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Being a "Christian single" doesn't have to be a test, but rather part of the journey
When I was 18, I was swept off my feet (literally at times) by the man I thought God had put in my life to marry. He was a pastor, a few years older, and very quickly his dreams became mine. We were "engaged" and had a wedding date set, no ring, but lots of promises. When people would ask who I was, his response was always "This is my future wife."
Then he cheated on me. For three months. And broke up with me, 250 miles away, via text. I was crushed. How could I have been so wrong? How could I have mistaken all those signs?
The next few years were a struggle for me. Being a "Christian" I thought my calling was to find a Godly man, raise a big family, and raise a Godly family with the man God had chosen. This led to a lot of "missionary dating" and a lot of mistakes. Some dark times followed, I got involved with some people that were very wrong for me, and definitely NOT what God had planned for me.
In 2012, I fully submitted myself to God. I've definitely still made lots of mistakes, but I remember the day so clearly when I realized I had been wrong for a long time and up until then, had not really been a Christian.
Over the next three years, I developed life-long relationships, let God prune my life where He needed to, and was able for the first time to ACTUALLY hear His voice, and see clearly what He wanted for me.
At 18, I "knew" that by 26 I would have already celebrated my five-year anniversary, have two kids, and be well into planting a church with the man I was dating.
At 26, I still struggle with "He has to be out there somewhere" and the ever ringing voice of "I haven't found him because I'm not good enough." But at 26, I'm also so content to just be me, and allow God to work on me. I'm thankful, so incredibly thankful, that I didn't get married at 18. My 20s have been hard, challenging, sometimes impossible. But what changed was that at 23, I was able to find God, find true friends, and develop a life that I'm able to say is God-driven. Christ is enough for me, and if he does will for me to find a husband, then it will happen.
My advice to anyone who is struggling with not being in a relationship yet, regardless of how old or young, is please...please let God work in you during these times. Take out your Bible, learn some verses. Let the spirit lead you.
One of my dreams as a child, was to move to Seattle. If I had gotten married at any point in my life, I wouldn't be sitting in my living room in Seattle, learning a new city and learning how to overcome. God let that dream come through. Is my husband in this city somewhere? I have no idea. But I do know that God has gotten me this far, and that He (and only He) knows the bigger picture for me.
Let God work. He truly does know best.
When I was 18, I was swept off my feet (literally at times) by the man I thought God had put in my life to marry. He was a pastor, a few years older, and very quickly his dreams became mine. We were "engaged" and had a wedding date set, no ring, but lots of promises. When people would ask who I was, his response was always "This is my future wife."
Then he cheated on me. For three months. And broke up with me, 250 miles away, via text. I was crushed. How could I have been so wrong? How could I have mistaken all those signs?
The next few years were a struggle for me. Being a "Christian" I thought my calling was to find a Godly man, raise a big family, and raise a Godly family with the man God had chosen. This led to a lot of "missionary dating" and a lot of mistakes. Some dark times followed, I got involved with some people that were very wrong for me, and definitely NOT what God had planned for me.
In 2012, I fully submitted myself to God. I've definitely still made lots of mistakes, but I remember the day so clearly when I realized I had been wrong for a long time and up until then, had not really been a Christian.
Over the next three years, I developed life-long relationships, let God prune my life where He needed to, and was able for the first time to ACTUALLY hear His voice, and see clearly what He wanted for me.
At 18, I "knew" that by 26 I would have already celebrated my five-year anniversary, have two kids, and be well into planting a church with the man I was dating.
At 26, I still struggle with "He has to be out there somewhere" and the ever ringing voice of "I haven't found him because I'm not good enough." But at 26, I'm also so content to just be me, and allow God to work on me. I'm thankful, so incredibly thankful, that I didn't get married at 18. My 20s have been hard, challenging, sometimes impossible. But what changed was that at 23, I was able to find God, find true friends, and develop a life that I'm able to say is God-driven. Christ is enough for me, and if he does will for me to find a husband, then it will happen.
My advice to anyone who is struggling with not being in a relationship yet, regardless of how old or young, is please...please let God work in you during these times. Take out your Bible, learn some verses. Let the spirit lead you.
One of my dreams as a child, was to move to Seattle. If I had gotten married at any point in my life, I wouldn't be sitting in my living room in Seattle, learning a new city and learning how to overcome. God let that dream come through. Is my husband in this city somewhere? I have no idea. But I do know that God has gotten me this far, and that He (and only He) knows the bigger picture for me.
Let God work. He truly does know best.
