FORGIVE!!

If someone as done wrong to you, FORGIVE THEM!!!

There is no possible way that you can go to the Lord for grace if you hold unforgiveness in your heart. If you forgive the person, who can retain your peace.

If we do not attach ourselves to temporary things, we should be able to easily forgive. I know it is hard sometimes, but unforgivensss can grow worse and worse, and become a terrible cancer. Unforgiveness eats away at our souls till we die in it, and we will end up in hell if we don't.

Jesus forgives EVERY single one of our evil deeds, and this is because he is merciful. If we do not forgive like he did us, then we will not be forgiven. Don't let bitterness grow in your heart. Release it and forgive, then the Lord will hear your prayers.

Release anyone of what they owe you. TODAY!! If anyone owes you something, release them of the obligation. You will deliver them from bondage, and then you can even glorify Jesus when they say, ''Why did you forgive me?''

Even if they have no right to be forgiven, do it anyhow. And DO NOT BRING IT BACK UP!! Once it is gone it is gone, it is wiped away. New slate. Forget it!! Don't make try to make them feel guilty or obligated to repay because of mercy. If they see the mercy, they will be thankful. Seek for the glory of Jesus, not for self-righteousness.

Don't try to make yourself seem holy because you have done it, and they owe you nothing, as you have forgiven them. Perhaps they will understand and show the same mercy to others that owe them. Then perhaps these souls will see the truth of Jesus Christ in you. Hopefully they will not see a false pretense of forgiveness, on the basis of debt.

May Jesus bless you.

[kayem77]

Amen!
God bless you.

[Wonderland]

I've been working with a young woman who has been traumatized by a man. On top of her constant fear reactions of which she has no control (hypervigilance, intrusive thoughts, avoidance, etc.), she feels incredible guilt because the christians in her life continuously tell her that she needs to forgive him. This fear and guilt is causing extreme frustration and is manifesting in anger. Sure, forgiveness is the ultimate goal, but she needs to be safe first, she needs to find peace second, and when that long, difficult process is done, then she can forgive. But everyone telling her to forgive forgive forgive is not helping--it is only making things worse.

Just another perspective for your black and white world.

Be blessed.

[Joshua175]

"There is no possible way that you can go to the Lord for grace if you hold unforgiveness in your heart" Please be careful, we do hold sin in our bodies because our bodies are not yet redeemed, only our spirit has been redeemed. It is not man that justifies but God, who is perfect. It is not us that save but Christ Jesus who died on the cross and shed his perfect blood so that we could be forgiven for our Sin which is, All sin, not just some and it's not on a basis of anything but Faith because if it were from works then it would not be Grace. So then, it is a free gift to Any and All who believe.

John 3:16 "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life."

Ephesians 2:8-9 "For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God:
Not of works, lest any man should boast."

1 John 1:8-10 "If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we say that we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us."

Please don't tell believers that they will go to hell if they do not forgive but rather say that God will fulfill forgiveness in their heart according to his renewing of your spirit, soul and mind which is by the Grace and love of our Lord Jesus Christ.

Romans 8:1-4 "There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit. For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus hath made me free from the law of sin and death. For what the law could not do, in that it was weak through the flesh, God sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh, and for sin, condemned sin in the flesh: That the righteousness of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit."

Romans 13:20-21 "Now the God of peace, that brought again from the dead our Lord Jesus, that great shepherd of the sheep, through the blood of the everlasting covenant, Make you perfect in every good work to do his will, working in you that which is wellpleasing in his sight, through Jesus Christ; to whom be glory for ever and ever. Amen."

Originally Posted by Wonderland

I've been working with a young woman who has been traumatized by a man. On top of her constant fear reactions of which she has no control (hypervigilance, intrusive thoughts, avoidance, etc.), she feels incredible guilt because the christians in her life continuously tell her that she needs to forgive him. This fear and guilt is causing extreme frustration and is manifesting in anger. Sure, forgiveness is the ultimate goal, but she needs to be safe first, she needs to find peace second, and when that long, difficult process is done, then she can forgive. But everyone telling her to forgive forgive forgive is not helping--it is only making things worse.

