Does God Influence Our Hearts To Fall In Love With Certain People?

[seoulsearch]

Hi Singles!

The Interracial Dating thread made me think about the fact that I have known some people who seemed very intent on marrying within their own race, and others equally intent on marrying someone from a different race than their own.

Do you think that such preferences can be from God?

For me, as a single person, the story of Samson marrying his first wife (not Delilah) contains one of THE most intriguing passages in Scripture:

(Samson's marriage to a Philistine woman, Judges 14, starting at verse 3

Then his father and his mother said to him, "Is there no woman among the daughters of your relatives, or among all our people, that you go to take a wife from the uncircumcised Philistines?" But Samson said to his father, "Get her for me, for she looks good to me." However, his father and mother did not know that it was of the LORD, for He was seeking an occasion against the Philistines. Now at that time the Philistines were ruling over Israel.

One of my study Bibles translates verse 4 as, "His parents did not know that this was from the Lord, because the Lord was seeking an opportunity to confront the Philistines."

1. Samson, throughout his life, was attracted to Philistine women, and seemed to have his heart set on choosing women from among the enemies of Israel.

How much of this attraction, if any, was influenced by God? I am certainly NOT saying that God causes us to fall in love with certain people, because He gives us free will, but yet... this passage seems to show us yet another example of how God has His hand in everything.

2. What part of this whole situation was "from the Lord"? Did God put it on Samson's heart to marry a Philistine? After all, Samson had a long history of plenty of rebellious choices all on his own.

3. Do you believe God could tell you marry someone no one else approves of? How would you know if it was God or just your own heart wanting what it wants?

4. If you believe God wanted you to go through with a marriage no one else agreed with, would you still go through with it?

I'm looking forward to your thoughts, opinions, and Scriptures that might address this topic, as I'm not sure I've ever heard a 100% surefire answer.

 

[RememberTheSabbathDay]

Hi Singles!

The Interracial Dating thread made me think about the fact that I have known some people who seemed very intent on marrying within their own race, and others equally intent on marrying someone from a different race than their own.

Do you think that such preferences can be from God?

For me, as a single person, the story of Samson marrying his first wife (not Delilah) contains one of THE most intriguing passages in Scripture:

(Samson's marriage to a Philistine woman, Judges 14, starting at verse 3

Then his father and his mother said to him, "Is there no woman among the daughters of your relatives, or among all our people, that you go to take a wife from the uncircumcised Philistines?" But Samson said to his father, "Get her for me, for she looks good to me." However, his father and mother did not know that it was of the LORD, for He was seeking an occasion against the Philistines. Now at that time the Philistines were ruling over Israel.

One of my study Bibles translates verse 4 as, "His parents did not know that this was from the Lord, because the Lord was seeking an opportunity to confront the Philistines."

1. Samson, throughout his life, was attracted to Philistine women, and seemed to have his heart set on choosing women from among the enemies of Israel.

How much of this attraction, if any, was influenced by God? I am certainly NOT saying that God causes us to fall in love with certain people, because He gives us free will, but yet... this passage seems to show us yet another example of how God has His hand in everything.

2. What part of this whole situation was "from the Lord"? Did God put it on Samson's heart to marry a Philistine? After all, Samson had a long history of plenty of rebellious choices all on his own.

3. Do you believe God could tell you marry someone no one else approves of? How would you know if it was God or just your own heart wanting what it wants?

4. If you believe God wanted you to go through with a marriage no one else agreed with, would you still go through with it?

I'm looking forward to your thoughts, opinions, and Scriptures that might address this topic, as I'm not sure I've ever heard a 100% surefire answer.

Hello there sister seoulsearch,


Here is another instance of a similar situation with Hosea who the Lord told to marry a woman of whoredom because the people had committed whoredom with the pagan nations. God was showing them how deeply entrenched they were in serving other gods and how he loved them so much that He was not willing to give them up.

