Twin sister is a violent, agressive bully. Mom's a drunk and Dad's mean and hurtful

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
E

EvieD

Guest
#1
#1
My twin hit me in the face the other day, which sparked my mom's drinking and my dad just doesn't care. I can't take anymore of the toxic path we're on. I just don't know what to do at this point. It seems no one wants to change but me, I've been reading scriptures and encouraging counseling but no one wants to do that. It's like they forget and move on which it a dangerous cycle I'm 19 and I don't know what to do any advice? All is appreciated
 
D

Depleted

Guest
#2
#2
You're 19? Why are you still living there? You were free to move out last year.

Counseling would end up telling you to move out anyway. You're 19. You're supposed to move out from home, unless you have a good reason to stay. I didn't hear any such reason.
 
N

NoNameMcgee

Guest
#3
#3
Depleted said:
You're 19? Why are you still living there? You were free to move out last year.

Counseling would end up telling you to move out anyway. You're 19. You're supposed to move out from home, unless you have a good reason to stay. I didn't hear any such reason.
Click to expand...
lynn may sound harsh


but she is right....

it might be time to leave the nest
 
PrynceNY

PrynceNY

Banned
#4
Aug 16, 2016
2,184
62
0
#4
Continue to seek God & pray for your family. Sorry to hear you and your sister had a confrontation. Forgive her & hold no bitterness against her. If you have been trying your best to help your family and they refuse to change leave it in the hands of the Lord
 
blue_ladybug

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
#5
Feb 21, 2014
70,869
9,601
113
#5
You're 19! Move out and stop subjecting yourself to it..

If you stay, you have no one to blame but yourself, for staying in the middle of the drama.
 
Dino246

Dino246

Senior Member
#6
Jun 30, 2015
24,672
13,364
113
#6
EvieD said:
My twin hit me in the face the other day, which sparked my mom's drinking and my dad just doesn't care. I can't take anymore of the toxic path we're on. I just don't know what to do at this point. It seems no one wants to change but me, I've been reading scriptures and encouraging counseling but no one wants to do that. It's like they forget and move on which it a dangerous cycle I'm 19 and I don't know what to do any advice? All is appreciated
Click to expand...
Welcome to CC!

As you can see, you'll get good advice here, though it may not always be what you want to hear. I'll add one thought: stop trying to fix your family, because you can't. All you would succeed in doing is hurting yourself... and you would need more help as a result. Get out quickly, and pray for them, but otherwise put some distance between you and them... until and unless they repent and change.
 
U

Ugly

Guest
#7
#7
Have to agree with Dino. It's good that you have first made an effort to help your family, but you also have to be wise enoigh to know when you're beating your head on a brick wall, hoping to knock it down.
It's time to leave. And if you aren't able to now, then it's time to start making plans and taking action to move on that direction.
Keep praying for them, but be free of them, as well.
 
tourist

tourist

Senior Member
#8
Mar 13, 2014
41,299
16,294
113
69
Tennessee
#8
If you're not yet working then get a job, save what you can and plan for the day that you leave this toxic environment, sooner rather than later. Maybe you can meet someone at work that would make a suitable roommate to lighten the financial burden. Keep reading scripture and talk to God everyday. He understands your situation and wants you to have life and have it more abundantly. Hopefully, this site will become a safe haven for you to escape the madness. Glad to have you join us. Welcome to CC.
 
E

EvieD

Guest
#9
#9
I am fully aware of that, have my reasons in which I stay
 
E

EvieD

Guest
#10
#10
It's not that easy! To just move out
 
E

EvieD

Guest
#11
#11
For the individuals who are telling me to just up and move, it's not that easy and I do plan on moving when I start college in the fall, thank you for all the advice.
 
D

Depleted

Guest
#12
#12
You're right. It's not that easy. There is a 15 year old women on this site who has a bad home life, so she's already working on plans to leave. Of course, you could have been doing that four years ago too, so it already would have happened.

I'm guessing your alcoholic mother and doesn't-care father are footing the tuition? Is that the complication?

Yeah, been there myself, (except just Dad and a little brother by then.) What's complicated is you already made your decision. So have all your family members. The hard part -- you have to love and honor them even after they made their decisions. Now that's one you'll need God's help with.
 
E

EvieD

Guest
#13
#13
Thank you for the advice, tough to hear but I'm glad you did.
 
U

Ugly

Guest
#14
#14
EvieD said:
For the individuals who are telling me to just up and move, it's not that easy and I do plan on moving when I start college in the fall, thank you for all the advice.
Click to expand...
No one said it was easy. You asked for advise, people gave you what they believed was the best advise. Your way of repaying them is by treating them like idiots that are clueless what it's like to move out on your own, despite them being at least twice your age. Great way to show gratitude to those who took the time to try and help.
 
E

EvieD

Guest
#15
#15
Actually no, I thanked thim for all the advice they gave. I didn't mean to come off disrespectful if so my apologies to all who felt that way
 
M

mar09

Senior Member
#16
Sep 17, 2014
4,927
1,259
113
#16
No, evie, I didnt think you were. I happen to live in a country where unmarried children can live at home esp when they havent found work yet, but some working adults still stay and help w/ younger siblings, for example. It is sad to hear that your sis isnt a 'friend' to you, but as some said pray more abt the matter. If there is a way you can move before autumn, it may be best. If not, i hope there was a way to reach your sis, and she is your twin too! Dont you have some common friends or people from church who can reach out to here? She has reasons to be violet and aggressive and needs help.

I cannot say very much now, but would like to welcome you to the site too.
 
E

EvieD

Guest
#17
#17
Thank you so much, I do a job and I do start college in the fall and that's when I will moving out. It's a what goes on in this house, stays in this house type thing, that is why I came here so seek advice from people who don't know the situation.
 
Fenner

Fenner

Senior Member
#18
Jan 26, 2013
7,507
111
0
#18
It's not always easy to just move, but it sounds like you're on the right path. What I want to say about your sister is, if she's violent with you press charges. I know that would be difficult to do but it would send a message, no one has a right to harm you. Best wishes to you.
 
P

pckts

Guest
#19
#19
EvieD said:
It's not that easy! To just move out
Click to expand...
Yeah they either don't understand how difficult it is to make a living just paying rent and feeding yourself at 19 with minimum wage, or they want you to fall into debt like they did. You're getting an education, that's more important than "leaving the nest" at this point in your life.
 
Last edited:
E

EvieD

Guest
#20
#20
Thank you so much
 
You must log in or register to reply here.