Should a Traditional Man Be Expected to Provide For His Entire Household?

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Donkeyfish07

Guest
#21
We should just change the name to "Traditional Discussion Forum"...
Na, next week is missing Rip week. The week after that is cc is not a dating site week. The week after that is polls and food talk. Then we will rotate back to here again :p. Gotta keep the wheel churning
 
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Hellooo

Guest
#22
However, IMO, "traditional" isn't a particularly useful word.
I feel the same. The word traditional (or nontraditional) doesn't mean anything to me, because there just isn't a universal standard on what a 'traditional' relationship is, and as some have pointed out previously, a lot of it is culturally driven. The definition that entails a mother being a primary child caregiver seems too simplistic, when people have a variety of circumstances, with or without children involved.
For those who are just looking for a Ward and June Cleaver type situation, more power to you. It doesn't offend me, I just like to look at things realistically. For me, it seems as if we're putting God first and seeking his will, everything else kind of falls into place when it comes to your individual/family/couple dynamics.
 
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Sep 6, 2013
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#23
For me it's a lot more simple. At my age I don't see having kids, so what would the wife do all day? Watch soap operas?
There are actually more advantages to a stay-at-home wife than you might think. It's worth it for many men for their wives to not work full-time, and handle all of the home maintenance, cooking, laundry, shopping, etc. Aside from those things, most at-home women that I know are heavily involved in ministry or working part-time from home. When I was at home (I was raising kids and homeschooling, plus running a side business, so my situation was a bit different) my ex-husband really appreciated having me "available" and able to adapt to whatever schedule he was on. (Often, he worked nights or odd shifts.) When he was off I was able to spend time with him. When he had vacation days, we could travel or whatever we wanted because my schedule was so flexible. I was truly able to be his "helpmeet" because he was my first priority.

Anything that made his day easier, I could do to help out. Keeping the groceries stocked, having dinner prepared when he got home (at 3pm), bill paying, etc, as well as helping HIM start up his business (building him a website, designing business cards, doing research, etc). I don't know that any of that would have been possible had I worked full time. Anyway, a good woman wouldn't be watching soap operas all day. She'd be busy making life better for her family, even if it only includes one other person who she's married to. ;)

I am not advocating for all wives to stay home. Just defending the wife who does stay home to the agreement and benefit of both partners.
 
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Donkeyfish07

Guest
#24
There are actually more advantages to a stay-at-home wife than you might think. It's worth it for many men for their wives to not work full-time, and handle all of the home maintenance, cooking, laundry, shopping, etc. Aside from those things, most at-home women that I know are heavily involved in ministry or working part-time from home. When I was at home (I was raising kids and homeschooling, plus running a side business, so my situation was a bit different) my ex-husband really appreciated having me "available" and able to adapt to whatever schedule he was on. (Often, he worked nights or odd shifts.) When he was off I was able to spend time with him. When he had vacation days, we could travel or whatever we wanted because my schedule was so flexible. I was truly able to be his "helpmeet" because he was my first priority.

Anything that made his day easier, I could do to help out. Keeping the groceries stocked, having dinner prepared when he got home (at 3pm), bill paying, etc, as well as helping HIM start up his business (building him a website, designing business cards, doing research, etc). I don't know that any of that would have been possible had I worked full time. Anyway, a good woman wouldn't be watching soap operas all day. She'd be busy making life better for her family, even if it only includes one other person who she's married to. ;)

I am not advocating for all wives to stay home. Just defending the wife who does stay home to the agreement and benefit of both partners.
Your like .001% of the population though Grace. Unfortunately, there are not enough ladies of your caliber to go around.
 

Nautilus

Senior Member
Jun 29, 2012
6,488
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#25
There are actually more advantages to a stay-at-home wife than you might think. It's worth it for many men for their wives to not work full-time, and handle all of the home maintenance, cooking, laundry, shopping, etc. Aside from those things, most at-home women that I know are heavily involved in ministry or working part-time from home. When I was at home (I was raising kids and homeschooling, plus running a side business, so my situation was a bit different) my ex-husband really appreciated having me "available" and able to adapt to whatever schedule he was on. (Often, he worked nights or odd shifts.) When he was off I was able to spend time with him. When he had vacation days, we could travel or whatever we wanted because my schedule was so flexible. I was truly able to be his "helpmeet" because he was my first priority.

Anything that made his day easier, I could do to help out. Keeping the groceries stocked, having dinner prepared when he got home (at 3pm), bill paying, etc, as well as helping HIM start up his business (building him a website, designing business cards, doing research, etc). I don't know that any of that would have been possible had I worked full time. Anyway, a good woman wouldn't be watching soap operas all day. She'd be busy making life better for her family, even if it only includes one other person who she's married to. ;)

I am not advocating for all wives to stay home. Just defending the wife who does stay home to the agreement and benefit of both partners.
Sadly Ive been the better cook out of every girl ive ever dated, so this would not work. (bolded part only)
 
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Tintin

Guest
#26
Sadly Ive been the better cook out of every girl ive ever dated, so this would not work. (bolded part only)
Nautilus, but aren't you a chef? That said, it does seem to be a dying art that girls can cook. At least here in Australia.
 