Look at Rehab the harlot, who would have ever thunk it? Jesus came through her linage. She obeyed the voice of God because she had heard what God did for His people and believed and God counted it unto her as righteousness. Who can know the mind of God?

So as the heavens are higher than the earth so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts higher than your thoughts. Isaiah 55:9

Both of these situations were definitely by divine appointment. Sister in any matter of the heart that involves the opposite sex, no matter the race, God must be the maker of it.



When u look at what the Lord says about all who partake of His life will be in the kingdom; every tongue, nation of people. God is no respecter of persons. So if God is in the plan for interracial marriages...then who can counter act His plans. This my sister is a matter of prayer and in all that we do, we are called to do to His glory.

Hosea 1


1 The word of the Lord that came unto Hosea, the son of Beeri, in the days of Uzziah, Jotham, Ahaz, and Hezekiah, kings of Judah, and in the days of Jeroboam the son of Joash, king of Israel.
[SUP]2 [/SUP]The beginning of the word of the Lord by Hosea. And the Lord said to Hosea, Go, take unto thee a wife of whoredoms and children of whoredoms: for the land hath committed great whoredom, departing from the Lord.
[SUP]3 [/SUP]So he went and took Gomer the daughter of Diblaim; which conceived, and bare him a son.
[SUP]4 [/SUP]And the Lord said unto him, Call his name Jezreel; for yet a little while, and I will avenge the blood of Jezreel upon the house of Jehu, and will cause to cease the kingdom of the house of Israel.
[SUP]5 [/SUP]And it shall come to pass at that day, that I will break the bow of Israel, in the valley of Jezreel.
[SUP]6 [/SUP]And she conceived again, and bare a daughter. And God said unto him, Call her name Loruhamah: for I will no more have mercy upon the house of Israel; but I will utterly take them away.
[SUP]7 [/SUP]But I will have mercy upon the house of Judah, and will save them by the Lord their God, and will not save them by bow, nor by sword, nor by battle, by horses, nor by horsemen.

[SUP]8 [/SUP]Now when she had weaned Loruhamah she conceived, and bare a son. [SUP]9 [/SUP]Then said God, Call his name Loammi: for ye are not my people, and I will not be your God.
[SUP]10 [/SUP]Yet the number of the children of Israel shall be as the sand of the sea, which cannot be measured nor numbered; and it shall come to pass, that in the place where it was said unto them, Ye are not my people, there it shall be said unto them, Ye are the sons of the living God.
[SUP]11 [/SUP]Then shall the children of Judah and the children of Israel be gathered together, and appoint themselves one head, and they shall come up out of the land: for great shall be the day of Jezreel.


I pray this helps.

 

[seoulsearch]

Hi Remember,

Thank you for taking the time to post.

One of the reasons I think about this is because I have often wondered if Hosea actually came to love Gomer, or if Hosea just loved God and was willing to sacrifice anything, even his own personal definition of romantic love, in order to obey God.

I think about this because in our world today, people have to notion of falling helplessly in love with someone and somehow sustaining that love forever, which obviously doesn't seem to work out very well for a good number of people.

I always think about the fact that God probably has a very different definition of "love" than we do. In Hosea 3:1, God tells Hosea to "go and love your wife again, even though she commits adultery with another," and it is even implied that some of "their" children were not actually Hosea's. I always wonder what Hosea felt. He SHOWED Gomer love through ACTIONS, but I wonder what his FEELINGS really were...

And what people today should be expecting--realistically--in our searches for love.

If I can give an honest answer, God telling Hosea to marry Gomer would be like God telling me to marry, let's say, Charlie Sheen. Pure devotion and faith in God would mandate that I would obey, but would I love the man?

Absolutely not, unless God performed some kind of super-miracle, because I would rather live alone than dealing with someone who constantly cheated.

In the case of Samson, it seems that Samson honestly believed he loved these women, though it might have been for questionable reasons. And so, I also wonder... Did God somehow give Samson an attraction to these women? Or was it just that God gave him a desire for a Philistine woman, and Samson then chose potential candidates on his own?

