Just a question

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LazyDaisy88

Guest
#1
#1
Have any other single people on here had married people ask you for advice about their marriage? I have and I really don't feel it's my place to give advice. One reason being that I'm not married nor have I ever been. I honestly don't feel comfortable giving advice like that. It just makes me feel awkward. I've had some ask me for advice and I gave it with reservation and I let them know that as well. I just find it difficult to give advice about something that I've never experienced. The only thing I can really do is show them Scriptures pertaining to marriage and that's it. Does this make anyone else feel awkward or am I just the odd one out? lol
 
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coby

Guest
#2
#2
I have given people advice because I'm divorced and know exactly how to not do it LOL.
But I remember when I was 18 and never had a boyfriend this married woman in church started to talk to my brother and me about her husband who only read the Bible and didn't want sex anymore, lol during coffee after the service. We were like: ooookay. Awkward.
 
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LazyDaisy88

Guest
#3
#3
Well, what I don't understand is that I had some, not all, ask knowing that I've never been married and when I gave them Scriptures, their response was basically I've never been married so I should not give advice. My question is, "Why even ask me then?" lol
 
M

MissCris

Guest
#4
#4
Sometimes it helps simply to get a different perspective- and sometimes the most objective advice comes from those who have never experienced whatever the advice is about.
 
U

Ugly

Guest
#5
#5
Why didn't you just ask them?

Often people ask advice wanting to hear what they want. If you don't tell them what they want to hear then they turn on you. So chances are you are not the first they asked, but rather looking for someone to support their view.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
zeroturbulence

zeroturbulence

Senior Member
#6
Aug 2, 2009
24,581
4,269
113
#6
It doesn't really matter who gives advice as long as it's good advice... I'd rather get good advice from someone who's wise but never married than someone who's been married but gives lousy advice.
 
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crosstweed

Guest
#7
#7
Not married couples, but I have had people ask for advice in their dating relationships... They followed it and it fixed the problem. *shrugs* Apparently I give good advice about things I have no personal experience in.
 
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Lost_sheep

Guest
#8
#8
I refrain from giving advice to anyone about any topic. The merest whisper can take root and alter a person's life forever. Not necessarily for the best.
 
Tinkerbell725

Tinkerbell725

Senior Member
#9
Jul 19, 2014
4,216
1,179
113
Philippines Age 40
#9
Im not married so the best I can offer is encouragement to those with marital problems who ask for advice. Experience does not always mean you are credible and wiser. Paying attention to people and learning from their mistakes sometimes is much better because you get to bypass the messy part.
 
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Ariel82

Guest
#10
#10
Men should ask men not single women. And wome, shouldn't ask single men for .arriage advice.
 
Dan58

Dan58

Senior Member
#11
Nov 13, 2013
1,991
338
83
#11
LazyDaisy88 said:
Have any other single people on here had married people ask you for advice about their marriage? I have and I really don't feel it's my place to give advice. One reason being that I'm not married nor have I ever been. I honestly don't feel comfortable giving advice like that. It just makes me feel awkward. I've had some ask me for advice and I gave it with reservation and I let them know that as well. I just find it difficult to give advice about something that I've never experienced. The only thing I can really do is show them Scriptures pertaining to marriage and that's it. Does this make anyone else feel awkward or am I just the odd one out? lol
Click to expand...

If they ask, tell them what you think... You don't need to jump in a pig pen to know you'll get muddy. If they don't like your answers, just tell them they got what they paid for. And the next time they ask a question, just say; "I'm relatively positive you don't want to know what I think" :).. As Christians, I think we have a responsibility to provide biblical answers when possible, and always remember, lots of people didn't particularly like the answers Jesus provided either.
 
AsifinPassing

AsifinPassing

Senior Member
#12
Jul 13, 2010
3,608
40
48
#12
LazyDaisy88 said:
Have any other single people on here had married people ask you for advice about their marriage? I have and I really don't feel it's my place to give advice. One reason being that I'm not married nor have I ever been. I honestly don't feel comfortable giving advice like that. It just makes me feel awkward. I've had some ask me for advice and I gave it with reservation and I let them know that as well. I just find it difficult to give advice about something that I've never experienced. The only thing I can really do is show them Scriptures pertaining to marriage and that's it. Does this make anyone else feel awkward or am I just the odd one out? lol
Click to expand...

I wouldn't say it makes me feel 'awkward', but I relate with you on not feeling it's my place to say. I'll share my thoughts, some scriptures, and examples from married people, counseling, etc...that I know... but I always qualify or end such statements with:

"...but I've never been married or had a healthy, lasting relationship, so I'm probably not the one to ask."
 
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ntw1103

Guest
#13
#13
Yes, It actually happens quite often, and I find it a bit awkward. It is more often from women than men. It isn't the asking advice that is awkward, but when a married women sends me a PM, it throws up red flags in my mind.
I also get asked for relationship advice quite a lot. I find this extremely ironic, since I've never been in a relationship and struggle to even say hi to a girl.. *rolls eyes*
 
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