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S
Wow, sorry to hear that but the good news is that you are 27 and not 67. You may have wasted 7 years but you didn't waste 50. I guess my point is that a desire for children should have been one of the first topics once your relationship moved into courtship.
7 years is what I meant when I said not to get too serious until you get to really know someone. I think it's very possible that you settled for less than you really wanted. You may have been looking at your girlfriend through rose colored glasses all along, seeing what you wanted to see and denying anything you didn't want to see.
If that was the case, it is born usually from low self esteem. Most of the time lack of esteem emanates from not having a strong male role model in your early development. I suffered from low self esteem in my early adult years and spent a lot of time trying to find myself.
Without going into a thesis here I can only tell you that your identity is in Christ. You are one with him. It is Christ inside you that empowers you and validates your existence. You can find strong identity in Christ that also will allow you to express everything that makes you unique and valuable as an individual. Basically, as you become more aware of God's love for you as an individual you will see what worth he placed on you and find confidence in yourself as valuable, both to yourself and a potential mate.
7 years is what I meant when I said not to get too serious until you get to really know someone. I think it's very possible that you settled for less than you really wanted. You may have been looking at your girlfriend through rose colored glasses all along, seeing what you wanted to see and denying anything you didn't want to see.
If that was the case, it is born usually from low self esteem. Most of the time lack of esteem emanates from not having a strong male role model in your early development. I suffered from low self esteem in my early adult years and spent a lot of time trying to find myself.
Without going into a thesis here I can only tell you that your identity is in Christ. You are one with him. It is Christ inside you that empowers you and validates your existence. You can find strong identity in Christ that also will allow you to express everything that makes you unique and valuable as an individual. Basically, as you become more aware of God's love for you as an individual you will see what worth he placed on you and find confidence in yourself as valuable, both to yourself and a potential mate.
J
I have no problem with a guy who is shy. It tends to be the shyness of getting close to new people. If once I get to know them they still are shy or should I say withdrawn, then I will have to stay my distance. I do not find shy being weak, more cautious. And once you know them they open up like a flower to the morning sun. It's understandable, especially since considering your dating past! Just be you and you will shine!
If there is one thing I've learned about women, it is that they are drawn to confidence.
Introverted men generally have more difficulty in expressing confidence. Especially those who act more shy. My advice to an inherently quiet man is to convert that shyness to a sort of silent, mysterious strength.
Introverted men generally have more difficulty in expressing confidence. Especially those who act more shy. My advice to an inherently quiet man is to convert that shyness to a sort of silent, mysterious strength.
M
I've never equated shyness with weakness. A person's ability to assert themselves in social situations has nothing to do with strength of character. I feel like too much importance is placed on a man exuding confidence at all times...and that's just...I dunno, just because a guy seems confident or assertive doesn't automatically make him strong, or good.
I guess I see weak people as weak, whether they're shy and quiet or loud and in your face.
I guess I see weak people as weak, whether they're shy and quiet or loud and in your face.
I am shy, and I have noticed that every person I have gotten close to is also shy. I believe that people who tend to be more shy than not generally enjoy the company of others who are the same 
So, wait until you find a girl who shares that personality trait with you, a girl who isnt off put by a guy who doesnt have a need to talk all the time, and can handle a quiet moment together You gotta find a girl that fits you, and not try to force yourself to fit a girl you might like.
So, wait until you find a girl who shares that personality trait with you, a girl who isnt off put by a guy who doesnt have a need to talk all the time, and can handle a quiet moment together
You gotta find a girl that fits you, and not try to force yourself to fit a girl you might like.
I believe many females see shy men as weak men. It can be cute to them at first, but in the long run, shyness represents a weakness in a man's character.
As a man, ask yourself this.. would you want a:
Skinny Girl - Fat Girl.
Non-smoker - smoker.
High self-esteem - low self-esteem.
Shyness is the opposite of confidence, which most girls prefer because its a position of strength in the ying and yang of the two. Girls may flatter shy guys with words to be nice, but at the end of the day, the reality is that they go home with the confident guys, and the shy guys go home sad and lonely.
As a man, ask yourself this.. would you want a:
Skinny Girl - Fat Girl.
Non-smoker - smoker.
High self-esteem - low self-esteem.
Shyness is the opposite of confidence, which most girls prefer because its a position of strength in the ying and yang of the two. Girls may flatter shy guys with words to be nice, but at the end of the day, the reality is that they go home with the confident guys, and the shy guys go home sad and lonely.
Yea probably... i remember watching my one of my teachers fail so hard at trying to assert himself and to get enough courage to talk to the one desk lady he liked... months later she ended up marrying this other macho dude who kind of just bossed her around all the time.. later on down the road about 3 years later i saw them somewhere and they had babies in a stroller.
