I.H.B.S. (I Hate Being Single)
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Get a cat......you will always be greeted at the door and someone to talk to that doesn't talk back....being alone and being lonely are two different things......I have lived in a crowded house and still feltlonely....preparing yourself for what God has planned for you is time better spent.....and so much to dothat you won't even know what loneliness is...get involved with charity orgs. In your area....be a big brother....this not only prepares you for fatherhood .....you will also be helping Gods children who have been given a difficult life to begin....stay busy.....your time will come....and when God does reveal your partner to you...you will have so much more to offer.....find peace young brother.....Gods time tells all.......peace...jo
J
At least you wouldn't have to get annoyed for when you share stuff with someone else. Unless, of course, you have a cat that thinks that you have to share your cup of water with them... And give room for them when going to sleep... And expecting a breakfast AND dinner made for them everyday. This times four for me.
Almost like having a spouse but it's cuter and fluffier.
*Funny how we talked about cats at the same time! ^
Almost like having a spouse but it's cuter and fluffier.
*Funny how we talked about cats at the same time! ^
At least you wouldn't have to get annoyed for when you share stuff with someone else. Unless, of course, you have a cat that thinks that you have to share your cup of water with them... And give room for them when going to sleep... And expecting a breakfast AND dinner made for them everyday. This times four for me.
Almost like having a spouse but it's cuter and fluffier.
*Funny how we talked about cats at the same time! ^
Almost like having a spouse but it's cuter and fluffier.
*Funny how we talked about cats at the same time! ^
Z
I was actually going to say something similar. We're faced with situations we hate constantly because that's how we learn and grow.
I also saw someone else mention the difference between being alone and feeling lonely, I think they brought up a valid point. There is very little in life that's more heartbreaking than feeling alone while with someone. Being married does not take away those feelings. You first need to change your mindset and choose to not feel that way. If you feel lonely now, how much more lonely will you feel when you're married and have to give up your own life for your family knowing you very well may get very little in return?
I also saw someone else mention the difference between being alone and feeling lonely, I think they brought up a valid point. There is very little in life that's more heartbreaking than feeling alone while with someone. Being married does not take away those feelings. You first need to change your mindset and choose to not feel that way. If you feel lonely now, how much more lonely will you feel when you're married and have to give up your own life for your family knowing you very well may get very little in return?
J
One is not necessarily better than the other, but the grass usually looks better on the other side of the fence.
Raising a family is amazingly time consuming and difficult. Seriously, just watch this video and start doing the work of the Lord:
Merchandising Souls - YouTube
I have hardly left my house in 2 years, since my youngest daughter was born. Literally, I do nothing but spend time with my children. I will be working again soon (working to provide for a family is not any more "freeing") and I cherished all the time I was able to spend with them, but if you think it is going to be "better", I think you are getting carried away with your imagination.
Raising a family is amazingly time consuming and difficult. Seriously, just watch this video and start doing the work of the Lord:
Merchandising Souls - YouTube
I have hardly left my house in 2 years, since my youngest daughter was born. Literally, I do nothing but spend time with my children. I will be working again soon (working to provide for a family is not any more "freeing") and I cherished all the time I was able to spend with them, but if you think it is going to be "better", I think you are getting carried away with your imagination.
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J
1 Corinthians 7:1-9
Now concerning the matters about which you wrote: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.” 2 But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband. 3 The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband. 4 For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. 5 Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.
6 Now as a concession, not a command, I say this.[a] 7 I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another.
8 To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single as I am. 9 But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion.
1 Corinthians 7:25-35
Now concerning[g] the betrothed,[h] I have no command from the Lord, but I give my judgment as one who by the Lord's mercy is trustworthy. 26 I think that in view of the present distress it is good for a person to remain as he is. 27 Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be free. Are you free from a wife? Do not seek a wife. 28 But if you do marry, you have not sinned, and if a betrothed woman[j] marries, she has not sinned. Yet those who marry will have worldly troubles, and I would spare you that. 29 This is what I mean, brothers: the appointed time has grown very short. From now on, let those who have wives live as though they had none, 30 and those who mourn as though they were not mourning, and those who rejoice as though they were not rejoicing, and those who buy as though they had no goods, 31 and those who deal with the world as though they had no dealings with it. For the present form of this world is passing away.
