Are we really unhappier than our parents?

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Roh_Chris

Senior Member
Jun 15, 2014
4,728
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#1
I came across this article a few months ago. But, with 2016 fast approaching and everybody having hopes, fears, plans, expectations and worries for the next year, I couldn't help but think about this article again.

Why Generation Y Yuppies Are Unhappy

The article begins with a comparison of our generation and our parents. The Generation X, a.k.a. the Baby Boomers, having grown up in an environment of gross instability, had pretty low expectations of themselves. Later, when life became better owing to peace and economic prosperity, their expectations were exceeded, in turn rendering them delighted and satisfied with life. According to the author, we, the Generation Y, are unhappy because of the difference between our expectations and our reality. This difference stems from our wildly ambitious and delusional characteristics. Also, we are often taunted by a phenomenon called "Facebook image crafting" where we see the "inflated successes of our peers". This crafting technique then makes us hurt ourselves for not achieving the "lofty expectations" we laid out, thereby making us even unhappier.

What are your comments on this -
1) Are we truly unhappier than our parents?
2) In a world which is highly competitive, where being "content" is viewed as a sign of complacency, how do we make sure that we are on top of our game and YET not running ourselves into the ground?
 
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MollyConnor

Guest
#2
I had read that article too and I thought it was right on point!

Yes, hand downs my parents are much happier than I am. My mom grew up picking fruits in the fields from a young age. The classrooms at her school didn't have AC. My dad was homeless a lot of the time and started smoking to stay warm at night (at age 7). They had it rough. Now that they both have decent jobs (inside, with AC, pay more than minimum wage, they get to sit down) they love it! They are both generally happy with the way life has turned out.

Me on the other hand, I thought I would at least be finished with college by now...:rolleyes: So I'm pretty disappointed with myself for that. A lot of it had to do with sick family members, but still. My expectations were high and I haven't even gotten to half of them...I probably never will. LOL

I think it's even worse for the generation below me. I'm talking about those kids that are currently in middle school or high school. I've talked to my cousins and their friends before and they all think life is easy and many of them want to be famous: youtube stars, movie directors, American Idol winners, celebrities of some sort...

I'd like to point out that my parents' generation didn't know about Jar Jar Binks...that alone makes life much better. :p
 
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Aug 2, 2009
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#3
Yes they are happier because they lived their lives when the world was still normal..
 
Jun 23, 2015
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#4
The world is a different place. God is the same today as he was yesterday.
Phil 4:13

Its no more difficult today as it was back in the 1800's.

I think we should focus on the summary:

1) Stay wildly ambitious. The current world is bubbling with opportunity for an ambitious person to find flowery, fulfilling success. The specific direction may be unclear, but it’ll work itself out—just dive in somewhere.
2) Stop thinking that you’re special. The fact is, right now, you’re not special. You’re another completely inexperienced young person who doesn’t have all that much to offer yet. You can become special by working really hard for a long time.
3) Ignore everyone else. Other people’s grass seeming greener is no new concept, but in today’s image crafting world, other people’s grass looks like a glorious meadow. The truth is that everyone else is just as indecisive, self-doubting, and frustrated as you are, and if you just do your thing, you’ll never have any reason to envy others.


If you are willing to work hard you will succeed. God will lead you onto the right path if you follow him with all your heart,your mind, and your soul!

Dont have that entitlement mind set. It works against you. Refer to #2.
 

PennEd

Senior Member
Apr 22, 2013
12,814
8,590
113
#5
I came across this article a few months ago. But, with 2016 fast approaching and everybody having hopes, fears, plans, expectations and worries for the next year, I couldn't help but think about this article again.

Why Generation Y Yuppies Are Unhappy

The article begins with a comparison of our generation and our parents. The Generation X, a.k.a. the Baby Boomers, having grown up in an environment of gross instability, had pretty low expectations of themselves. Later, when life became better owing to peace and economic prosperity, their expectations were exceeded, in turn rendering them delighted and satisfied with life. According to the author, we, the Generation Y, are unhappy because of the difference between our expectations and our reality. This difference stems from our wildly ambitious and delusional characteristics. Also, we are often taunted by a phenomenon called "Facebook image crafting" where we see the "inflated successes of our peers". This crafting technique then makes us hurt ourselves for not achieving the "lofty expectations" we laid out, thereby making us even unhappier.

What are your comments on this -
1) Are we truly unhappier than our parents?
2) In a world which is highly competitive, where being "content" is viewed as a sign of complacency, how do we make sure that we are on top of our game and YET not running ourselves into the ground?
This is a great question. However Gen x-ers (1965-1982) are a distinct group, separate from baby boomers (1946-1964). My opinion is that boomers(me), and to a lesser extent Gen-xers, had happier childhoods. This is almost completely due to the avalanche of news and social media today's youth must traverse. I shutter to think if there was such a proliferation of cameras and platforms to post the unbelievably stupid things I did as a youth.
Couple this with a deteriorating social moral foundation and you have a recipe for unhappiness.

