Draw near to God

[sienna1388]

Hi everyone,

I'm new to this site and not sure where to post this, but the singles section seemed right.

Despite having the Holy Spirit practically yell at me not to do it, I started dating a separated man a year ago. He'd moved out of the house and had been separated 6 months. For the last 6 months we'd removed all physical affection. It ended a month ago and I'm heartbroken. And I can't even really pray about it because it's wrong for me to still want him.

Before this I was a full on, in love with God, Christian. But I was lonely. And Satan saw an in and used it. So for those of you who are feeling lonely, please be careful. I don't want any of you to go through this. When you date someone who is available you can at least ask for God's blessing on it. In this situation, I never could. And I was so clueless as to how the devil would get to me.

So if you're lonely, stay in the Word, floodyour spirit with hopeful sermons online, and pray Jesus blood all over you. And wait, yes really wait, on God. If I'd done that, I wouldn't be so devastated tonight.

 

[Olerica]

I will respond to your heart ache with understanding. It stinks so much when we know we're not doing as we should, but do it anyway... and then we realize how much our way really does damage us.

Sienna, cry out to God. He forgives us our unwise choices, and he loves us enough to want relationship with us... our call to submit to God isn't a one time deal, its a daily process. God wants to come near to you, Sweetheart. You are important to him and he wants your contrite heart, your submission, you to take time with him and seek healing.

Our God works ALL things together for HIS glory, and this experience will be something he can use as you draw you closer and closer to to him. God bless you. :hug:

(and you are right, when we aren't focused on God and submitting to his will, we do get ourselves in a whole host of troubles.)

 

[skylove7]

Lovely post Olerica! Very heartfelt. God bless you! Sienna...welcome to CC! You will find many caring people here! I will pray for you! Hold on in Gods light....and Gods will!

 

[sienna1388]

Thank you for your Christ like comfort - I'm very grateful. I know God will be glorified in this, and I hope I can help at least one person not rebel the way I did.

 

[cinder]

And I can't even really pray about it because it's wrong for me to still want him.

Don't let the devil keep you trapped with this lie. You can pray about anything, you just want to make sure that your requests are Godly. So no, you can't ask God to bring you two back together (assuming he's still technically married to someone else at least), but you can certainly ask God to help you deal with your heartbreak in a Godly way, to help you move on from this relationship that you now realize you were unwise to ever get into. You can repent for not listening, which I'm sure you've done. You can ask God for new friends to help alleviate the loneliness that made you vulnerable to temptation in the first place.

And sometimes prayer is just that metaphorical curling up in God's lap and crying on his shoulder; that's okay too. But remember, God already knows what's going on inside you; it's not like you're going to shock or surprise him with anything you have to tell him about this situation.

 

[egeiro]

Some of my most raw moments with God happened where I was crumpled on my bedroom floor, tear stricken and a complete mess, where I simply cried out, "Help me" or "I'm sorry". They were simple words, but I was in a complete state of heart ache, disappointment, hopelessness and/or conviction. I had just done something I knew I shouldn't have done, and I couldn't bare how much it was hurting His heart. Some times it would take me days or weeks before I would come before the Lord because I was so ashamed or didn't feel worthy to be before Him.

But the very place we need to be during those times is close to Him, with rent hearts and a desperate groan for Him to touch those places that are hurting. It's okay to get messy before God, He's not afraid of our mess.

He wants to wrap you in His presence right now, Sienna, how he longs for His beloved daughter to call His name so He can come charging like a mighty Champion, ready to fill all the aching places and to write His blood over the past. His mercy and loving-kindness endures forever for a reason, He knew we will fall short at times. But it's not about magnifying our mistakes, but looking at the magnitude and inconceivable wealth of His goodness and love. His mercy is new everyday for us.

When I have been in those places, where I have remorse over not listening to the voice over the Holy Spirit, I always thought, "Oh no, I'm going to have to start at square one again and He's going to take it all away because I couldn't look after the little He has given me." But that has never happened. He gently restores me to the place He has called me to be and we more on from there, together.

Let the Comforter comfort you, let the washing of His blood cover you, and let His hand take yours, so you can start this dance called life all over again, with the tune of a beloved Bridegroom, pouring adoration over His bride.

 

[sienna1388]

Egeiro, thank you for those beautiful words. I'm so grateful for the compassion showed to me here. I'll pay it forward.