Just another perspective for your black and white world.

Be blessed.

I agree with what you say. Thank you for your comment.

You are right!!! She needs to be safe first, and then she needs peace second!! Amen!!

I could not know forgiveness if I had not been forgiven. My forgiveness cost God his Son's life!!! You are right my friend, she needs salvation FIRST. Then she needs PEACE, and both of these come from Jesus Christ. And after that, fear and guilt are done away with. And in the place of anger the Lord puts love. And the result of THIS love leads to forgiveness.

I understand what you mean. Anyhow. May Jesus bless you.

p.s. Have you tried to share the gospel of Jesus with her? I am sure that the Lord can use you to minster to her!!

[Wonderland]

We have talked about faith--mostly her beliefs. I spend most of my time with her listening--that's what she needs right now. When the time is right I trust God will give me words. Pray for her and her family if you remember. God knows her name. And thank you for your concern.

Originally Posted by Wonderland

We have talked about faith--mostly her beliefs. I spend most of my time with her listening--that's what she needs right now. When the time is right I trust God will give me words. Pray for her and her family if you remember. God knows her name. And thank you for your concern.

AMEN! That is the faith my friend, ''I trust God will give me the words.'' Indeed he will!! May Jesus bless you.

[shekaniah]

When God forgives he forgets, when we forgive....we should let it go, but that does not always mean you can trust the person again.
If they are not walking in Christ, they do not have His spirit to convict them. If they are walking in Christ, trust has to be earned back.
Either way actions speak louder than words, I would have to see a change in behavior....before I would trust again.

Originally Posted by shekaniah

When God forgives he forgets, when we forgive....we should let it go, but that does not always mean you can trust the person again.
If they are not walking in Christ, they do not have His spirit to convict them. If they are walking in Christ, trust has to be earned back.
Either way actions speak louder than words, I would have to see a change in behavior....before I would trust again.

You know, I don't know if I could ever earn Jesus' trust. I mean, I trust him, because I know he knows all the things that are good. but even I DON'T TRUST MYSELF!!!

NO!!! I look around and I say, ''Lord I can only trust you, because you are good!!!''

If Jesus said to me, ''you have to earn my trust,'' I could never earn it, ya know?

As far as people are concerned, I would say we are altogether untrustworthy. Yet, by the grace of God, he has entrusted us with something so precious as the gospel of Jesus. It is like a precious jewel. And if we don't look after it, it might be stolen. AMEN! It reminds me of some scriptures:

Matt 13:45 ¶Again, the kingdom of heaven is like unto a merchant man, seeking goodly pearls:
Matt 13:46 Who, when he had found one pearl of great price, went and sold all that he had, and bought it.

I look to see the burdens of people eased. I don't want to make someone earn my trust. I want them to see the love of God which trusts me with something great, even though I am weak.

Some people may not believe unless they SEE the kingdom of heaven. And for many reason, people who should see the kingdom cannot.

It is written that the world cannot see it, as it does not come with observation. But Jesus came preaching this kingdom, and he certainly did back it with power. And many souls were saved.

May Jesus bless you.

[shekaniah]

I'm not referring to Jesus, I'm referring to trusting the unsaved? Or the back sliders. If someone absused my child, I know I would have to forgive them. But trust them with my child again? You can't trust a confused or unstable person. My faith is in God, Not man. I will pray about this, and ask God for His wisdom. ( Good forum)

[juliet84]

Originally Posted by Ramon

If someone as done wrong to you, FORGIVE THEM!!!

There is no possible way that you can go to the Lord for grace if you hold unforgiveness in your heart. If you forgive the person, who can retain your peace.

If we do not attach ourselves to temporary things, we should be able to easily forgive. I know it is hard sometimes, but unforgivensss can grow worse and worse, and become a terrible cancer. Unforgiveness eats away at our souls till we die in it, and we will end up in hell if we don't.

