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Thread: Do females find shy guys weak?

  1. #1
    antoniomitchell
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    Default Do females find shy guys weak?

    I ask because I'm extremely shy and always wondered if that was a problem in finding the one.

  2. #2
    Senior Member Ugly's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do females find shy guys weak?

    Some will say yes, others no. There is no one answer when asking genders a question like that. All people are different and see things in different ways.
    And if you're shy and some women find that weak, then that woman isn't for you. Just be you and don't worry about trying to apply blanket statements to women, because it's not possible.
    Give me a new voice
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    Senior Member Blain's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do females find shy guys weak?

    To some yes others find it adorable, some girls think a guy that cries from sad or romantic movies is a weak little cry baby while other girls just lean in closer to you because they know you have a heart
    My life's testimony seems to have helped many people so I am going to put it here http://christianchat.com/testimonies...-new-post.html

    When the hearts of God and a child of his make that special intimate connection a wondrous power is born and a flame ignites that can never be put out

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  4. #4
    antoniomitchell
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    Default Re: Do females find shy guys weak?

    Good input guys thanks.
    willfollowsGod and slave like this.

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    Default Re: Do females find shy guys weak?

    Quote Originally Posted by antoniomitchell View Post
    I ask because I'm extremely shy and always wondered if that was a problem in finding the one.
    A word of warning. Most girls know though shy people appear unable to share in groups, when you get to know them they can be very different. What you are then is what they want to know, because that is the true you.

    Shyness is not something you need to stay with. You can learn to share things you care about in a neutral way and grow in confidence and learn different techniques. If you want a partner and later children this is important skill to learn, because you may well be faced with a kid who needs help being expressive, which is hard if you have the same difficulty.

  6. #6
    MollyConnor
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    Default Re: Do females find shy guys weak?

    I like it. I think it's sweet.
    But I also don't like it if the guy makes me feel awkward. If he doesn't make me feel like he likes me back (even if he does but he's just too shy to say anything) I move on. It's happened before where I think a guy likes me at school, then I start to like him and he NEVER makes a move BUT he is telling my friends he likes me but acts like he doesn't around me. That can be annoying.

    But I don't find them weak. Now if they sweat and their glasses fog before a speech, that's a bit much...I would do that in speech class! haha It was embarrassing...

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    Senior Member jsr1221's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do females find shy guys weak?

    Quote Originally Posted by MollyConnor View Post
    I like it. I think it's sweet.
    But I also don't like it if the guy makes me feel awkward. If he doesn't make me feel like he likes me back (even if he does but he's just too shy to say anything) I move on. It's happened before where I think a guy likes me at school, then I start to like him and he NEVER makes a move BUT he is telling my friends he likes me but acts like he doesn't around me. That can be annoying.

    But I don't find them weak. Now if they sweat and their glasses fog before a speech, that's a bit much...I would do that in speech class! haha It was embarrassing...
    Maybe the guy thinks you don't like him back in return? And my glasses always fog up.. Speech, or no speech. I immediately can't see anything when walking outside. So there's that.
    willfollowsGod and torus like this.

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    Senior Member jsr1221's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do females find shy guys weak?

    Quote Originally Posted by Ugly View Post
    Just be you
    This statement, I hear people say too many times... In this case yes there's nothing wrong with being shy, as some women find it cute. But just think a minute. If someone couldn't find any friends in general, and was deemed a lone, wouldn't that person be doing something wrong to be putting off a negative vibe? I'm just saying. If we tell EVERYONE "Just be you" then that would imply people that may not have the best intentions, and ones that deceive. Sometimes, we can't "just be us". Sometimes, we do have to change something about ourselves, so we can become better.

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    Senior Member Fenner's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do females find shy guys weak?

    No, my Husband was shy, my son is shy, I was also shy. People are who they are, it doesn't mean your weak. Actually I always preferred conversations with quiet people like myself. I don't come off as shy on line but I am a little shy around new people.

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    Senior Member Shouryu's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do females find shy guys weak?

