Youve wanted it here it is: the guy friends and female friends thread non dating

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
Lynx

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
#21
Aug 13, 2014
24,896
8,156
113
#21
cinder said:
I think you should probably take their texts as in they are either lonely and wanting someone to talk to or they are trying to include you in their lives (be glad they aren't texting you about the hot date they have later that night or had last night). If it bothers you yes you need to discuss it or ask them to stop, but if they're trying to include you in their lives then they are likely to take you asking them to stop as a personal rejection.

Also keep in mind that some guys find it difficult almost to the point of impossible to talk about emotions and other personal touchy feel stuff, so if you want to discuss this with them try to stick to actions and more concrete aspects. It might also be a good idea to state your case and then give them a few days to come up with a response rather than expecting them to talk about it the minute you ask; they haven't been thinking about it nearly as long as you have.

Ok awesome CC menfolk, did I get that about right?
Click to expand...
Yup, pretty much spot-on. At least from what I know it's accurate.
 
M

missy2014

Guest
#22
#22
Ugly said:
Well, if it's not s spouse or serious boyfriend then it isn't 'needed' that badly to talk. What you actually mean is that you want to talk about it and not have to wait.
But some people (and not just guys) have their limits. I know, for me, if I'm pushed to a limit I need to get away. I need to go think, cool down, so that I don't say anything out of anger. If I'm pushed to talk at this point I will snap and get rude.
When I've had time to cool down and think I'll come back and talk.
If someone needs space, give them space. Your pushing someone to talk will only make things worse, not better. There's nothing so important that you can't give someone time to calm down. Their need to go cool off is of greater importance than your wanting to talk it out immediately.
Click to expand...
I think too this probably to do with my family upbringing even with my Dad if there was a problem or if he had a problem with me we were expected to respond verbally all I know is one of my guy friends said to me "its like you want me to respond all the time". For example if my Dad and I (im using as an example because this has to do with the guy friends) knew their was a problem and i kept quiet or didnt say much about it hed get really annoyed . Also my Christian parents and family have a high level of respect so yes I know what you mean about when my mum didnt give him time to cool down and think things over but i also know he including my mum and my brothers when theres a problem it more or less you need to be really verbally responsive and deal with it .
 
M

missy2014

Guest
#23
#23
And im not saying thats the only approach to deal with situations and problems but im recognising know part of it is me being shaped by my family upbringing
 
You must log in or register to reply here.