on cigarettes and put it into a piggy bank.
    jenniferand2 and EarnestQ like this.

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    Default Re: so confused and stressed a little...

    Quote Originally Posted by jenniferand2 View Post
    I am having problems with trying to map a plan with my next year or so in life so to speak.. I am having trouble deciding life situations like my living situations, my school, future work, etc... I know i am overwhelming myself by thinking of 90 things at a time but that's how i have always been. I almost feel like if i don't have some kind of plan i panic more. Lately my mind on what to do has been all over the place. The medical care in N.Y. is getting horrible and almost worthless in a lot of aspects. I have a friend in Georgia that tells me she is getting treated very well from her doctors. But I know i do not want to leave my kids behind for many reasons. then we have my back being a pain that one week seems to be okay then the next is in a major flare and back and forth. so when I feel good i am like yes i can do anything. then it flares up or goes out and I am like Lord please I can't bare this or barely move.. I just need prayers that maybe I can get some help from the Lord to figure things out and make me at least feel less anxious... p.s. I have been trying to quit smoking again for the thousandth time ughhh It has been 4 days and I have cheated about 5 times or so .... my husband has no interest in quitting and will smoke around me so it is making it very difficult plus the stress I am feeling. I pray i just make it this time I am using a app. to track my smoking so maybe that will help me follow through this time...
    ***(praying)***
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    Default Re: so confused and stressed a little...

    I pray for you that the Lord will give you peace in your situation right now in Jesus name. The Lord says that we need not worry about tomorrow for tomorrow has its own problem. But, trust in the Lord and do good. Then you will live safely in the land and prosper. Take delight in the Lord, and He will give you your heart's desires. Commit everything you do to the Lord. Trust Him, and He will help you. (Psalm 37:3-5).

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    Default Re: so confused and stressed a little...

    Remember to take it one thing and one day at a time.

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    Default Re: so confused and stressed a little...

    Quote Originally Posted by jenniferand2 View Post
    I am having problems with trying to map a plan with my next year or so in life so to speak.. I am having trouble deciding life situations like my living situations, my school, future work, etc... I know i am overwhelming myself by thinking of 90 things at a time but that's how i have always been. I almost feel like if i don't have some kind of plan i panic more. Lately my mind on what to do has been all over the place. The medical care in N.Y. is getting horrible and almost worthless in a lot of aspects. I have a friend in Georgia that tells me she is getting treated very well from her doctors. But I know i do not want to leave my kids behind for many reasons. then we have my back being a pain that one week seems to be okay then the next is in a major flare and back and forth. so when I feel good i am like yes i can do anything. then it flares up or goes out and I am like Lord please I can't bare this or barely move.. I just need prayers that maybe I can get some help from the Lord to figure things out and make me at least feel less anxious... p.s. I have been trying to quit smoking again for the thousandth time ughhh It has been 4 days and I have cheated about 5 times or so .... my husband has no interest in quitting and will smoke around me so it is making it very difficult plus the stress I am feeling. I pray i just make it this time I am using a app. to track my smoking so maybe that will help me follow through this time...
    Jesus certainly taught to do one day at a time by trusting God as your Father to take care of you & your tomorrows.

    Matthew 6:25 Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than meat, and the body than raiment? 26 Behold the fowls of the air: for they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feedeth them. Are ye not much better than they? 27 Which of you by taking thought can add one cubit unto his stature? 28 And why take ye thought for raiment? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they toil not, neither do they spin: 29 And yet I say unto you, That even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. 30 Wherefore, if God so clothe the grass of the field, which to day is, and to morrow is cast into the oven, shall he not much more clothe you, O ye of little faith? 31 Therefore take no thought, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed? 32 (For after all these things do the Gentiles seek for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things. 33 But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.34 Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.

    James kinda touched on doing things one day at a time and when making plans for tomorrow, just leave it to God as only He can bring it about.

    James 4:13 Go to now, ye that say, To day or to morrow we will go into such a city, and continue there a year, and buy and sell, and get gain: 14 Whereas ye know not what shall be on the morrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapour, that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away. 15 For that ye ought to say, If the Lord will, we shall live, and do this, or that. 16 But now ye rejoice in your boastings: all such rejoicing is evil. 17 Therefore to him that knoweth to do good, and doeth it not, to him it is sin.

    I need to rely on the Lord all the time to help me be content, to keep me from my sins, to do good, and leave the problems of tomorrows in His hands.

    jenniferand2 likes this.

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