    Quote Originally Posted by Fenner View Post
    No, my Husband was shy, my son is shy, I was also shy. People are who they are, it doesn't mean your weak. Actually I always preferred conversations with quiet people like myself. I don't come off as shy on line but I am a little shy around new people.
    JENNIFER! *pouncetacklehugs* Been missing you, sister! So good to see you! I'm glad you came back. ^_^

    Hope things are improved now.

    Okay, thread derail over. Back to shy guys.
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    Senior Member A_Friend_In_Christ's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do females find shy guys weak?

    I think most females avoid shy guys like the plague. Maybe they can be a good friend but that's all. That's why most shy guys hardly ever go on dates?

    Is that what other people have found?

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    Default Re: Do females find shy guys weak?

    Quote Originally Posted by A_Friend_In_Christ View Post
    Is that what other people have found?
    Ofcourse there is shy, not pushy, and withdrawn, unable to emotionally express. The problem with being too withdrawn is the tendency to dependency, where the relationship becomes too involved.

    For some shyness can be debilitating where every expression is awkward. What I have learnt through my children is you can learn how to be more expressive and open without the emotional kickback. It comes with learning communication skills and waiting for others to respond.

    In areas of love, it is important to learn how to take the risk to share what you really feel whether people accept it or not. The more you are able to compare what you feel within with what you express outside, the more balanced you become.
    torus likes this.

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    Senior Member fourleaf's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do females find shy guys weak?

    Absolutely not. To be honest I find them interesting. Most shy guys I know are creative and intellectual. They pay much more attention and truly listen to what other people say. So I like shy guys and being shy is not a weakness for me.
    Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander ~

  14. #14
    antoniomitchell
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    Default Re: Do females find shy guys weak?

    I don't recall making people feel awkward...I just come off as shy at first. With anyone really but especially females for some reason. I guess I don't like meaningless chatter like the bible says...I'm into in depth revelations and concepts...but not so deep that I won't be a goof at times lol.

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    Default Re: Do females find shy guys weak?

    Quote Originally Posted by MollyConnor View Post
    Now if they sweat and their glasses fog before a speech, that's a bit much...I would do that in speech class! haha It was embarrassing...
    Too funny! You're the best, Molly!

  16. #16
    crosstweed
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    Default Re: Do females find shy guys weak?

    That depends on if the guy's shyness is bordering on cowardice. Hand-wringing, nervous tics, and sweating are usually somewhat unattractive to me. xD
    I tend to be middle of the road, I think. I like confidence in a guy, but not necessarily loudness or showiness.

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    Default Re: Do females find shy guys weak?

    I think women like for men to be confident, not so confident though as to be arrogant. Some of it will come with age. As I get older I am more comfortable with who I am and less concerned that everyone approves.

  18. #18
    LiJo
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    Default Re: Do females find shy guys weak?

    Quote Originally Posted by shotgunner View Post
    I think women like for men to be confident, not so confident though as to be arrogant. Some of it will come with age. As I get older I am more comfortable with who I am and less concerned that everyone approves.
    I agree with what shotgunner said.
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    Default Re: Do females find shy guys weak?

    My brother, you're just shy because you want desperately for the lady in question to like you and you're afraid she won't. I don't know that it's seen as weak but it does prevent someone from getting to know you. Just relax and be yourself. A lady will either like you or she won't. It's no big deal if she doesn't. All that means is that you haven't wasted a lot of time pretending to be someone she will like.

    Just relax, tell her about yourself but listen and encourage her to talk about herself too. Dating is all about getting to know each other. Don't move too fast, it takes a while for people to take off the mask and show who they really are. You don't want to have too much invested if the mask comes off and you find out you don't really like who you see.

    Make sure you are seeing the truth and not just what you want to see. Let her see the truth also, be truthful but not crude about it either. Even when you are married for a long time you want to act your best with your wife.

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    Senior Member chickwithsticks's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do females find shy guys weak?

    Quote Originally Posted by Shouryu View Post
    JENNIFER! *pouncetacklehugs* Been missing you, sister! So good to see you! I'm glad you came back. ^_^

    Hope things are improved now.

    Okay, thread derail over. Back to shy guys.
    *pouncetacklehugs*......now THAT is just all kinds of awesome....the word, image and feeling all in one!!

    stealing it!!

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