Having said that, it is VITAL to understand that Jesus is the only true Joy in any generation.
 
W

wwjd_kilden

Guest
#6
I think there is much truth in that.
Turning adult now means you are expected to be superman, just read the job ads:


- "You must have knowledge in the following technologies : *endless list, half of which I've never heard of * "

- "Must be self driven and work well individually AND in a team"
(Nature says if you work great on your own you are likely to work less well in a team and vice versa)

- "We are looking for you who just finished your education (...) you have three or more years of experience"
(uh, but you just said... nevermind)

- Must be able to multitask and handle a hectic environment
(Science says people CAN'T multitask, and that stress kills you... so yea, way to go advertising the company :p )
 

Reborn

Senior Member
Nov 16, 2014
4,087
216
63
#7
I came across this article a few months ago. But, with 2016 fast approaching and everybody having hopes, fears, plans, expectations and worries for the next year, I couldn't help but think about this article again.

Why Generation Y Yuppies Are Unhappy

The article begins with a comparison of our generation and our parents. The Generation X, a.k.a. the Baby Boomers, having grown up in an environment of gross instability, had pretty low expectations of themselves. Later, when life became better owing to peace and economic prosperity, their expectations were exceeded, in turn rendering them delighted and satisfied with life. According to the author, we, the Generation Y, are unhappy because of the difference between our expectations and our reality. This difference stems from our wildly ambitious and delusional characteristics. Also, we are often taunted by a phenomenon called "Facebook image crafting" where we see the "inflated successes of our peers". This crafting technique then makes us hurt ourselves for not achieving the "lofty expectations" we laid out, thereby making us even unhappier.

What are your comments on this -
1) Are we truly unhappier than our parents?
2) In a world which is highly competitive, where being "content" is viewed as a sign of complacency, how do we make sure that we are on top of our game and YET not running ourselves into the ground?


Great post, PopClick.
 
S

Siberian_Khatru

Guest
#8
My parents are a mixed bag; dad is relatively content, while mom is not at all. I'm not sure I have any firm position with where I stand with life, so I guess you could say I'm confused, maybe frustrated. Wah waaah (Debbie Downer sound bit)...

Speaking generally, it would not be surprising if we were "deemed" unhappier than our parents' generation. We have a lot going for us, and a lot working against us.

Sooo...

1) Probably.
2) Contentment should not be blurred with complacency. Everyone has to figure out their own pace.

P.S - Somewhat unrelated but kind of pertinent for anyone that's interested: Dave Meslin: The Antidote to Apathy (Ted Talks)
 
Feb 7, 2015
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#9
I think it's mostly up to us.

It is true that human beings start life with a biological predisposition to irrational thinking, which they then add to by learning new and harmful ways of behaving and viewing life. But there is a positive side to human nature - we also have the ability to think about our beliefs and change the dysfunctional ones.

Abraham Lincoln is purported to have looked across a room, and upon watching a certain person for awhile, said... "I don't think I like that man... I believe I'll go over, and get to know him."

This capability is within each of us... concerning just about any situation you might name.
 
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Aug 2, 2009
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#10
This is a great question. However Gen x-ers (1965-1982) are a distinct group, separate from baby boomers (1946-1964).
^^^That is correct. Gen X'ers are not baby boomers.
 
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cinder

Senior Member
Mar 26, 2014
4,327
2,358
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#11
I don't know that I would say unhappier, but I think the article makes a good point about our expectations being unreasonably high and optimistic. I would add that I think it is also much more difficult for young adults today to adjust to the idea of having to lower their standard of living to live an independent adult life. Oh and our economy (especially in the US) is pretty much in the business of trying to make us unhappy with what we have so we buy more stuff.

Why do you think we need to be at the top of our game? One thing I've been thinking about more and more is whether it is better to be busy and successful or lazy and happy. There is a balance, but I'm not sure that pushing for ever greater "success" is an inherently Christian value.

Good thoughts and good article Roh.
 

Roh_Chris

Senior Member
Jun 15, 2014
4,728
58
48
#13
Thank you PennEd and ZT for pointing out that GenX'ers and Baby Boomers belonged to two different periods. :)

Like Molly and Cinder pointed out, I also have placed unreasonable expectations on myself. It probably stems from the feeling of entitlement. Or, maybe (and I am only hypothesizing here), if we explain this in the context of Maslow's Hierarchy, our needs are of a higher level than the generations before us, simply because the lower levels have already been met. I can put forward a parallel to explain this - let's compare a kid from a billionaire family and a kid from a poverty-stricken family. What do you think would make each kid happy?

Billionaire kid - the latest gadgets, fancy car, expensive holidays, education in Ivy League, tailcoat parties, etc.
Poor kid - basic needs of food, clothing and shelter.

In my opinion, the poor kid may live in a run-down, dingy home and still be happier than the billionaire kid, so long as his basic needs are met. So, I don't think this problem is specific to a Generation, it is more socio-economical in nature.

