B
Help! The other day my huband and I got into a huge argument. He was at work and I told him I was going to lunch w/ a friend. He sd he would be home at 1130. 1130 came and went. So I got worried. I called his coworker looking for him (he doesn't have a cell) and she told me he went to lunch w/ some coworkers, but she would have him call me. He never called and didn't come home till 1:30. While waiting, I became increasingly upset at his total disregard for my lunch appt. (Fyi...we have 18 month old twins and a 9 year old dtr. We never go out b/c we don't have a sitter. Both work f/t. I travel for work a lot.)So, when he arrived home, the first thing he sd to me was, "Oh, so now you're mad?" It made me even more upset that this is the 1st thing he sd. He didn't think to explain, apologize, nothing! So, we began to argue and I just blew up. Out of nowhere, I felt like every negative feeling I,ve ever fealt during our marriage filled me at this very moment. I demanded he give me the keys so I could leave and I sd I was taking my eldest dtr to lunch w/ me. He would not give me the car keys b/c he didn't want me to take me dtr. He sd he couldn't watch the twins alone! I proceeded to try and get the keys ferom him multiple times. He kept pushing my arm away. Finally, all those feelings made their way out and I began to dig my nails into him while reaching for the keys. We did this for a while. Finally, he stood up and had this crazed look in his eyes and sd enough of this s***, grabbed my arms as hard as he could and threw me to the floor. I got scared b/c this wasn't the first time he'd done this while upset. So, I called the police to help mediate or diffuse the situation. They arrived and embarrasingly enough, I knew the responding officers. We went over what happened. I told them I was scared. But, I didn't want to press charges. They explained to me that their protocol would be to take us both into custody and the kids would go w/ social svcs. But b/c they knew me, they asked what I wanted to do. They ended up leaving and just giving me their direct cell #s. I left for the entire day w/ my dtr and stayed at a friend's house. My husband and I haven't spoken in 3 days. We alternate sleeping on the couch. We just avoid each other completely. He is a fairly new christian. I've been praying about this. But, I just can't seem to get over the extremely hurtful things he said to me. I want this to work. But, I don't think he does. He sd he was fine with a divorce during the argument and called me a tramp b****. I tell myself to initiate some conversation b/c I lknow this silence is deadly. But, I can only feel the pain and see the bruises on my arms. Is this all my fault?