Bitterness in the family: How it has affected you?

[Stanelake]

Hi all. I just wanted some friends to share with. People that have first hand experience on having bitterness, or their spouses holding something against them. How did you overcome or how are you dealing with it-as in my case? Jas 3:14 But if ye have bitter envying and strife in your hearts, glory not, and lie not against the truth. Jas 3:15 This wisdom descendeth not from above, but is earthly, sensual, devilish. Jas 3:16 For where envying and strife is, there is confusion and every evil work.

[Sarah88]

If you're the one feeling bitter because someone hurt you, the best thing to do is to forgive that person even though you don't feel like it. Hanging on to bitterness will only cause you to hurt yourself more and it will erect a wall between you and your loved ones. God has called us to have peace with everyone. If someone hurts you, go to that person and tell him/her how you are feeling and, no matter the reaction, choose to forgive.

Benjamin Franklin said:

"We stand at the crossroads, each minute, each hour, each day, making choices. We choose the thoughts we allow ourselves to think, the passions we allow ourselves to feel, and the actions we allow ourselves to perform. Each choice is made in the context of whatever value system we’ve selected to govern our lives. In selecting that value system, we are, in a very real way, making the most important choice we will ever make".

So, even though you don't feel like forgiving (as we all do), pray about it and decide it in your heart.

On the other hand, if someone is bitter or is holding something against you, talk to that person and ask for their forgiveness. Then, try extra hard to serve them and love them.

I hope this helped

[shekaniah]

Pray ask God to show you what you need to do. If you want to change the way someone is treating you....it starts with you.
Change your behavior, to change theirs. Start praying, ask God for widsom....be kind and gentle, its hard to be rude to someone who is
open, kind and honest.

AHHHHH!!!!!!!! OH YES!! I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT!!!

I used to just walk away from it!!! But it came after me!!!

It makes me think about the trial of Jesus. He was mostly silent, even though he could have said many things about those who falsely accused him.

AHHHH!! I dislike bitterness much. I don't like it when I am provoked. It is like I am choking on discord(hope you got that).

I would rather cry. Just sit there and just cry than let my heart get bitter. Just let me cry and plead with the Lord to deliver me!!!

May Jesus bless you.

[Wonderland]

You've probably heard of the fruit of the spirit. Most of them are lovely: love, joy, peace, kindness, goodness, and gentleness.
Two of them are not so wonderful: long-suffering and self control. There's your answer.

In my marriage I have learned a very hard lesson: Will I do what's right, or will I do what's easy? Usually what's right requires virtues of long-suffering and self control, especially when my spouse is not so committed to the "high road."

But in the end I feel I've won. Long-suffering and self control certainly build strength, and God has used that strength to influence my husband to be the man God wants him to be (well... he's closer anyway--it's still a journey.)

Be blessed.

[Stanelake]

@Sarah88.
Well said beautiful quote. Its the choice inside to forgive even if the other party chooses to be aloof. i didnt do that at first because i expected a lot.
@Shekaniah.
I like the phrase "its hard to be rude to someone who is open, kind and honest. "
It realy comes after me everytime i choose to ignore it. some times i think its God's way of dealing with a certain characteristic in me; pride, temper, maybe
thanks guys yo contributions are good and helpful