Why do you think we need to be at the top of our game? One thing I've been thinking about more and more is whether it is better to be busy and successful or lazy and happy. There is a balance, but I'm not sure that pushing for ever greater "success" is an inherently Christian value.
In a dog eat dog world, where everyone is on his/her own, I think we run the risk of being swallowed up by the "competition" if we so much as even sit and relax for a month. I am not even talking of pushing for greater success; I am talking of merely staying competitive and holding our spot in the race. For instance, every company wants to cut costs in some way or the other, in order to stay afloat. One area where they do this is in the remuneration of their employees. On many occasions, I have heard managers arguing for sacking a higher paid, senior employee, in order to hire a lower paid, junior employee. And if you dive into the issue, it is only because the senior employee was content with doing his job and over time, moving from being a valuable employee for the company to a replaceable employee.

There has to be something wrong in the way we are progressing, especially when senior employees are signing up for classes to learn a new skill, simply because they fear they would lose out in the race.
 
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Siberian_Khatru

Guest
#14
let's compare a kid from a billionaire family and a kid from a poverty-stricken family. What do you think would make each kid happy?

Billionaire kid - the latest gadgets, fancy car, expensive holidays, education in Ivy League, tailcoat parties, etc.
Poor kid - basic needs of food, clothing and shelter.
That's purely subjective.

Did you ever read Into the Wild by Jon Krakauer? That kid had a fairly well to do family and was taken care of, yet bailed on it all; donated thousands of dollars in savings, left his car behind, and adopted a very minimalist style of living (and he's not the only example). Then you have the antithesis; cases of a poverty stricken individual achieving great "success" (consider Oprah), or even those that opt to abandon the Amish community during Rumspringa for a new - usually more modernized and lavish - lifestyle.

In my opinion, the poor kid may live in a run-down, dingy home and still be happier than the billionaire kid, so long as his basic needs are met. So, I don't think this problem is specific to a Generation, it is more socio-economical in nature.
This is where I'd probably agree. There was a study years ago that documented how happy people were in various communities across the globe. The communities that maintained a greater sense of community (i.e. the individuals that were more involved with and supported one another) were widely seen as happier than the ones where neighbors were nothing more than familiar strangers, and where each person's aspirations didn't stretch beyond the rat race. It's a sad day, also, when we're so connected to people across the internet, yet are so disconnected from people 2 doors down from us.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
24,799
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#15
I don't know about any official studies. All I know is I'm pretty happy with my life. And a lot of people around me seem content with their lives.

Maybe it's because I live in the South. I hear people aren't nearly as happy up north. But that's only what I hear, I never went up there to see for myself.
 

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
May 23, 2009
14,940
4,580
113
#16
Great post, PopClick.
Oh I know, the avatar is totally throwing me for a loop and is causing a delay in my making a serious reply, because I keep wanting to calling him "Pop_Roh."
 

cinder

Senior Member
Mar 26, 2014
4,327
2,358
113
#17
For instance, every company wants to cut costs in some way or the other, in order to stay afloat. One area where they do this is in the remuneration of their employees. On many occasions, I have heard managers arguing for sacking a higher paid, senior employee, in order to hire a lower paid, junior employee. And if you dive into the issue, it is only because the senior employee was content with doing his job and over time, moving from being a valuable employee for the company to a replaceable employee.

There has to be something wrong in the way we are progressing, especially when senior employees are signing up for classes to learn a new skill, simply because they fear they would lose out in the race.
I'll agree that there's something wrong with the way we are progressing and I think you just hit on another reason why our generation struggles with frustration. We were taught that hard work would pay off, but now it seems like companies have little value even for the good, dedicated, hard working employees. They'll drop you in a heartbeat to save themselves money. In such an environment, what can keep people motivated to work hard?
 
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Siberian_Khatru

Guest
#18
We were taught that hard work would pay off, but now it seems like companies have little value even for the good, dedicated, hard working employees.
That's very true. Loyalty on both sides is becoming a forgotten virtue.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
24,799
8,103
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#19
Somebody mentioned the neighbor two doors down... our neighbor two doors down was up here for Christmas breakfast, and we went down there for lunch. He knows how to make german potato salad. And they were surprised that I knew what german potato salad is. And I fixed his desktop PC for him last Sunday.


But again, it might just be because we're in the South. Maybe up north people don't know their neighbors.
 
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Siberian_Khatru

Guest
#20
Somebody mentioned the neighbor two doors down... our neighbor two doors down was up here for Christmas breakfast, and we went down there for lunch. He knows how to make german potato salad. And they were surprised that I knew what german potato salad is. And I fixed his desktop PC for him last Sunday.


But again, it might just be because we're in the South. Maybe up north people don't know their neighbors.
The South... isn't that where all the black guys are said to be lazy, and all the white guys complain about how lazy the black guys are, but the white guys are just as lazy? :p