 

[PoetMary]

One of the reasons I think about this is because I have often wondered if Hosea actually came to love Gomer, or if Hosea just loved God and was willing to sacrifice anything, even his own personal definition of romantic love, in order to obey God.

I don't know that there really was a personal idea of romantic love. This, I believe, is a rather modern invention. Obviously people experienced desire and attraction, but the idea that one should seek out a romantic partner for a particular level of personal fulfillment wasn't part of the make-up of ancient Israel. Marriage was more functional and pragmatic. Also, the expectations about marital partners was quite different.

Having said that, Hosea (IMO) did display love to Gomer. Whether or not he felt ooey-gooey in his heart, his obedience to God was a demonstration of practical love--no matter what, you are not abandoned...I will come after you. This was both for Gomer's sake AND for the sake of Israel.

 

[JonahLynx]

I'd say that sometimes He does and sometimes He doesn't. Those are good examples being brought up of God influencing the circumstances, another could be Isaac and Rebekah. But then there are examples where God is not the one who is behind the attraction... David and Bathsheba, the woman at the well and her partners, Amnon and Tamar.

 

[RememberTheSabbathDay]

Hi Remember,

Thank you for taking the time to post.

One of the reasons I think about this is because I have often wondered if Hosea actually came to love Gomer, or if Hosea just loved God and was willing to sacrifice anything, even his own personal definition of romantic love, in order to obey God.

I think about this because in our world today, people have to notion of falling helplessly in love with someone and somehow sustaining that love forever, which obviously doesn't seem to work out very well for a good number of people.

I always think about the fact that God probably has a very different definition of "love" than we do. In Hosea 3:1, God tells Hosea to "go and love your wife again, even though she commits adultery with another," and it is even implied that some of "their" children were not actually Hosea's. I always wonder what Hosea felt. He SHOWED Gomer love through ACTIONS, but I wonder what his FEELINGS really were...

And what people today should be expecting--realistically--in our searches for love.

If I can give an honest answer, God telling Hosea to marry Gomer would be like God telling me to marry, let's say, Charlie Sheen. Pure devotion and faith in God would mandate that I would obey, but would I love the man?

Absolutely not, unless God performed some kind of super-miracle, because I would rather live alone than dealing with someone who constantly cheated.

In the case of Samson, it seems that Samson honestly believed he loved these women, though it might have been for questionable reasons. And so, I also wonder... Did God somehow give Samson an attraction to these women? Or was it just that God gave him a desire for a Philistine woman, and Samson then chose potential candidates on his own?

Sister seoulsearch,


God chose Samson before he was even conceived as a Judge against the Philistines but Samson chose to go against the will of God in the which he was already forewarned by his parents. Samson chose to enter into an unholy relationship with the enemy of God and this is where he lost all godly spiritual reasoning. The lower bases of the flesh were in control.
Even though Samson had walked away from God, God still used the occasion to take down the Philistines. God never meant for Samson to lose his eyes or his hair.

In Hosea's case, God seemed to continue with the traditions of the culture by just having Hosea take a wife, even if one has never met. In that cultural traditions of marriage, in that part of the country, going on dates was unheard of. Men chose the women they wanted even if the women protest. So from what I understand, love and getting to know each other comes way after children are conceived. Look at Rachael and Leah, Jacob had to marry Leah because she was the eldest daughter and in that culture, the eldest always married before the younger. Now Jacob loved Rachael as u can tell how he treated Benjamin and Joseph, his 2 sons favorite sons and the Bible tells us so.

Leah was always jealous of Rachael and rubbed her nose in the fact that she was barren and that she could have children by Jacob and this would make him love her. I always believe that the love that Jacob showed Leah was more out of respect because he was an upstanding gentleman. His father in law, Laban wanted to make sure that Jacob and Leah consummated the marriage before he offered Rachael to him. This way Laban knew if Leah got pregnant, that Jacob wouldn't leave her and the father in law held Jacob off seven years from Rachael so that Leah could form some kind of bond in Jacob's heart. Even after the death of Rachael, Jacob continued to pine over her death. U can see this when u read the conversation that Joseph had with His brother when they wanted him to bring Benjamin to Egypt as a test to see if they had changed their ways.

