What IS a "bad boy"?
- Thread starter Grace-Like-Rain
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I believe a "bad boy" cheats on you with other women, is verbally or physically abusive, disrespectful of you and your social circle, hates your family, has anger issues, is selfish and does not believe in God. Same goes for the "bad girl" I guess.
I am stubborn, argumentative and brutally honest to the point of being insensitive. Does that make me a "bad girl"? Maybe only on my worst days! Most of the time I try to play nice.
I am stubborn, argumentative and brutally honest to the point of being insensitive. Does that make me a "bad girl"? Maybe only on my worst days! Most of the time I try to play nice.
I don't know that this is part of "game playing" so much as someone thinking they can handle the truth when perhaps they struggle more with it than they would have expected.
But it all depends on what "truth" you speak of. The truth that a dress looks terrible on them, or the truth that their husband is seeing another woman, or the truth that they are actually quite wrong in the argument you are having?
My husband kept his affair from me for 6 months, and when I did find out, I couldn't believe he'd lied about it for so long. When questioned, he said "Why do you want to know these things that will only hurt you?". He actually felt justified in lying to me so that I wouldn't be hurt. This is what I'm thinking of when I quoted CS Lewis about finding only despair when you seek only comfort. I'd rather seek TRUTH, take that bitter pill, and go on with life. Am I strong enough to handle it? Well, I'm still standing, praise the Lord.
If you mean more frivolous things like how her hair looks or what you are REALLY thinking when you shut your mouth tight during an argument... every woman handles those things differently. My comment referred more to "big" lies that really matter.
For example: In my post that you quoted about bad boys never telling the truth, I was thinking of my ex I'm afraid, who found it easier to lie and pretend everything was great, than deal with issues that could have been easily corrected had they been brought out in the open.
But it all depends on what "truth" you speak of. The truth that a dress looks terrible on them, or the truth that their husband is seeing another woman, or the truth that they are actually quite wrong in the argument you are having?
My husband kept his affair from me for 6 months, and when I did find out, I couldn't believe he'd lied about it for so long. When questioned, he said "Why do you want to know these things that will only hurt you?". He actually felt justified in lying to me so that I wouldn't be hurt. This is what I'm thinking of when I quoted CS Lewis about finding only despair when you seek only comfort. I'd rather seek TRUTH, take that bitter pill, and go on with life. Am I strong enough to handle it? Well, I'm still standing, praise the Lord.
If you mean more frivolous things like how her hair looks or what you are REALLY thinking when you shut your mouth tight during an argument... every woman handles those things differently. My comment referred more to "big" lies that really matter.
For example: In my post that you quoted about bad boys never telling the truth, I was thinking of my ex I'm afraid, who found it easier to lie and pretend everything was great, than deal with issues that could have been easily corrected had they been brought out in the open.
I don't know that this is part of "game playing" so much as someone thinking they can handle the truth when perhaps they struggle more with it than they would have expected.
But it all depends on what "truth" you speak of. The truth that a dress looks terrible on them, or the truth that their husband is seeing another woman, or the truth that they are actually quite wrong in the argument you are having?
My husband kept his affair from me for 6 months, and when I did find out, I couldn't believe he'd lied about it for so long. When questioned, he said "Why do you want to know these things that will only hurt you?". He actually felt justified in lying to me so that I wouldn't be hurt. This is what I'm thinking of when I quoted CS Lewis about finding only despair when you seek only comfort. I'd rather seek TRUTH, take that bitter pill, and go on with life. Am I strong enough to handle it? Well, I'm still standing, praise the Lord.
If you mean more frivolous things like how her hair looks or what you are REALLY thinking when you shut your mouth tight during an argument... every woman handles those things differently. My comment referred more to "big" lies that really matter.
For example: In my post that you quoted about bad boys never telling the truth, I was thinking of my ex I'm afraid, who found it easier to lie and pretend everything was great, than deal with issues that could have been easily corrected had they been brought out in the open.
But it all depends on what "truth" you speak of. The truth that a dress looks terrible on them, or the truth that their husband is seeing another woman, or the truth that they are actually quite wrong in the argument you are having?
My husband kept his affair from me for 6 months, and when I did find out, I couldn't believe he'd lied about it for so long. When questioned, he said "Why do you want to know these things that will only hurt you?". He actually felt justified in lying to me so that I wouldn't be hurt. This is what I'm thinking of when I quoted CS Lewis about finding only despair when you seek only comfort. I'd rather seek TRUTH, take that bitter pill, and go on with life. Am I strong enough to handle it? Well, I'm still standing, praise the Lord.
If you mean more frivolous things like how her hair looks or what you are REALLY thinking when you shut your mouth tight during an argument... every woman handles those things differently. My comment referred more to "big" lies that really matter.
For example: In my post that you quoted about bad boys never telling the truth, I was thinking of my ex I'm afraid, who found it easier to lie and pretend everything was great, than deal with issues that could have been easily corrected had they been brought out in the open.
I think it's really sad to pretend it was for your good, I am sorry these things happened to you and your girls. I am however Joyful to see what God has done in your life through these things - it is a blessing
There are two versions of a "BAD BOY".
1) The kind who drives a Harley, wears leather jackets & boots and has a bunch of tatts on his arms. Dating a man of this kind is completely an individual preference. As long as he is in Christ, he is free to retain his identity.
2) This is the "player". The one who is "here today, gone tomorrow". He loves the chase but not the kill. They not only womanise, but they take pride in it. Some of them even keep scores! Date him at your own peril.
Similarly, there are two versions of a "BAD GIRL".
1) The girl who is positively independent, outgoing and career-focussed. She speaks out her mind but also knows how to respectfully disagree. She can be submissive in some matters, and authoritative otherwise. She can be a leader and a follower. She can play the part of a loving wife at home and a high-performing employee at work. As long as she has her identity in Christ, she can be the way she is. Personally, I like this kind of a "BAD GIRL".
2) This kind loves to use her body for getting the men's attention. (I am not talking of physical beauty here.) It is preferable to avoid her.
I understand that it is not easy for someone who is attracted to the second type of men/women. Some love to "tame" the untamed and keep them as a prized trophy. It is a risk that they are taking and they alone are responsible for the consequences of their choices.
1) The kind who drives a Harley, wears leather jackets & boots and has a bunch of tatts on his arms. Dating a man of this kind is completely an individual preference. As long as he is in Christ, he is free to retain his identity.
2) This is the "player". The one who is "here today, gone tomorrow". He loves the chase but not the kill. They not only womanise, but they take pride in it. Some of them even keep scores! Date him at your own peril.
Similarly, there are two versions of a "BAD GIRL".
1) The girl who is positively independent, outgoing and career-focussed. She speaks out her mind but also knows how to respectfully disagree. She can be submissive in some matters, and authoritative otherwise. She can be a leader and a follower. She can play the part of a loving wife at home and a high-performing employee at work. As long as she has her identity in Christ, she can be the way she is. Personally, I like this kind of a "BAD GIRL".
2) This kind loves to use her body for getting the men's attention. (I am not talking of physical beauty here.) It is preferable to avoid her.
I understand that it is not easy for someone who is attracted to the second type of men/women. Some love to "tame" the untamed and keep them as a prized trophy. It is a risk that they are taking and they alone are responsible for the consequences of their choices.
