A child out of adultery need advice and prayer

[Kw]

I've made a post on this subject before but let me fill you in on my story
When my husband and i first got married everything was great and we were even trying to start a family ; my husband wanted a little girl so bad! . I remember I would pray to God and seriously say " I will never lose faith in you, Lord you know when the time is right for me to have a child and I leave it in your hands". After awhile things got bad with my marriage. My husband and I was at a lose in our marriage and were in the middle of a divorce. I did the one thing I swore not to do and commited adultery . Though we weren't together we were still married. And the worst part is , is that I found out a month later I was pregnant. I thought of abortion but ruled that out and I was suicidal even because my guilt killed me because I didn't know if the father was my husband or the other mans. I told my husband everything and I repented to God like I never have before ! I felt so stupid that I lost faith in the Lord , the one who was always there for me. I prayed and prayed and cried myself to sleep so much I would get sick. My husband came to me and told me that he loves me and he wants to stay with me no matter who the father is. He said he'll be the father. Today I am 20 weeks pregnant (5months) and since my husband and I talked about it we are so happy and we havent even fought not once . I even found out yesterday that we are having a little girl . I thank God for giving me a man that loves me so much. But it still crosses my mind why I happened to get pregnant while I cheated not while I was with my husband. I feel like God did this to fix my marriage that this was his plan ( not the adultery part ) I know what I did was wrong and I'll never do it again. I tell my husband that she has his nose or chin but deep down inside I'm wondering if it's the other mans and I'm scared so scared I don't want to lose my husband again I just ask for your prayers and advice . I wonder what Gods plan is/ was for me . Thank you

 

[dmdave17]

Dear Kw,

Based on what you have described, my advice would be to stay out of the way and let God finish His plan. He seems to be doing a pretty good job so far. Remember, Christ warned us not to worry. “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life,...Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?...Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." (Matthew 6:25-34) Trust in God. He will do what is best for you and your family. (Romans 8:28, "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him,...)

 

[rainacorn]

Accept His forgiveness.

Love your husband and the child God has blessed you with.

If you simply can't drop it and want to potentially sabotage yourself, go get a paternity test.

 

[lightbliss]

Since you husband is already open to being around regardless of the biological father, I don't think you should worry much. As rainacorn mentioned, you can take a paternity test.

If he finds out he's not the father, that might be a ping in his heart but after overcoming adultery, everything else pales in comparison. Or, from a different perspective, it could make things worse (but I think this depends on your relationship now).

Here's the thing: Adultery hits really hard. In my opinion, if your husband were to leave you, he'd be gone by now. You may think of the outcome of your situation as the end-all but maybe it's not. If someone is hurting, I don't think they'd stick around for more potential pain but your husband is still with you which means he is willing to work things out with you.

God Bless and I'll keep you in prayer.

 

[zeroturbulence]

The women here are probably going to want to tear me apart with their fingernails after I say this, but I think you should find out who the real father is when you feel you are ready, not just for your own knowledge but because your daughter is going to want to know who her real father is too.

 

[Jullianna]

I'm so very glad to read that you and your husband are together and are willing to raise this child together no matter what. Takes quite a man to do something like that. You are blessed.

It may be obvious in some way when the child is born who the father is or is not. If not, there may come a time when it is very important. You or your child may need to know for medical reasons. Also, relatives have big mouths sometimes and you would not want your child to learn about this from someone other than you or your husband. I can't imagine the effect this could have on her.

Zero, I will not be scratching your eyes out. My biological father divorced my mom and disappeared when I was two and I was never permitted to talk about him as a child. I didn't even know what he looked like until I came across a photo at my maternal grandmother's house when I was in jr high school. MY son looks exactly like him. He passed away before I could find him as an adult, but I did get to meet his family and learn about him. It was very important to me even though my amazing stepfather adopted me at 6 and raised me as his own. There was still a pretty big hole... It's not something I like to talk about, but I thought it was important to mention here from a child's point of view.

When you and your husband are ready to deal with that, you will know. There's no rush. For now it's enough for the two of you to ENJOY the new life that's coming to the two of you and bond as a family since he is willing to do that no matter what.

May God richly bless your family.

 

[NMsmile]

I am praying for you. I would really encourage you to try and address the under the surface issues when God brings you to that place. God is good and he wants good things for you and your family. Take care!

 

[pickles]

Trust in Jesus and the loving witness of His forgivness in your husband.
This is a gift in Jesus, give thanks and praise.
I will keep your family in my prayers in Jesus Christ is Lord.

God bless.
pickles