Even when we stray, God still sees opportunities to teach us lessons and bring us back to him, even though his methods may sometimes seem pretty brutal to us.

God knows the way that we should go.

So God used the situation in which Samson got himself into even though this was not the route that God had meant for him to take.

 

[zeroturbulence]

I don't know, but if He does do that sort of thing, then...

[video=youtube;Ug88HO2mg44]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ug88HO2mg44[/video]

 

[AsifinPassing]

Hi Singles!

The Interracial Dating thread made me think about the fact that I have known some people who seemed very intent on marrying within their own race, and others equally intent on marrying someone from a different race than their own.

Do you think that such preferences can be from God?

For me, as a single person, the story of Samson marrying his first wife (not Delilah) contains one of THE most intriguing passages in Scripture:

(Samson's marriage to a Philistine woman, Judges 14, starting at verse 3

Then his father and his mother said to him, "Is there no woman among the daughters of your relatives, or among all our people, that you go to take a wife from the uncircumcised Philistines?" But Samson said to his father, "Get her for me, for she looks good to me." However, his father and mother did not know that it was of the LORD, for He was seeking an occasion against the Philistines. Now at that time the Philistines were ruling over Israel.

One of my study Bibles translates verse 4 as, "His parents did not know that this was from the Lord, because the Lord was seeking an opportunity to confront the Philistines."

1. Samson, throughout his life, was attracted to Philistine women, and seemed to have his heart set on choosing women from among the enemies of Israel.

How much of this attraction, if any, was influenced by God? I am certainly NOT saying that God causes us to fall in love with certain people, because He gives us free will, but yet... this passage seems to show us yet another example of how God has His hand in everything.

2. What part of this whole situation was "from the Lord"? Did God put it on Samson's heart to marry a Philistine? After all, Samson had a long history of plenty of rebellious choices all on his own.

3. Do you believe God could tell you marry someone no one else approves of? How would you know if it was God or just your own heart wanting what it wants?

4. If you believe God wanted you to go through with a marriage no one else agreed with, would you still go through with it?

I'm looking forward to your thoughts, opinions, and Scriptures that might address this topic, as I'm not sure I've ever heard a 100% surefire answer.

What an interesting questions (per usual for you, Kim)! ^_^

To be honest, I don't know. I believe if we live close to God, careful to follow His footsteps, then He certainly directs our paths in greater detail. Sort of like handing your choices back over to Him. "I know I can choose, but please, you choose for me. Your choices always turn out better anyway..."

1. Seems like God was leading it, unless the writer simply saw it that way. Makes sense, either way, I think, but with slightly different implications.

2. That's another one which is difficult to answer. The text you quoted makes it seem that either: a) God helped influence the desire Samson had for a Philistine woman (or what I think is the more likely answer of...) b) God had some influence or plan to use Samson's desire for that woman particularly. Hence the, " 'She' looks good to me." vs saying, "Philistine women are more attractive."

3. Yes, and for the second part...I believe the only way to really know something is from God is through Scripture, Prayer, and Time.
For example, I've been in a relationship which God over the course of time (and eventually in one big moment) convicted me of, and that I ultimately ended. I've come back to Him time and time again, worried it was just me, or that I messed up, or had cold feet, or yada yada... but every time, I keep feeling like what I had done with her and in seeking her out apart from God was wrong, and that having chosen God over her (which was certainly not the case before the big moment) was not only the 'right' thing to do, but what God wants from me. He needs to be more important than any and everything else, period, and I want His plan for my life instead of my plan for my life.

4. Absolutely. *see the answer to 3*

 

[Lynx]

I don't know, but if He does do that sort of thing, then...

[video=youtube;Ug88HO2mg44]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ug88HO2mg44[/video]

*snickers*