Hilarious Story ;P

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Elijah19

Guest
#1
#1
:rolleyes: Sooo... This is kinda embarrassing drama, but I thought people on here might like to hear it since we're single and all (being as this is the Singles Forum). It's good for a laugh, but I don't know if you could extrapolate anything Christian or non-Christian from it either way...

A while back, I was taking a Chemistry class in college. I was super board while taking a test (which I was acing anyway), and started bemoaning how I didn't have a girlfriend. I was so absorbed in my mental woes that I didn't even notice I had started talking out loud.

Apparently I started saying the phrase, "Why don't I have a girlfriend? Where is she? It's so horrible that I don't have one!" over and over again at increasingly louder volumes as I was staring blankly at my completed Chemistry test.

According to my classmates (which told me later), I started holding my head and yelling it like a madman at the top of my lungs. I can distinctly remember that from between my fingers, in a land far away, the voice of the teacher brought me back into reality from another world. "Elijah... Elijah... Elijahhhh!... ELIJAH!!!" I look up at him perplexed, having no idea I was doing it. The teacher looks up at me with a half-amused-half-freaked out expression and says, "I don't know why you don't have a girlfriend yet, Elijah! If I could get you one, I would, but I can't. Now please pass in your test and stop screaming about it.

As I walked up to his desk, one guy stood up and patted me on the back and said, "I feel you dude. I'm in the same boat. Keep strong, bro." I was so grateful for his understanding. As I went back to my desk, some girl in the back said, "Yeah... same here! Why don't I have a boyfriend?"

Then the whole class gets into a discussion about why everyone in it is single. The test is abruptly forgotten and the teacher has to yell several times (after mentioning he wouldn't mind going on a date himself) that we should continue and finish. After the test, he makes a special announcement to the whole class that, since everyone in it is single and desperate, they should all start dating each other, and that Elijah (me) was especially needy.

Anyway, I aced the test, but the whole class never looked at me like I was sane again. The girl in the back had a thing for me after that though. But I wasn't interested in her because she wasn't a Believer...

Hope you found my story of insanity amusing...
 
Last edited by a moderator:
Roh_Chris

Roh_Chris

Senior Member
#3
Jun 15, 2014
4,728
58
48
#3
Elijah19 said:
Then the whole class gets into a discussion about why everyone in it is single. The test is abruptly forgotten and the teacher has to yell several times (after mentioning he wouldn't mind going on a date himself) that we should continue and finish. After the test, he makes a special announcement to the whole class that, since everyone in it is single and desperate, they should all start dating each other, and that Elijah (me) was especially needy.
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This story gave me a chuckle, thanks for sharing it! :D

One question though - if everybody in the class started dating each other, who would the teacher date? :p
 
T

Tintin

Guest
#4
#4
Oh, I enjoyed that story far too much! Thanks for the laugh. :D
 
C

cmarieh

Guest
#5
#5
That's awesome! Kinda reminds me of something that happened back in high school.
 
kodiak

kodiak

Senior Member
#6
Mar 8, 2015
4,995
290
83
#6
Elijah19 said:
:rolleyes: Sooo... This is kinda embarrassing drama, but I thought people on here might like to hear it since we're single and all (being as this is the Singles Forum). It's good for a laugh, but I don't know if you could extrapolate anything Christian or non-Christian from it either way...

A while back, I was taking a Chemistry class in college. I was super board while taking a test (which I was acing anyway), and started bemoaning how I didn't have a girlfriend. I was so absorbed in my mental woes that I didn't even notice I had started talking out loud.

Apparently I started saying the phrase, "Why don't I have a girlfriend? Where is she? It's so horrible that I don't have one!" over and over again at increasingly louder volumes as I was staring blankly at my completed Chemistry test.

According to my classmates (which told me later), I started holding my head and yelling it like a madman at the top of my lungs. I can distinctly remember that from between my fingers, in a land far away, the voice of the teacher brought me back into reality from another world. "Elijah... Elijah... Elijahhhh!... ELIJAH!!!" I look up at him perplexed, having no idea I was doing it. The teacher looks up at me with a half-amused-half-freaked out expression and says, "I don't know why you don't have a girlfriend yet, Elijah! If I could get you one, I would, but I can't. Now please pass in your test and stop screaming about it.

As I walked up to his desk, one guy stood up and patted me on the back and said, "I feel you dude. I'm in the same boat. Keep strong, bro." I was so grateful for his understanding. As I went back to my desk, some girl in the back said, "Yeah... same here! Why don't I have a boyfriend?"

Then the whole class gets into a discussion about why everyone in it is single. The test is abruptly forgotten and the teacher has to yell several times (after mentioning he wouldn't mind going on a date himself) that we should continue and finish. After the test, he makes a special announcement to the whole class that, since everyone in it is single and desperate, they should all start dating each other, and that Elijah (me) was especially needy.

Anyway, I aced the test, but the whole class never looked at me like I was sane again. The girl in the back had a thing for me after that though. But I wasn't interested in her because she wasn't a Believer...

Hope you found my story of insanity amusing...
Click to expand...
Awesome story. Was that the only topic that the whole class actually started discussing?
 
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Elijah19

Guest
#7
#7
To my knowledge, the teacher eventually got to date a woman who, today, is his wife (go figure)! She actually writes poetry for him, but won't let him see it until she's finished.

For myself, I didn't get to date anyone. But some guy in y class called Kevin started dating an Asian girl called Amber. The girl who wanted to date me was a nonbeliever, and kind of a wild bad-party animal, so I didn't really have any interest in her. Strange thing though: after the story I told, virtually everybody in the class did start dating each other... Before then everybody was just as single as me. :eek: :confused:
 
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Elijah19

Guest
#8
#8
cmarieh, what happened in high school?
 
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