32 I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. 33 But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, 34 and his interests are divided. And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband. 35 I say this for your own benefit, not to lay any restraint upon you, but to promote good order and to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord.
Now concerning the matters about which you wrote: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.” 2 But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband. 3 The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband. 4 For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. 5 Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.
6 Now as a concession, not a command, I say this.[a] 7 I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another.
8 To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single as I am. 9 But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion.
1 Corinthians 7:25-35
Now concerning[g] the betrothed,[h] I have no command from the Lord, but I give my judgment as one who by the Lord's mercy is trustworthy. 26 I think that in view of the present distress it is good for a person to remain as he is. 27 Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be free. Are you free from a wife? Do not seek a wife. 28 But if you do marry, you have not sinned, and if a betrothed woman[j] marries, she has not sinned. Yet those who marry will have worldly troubles, and I would spare you that. 29 This is what I mean, brothers: the appointed time has grown very short. From now on, let those who have wives live as though they had none, 30 and those who mourn as though they were not mourning, and those who rejoice as though they were not rejoicing, and those who buy as though they had no goods, 31 and those who deal with the world as though they had no dealings with it. For the present form of this world is passing away.
32 I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. 33 But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, 34 and his interests are divided. And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband. 35 I say this for your own benefit, not to lay any restraint upon you, but to promote good order and to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord.
S
I'm 44 and LOVE being single..no one to answer to..nobody hogging the bedcovers..no toilet seat being left up..lol..
Being single is not for everyone. Heck, I sometimes wonder if the people that claim being content with it are actually screaming on the inside at times. Loneliness is a difficult thing to cope with. Hang in there; that's about all the advice I can offer at the present moment. Something may happen sooner than you'd imagine it to.
It's much lonelier to be in a marriage with someone who is incompatible. Trust me on this. Take your time. Enjoy life. Pursue hobbies and interests. Take salsa dance lessons. Volunteer somewhere. Take a cooking class. Cultivate friendships with those you do these things with. Fellowship with other believers. Get a pet. Focus on God. And live your life.
I have been married and single in between marriages for 35 years and I can tell you there are advantages and disadvantages to both situations. Yes, during the first marriage I still felt lonely as it has been mentioned and it was the pits to have a partner who didn't care about your emotional well being. Granted we are responsible for how we chose to feel, but I could be in a crowded room and still feel lonely.
While single I did enjoy freedom of making my own choices and doing whatever I wanted whenever I wanted and I had resigned myself that I would probably die alone and actually wondered how long I would decompose before someone found me....sick I know....but as you get older these thoughts creep in.... Actually my daughter usually stopped by on Sundays and we would spend mother daughter time so wouldn't have been more than a week.... I digress....anyway...
I learned to be o.k. with single life and accepted it for what it was which was really peaceful and too quiet at times and yes, I did have a cat along the way....but mine did talk back....in meows.
Married life is nice to share your life with someone but it is not all roses either as there are times when both parties don't want exactly the same thing....and then you work it out. First marriage was a disaster as we just got married way too young and grew up and grew apart we both tried to change each other into what the other thought was the perfect spouse... 35 years later the second marriage we are much older and know what we wanted in a spouse and the expectations although high are realistic. We both know we are flawed people but we have accepted each other for who we are and it is very refreshing.
Praying that you will find your lady love and remember to always pray and ask God for His guidance and direction for this all important step in your life and at 30 there is still a lot of life to live....I'm 60 and thankful for every day I am given and I know tourist feels the same. God bless you in your search.
While single I did enjoy freedom of making my own choices and doing whatever I wanted whenever I wanted and I had resigned myself that I would probably die alone and actually wondered how long I would decompose before someone found me....sick I know....but as you get older these thoughts creep in.... Actually my daughter usually stopped by on Sundays and we would spend mother daughter time so wouldn't have been more than a week.... I digress....anyway...