Jesus forgives EVERY single one of our evil deeds, and this is because he is merciful. If we do not forgive like he did us, then we will not be forgiven. Don't let bitterness grow in your heart. Release it and forgive, then the Lord will hear your prayers.

Release anyone of what they owe you. TODAY!! If anyone owes you something, release them of the obligation. You will deliver them from bondage, and then you can even glorify Jesus when they say, ''Why did you forgive me?''

Even if they have no right to be forgiven, do it anyhow. And DO NOT BRING IT BACK UP!! Once it is gone it is gone, it is wiped away. New slate. Forget it!! Don't make try to make them feel guilty or obligated to repay because of mercy. If they see the mercy, they will be thankful. Seek for the glory of Jesus, not for self-righteousness.

Don't try to make yourself seem holy because you have done it, and they owe you nothing, as you have forgiven them. Perhaps they will understand and show the same mercy to others that owe them. Then perhaps these souls will see the truth of Jesus Christ in you. Hopefully they will not see a false pretense of forgiveness, on the basis of debt.

May Jesus bless you.

Awesome post!!! My favourite topic of all,...Forgiveness

[dmdave17]

Originally Posted by Wonderland

We have talked about faith--mostly her beliefs. I spend most of my time with her listening--that's what she needs right now. When the time is right I trust God will give me words. Pray for her and her family if you remember. God knows her name. And thank you for your concern.

It has taken me many years to realize that forgiveness is not for the benefit of the "forgivee"; that is God's job to forgive. Forgiveness is for the benefit of the "forgiver". God knows that we can never truly achieve peace until we have forgiven those who have hurt us. As long as we harbor bitterness in our hearts, we cannot come into a right relationship with Him. He urges us to forgive for our own benefit.

God bless you and your friend.

[signum123]

i have a freind who keeps letting me down when we arrange to go out which means i end up letting other people down how do i forgive him with the happening time and time again ?

[dmdave17]

Originally Posted by signum123

i have a freind who keeps letting me down when we arrange to go out which means i end up letting other people down how do i forgive him with the happening time and time again ?

I don't know how else to put this. You should always try to forgive him but maybe you need to reassess whether or not you really want his friendship. And, forgiveness doesn't preclude us from pointing out a person's flaws to them; especially if they are hurtful. The Apostle, Paul, instructed us to, "Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit,...".

It sounds to me as if your friend could do with a little admonishing.

Originally Posted by signum123

i have a freind who keeps letting me down when we arrange to go out which means i end up letting other people down how do i forgive him with the happening time and time again ?

I have let Jesus down time and time and time... again. Yet, he has forgiven me, time and time and time... and time... again.

There was one who asked Jesus, if his neighbor were to trespass against him 7 times in a day, should he forgive him till 7 times, but Jesus says, ''not until 7 times, but 7 * 70 times. And I will say also, not until 7 * 70 times only, but to 7 * 70 * 700 times also.

May Jesus bless you.

[jamie26301]

This is a wonderful thread, and the opening post ministered to me. I am struggling with unforgiveness against a woman. I struggle with forgiving her for not forgiving me! Haha. But I know that I must lay the offense aside. Forgivness is not a popular Christian topic, because Christians like to think they have a right of hold on to hurts if the person doesn't repent. But we forgive weather they repent or not. We forgive for ourselves, so that God will continue to forgive us. I heard Joyce Meyer say that unforgivness is like drinking poisen and hoping the offender will die from it.

Kudos!

[manda]

I understand the whole forgiveness thing and pknow that it is for me and not the other parties but it is easier said than done. My husband of going on19 years had an affair with his brother's wife for several years and only stopped because he got caught. At the time (3 years ago) I made the decision to try to save our marriage because of our kids ages 8 and 11. I now find myself almost hating my husband and am seriously considering divorce. I am so conflicted and am even having trouble going to church. My children are being affected because other parents are not allowing their children in our home. I think the only way i will ever forgive him is to be away from him. There is never a day that I don't think of and compare myself to the other woman who was a good friend. I am at such a loss and so confused. Please keep me and my children in your prayers.

