Is this the end?

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nicoleh

Guest
#1
#1
Hello,
I found out last week that my Pastor husband had an affair. I am devastated. This happened 9 yrs ago as well. I am confused whether to seperate or allow him to walk through a restoration process. Any thoughts? Please keep me and my 4 kids in prayer....thanks
 
M

mrpower

Guest
#2
#2
There are so many verses that could take you one way or another... Bit what I would say is; Pray without ceasing. Do not allow your mind to go down the road of worst case scenarios. Talk to God when you would be idly thinking about the situation. In everything remember the Lord. I do not believe that anyone here can give you true advise whether to stay with, or leave your husband without hearing something from God for you, and I would be utterly weary of anyone giving such advise without being intimately aware of your situation, coupled with much prayer.
But I believe most of all that he is your husband, and it is up to God to realize whether or not he remains as your husband.
I only say this as a child of 4, with no experience other than one who watched his father deal with an adulterous mother, and how he responded in the Lord.
But above all else, remember the Lord for your childrens sake. The one thing I love my earthly father for more than anything else; Is no matter how painful it was, he always put the Lord first in all he did for us. And for that I am the Christian I am today, and owe him more than I can ever say on a screen.

My prayers are with you and your children. Much love and God bless.
 
C

charisenexcelcis

Guest
#3
#3
nicoleh said:
Hello,
I found out last week that my Pastor husband had an affair. I am devastated. This happened 9 yrs ago as well. I am confused whether to seperate or allow him to walk through a restoration process. Any thoughts? Please keep me and my 4 kids in prayer....thanks
Click to expand...
I think that this is a choice that you must make. Remember that nothing that anyone else does can undo what God wants to do through you. God's calling on you was done knowing that your husband would fail. I would advise that unless God specifically tells you to stay with him, that you separate. Restoration will not work unless you are absolutely behind it. Separate now, and God can still bring you back together later. Stay together now without being sure and the hurt and bitterness will consume you. One other thing: your husband's unfaithfulness has not undone anything that you have done unto the Lord. He has diminished himself, not you. I am praying for you and your children. If there is anything more I can do, please let me know.
 
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nicoleh

Guest
#4
#4
Thanks for all your advise and prayers! I know in Christ there is peace.
 
S

singlemom080

Guest
#5
#5
I have also went through something similar and you need to give it time, if hes willing to work and make positive changes maybe but time apart will give you a good idea of how hard he is willing to work to improve the marriage.
 
J

jessypooh24

Guest
#6
#6
I pray that the Lord God will lead you and that His Holy Spirit will guide you to the decision yo u need to make. God bless you.
 
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paul1149

Guest
#7
#7
I pray for peace for you in this very hurtful situation. I think you should seek and receive the Lord's comfort, and make it Job One to abide in His love and acceptance. It is in Him that we derive our worth, not from others. From that place of peace you'll be able to make good choices.

In another thread nearby I cited the example of Joseph, and it seems to fit here as well. Joseph did not attempt to reconcile immediately. Instead, he drew out his brothers in order to prove their hearts. When he finally saw that they had changed, that they weren't envious toward Benjamin as they had been toward him, it was time for meaningful reconciliation.

So take your time and seek the Lord's wisdom on this. Your husband also might need the time to come to grips with what he truly values in life and what changes he needs to make to affirm it. Do everything prayerfully, and perhaps at the right time meaningful reconciliation will come to you as well. A good book on this is Dobson's Love Must be Tough.

I pray you receive the comfort and wisdom that will see you to victory.
 
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