secretly hurt because I am a virgin and my bofriend is not

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Sarahabc

Guest
#1
#1
My boyfriend and I are both saved. I was saved years longer before him. On our first date, he confessed how sexually active he was before he knew the Lord. I accepted all confessions he made, knowing that Jesus washed his sins away. In my quiet moments I think about the confessions he made and would feel hurt about it all over again (wishing they were never true and he was a virgin like me). In this apect, there is sort of an imbalance because he experience a greater piece of the world than I did. However, what we share in common is that we both love the Lord and are seeking to do His will. Need some encouragement here.
 
A

ANewCreature

Guest
#2
#2
Wow ur still a virgin and your 24 years old i whish i was still one before i got married so i could of gaven my husband that most wonderful gift.What you have Sara is a treasure big up to u on keeping ur self for so long i really admiare that of you espsicly in the days of time that we are living in my dear were sex is just been put out there in the open. What a gift u have oh so so so spceail. But remmeber what he did he did it when he was not save and all of us made one or two mistake while we were in the world but thank God for his salvation .But this is my advice to you just remember who ur living for dont worry about the world and what the world is doin or has dun cause ur a new creature ur thinking should be diffenert and not focus on what the world is puting out. Keep ur eyes on Jesus and he will dircet your path. Romans 12 and 2 "And be not conformed to this world but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind that ye may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God". God Love u. Be Bless my sister
 
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Brian64

Guest
#3
#3
What matters is not where your boyfriend comes from, what his past life was and what sins he had committed; but what he has become now from his past experiences and most importantly, where he is going to. Do you want to go with him?
 
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sweet_eyes

Guest
#4
#4
I am a virgin at 23 but not everyone waits likes brian said it isn''t about where your guy came from but where he is now.
 
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Brian64

Guest
#5
#5
Sweet_eyes, it is a real inspiration to know that you are a virgin at 23.You are the evidence that our world is not forsaken by God. Keep your purity intact till your wedding night. God bless you.
 
andrew87

andrew87

Banned
#6
Jul 8, 2009
11
0
0
#6
I think it is great that you have remained pure. I always thought purity is one of the best and most attractive features a woman can have. I think it says a lot about a person's character if they remain a virgin until marriage.
 
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imoss

Banned
#7
Feb 27, 2007
3,179
19
0
#7
bless your heart & what a wonderful beautiful daughter of Christ you are precious in his sight. Your boyfriend is also precious in his sight... he is washed white as snow by the blood of the Lamb. I urge you to wipe from your mind any thought of his past and the people therein for it is counterproductive to your relationship and will cause tension. Ask the Lord for assistance in this that you may be able to view him the way God does. Bless your relationsip. Marcia.
 
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buckeyegirl700

Guest
#8
#8
I think it is wonderful that you are a virgin. If you truly love your boyfriend and feel that God has put him in your life to love and build a life with then try to focus on your future and not his past.
 
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broken

Guest
#9
#9
Make sure you two communicate this hurt before you get serious in your relationship, that is consider marriage or what have you. If its a real issue for you perhaps he isn't the right guy. Something to pray about.
 
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ChristopherMichael

Guest
#10
#10
Sarahabc said:
In my quiet moments I think about the confessions he made and would feel hurt about it all over again (wishing they were never true and he was a virgin like me). In this apect, there is sort of an imbalance because he experience a greater piece of the world than I did.
Click to expand...
You say this like you're kind of jealous of what he got to experience. Having sex before marriage damages you emotionally, and (I believe) spiritually. I see the joy a lot of my friends have after they both wait and then then get married. I wish I had waited. So yeah, don't be envious.

Yours in Christ,
- Topher
 
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Dread_Zeppelin

Guest
#11
#11
As someone who lost their virginity before marriage I'd be devistated if my boyfriend was hurt by my past mistake. You need to forgive him. Virginity is a gift you can't give back-so dont judge others who cant no matter how bad they want to.
 
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Leilaii425

Guest
#12
#12
Theres always something about a person we dont like. maybe he doesnt like your hair. or the way you walk, i dunno, but do him a favor. Dont hold this against him. Its really really really hard to tell someone especially someone you like, that your not a virgin you have been sexually active before you were married. I wouldnt have been able to do what he did just be up front about it. That took alot of nerve on his part. I can understand since your a virgin how this might bother you..... or wait no i dont understand cause i cant remember when i was a virgin, im in this guys defense, dont break up with him over it. He probably beats himself up enough about it without having someone else doin the same thing
 
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ilavjesus

Guest
#13
#13
i think its not important what was his past all about...You should see him as what he is now and not always remember his past...
i remmeber my x boyfriend said....PAST IS PAST.....PRAY that God will help you in this problemmm ...have faith...
 
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JLBSTORM

Guest
#14
#14
Dont feel hurt, everyone here is right, it is who you and he are now. You have something special.... I didnt wait and gave myself to a man who turned out to be a complete lie and betrayal, now I have a feeling left of dirtyness and sadness. I am going thru these emotions now but know GOD forgives us and me. He heals all mistakes...
 
M

Matthew

Guest
#15
#15
I can understand your feeling a little, one time I almost got close to someone I was a virgin and she had been with several other people, she wasn't a christian at the time and I was and although I liked her a lot it made me feel very uncomfortable.

It is easy to say past is past and you should just accept it but that is difficult, like has been said your boyfriend showed a lot of courage to be honest with you and open up about his past and it's no surprise it bothers you, I think in return you need to be equally as honest with him about how you feel now, if you move forward it's not good to leave this unresolved, if you tell him how you feel you can both talk about it openly and that migh make it easier for you to feel better about it, he ought to know if there is something that important on your mind so he can help you deal with it.
 
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imoss

Banned
#16
Feb 27, 2007
3,179
19
0
#16
my dear sarah, 3 months time has past. How are things going? Have you reconcilled your forgiveness with the Lords forgiveness of your boyfriend?
 
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greatkraw

Guest
#17
#17
If any man be in Christ he is a NEW creature. (it was someone else that had that experience)

you have your own faults, we all do

The enemy would like to sabotage your relationship
 
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Girl_22

Guest
#18
#18
I'm 25 years old and I'm still a virgin and I plan on waiting until I get married!!
 
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tryingtofindhim

Guest
#19
#19
Sarahabc said:
My boyfriend and I are both saved. I was saved years longer before him. On our first date, he confessed how sexually active he was before he knew the Lord. I accepted all confessions he made, knowing that Jesus washed his sins away. In my quiet moments I think about the confessions he made and would feel hurt about it all over again (wishing they were never true and he was a virgin like me). In this apect, there is sort of an imbalance because he experience a greater piece of the world than I did. However, what we share in common is that we both love the Lord and are seeking to do His will. Need some encouragement here.
Click to expand...
Leave the past in the past. Don't get your feelings hurt about it; you were privileged to be a Christian longer than him. Him not being a virgin, yet a Christian, could help someone else.
 
A

Acce

Guest
#20
#20
OK, I haven't read anything anyone else has said, sorry, but Sarah, I am 24 years old and a virgin also, and I remember being devestated when I found out my ex was not a virgin - it is admittedly hard to deal with - but they are born again with the Lord, and washed clean of our sins. So you must realise that he is forgiven from God - so you must do the same.

I honestly get it. Embrace the fact your a virgin, like I do. Its more sad he doesn't have that same privilege you know.


Much Love,

Acce
 
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