I learned to be o.k. with single life and accepted it for what it was which was really peaceful and too quiet at times and yes, I did have a cat along the way....but mine did talk back....in meows.
Married life is nice to share your life with someone but it is not all roses either as there are times when both parties don't want exactly the same thing....and then you work it out. First marriage was a disaster as we just got married way too young and grew up and grew apart we both tried to change each other into what the other thought was the perfect spouse... 35 years later the second marriage we are much older and know what we wanted in a spouse and the expectations although high are realistic. We both know we are flawed people but we have accepted each other for who we are and it is very refreshing.
Praying that you will find your lady love and remember to always pray and ask God for His guidance and direction for this all important step in your life and at 30 there is still a lot of life to live....I'm 60 and thankful for every day I am given and I know tourist feels the same. God bless you in your search.
I used to feel this way too, but I've come to realize that this ideal of being happily in a relationship is more a myth than a fact. Being in a relationship brings along its own set of problems and to put it simply... you can either be single and lonely or be in a relationship and be frustrated and bitter. Of course not all relationships are that way, but from what I have seen, it seems like most of them are. Just look at the divorce rate..
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I have a few suggestions for you! I have also felt lonely at times in my life, despite having met Jesus at a young age. Here are a few tips:
Try to encourage others. The persecuted church and those hurting on this site would be a great place to start. Ask Jesus to give you more to do for Him. Not only does it take your mind off of what you don't have, it also makes you a better future husband and you'll be doing what God has asked us to do.
Thank Jesus that you're single at this point in your life and ask Him to help you serve Him while this is your lot. Yes, even though you don't like it. He said to give thanks in all things. You can be thankful while disliking a situation, believe me.
Share the Gospel with someone. Better yet, many people. I bet you've seen a person on another site or even here who, if you ask Him to, God will put on your mind and show you what to say to them, even if it's a short "Jesus loves you".
Try to remember that you are loved intensely (to the point of the Son of God giving Himself for your salvation!) no matter what, and your relationship with Jesus is the one that matters the most by far, and the only one that can bring true contentment. Hope this helps.
Try to encourage others. The persecuted church and those hurting on this site would be a great place to start. Ask Jesus to give you more to do for Him. Not only does it take your mind off of what you don't have, it also makes you a better future husband and you'll be doing what God has asked us to do.
Thank Jesus that you're single at this point in your life and ask Him to help you serve Him while this is your lot. Yes, even though you don't like it. He said to give thanks in all things. You can be thankful while disliking a situation, believe me
.Share the Gospel with someone. Better yet, many people. I bet you've seen a person on another site or even here who, if you ask Him to, God will put on your mind and show you what to say to them, even if it's a short "Jesus loves you".
Try to remember that you are loved intensely (to the point of the Son of God giving Himself for your salvation!) no matter what, and your relationship with Jesus is the one that matters the most by far, and the only one that can bring true contentment. Hope this helps
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You're 30 and starting to worry you will never find a wife? I'm 36 and being single is GREAT! My money is... MY money! My time is... MY time! If I want to let the dishes pile up it shall be done. If I think they've piled up long enough and it's time to wash them, it shall be done.
If I want to BLAST SOME MODERN CHRISTIAN THROUGH THE HOUSE ON MY LARGEST SPEAKERS... it shall be done! With earplugs.
If I want to BLAST SOME MODERN CHRISTIAN THROUGH THE HOUSE ON MY LARGEST SPEAKERS... it shall be done!
With earplugs.
You're 30 and starting to worry you will never find a wife? I'm 36 and being single is GREAT! My money is... MY money! My time is... MY time! If I want to let the dishes pile up it shall be done. If I think they've piled up long enough and it's time to wash them, it shall be done.
If I want to BLAST SOME MODERN CHRISTIAN THROUGH THE HOUSE ON MY LARGEST SPEAKERS... it shall be done! With earplugs.
If I want to BLAST SOME MODERN CHRISTIAN THROUGH THE HOUSE ON MY LARGEST SPEAKERS... it shall be done!
With earplugs.
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