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My wife is angry with me since she found that I looked up a coworker/boss/friend of hers on facebook. I admitted that I looked up her since my wife showed me her pictures of this friend in swimsuits. I didn't mean to make it personal but I was trying to keep a promise of not going to other websites...my history is that I have been married to my wife for 17yrs. Im 39 now. We met as teenagers. In the first year of marriage my wife had an affair with a coworker of ours. But she denied and lied about it for 10 yrs. She then within two weeks started to complain that I wasn't telling her things like I guess words of affirmation...then said she didn't know how long she could except it. All I said at the time was she needed to do whatever she thought to help me get through the hurt and pain. through the years I have not felt loved by her...she always seemed to put things above me. We have never had a real good sexual relationship. She hardly ever initiated any intimacy giving all sorts of excuses. She even struck me once when I attempted to initiate with some persistency...not with force.... not like that. I have talked to her about not feeling loved. I told her she needs to initiate to help to help me fight the temptation of fulfilling that need with self gratification...really I hated it cuz I knew I was sinning and was violating my body. throughout the years she would see the history on computer and get mad. I would try to talk to her that it wasn't that I wanted anybody else I felt unloved...lonely. so like I said I tried to keep my promise and looked at the Facebook pics instead...which I realize was wrong but I thought it wasn't as bad. she has been "angry" at me and been really distant and to make matters worse is that she has developed some unacceptable relationship with a cousin of hers. She just met him and his family at his dads funeral last august. I have been doing everything I can to make me a better husband and trying to be patient. she has stayed over the weekends at his family's house several times. I have never met him I didn't go to funeral...he's my father in laws brothers son.(cousin). The reason I type this is because I just recently seen the call history from her cell. Since late august /early September she has texted and talked all day long with him to the average of approx. 2-3 hrs. talking throughout each day and up to 30-40 texts every day. per billing cycle. I told her that's not normal and asked if its physical at all. She denies it...saying "Its my cousin." like I said though they just met last summer. I told her that was excessive and abnormal. and it hut because she's been vindictive and mean for 4 months now. I texted him to back off in as nice a way I knew how. stated I don't think his wife would appreciate it if she knew how much they talked. he hasn't backed off should I talk to his wife to see what she thinks...he texted back in what I took like a matter of fact way she knew they talked.... but I don't think to what extent. Its all day morning to night. Its really bothering me how much she talking to him. should I ask his wife if she knows and if she's ok? so maybe if she does and is ok then I don't have to be suspicious. There's more to it but I'm disturbed and am not thinking this out all together but somewhat fragmented.