Originally Posted by manda

I understand the whole forgiveness thing and pknow that it is for me and not the other parties but it is easier said than done. My husband of going on19 years had an affair with his brother's wife for several years and only stopped because he got caught. At the time (3 years ago) I made the decision to try to save our marriage because of our kids ages 8 and 11. I now find myself almost hating my husband and am seriously considering divorce. I am so conflicted and am even having trouble going to church. My children are being affected because other parents are not allowing their children in our home. I think the only way i will ever forgive him is to be away from him. There is never a day that I don't think of and compare myself to the other woman who was a good friend. I am at such a loss and so confused. Please keep me and my children in your prayers.

I heard a testimony.

A woman was a good Christian woman. She went to church all the time and her husband did not go to church, and wasn't a christian. One day the woman found out that her husband cheated on her, and she grew bitter against him. The Lord tried to bring her back to him, but since her heart was hard with bitterness and unforgiveness she hardened her heart against her husband, and thus, against the Lord.

One day, her anger consumed her so much that she killed her husband and the woman on which he cheated with her, and then she turned and killed herself. This lady will never see heaven. She is lost forever in hell. If only...

I need help myself my friend. I NEED HELP!!! We will pray TOGETHER!!! So that our own hangups do not condmen us!!! LORD HELP US TO FORGIVE! HELP US TO BE OBEDIENT!!

At times like this it is good to go off or away to pray, and spend time with Jesus. Times like this I could not stay in a house or something, I just had to go off away from distractions and pray, and cry and moan and lament. Fervent prayer!!

My friend, sometimes, because of even our own unforgiveness, people are offended into hell. I will explain:

A person owes someone something, but cannot pay it, because thy have had a bunch of unfortunate events.

Well, they go to the person, and the person hardens their hearts and does not forgive them. Now the person is put back in chains of debt, whereas they could have peace if they were forgiven the debt. And now it is even hard for them to go to Jesus, because they read about ''pay your debts if you owe them.''

It is terrible!! I have been through it!! I owed a person something, but I could not keep it. And then they kept asking me and asking me, and I had to make lies. I lied and lied, and it put me further in condemnation to hell. Why couldn't they just see and understand that I am really sorry and forgive me, and give me peace and rest??

Please, release the debt and your debt will be released. I love you. May Jesus bless you.

[juliet84]

Originally Posted by manda

I understand the whole forgiveness thing and pknow that it is for me and not the other parties but it is easier said than done. My husband of going on19 years had an affair with his brother's wife for several years and only stopped because he got caught. At the time (3 years ago) I made the decision to try to save our marriage because of our kids ages 8 and 11. I now find myself almost hating my husband and am seriously considering divorce. I am so conflicted and am even having trouble going to church. My children are being affected because other parents are not allowing their children in our home. I think the only way i will ever forgive him is to be away from him. There is never a day that I don't think of and compare myself to the other woman who was a good friend. I am at such a loss and so confused. Please keep me and my children in your prayers.

Watch this. Hope it helps. CLick this>>>Getting Past Your Past - LifeChurch.tv

[Wonderland]

Wow Manda... You may be right, that you need to be away from him to be able to forgive him. It is hard to imagine that you would be able to ever trust him again. Not saying that's impossible--nothing is impossible with God, but wow... that indiscretion was not just a one-time-deal, was it?

Marital unfaithfulness is grounds for divorce. You have the spiritual right to walk, and I don't think many people would blame you (of course there will always be some, but this is between you, your husband and God, isn't it?). I believe in God's miracles, and if you do too, He can restore this marriage.

I love the story of Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, the faithful Jews who refused to worship the golden statue. King Nebedchednezzer was about to throw them into the furnace to die, and do you know what they said? They said, "Our God CAN save us. He WILL save us, but even if he does not, we will still not bow down to false idols."

Your God CAN save your marriage, he WILL save your marriage, but even if he does not, please focus on doing the "right" thing in God's eyes. I'm sorry I can't tell you what that is for your situation, but God will help you to know if you seek him first.

Be blessed dear one. And please don't give up hope.