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VioletReigns

Guest
#27
Equally yoked includes agreeing on a plan whereas both parties are pulling the load together, as opposed to one or the other carrying too much weight. Every couple is unique and should decide together what will work best for them.
 

Roh_Chris

Senior Member
Jun 15, 2014
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#28
Nautilus, but aren't you a chef? That said, it does seem to be a dying art that girls can cook. At least here in Australia.
It's the same in India. "Whoso finds a wife who can cook more than Maggi and Top Ramen, finds a good thing." :rolleyes:

Back to seoul's question -
I am a "non-traditional" guy, so I would be happy with a "non-traditional" girl. I would like both of us to be earning and for both of us to share household chores (I watch the TV and play on the PS, while she cooks and does the laundry :p j/k). However, pregnancy could change the equation. I would prefer her to be a homemaker until the kids are 8-10 years old. After that, she can pursue whatever she wants, and the equation will go back to the former state.
 
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Tintin

Guest
#29
It's the same in India. "Whoso finds a wife who can cook more than Maggi and Top Ramen, finds a good thing." :rolleyes:

Back to seoul's question -
I am a "non-traditional" guy, so I would be happy with a "non-traditional" girl. I would like both of us to be earning and for both of us to share household chores (I watch the TV and play on the PS, while she cooks and does the laundry :p j/k). However, pregnancy could change the equation. I would prefer her to be a homemaker until the kids are 8-10 years old. After that, she can pursue whatever she wants, and the equation will go back to the former state.
Haha! Brother, you're so much trouble. I love it!
 

Pipp

Majestic Llamacorn
Sep 17, 2013
5,536
2,702
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Georgia
#30
Most of my friends and families around me are one income, mom stays home and home schools the kids and dad works kind of families... including my own home. My 15 year old brother is home schooled as was I (the last few years of school) . I however do work and contribute to the household seeing as I'm 32 and still live there. I would consider us kinda old fashioned and I guess you could say traditional.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
24,908
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#31
It's the same in India. "Whoso finds a wife who can cook more than Maggi and Top Ramen, finds a good thing." :rolleyes:

Back to seoul's question -
I am a "non-traditional" guy, so I would be happy with a "non-traditional" girl. I would like both of us to be earning and for both of us to share household chores (I watch the TV and play on the PS, while she cooks and does the laundry :p j/k). However, pregnancy could change the equation. I would prefer her to be a homemaker until the kids are 8-10 years old. After that, she can pursue whatever she wants, and the equation will go back to the former state.
Wow, sounds like a winner bro!

(Let me know if you find any girl sucker enough to fall for that one... And if you do, does she have a sister?) ;)
 
Sep 6, 2013
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#32
Sadly Ive been the better cook out of every girl ive ever dated, so this would not work. (bolded part only)
Ah. I only say I was willling. Not that I was "better". If the food must be the best food, I am not in the 0.01%. :rolleyes: But if you would like something pleasant already on the table when you get home, just find a girl who is "willing".

(If you can't find pleasure in less-than-amazing food, I don't know what to tell you.)
 
Nov 25, 2014
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#34
Nautilus, but aren't you a chef? That said, it does seem to be a dying art that girls can cook. At least here in Australia.

It's a dying art for men and women. The vast majority of my students can only cook if it involves a microwave, which is a shame. To me, basic cooking is a life-skill that everyone should have. It saves money, allows people to eat healthier food, and can be used to impress the opposite sex.
 
Dec 16, 2012
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#35
Nautilus, but aren't you a chef? That said, it does seem to be a dying art that girls can cook. At least here in Australia.
That's funny because I've seen the complete opposite. I'm a vegan and any time I have a cooked meal I make it from scratch, right down to the raw, organic veggies. I know plenty of girls who love hosting and cooking for their family and friends. It might just be your circle, as my experience is different.
 
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Tintin

Guest
#36

It's a dying art for men and women. The vast majority of my students can only cook if it involves a microwave, which is a shame. To me, basic cooking is a life-skill that everyone should have. It saves money, allows people to eat healthier food, and can be used to impress the opposite sex.
I'm certainly no chef and I can't bake for peanuts, but I know how to cook decent meals. You're right, sister. It's a real shame.
 
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Tintin

Guest
#37
That's funny because I've seen the complete opposite. I'm a vegan and any time I have a cooked meal I make it from scratch, right down to the raw, organic veggies. I know plenty of girls who love hosting and cooking for their family and friends. It might just be your circle, as my experience is different.
Hmm... I would say we run in very different circles then. I'm certainly not a vegan, but I do try to use organic veggies. It's not always possible and sometimes you get shafted for your choice (they're a terrible product). My friends and family are omnivores and vegetarians, but I don't know any who are vegans. I imagine that factors into our different experiences. Still, I know plenty of guys who can't cook. So it's more that I know more girls who don't cook, rather than girls who can cook.
 

Roh_Chris

Senior Member
Jun 15, 2014
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#38
Hmm... I would say we run in very different circles then.
Is that an Aussie term bro? This is the first time I have read that phrase (or is it an idiom?). If you said that in India, people would think you were literally running in circles. :D