How Much Do You Trust Your First Impressions of People?

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blue_ladybug

Senior Member
Feb 21, 2014
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9,601
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#21
I always trust my first impression. 99.9% of the time, it's spot on. :)
 

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
Feb 21, 2014
70,869
9,601
113
#22
I always trust my first impression. 99.9% of the time, it's spot on. :)

To the person who repped me on this post, thank you. I appreciate it. :) To answer your question, my exes were all sugar, sweetness and light at first. They hid their true natures, with no hint of it upon first meeting them. Once my radar went up, out the door they went. :)
 
W

WadeWilson14

Guest
#23
Hey everyone,

Lately there has been a sea of new faces where I work, and today I was thinking about my first impressions of other people.

For myself, I've learned that my first impressions often seem to be wrong, and I really need a bit of time and history in order to form a clearer, actually useful idea of who a person is. I've gotten to a place where I'm very cautious about my first impressions.

The inspiration for this thread comes from reading a post here about someone who mentioned a few people they used to get into arguments with on CC, but over time, have become good friends.

This reminded me of someone from one of my first jobs as a teen. The first day I met her, I remember thinking, "Wow, this lady is really mean," but as I got to know her, she became one of my very favorite people to work with.

As for myself, in person, I've had some people tell me that I come across as cold when they first meet me. I can definitely see this in the workplace, as I'm usually busy trying to get something done at the same time, which gives them the impression I'm not paying attention to them. I've been working on trying to make a person's inquiry more important than finishing the task at hand.

I also have a tendency to sit back and observe people before I start communicating much, because I'm trying to learn their "style" of communication and am gauging my approach (should I use humor? Seriousness? A question? Etc.)

How good are you with first impressions?

* Does your first impression of a person usually hold over time?

* How often are your first impressions wrong? Do you often wind up liking someone you didn't like at first, or not liking someone you first liked?

* What kind of first impression do make on other people? Have you been told?

P.S. Due to the influx of new people, procedures, and protocols in my life, both in and outside of work, I've been a little frazzled. What I REALLY want to do is eat a plate of brownies (or a whole pizza... or both), but instead I'm trying to channel my energy into writing.

Thanks in advance for your thoughts! They help keep me focused on moving forward (instead of the mass consumption of fat and calories. :))
Yay for fat and calories! (I regularly eat 2 McGriddles and a hash brown for breakfast, so no judgment here).

My first impressions vary a lot based on context - how much we interacted, whether it was in a group or one-on-one, whether or not we had any chemistry, etc.
Either we have chemistry or we don't, but I'm likelier to get it wrong or withhold judgment if we only interact for a few minutes in a group setting.
I have a couple of friends who I've made over the last couple years who had great initial first impressions because we started out conversing, not just small talking. And those impressions held.
On the other hand, back at college, I accompanied Rachel, one of my close friends, to meet Lisa, a prospective new roommate.
Afterwards, I thought Lisa was stuck up because she'd ignores me when I introduced myself, and hadn't paid much attention to me. So after we left, I told Rachel that I thought Lisa was kind of a snob. And Rachel moved in with her anyway.
Over a decade later, I'm really glad I was wrong. As I got to know Lisa better, I learned that she was just very quiet and introverted; and over time she became one of my best friends.

So, I won't completely toss out my first impression of someone, but I'll see how their third, fourth and fifth impressions turn out.