Why do we cringe when we hear the words ....

[violakat]

So since there seems to be a lot of discussion about traditional women, traditional men, etc. I wanted to put my two cents in, but in a completely different way.

Men hear women claim they are independent women and for some reason, from what I've seen, many cringe. Why, what do they think of when they hear that term? And what do women mean by being independent?

Women have a tendency to cringe when they hear the words "Women are to submit to their husbands?" Why, what do they think it means when a man says it? What do they think it means? And what do men really mean when they say submissive, as in, how do women show they are submissive?


And then, I bringing up the much hated terms Feminist, Feminism, FemiNazi, Male chauvinist pig. (Yes I just went there.) What do you think when you hear these terms?

And go.

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When I use the word Independent Woman, I use it as a woman who knows how to take care of herself and is not afraid to if life requires her too. Yet at the same time, she will also be willing to let her husband be the leader of her home. (Seoul would be a good example here.)

When I hear men use the words wives are to be submissive, quite often, it seems a lot of them mean that the woman will have no say whatsoever. And yet, to me, that term means the woman allows the man to have the final say, as he, in God's eyes, will bear the majority of responsibility in what happens to his family. It does not mean she does not have any say, it just means gives him the final decision.

To me, a feminist is one who strives to protect the rights that God gave to women. A feminazi, (Madeline O'Hare) however, takes it too far, in that they try to obtain rights that God did not give them, and quite often tries to suppress men because they are female chauvinist.

A male chauvinist. () is a man who tries to suppress women for what ever reason. Often, it's because they believe they are superior to women and therefore should have the man given right to say what a woman can or cannot do. (Fortunately, I don't see many men on CC that are like this. Actually, I don't really recall any on here that are like this, although I suppose they could be here.)

A traditional marriage, to me, is one where the wife stays home and takes care of the home, while the husband works. She may bring in additional income, but the husband is the main bread winner.

A modern day marriage is one where the husband and wife both work outside the home and equally share in the household chores and maintenance. Either may be the main bread winner, or contribute equally.

For me, personally, I don't have a problem with either types of marriages, just as long as the couple still follow the Biblical roles that God has set apart for each gender.

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So give me your two cents.

 

[Oncefallen]

or if you prefer modern currency

 

[Liamson]

Traditionally, when we think of why words are not just their definitions in a Vacuum, we consider their loaded meanings. And when we use the word Tradition-al, its practically a beast of burden.

So when an active outgoing guy like me hears tradition, I think of hardcore breadwinning, raising a bazillion kids, and working so much that I only see my family at night and on the weekends.


But, I'm too old for all that, so traditional would mean me working all the time, and her cleaning the house and watching netflix on the couch. She might have a garden, or friends who are in the same predicament.





Whatever the CARROT is for tradition marriage, it isn't for me.

 

[violakat]

This is way toooo funny.

 

[PoetMary]

Although lots of people have an idealized view of "Little House on the Prarie" days, Laura Ingalls Wilder was a pretty modern little missy from a pretty progressive family.

Her Pa moved the family around quite a bit because he had "itchy feet" until Ma put her foot down and insisted that the live in one place so the girls could be properly educated. Ma worked both inside and outside of the home at various times.

Although the prevailing view of Native Americans was pretty negative (and Ma espoused this view), Pa had respect for them and encouraged Laura to view them compassionately.

The entire family saved and sacrificed to send Mary to a school for the blind so that she could receive a higher education. They understood that her possibilities might be limited and Ma especially wanted her to travel a little and experience life.

Although Laura was amply trained in all the "womanly arts" (sewing, cooking, gardening, keeping house, etc.), she would often work outdoors with her Pa because she was "as strong as a French horse," and he needed the help of another person (the family had no sons). During the "Long Winter" she and Pa did most of the work creating straw bundles to burn after the family ran out of coal.

Pa enjoyed many of the machines the Progressive Era brought to them. And enthusiastically participated in new technologies. He even bought his wife the newest sewing machine to make her work within the home easier.

Both parents encouraged the girls' to be achievers in a variety of venues.

Laura cut her hair into "bangs" because it was a popular style, even though Pa teased her about having a "lunatic fringe."

Laura worked outside the home in various jobs. Most famously, she began to teach at age 15. Eventually, after her marriage to Almanzo, she would work as a newswriter.

She liked fast and slightly wild horses and would help Almanzo break in horses, even if it meant being a bit risky. Also, Almanzo trusted her to drive these horses on various occasions.

She flat out told Almanzo to his face that she was only accepting his sleigh rides as a means of getting home and not because she was interested in him. As they continued to see each other, when Almanzo got fresh by putting his arm on the back of the buggy seat, Laura would shake her lap blanket to startle the horses so he'd have to get both hands back on the reins. Later, when he asked her what would make her accept a proposal, she saucily answered, "It would depend on the ring." And after they were engaged she allowed him to kiss her.

When she and Almanzo decided to quickly marry, she went against her mother's advice and wore her black dress to marry in because it was her newest dress.

So you see, those Ingalls were not nearly as traditional as people might imagine.

 

[Lynx]

Yup. Someday when we're all long gone someone will look back at good ole traditional death metal. And they will either complain about the old fogeys at their church who still sing that traditional, boring stuff or they will claim it is the only truly anointed christian music, far better than the grysgh music kids listen to these days and call christian.

Yes I made up grysgh because I can't see into the future and tell what their modern music will be. But you get the idea. "Traditional" is extremely relative and time-dependent.

 

[INTJer]

I think I am kind of conservative but I cringe when some preachers go on and on about how men have all of the authotitay and women are to submit, submit, submit! To me that is as bad as extreme feminists who talk about how oppressive and evil all men are.

It is funny how some guys will zero in on Ephesians 5:22. It is like that is the central verse in that chapter. Nay, perhaps it is the central verse in the entire Bible! But if you read verses 21 through 33, you will find some rather severe demands being made on the husband. That might or might not be acknowledged in passsing but for a lot of churches that claim to be "Biblical," most of chapter 5 can be glossed over but the words "wives - submit" must be focused on with laser-like intensity, as bright as 1,000 suns.